Anyone else /failedsuicide/ here? What is it like for you? What

>>37434912
sorry i'm not a normie which means i wouldn't fail my suicide to gain attention

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>>37434912
Tried to kill myself with pills, but I just took a bunch of random ones that didn't actually do anything. I also tried cutting my wrists, but I didn't have the willpower to actually go deep enough to do any bleeding.

>>37435012
Dude that sucks.

Yeah, sadly random OD has a low success rate, you gotta do research on the effects of OD'ing to see how you can make it into suicide.

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>>37435040
Well the entire reason I chose that method is because I know a lot of people who survive suicides end up wishing they had never tried it in the first place, so I figured if I take pills or cut my wrists then I'll still have time to get help and save myself should I regret my decision. I've also prayed for God to kill me a bunch of times, but he said no every time.

I'm fine now though, I feel okay and haven't had suicidal thoughts in a long time.

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>>37434912
This is how I just know you're pathetic. Failing a suicide, just wow.

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>>37435012
>textbook attention grab

Yeah no you didn't "try" anything. Just admit to yourself you wanted attention. All it takes to kill your self is a shoelace, a belt or a tie and a doorknob. That's how Robbin Williams went out for fucks sake. It's fool proof but not coward proof. When people really want to die it's not hard at all to accomplish.

So fucking tired of you faggots who say "lol ye tried to kill myself with Tylenol hehe ;)"

I didn't fail in an attempt, but I just didn't go through with it.
It's hard to continue with living when I've accepted death. I can't get out of that mentality that I'm living at the end of my life. I don't feel like I have a future ahead of me. I feel like I'm dead already and everything around me is like TV.
It's like actually shooting myself is only the last step of the dying process, and I'm already mostly dead.

>>37434912
I know your feels anon-kun.


>Everything feels unreal.
>Feel like I am in some kind of purgatory that mimmics real life but is actually a special subtle kind of hell meant to torment me further.
I relate to this on a level that I've never experienced. I think this daily.

>Everything feels truly meaningless afterwards, instead of just hopeless.

Im INTP, so everything has always felt completely pointless, but that was like normal life goals type of shit. Now even things that were fun have no meaning, I stopped playing video games, watching tv, everything. I just shit faced and live leak/sjws getting rekt after work now.

>>37435177
Now that's what I call dissociation volume 12.

Go to a therapist, get some pills, and bullshit some life stuff. You'll be fine.

>>37435425
>shit faced
>watch live leak/sjw videos
Sorry for big typos see my first correction in this post.

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>>37435012
>Tried to kill myself with pills
>He fell for the pill meme
bwahahaha

>>37435441
I just got off some pills. I'm tired of pills.

>am hopeless
>try to kill self
>fail
>am hopeless + people pity me and talk to me with that annoying baby "hey, buddy, you OK?
I get sad sometimes, too, you know..." voice now

Things went from bad to fucking horrifying.

>>37435441
>>37435425

I'm >>37435177 i also feel similarly, not exactly to his level but the whole everything is like tv part. Example
>when walking
>super obsessed with the sounds my feet make
>go as far as to figure out how the sound is being made externally by a third party, and overlaid to me actually walking.
Nothing feels real.
Also this
>I can't get out of that mentality that I'm living at the end of my life. I don't feel like I have a future ahead of me.
I feel like I should have died, if I didnt, and it's just a matter of time before the course corrects and I'm gone. I think that comes from every thing feeling completely meaningless now. I have no purpose at all.

>>37435647
Sorry for being super annoying. I'm not 177, I'm 425.

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This is my biggest fear desu. - Failing it.
I would've planned it out so that I would definitely die. Like shotgun or jumping.

>>37435136
get a fucking tripcode you fucking faggot so I can filter you out.

>>37435839
Stop telling me what to do. I'm never going to get one, literally deal with it loser.

>>37434912
>failed suicide attempt in 2014 (Exit bag/Helium)
>slight brain damage
>mild loss/lowering of motor skills
>lost the ability to drive a car
>speak with slightly slurred speech
>anxiety, paranoia and anger issues have increased

This is Hell.

