General chatting thread, final exam tomorrow edition. Hey /r9k/,

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I wasted my whole night browsing this shit board instead of playing video games I was looking forward to.

Hi normies anon, I want an advice on dealing with unfamiliar classroom or situation when you have to be in room with a lot of strangers.

>>37399634
How can I start talking to people on social meetings without coming off as creepy?

>>37399657
Aw, that's a shame, but there's always tomorrow night(:

>>37399700
Depends on the circumstances. If you're moving to a new school or something, then people will already have established friend groups, so I'm usually quite quiet and wait for people to start talking about something I know about before saying something along those lines. If everyone's new then everyone's out to make friends, so just sit next to anyone, talk to them about literally anything and you're set.

>>37399718
What sort of social meetings are these? Usually I just start talking to them, or maybe waiting a little bit to hear what they're talking about and then adding something to that conversation. Usually people are very friendly and receptive to new peeps, so in that case you'll have been "included in the circle", so at that point it's all good. Sometimes though they don't want to be disturbed by others, and that's fine as well - there's nothing weird or creepy in trying to talk to someone and then moving on to someone else if they're not very receptive.

>>37399866
My friends from high school would usually invite me for barbeques or house parties. I can't muster myself to really talk to someone besides them there. After some alcohol it's easier, but still uncomfortable.

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>>37400012
I mean, at those events literally everyone is open to talking to new people, so the problem isn't how to do it as much as you not feeling comfortable doing it. It's hard for me to relate because I'm a social butterfly who loves talking to new people, but generally alcohol is a great social lubricant. If I'm ever in a situation where I feel I might be a bit nervous like a date, I drink a pint or a few shots beforehand to take the edge off. Other than that it's just a matter of pushing past that nervousness and just going and talking to people - it gets easier the more you do it.

Hi, I have a situation to expose to you, I need an advice. I lost all my friends just before high school, I did high school home schooled.
Obviously, because of that my social skills are still at a pre-teen stage. Now, I could go to college next year, what should I do? My parents would accept to keep as a NEET but I need social contact so bad. I'm just afraid to do everything wrong because of all that time spent at home.

>>37400109
No worries man. I never had any friends in school and I was never invited out, so I was in a similar boat where I didn't really know how to talk to people. What helped me immensely was I got a job as a bartender, which forces you to talk to a ton of people every day. After that talking to anyone was the easiest thing. Alternatively you can just go straight into uni - everyone's new and everyone wants to make friends, so you actively have to try to not make any friends. This is a place where you can literally sit down with anyone and talk to them and they will be very eager to talk back, a place where everyone wants to constantly drink and go out with you and as many others as possible. I think you'd have to actively ignore all your housemates and tell them that you're not going out with them every time they invite you out, and do the same thing with your coursemates, club people, etc, to not end up with some friends. You'll be just fine.

I am too old to still be here.

The internet isn't fun anymore.

Modern games all feel like rehashes of old shit I've already played.

The WWII theme coming back in vogue makes me smirk, because I remember sinking more time than I should have in high school into BF1942, and how fresh the modern warfare series felt.

My career has barely started, I'm not even two years into my first salaried job and I feel trapped. I keep thinking 10 steps in the future and not seeing how to get there.

I get paralysed by the thought of how hard it is to study, and end up shitposting.

I get overwhelmed by the choices in vidya I have, and end up shitposting.

I hate myself because I don't do anything to improve my situation, and have some retarded hope that in the "future" I'll be different.

I don't even remember what thread I'm posting in. I just wanted a vent.

>>37400201
That's fair man, I understand your frustrations. What do you want to be doing with your life? Keep in mind that "just chilling and playing vidya" is a perfectly valid answer(:

>>37400221
Move into infosec and have a career that fulfills me. That is my true goal.

>>37400174
Thanks man, I'll try to get a job like that during this summer, it may be a good idea.

>>37399634
How do I accept do have flaws? Every time I notice some imperfection on my body or in my work I feel like everybody will see it as much as I can and destroy me because of that.
It makes me whiny and dysfunctional, my parents are sick of me. I can't do anything until I feel perfect.

>>37400269
It's good to have a goal that you strive towards. What kind of steps would you need to take to get there?

>>37400279
Yeah, it's helpful, plus the money's always nice. I wouldn't keep it once you actually get to uni though, since not being available a lot of the time is a big negative in making new friends.

>>37400311
There are two main parts to this. Firstly everyone has flaws, so you're not alone in that. I have my fair share of flaws, but I know that the rest of me outshines my flaws, as is the case with everyone. Secondly, people are far too preoccupied with their own flaws to care about yours. When was the last time you saw someone and thought "Oh, they're a bit too short, I never want to talk to this person" or something along those lines?

>>37400355
>It's good to have a goal that you strive towards
I don't. I sit and wish it would happen while I refresh this cesspool and sometimes play games from the early 2000s.

>What kind of steps would you need to take to get there?
Study. Get certificates in the field. Move away from this shitty town and into the countries capital, where this shit is exploding.

>>37400422
Well, what's stopping you from sitting down and starting this process? You might think that it's too late, but the truth is in a year's time you'll either be thinking "Oh, I wish I started this a year ago" or "Man, am I glad I started doing stuff a year ago". Note that this is a recursive thought, which means that it's pretty much never too late to start trying to achieve your goal (unless you're like 80 or something).

>>37400418
Last time was in uni, I was talking to this girl who was by accident next to me, I felt like this way too good for me and started shaking. She made a remark about it.
I have been obsessed by this episode during days and things got worse. The irony is that I was shaking because of my flaws.

