would u read this

>>37374508
Sounds like a boring story.

Zing original

>>37374508
Did you crosspost this troll to /lit/? Feels like you're trying to kill two birds with one stone here.

Why? So she can sort her life out, call the robot her best friend, then marry Chad? Absolutely not.

>>37374624
yes, she's supposed to end up with chad and the robot dies.

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P O S T Y O U R D A M N E D U D D E R S
you meatflaps

>>37374643
What an awful story. The literary equivalent of a snuff film.

>>37374655
how is it awful? the robot's life had no meaning and he did something good before he killed himself

>>37374508
>I'm a girl
tits and gtfo

>>37374804
no i want opinions please

>>37374901
in my opinion the story you've described sounds unbelievably shitty. i wouldn't read it if you paid me, now fuck off.

>>37375158
it's supposed to be a happy ending though

>wants to kill himself
>stays alive to help someone who he knows is obviously not interested in him fuck someone else
he probably wants to kill himself because of his """oneitis""", I'd say it's unrealistic at best and a literal cuck fantasy at worst.

I don't consume fictional media any more because I keep developing feelings for fictional women and it probably isn't healthy.

>>37375227
i didnt say it was supposed to be realistic
and plus she will develop some feelings for him but ultimately choose chad because the robot is too bitter

>>37374508
>I'm a girl
Hey girl
>I want to write a story/novella(?).
HEYYYYY
>Would you read a story about a cyborg/almost robot who wants to kill himself but puts killing himself on hold so he can help his oneitis out with her problems?
Allow me to explain stories. What makes someone read a story is a hook. You need to have something interesting happen from that escalates to a climax.
I think it would be a cute climax for them to get married instead of die.
>She has abusive parents, has no friends and she really wants this Chad kinda guy that doesn't really notice her.
Is this a self-insert? WHO DIES

>>37375347
>talk about writing
>butcher the English language
English dies

>>37375347
its about two sad ppl, a failed normie girl and a cyborg

the cyborg/robot kills himself in the end

>>37375408
Your story has a painfully predictable story arc. People read fiction to /escape/ reality.
Make it about a knight of the round table who must never reveal who he is and rides around on a magic talking duck.

>>37375464
no, the predictable story would be the cyborg and the girl ending up together


it's hard to come up with something innovative/high concept so i just wanted to write something simple and cute

>>37375503
Still predictable

>>37375503
You think you're so cute killing off your main characters? That's the first thing that a lot of people will expect. If you really want to write about that, you could probably actually interview people that know guys that died like that and publish the interviews for public awareness. That's raw. I'd read the shit out of that.
You can still sort of use your original idea, but just make the talking duck kill himself. The twist is that the duck was in love with the princess.

>>37374508
stop imaginin horror stories stacey and get the fuck out

>>37375561
Man, this is a really great idea. The duck could have a snazzy pair of glasses and a great smile, and crack all sorts of jokes.

Sounds boring. Writing a story about John Podesta would be more fun to read.

>>37375561
i dont get it. who is the talking duck?

>>37375647
The talking duck is the knight's main mode of transportation.

>>37375660
I WANT TO WRITE ABOUT HUMANS
what's a twist i can put in my original idea?

>>37375684
So, your story goes roughly like this.
Princess Cumdumpster (Stacy) gets anally raped by King Niggerdick as a punishment for defying his sexual monarchy. Her most recent painful orgasming scream falls on the ears of our hero:
LONERGRIN, the white knight. (Chad)
He plays a flute made out of skin to summon his trusty steed, a magic motherfucking duck.
They bantz for a bit and then go to find the princess being anally raped, as usual. Lonergrin challenges Niggerdick to Mortal Kombat, which he wins by offering the king a $1200 watch, causing the king to immediately die of embarrassment.
After the king dies, his kingdom quickly falls apart without him holding the reigns, and the economy gets really bad. Lonergrin reveals his name and then peaces out on his duck. The princess almost dies of starvation, so the duck comes back and commits a l'orange so that she can live.
THE END

>>37375684
Chad is gay, robot becomes gay and gets with Chad. Roastie kills herself.

>>37375870
no, i want it to be a realistic ya-ish story
>>37375889
that's sad. it has to appeal to mainly women so FMC must live

>>37375960
>she doesn't believe in talking ducks
tits or gtfo

what about a story where a cyborg's mom gets married and he has a new pretty stepsister that hates him? ive always wanted to write a story like this, it's so cute

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>>37375960
Fucking rostie, are you geesephobic or something
Show some de m udders to redeem yourself

>>37376280
no, help me with a good twist so i can write something good

>>37376693
help me with a good fap so that I can stop trolling you and give a useful answer

>>37376693
First some titties
then some twistties

>>37376811
no, just help please
i want to write a page turner

>>37374643
a story that represents real life? that sucks, nice stories are supposed to do exactly the opposite of that, take the reader away from this living hell and into a world outside reality