If you """fail""" to suicide, outside of simple misfortune like only crippling yourself or not blowing your brains apart enough, it means you were doing it for attention.

>>37435932
please go into more detail

>>37435932
>Failed exit bag
Impossible. Even the diluted helium will still kill you.

>>37434912
I had a fentanyl od a few years ago. I should have died but didn't and I didn't get medical help. Don't really feel different than before

>>37436400
Is it a good way to die? or is it agony?

>>37436416
It was really peaceful. 10/10 way to die I'd say

>>37436350
The helium isn't what kills you anon it's the lack of oxygen

>>37436464
Are you trying to sound smart? Even the diluted helium that's 10% or whatever oxygen by volume will asphyxiant you in an exit bag. The only way to fail an exit bag is to burst a lung because of pressure being too high, or because you stopped it within the 60 or so seconds you get before unconsciousness sets in.

>>37436400
How did you get it, and how much do you need? This method really activates my almonds as in I may consider it some day

>>37436527
I "stole" it from a dead person. Still fe scummy for that. But you can probably get it on the deepweb or from a dealer or whatever. I can't remember what the lethal dose is but you can look that shit up.

>>37436416
Opiate OD is best way to die at all. I haven't had a big enough one to kill me, but accidentally enough to end up in the hospital.
>kicks in, feel mellow and calm
>shortly after, awash in waves of euphoria
>totally relaxed, everything is perfect
>start to nod, keeping eyes open difficult
>pass out
>die, if enough taken
It's my #1 choice. But you would want to inject a large amount of something powerful (fentynil, hydromorphome, oxymorphone, heroin) and I would snort some first just to enjoy it more before ending it.

I tried the faggot way and took random pills from our meds box.
It didn't kill me, but I ended up shaking out of control the day after. Had to confess to my mom what I did after she found me on the floor trying to keep my head in its place.

It hurted, doctor called me a coward and everybody on my family stoped talking to me outside gatherings and stuff.

Nothing changed on the long term, wished I had a gun to give it a real try.

>>37436808
Opiates would be my favourite group of drugs ever if they wouldn't give me horrible constipation

>>37436808
Last time I caught a nod on opiates, I threw up and the voices in my head which I hadn't heard in years came back to torment me. I felt like shit all night.
And the next day I still wanted more opiates. That's how I knew that shit was evil. I can't imagine an overdose being anything but unpleasant.

>>37436901
Well with you hearing voices and all you're probably not the norm.

>tried to hang myself
>bedsheets too stretchy
>give up and carry on as usual
>been almost 2 years
>no one knows, life is still just as shitty
>perception of time is completely warped, still feel like i'm in high school

>took xanax & drank a bunch because I was sad
>black out for 24 hrs
>took rest of xanax and drank the rest
>call crisis hotline because I'm sad

So I woke up feeling very jovial in the ER and got involuntary committed. Which actually changed my life long-term because I realised the "psychiatry" meme is bullshit, quit psych meds and stopped being a shut-in NEET.

I'm tempted to go stand on top of a building just for attention. I don't want to die, I just want one person to care about me. One person to tell me "you're wanted in this world."
I'll probably drunk enough to where if no one cares I'll just take the plunge

I put a 7.62x39 through my heart when i was 17, the idea being that if something went wrong with a head shot i'd be trapped in a vegetable body forever, whereas there's no triaging a shredded heart or surviving that amount of rapid blood loss.

Of course the heart isn't located above your left tit like all the stupid gay drawings show so all i did was put a hole clean through my lung, shoulder blade, and out my back. Passed out from the pain and shock, the neighbors reported gunfire, and i remember waking up a few times on the way to the ER before finally coming to at the minsec psychiatric wing.

I went through the motions just to get out asap but nothing really changed, i met a qt grill inside that's been in and out for years and was fun to talk to but they weren't letting her out for a while and being minors at the time there was no way of exchanging contact info so that just vanished the moment i got out.

Tbh i'd put that bullet where it should have gone right now if i could get anywhere near a gun again, i'm too much of a pussy to do it with anything else and all the bullshit that's supposedly painless is too prone to failure.