>>37400548
>Well, what's stopping you from sitting down and starting this process?
It's hard. I can't get motivated. I procrastinate and just put it off. I'll go into my lab and say I'll study and just end up here instead. Then I feel worse for not studying, and feel less in the mood to do it because I feel like shit for not doing it.

>>37400582
she was way too good*

>>37400582
Yeah, but the girl was still talking to you, wasn't she? Back at the start of first year I spilled my spaghetti with this girl I was sitting next to, but the next time I sat next to her anyway and kept talking, and it was completely fine. Especially in university, people want to talk to you and they want to make new friends - they really don't care enough about flaws and weird quirks, so you'll be just fine if you try to talk to people.

>>37400625
Good people have flaws too, and people don't really classify others into "tiers". This girl I used to date had everything - she was funny, really cute and incredibly smart (she ended up doing a PhD in Oxford), but she was ridiculously insecure about the smallest things. Nearly all people won't think that you're beneath them or anything, and if they do, then they're not exactly nice people and they're really not worth hanging out with.

Hello Norman, I live for the one day a week I can get drunk but I don't even enjoy that anymore. I enjoy me work to a certain extent but still dread going in. I feel depressed and without energy all the time and so I tend to eat junk through apathy, lack of energy and for comfort. Even if I sort my diet, the alcohol nevertheless keeps me dumpy. The thing is, without that once a week binge I don't know how I'd get through the week. I have a gf I live with btw. I've been in shape before, but not for years. I'd like to get back there but I also know it wouldn't stop me being depressed though it would likely help my interactions and confidence.

>>37400622
That's fair enough, I can understand not being motivated and feeling bad about it. The key is to think of each day as a new day with a fresh start, so if you didn't do enough yesterday, that's fine, just do something, literally anything, today and you'll be fine. If that doesn't work, then apply the same logic tomorrow and at some point just make sure that you do something. Remember that that's the hardest step - once you start doing something it's a lot easier to continue doing it.

>>37400708
Depression's a bitch. Instead of tackling the symptoms, I'd go see a doctor about your depression and try to sort that out first, though I know that's easier said than done. It's helped me a ton though when I was feeling incredibly low, and once you've done it it's nice to always have that as a backup - "if I do start feeling bad, I can always go to a doctor again and deal with it, so I needn't be worried".

>>37400767
If by 'deal with it' you mean meds, it's not been very helpful in the past. I'm in therapy though. Twice a week, in fact.

>>37400816
Yeah, SSRIs pretty much. How comes they've not been helping you? And that's fair, how's therapy coming along? Meds worked a bit too well for me, so I couldn't do therapy since I was doing too well so they kicked me out.

>>37400680
I wish I had your courage at the time, I avoided her the next week after that. She look at me as the worst coward she ever met since. Took me a week to process it was a mistake,she was popular and her friends imitate her.
You're right, I could have fix it but it's always like that, it's all fine if everything goes the way I want, however if something not completely planned happens, I run away.
Makes me regret the last three years of my life, how many situations like that could I have fixed?

>>37400847
I'm in group therapy which is useful because it's more people to bounce ideas off and I can work through my issues with my parents especially. The other therapist is relatively recent and extremely expensive but it's to deal with my more acute symptoms.

>>37400852
The key isn't to think about the past and what you could have done, it's to think about the future and what you could do now to help yourself. There's nothing stopping you from talking to this girl again, she honestly won't mind you coming up to her again and chatting with her, and there's no real cut-off point for that, but if you're really not feeling it, that's cool, you can just talk to other people instead. I get being intimidated by her friends, but they're just regular people with regular thoughts. The worst case scenario is that you won't have all that much in common and won't be able to really talk about anything, but that's fine, because in that situation you know you tried and it just wasn't going to work out anyway. As for courage - it's always hard the first few times, but it gets significantly easier and less daunting after you've tried it a few times. Good luck anon(:

>>37400880
Yeah that's fair. I'm sorry I can't really help out here, I've never been in this kinda situation and I can't relate, but hope it's going alright, at least(:

>>37400174

What do I do if they won't invite me out? Like every time I make friends they never invite me out to do anything, Like not just partying they won't even hit me up to go to a movie or even just hang out. I always know that they're doing stuff too because they talk about it when I'm not around. It's been like this since middle school, am I just stupid or does no one like me??

>>37400985
Well, thanks anyway I guess. I suppose it's quite a normie-exclusionary scenario

>>37400985
I'll do my best to pass the first few times like you then. Thanks mate, you give hope.

Hey everyone, sorry I need to run off now, but I do have an exam tomorrow and this is taking up a significant amount of time, so I can't really keep up answering people. Apologies to everyone and good luck to you all(:

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>>37399634
I'm 26. No degree, don't have a job, balding and thinking about suicide. I'm taking a course (not uni) so I can maybe find some work. I'm just doing it so I feel less like a waste, but tbqh, I feel like my time has passed. It was wasted away on vydia and 4chan. My fault, mostly. I would't get panic attacks here on 4chan, but I would get them while walking into a supermarket or preseting something in front of the class, so this was a nice escape.

When I say things like "tfw no gf", I'm just baiting or shitposting, because having a gf feels like a distant dream. How could I ever be so foolish to think that I could stand a chance?

Its a normie world out there, and don't let people tell you otherwise.

>>37401284
>I feel like my time has passed
This is commonly referred to as a quarter life crisis

Please have a think about what that means, what it implies and what you can extrapolate from it.

I'm happy to live in a small town that doesn't have the meme life yall get. Looking at the front page and seeing Chad's, sluts, neets, and traffic memes and I can't relate to any of it. Because it seems frustrating.