>>37437145
They'd be lying in order to fulfill some imagined moral obligation and/or to feel good about themselves. If you genuinely want out and haven't had prior attempts, get a gun and do it right, unlike me.

>>37437423
You can probably get one through a private sale. But I don't really want you to contribute to gun crime statistics

I didn't attempt suicide but I had really bad health anxiety and genuinely believed I was dying, had lots of panic attacks etc... All it changed in me is that I realise I was secretly hoping I was dying and was kind if excited at the time. Now I know I'm fine and I don't want to be here.

The whole experience has made me want to help people more though. I became an organ donor and I'm starting to give blood whenever I can.

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I wish this guy would show up and share his story. He's probably still in a psych ward getting drugged up. Godspeed (I forget your name).

>>37435441
Not him, but like I told my mom, if I wasn't born to be a regular human being, I'm not going to take pills and pretend to be one. Fuck the medicine men

I almost died two times but it wasn't really an actual suicide attempt but more like a fucking off for a while but I still hope I die thing. Although I almost did die the first time by alcohol poisoning.
The second happened a month ago and it was stupid.

But you those shitters that keep saying that you'll be happy that you survived? Fucking liars, I honestly wish I had actually died because I would have if I hadn't been found by complete accident.

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>turn 18
>mom says she's going to kick me out if my dad's family doesn't buy me a car
>mom keeps hitting me with her shoe
>"I wish I never fucking had you"
>"If you kill yourself it'll be good, because then your father's genes will be wiped out"
>"If you don't get a car and money for college from your father, you're out of this house"
>"every day I pray for when I don't have to see you again"
>"all I ever wanted was to live alone"
>"I'm disgusted when I see you"
>"I failed"
>upset like a bitch
>tell my dad I'm going to kill myself, riding my bike, crying
>riding my bike to local casino so that I can fling myself off of the 7th story of the parking lot
>"Don't do it anon, I already called the security there, if you go there, you'll get arrested."
>shouldn't have ever fucking told him
>still trying to summon up the courage to go again

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>>37439049
Here's another story
>be me also 18
>ride my bike over towards luxury apartment skyrise
>come to lobby, extremely well decorated, smells nice, can see treadmills to the left, rich chads and staceys walking in and out of the guarded entrance
>walk up to this faggot middle eastern looking metrosexual and ask if I can tour any rooms with the obvious intention of flinging myself off the balcony
>he agrees, get visited by some fat bitch staff lady who asks me for my email and information and shit
>asks me why I wanted to see the apartments
>"my grandfather died, so I know I have...options."
>completely made up
>dumb bitch believes it, starts making me tour rooms
>tour two rooms on the 5th floor, empty, clean, but not high enough
>"do you have anything higher? something with more of a view?"
>"Ahhh, yes, we have one empty room on the 19th floor, but the paint is unfortunately drying, so we can't go up there."
>fuck
>"oh alright then. I think I've seen enough"
>she leads me out, gives me some stupid fucking folder with her information that I leave out in the parking lot.
>I was that close.

>>37435150
>Tylenol
Can thin the lining of your stomach but I get yer point.

>>37437423
>7.62x39 through my heart when i was 17,
I think you mean 7.62x25 because that would kill you.

>>37434912
>gassed myself
>woke up, stopped it
>what the fuck were you thinking, etc
>nothing really changed

Subtle hell feeling was already there before I did it

>>37436864
Just keep stocked up on benefiber, and Metamucil, and you're good.

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>>37435177
>I didn't fail in an attempt, but I just didn't go through with it.
>It's hard to continue with living when I've accepted death. I can't get out of that mentality that I'm living at the end of my life. I don't feel like I have a future ahead of me. I feel like I'm dead already and everything around me is like TV.

goddammit m8, i feel exactly the same. problem is that you cant put effort into something when you feel like youre dead anyways which just makes thing worse and i get pushed further into the cycle

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Any robots know anyone who killed themselves? What were they like? How did they finally go?

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>>37439737
i know a guy. he was a little odd but fit in well enough with the semi-normal crowd. didnt know him too well. went by hanging i assume

>>37439737
>2nd grade
>move to new school in new state, 6th move so far
>everyone is a total cunt but 1 kid, Tyler
>Tyler is super nice, shares crayons, welcomes me to his table, shows me the class hampster, The while 9 yards.
>instant best friends, and probably one of the only true friends I've ever had
>one day he invites me over after school
>fuckyes.gif
>he has sister, Dani, 2.5 years younger.
To this day I remember looking at her in her highchair making a mess with her spegitti, just butter no sauce or meatballs, that first night, and thinking how cute she was, despite eating there countless times.
>fast forward to freshman year
>Tyler changed schools because we didn't have football team
>try to stay in contact, but lose touch
>JR year, Dani stays with our school
>genuinely love her (no romantic) go well out of my way to make sure I see her every day. The one person I'm always certain to talk to.
>January 25 2006, get back from my welding class
>intercepted by friend Erika, she just grabs me and starts uncontrollably sobbing
>wtf happend?!!
>i-i-its Dani. S-shes dead anon. She's fucking dead.
>WHAT?!
>S-she commuted suicide last night.
>instant fall to the ground. Unable to move
>half in shock, half realize she s 100% serious
>just cry harder than I ever had
>she drops down, but, nonstop crying.
>a few of her other friends find us
>we're given a room for just us.
>me and like 10 girls just fucking losing It.
>vice principal comes in, takes me to his office
>tells me about how his brother took his own life, we both cry.
>i cry for months on end, still do some times, like right now.
Couple days later funeral
>she played field hockey
>hand made a field hockey sick out of mahogany and had her other friends sign it
>told them give it to family bc I couldn't confront them
>know it's not my fault
>still feel extremely guilty, over a decade later.

Still think about offing myself every single day (not because of her)

>>37434912
>3am
>sipping whiskey while driving
>decided now was the time
>put my foot to the pedal
>got up to ~110 mph before I crashed into the guardrail, knocked unconscious by the force
>car totaled, no one injured
>cops wake me up, take me to hospital to be checked out
>I'm fine so they take me in to fingerprint/book me
>spend 2 days in county jail waiting for arraignment
>$10,000 bail, $5,000 bond
>father posts it for me
>house lockdown while awaiting trial/sentencing(not court mandated, my father told me I stay at home or go homeless)
>lawyer tells me to plead guilty, if I fight the charge I face up to 2 years in prison and a felony record
>gets a plea bargain to be reduced to misdemeanor/less jail time
>sentenced to 6 months in county jail and 1 year probation afterwards, $2000 fine, license suspended for 1 year, and breathlyzer in car(if I had one), and permanent criminal record(can't get DWI expunged in this state)

Now I just work a part time job, drinking every day, hoping I'll die any way possible

>>37439737
A co-worker i had back in 2013 committed suicide 4th of april, this year. He was pretty Chad and even fucked the manager and impregnated her a few years later. But for some reason he hanged himself.

My uncle's mother jumped in front of a train like a decade ago.

My cousin also hanged himself but it was like 20 years ago and i was too young to remember him.

My cousin's cousin also hanged himself a few years ago, but i only met him once when he was like 12 years old.

These were the ones i met personally, but i know of many more suicides in my neighborhood.

>>37440109
Fuck off normalfag
If jfjxkxjxlcv bsbkv sjsjzjz

>>37440397
What part of that was normal? The fact that I had 1 friend in 2nd grade? Or because an emotionally distraught girl hugged me because she knew we had a mutual friend that fucking hung herself in her closet while her mom picked her little sister up from a church thing.

You fuck off, wannabe edge Lord. Try harder next time.

>>37435600

i fucking wish that people would ask me if I'm ok every once and a while

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What is the most effective way to go about it? Gunshot to the head seems the best but on the off chance you fail you become a vegetable. Same can be said for gas and suffocation.

>>37440843
Jump off a tall building, 99.9% success rate

You'll have to be in a major city(NY,LA,Chicago) to make it happen

>>37435150
What if someone found you hanging and saved you before you died?

>>37439319
Do you not care that had you gone through with it, you would have horribly scarred some poor worker, who probably isn't wealthy at all but just works there? Does that not even give you the slightest moment of pause?

>>37439493
Nah, I know a vietnam vet who took a round from an SKS through his chest.

Sometimes the round tumbles, cavitates real big, and fucks everything up, sometimes it just pierces through with relatively minor damage in the surrounding tissue. Plenty of stories videos of people getting shot in the chest with AK's in syria and surviving.

A tokarev would also be a pretty fucking bad round to shoot yourself with too, considering it's so fast and light, it's just gonna do the same thing as a rifle bullet, either punch a clean-ish hole or tumble and shred everything.

>>37441009
No it doesn't. I don't really care. She doesn't have to look, all she'd see me doing is jumping off.

>>37440843
Jumping as ( >>37440865 ) said
Head on railroads (?)
Shotgun...most favourable imo.
>Sitting, back against wall
>position it under chin or so
>pull trigger

>>37441055
Thats still incredibly traumatizing, just because you're dissatisfied with your life doesn't mean you have a license to disregard others, take some agency and put your problems in your own hands instead of just shitting over people who never did anything to you, and see a counselor.

>>37434912
I feel the same way, but it was after I was recovering from both a grand mal seizure and psychotic mania. Even if it didn't kill me, a part of my soul died during that process.

>>37441135
If society and my surroundings gave me a means of killing myself in front of no one with no cost and no pain, I'd happily do it, but that's sadly not the case. Why should I ever worry about other people moments away from dying anyhow?

>>37434912
>>Feel like I am in some kind of purgatory that mimmics real life but is actually a special subtle kind of hell meant to torment me further.
i'm 27 and every day feels like this

>>37441179
Because you're a part of society, and whether or not you believe in an afterlife you have a subconscious mind that releases psychedelic chemicals at the time of death, do you really want the guilt of scarring someone with your suicide to be the last thing on your mind as you have the most intense experience of your life?

>>37441219
I'm older, and I also replied to that post.
It gets worse desu

>tfw you fell for the sleeping pills overdose meme

>>37440563
Show some concern but don't do it in a way that's so fucking condescending

>>37441424
The overdose stuff never works out. Unless it's some powerful drug or the nembutal meme.

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>>37441229
Not him but the guy is literally trying to kill himself. Why do you think he has any respect for others if he has absolutely zero respect for himself?

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>>37441311
>It gets worse desu
slowly or all at once?

>>37441424
what's wrong with this?
I was thinking of doing it

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>>37435012
>attempts to commit suicide by taking pills
>accidently redpill

>>37441642

It does if you do it right. A few bags of heroin in one shot with a few xanax or and a beer and you will stop breathing. Do it at night when you are alone and people are asleep and you are dead as dead can be.

>>37441654
Suicide is the highest form of respect. Ending your life in your own terms is alpha.

>>37442559
That's true desu, everyone says it's the "cowards way out" but i bet it's hard putting a shotgun in your mouth and pulling the trigger

>>37434912
You couldn't even kill yourself right? You officially can do nothing right you waste of space

>>37442628
It really isnt that hard when you truly dont have anything to lose.People who have things to lose would find it hard.

>>37436864
Just had some surgery. I know that constipation feel all to well

>>37439737
my dad did. AMA

>>37440996
hanging takes a MAX of 10 min if you royally fuck up so its virtually impossible for this scenario to happen unless you want it to i.e. seek attention

its in general impossible to fail a suicide unless you dont have internet to do even the smallest bit of research or just want attention

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>>37439049
introducing a quick, easy and relatively painless way to die the ol door knob hang all you have to do is slowly apply pressure till you pass out and gravity will do the rest

dont delay read up on it today at lostallhope dot com

>>37443306
You need to compress only the carotid arteries though. If you compress the jugular arteries it will feel like your head is going to explode and it will feel too uncomfortable to continue.

>>37442369
>Overdosing
Sometimes extremely painful
I wouldnt even consider it a 60% chance of working

>>37435102
>but he said no every time
yeaaahhh he didnt say anything because your talking to yourself, and you took that as a no.
ftfy

>>37436516
>Are you trying to sound smart?
it sounds like youre desperately trying to sound smart yourself