GET OUT NOW!

Yeah, I can stay! please, kill me

failed normies make up 90% of the board now

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>>37348191
>>37348208
G E T
T H E
F U C K
O U T
R I G H T
F U C K I N G
N O W

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>>37348263
Dude vagina feels goodman


I don't even give a freaking heck

>>37348263
nah I like it here desu

>>37347990
>Are a faggot.

Seriously. This is a straight board for robots that have tfw nogf, Take your faggot shit the fuck off this board. You have a whole board dedicated to being a faggot, and if that isn't good enough for you. You can also post on /b/. You cockfags need to stop shitting up our board.

>>37348401
Why not just fuck off to wizardchan?

>>37347990
I'm 10/14 what do I win? Can I stay?

>>37348419
Why not just go to your own board instead of shitting up ours? Faggots are male Stacey's. They aren't robots.

There is nothing remotely similar between the lifestyle of a skinny twink that can log onto grindr and get offers of dick from a dozen guys in 10 minutes, and a khv that spends all his time alone in his room playing vidya and having no friends.

Lel le straigth board is it yes ? i think ill be gay over here /lgbt/ is just to annoying, btw 11 points apply to me, you mad bro ?

>>37348263
You get out you /b/ raid leftover

>>37348579
Why not go be a faggot on /bant/?

Or reddit. Or fucking tumblr. Or anywhere else.

>>37348561
lolsoangry, you mad that you cant get dick for yourself ?

btw the "Straigth board" has a thread about bellyposting -> yeah straigth sure

>>37347990

>kissed a girl
I'm 19..... It's only obvious. First kiss was at age of 12 and I can't remember how many girls I kissed by now.
>had sex
Well duh I'm 19 come on...
30+ different woman so far.
>have(had) a gf
Have GF now
>own a car
Nope, too expensive here for a 19 year old.
>went to prom
Yeah, was shitty though could have saved money by not going
>danced with a girl(not your mom)
Obviously
>have a full time job
Nope, uni is long tho
>own a home or rent apartment
I rent a room, Studentlife
>handsome face
This applies to me
>athletic body
Meh, I'm alright but nothing special
>plays sports
Football (soccer)
>have talents praised by normies
Not really no, I am great at math and learn fast.
>have a resume
Only a part time supermarket job and uni degree which I'm currently doing
>have trust fund
I have an investment account in Denmark/Norway at Skagen.

Rate?

>>37348609
Probably your thread. /r9k/ is plagued by fag cancer.

Why would I be mad I can't gwt dick I don't want? Ugh. Thats disgusting. Kys

>>37348630
Fuck off / 20

>>37348679
Are you jelly?

>>37348687
fuck off my board, chad your kind is not welcome here REEEEEEEE

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>>37348649
you're the original cancer

>>37347990
>kissed a girl
>danced with a girl(not your mom)
now i sit inside and fap to scat femdom and get turned on by thoughts of killing myself. can i stay?

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GET THE FUCK OUT OFF THIS BOARD!!!!
ROBOT UPRISING BEGINS NOW!
THIS BOARD BELONGS TO THE AUTISTIC VIRGIN NEETS! NORMIES NEED TO GO BACK TO THEIR JOBS AND GF'S

GET
OUT
NOW
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

I have a trust fund, and a decently handsome face. Can I still be a robot? I have not done anything else.

>>37347990
i own a car but it was given me by my grandma (the best nana in the world, 95 and still kickin)
does it count?

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>>37347990
I kissed my aunt when I was 12 desu

If any of the following applies to you you need to kill yourself right now
>thinks "robots" are real
>thinks "chads" are real
>thinks "stacys" are real
>thinks r9k is for autistic neets and not greentext stories

>>37349313
go greentext on /b/ faggot

>>37347990
>meet all of these
>am also a female
You forgot "makes over X amount"

I've done all of these.

However, I act the way this board requires me to. I respect the culture and way of this place. I post like a true robot and act like one

>>37349675
>I act the way this board requires me to
it's not a matter of act, it's a matter of being. You cannot pretend to be a robot, you're born one

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>>37347990
oh come on
i only went to prom (was drunk though)
let me stay guys i got nowhere to go

>>37349675
>I've done all of these.
so get the fuck out

>>37347990
>kissed a girl
yes
>had sex
yes
>have(had) a gf
yes
>own a car
no
>went to prom
no
>danced with a girl(not your mom)
yes
>have a full time job
no
>own a home or rent apartment
no
>handsome face
average
>athletic body
working on it
>plays sports
weightlifting
>have talents praised by normies
used to
>have a resume
an empty one
>have trust fund
no

>>37347990
What if I did all those things but while drunk?

>>37350789
>>37350806
so what are you doing on this board?
why don't you go to /b/, facebook or reddit where you can meet people like you?
Why do you come to the board that was built by social outcasts? You might as well go to a special ed class and pretend you're one of them

>>37347990I agree with you OP, but you should add >not social awkward or >is extroverted. I know(not my friends of course) people that did not do none of those, but are extremely good in social situations while not being handsome, and they have tons of friends.

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>>37347990
I have none of these and I'm fine with it.

>>37347990
i've got all of those but a trust fund and a house (but im moving out in a month)

soz ;(

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>>37347990
>yes
>no
>yes
>yes
>no
>no
>yes
>yes
>no
>no
>no
>no
>not an up to date one
>no
Make me leave faggots

>>37347990
>maybe as a kid idk
>nope
>nope
>mom bought me one but it broke down after 2 months
>nope, spendt prom night playing diablo 2
>only in school when we practiced swing dancing, didn't have much of a choice
>never
>I help mom pay rent but never had my own place
>maybe if my nose and chin wasn't so pointy
>just skinny
>I hate sports
>no talents
>no
>I dont even know what that is

you forgot
>neurotypical
>had friendships outside of school
>wasn't bullied
>had a good childhood

>>37347990

>>kissed a girl
Yes, only one though

>>had sex
Yes, only with one girl though

>>have(had) a gf
Yes, my current is the only one I've ever had, and I had to wait until I was 24

>>own a car
I lease. My old man negotiates the monthly payments, because he bargains like a diamond district Jew.

>>went to prom
Oh dear me, no.

>>danced with a girl(not your mom)
Can't dance properly, but yes

>>have a full time job
I work fulltime hours, but get no full time benefits because my boss illegally employs me as an independent contractor when I don't fit the description. But I do get 3 hours a day of minimum work alone time for shit posting before the on air shift begins (board op work, radio show producer/booker, assistant program director, etc.)

>>own a home or rent apartment
I still live with my parents. I guess I could move but I don't see a reason why.

>>handsome face
I don't believe so, but at least it gets less round as I get older.

>>athletic body
I'm flabby as shit, but I got some muscle on me.

>>plays sports
Nope. Only lift.

>>have talents praised by normies
People think working in radio takes skill. I really just chop up audio in Cool Edit and know what buttons to press.

>>have a resume
Yup, I've had like nine jobs and two college degrees. I only list four or five of them.

>>have trust fund
I wish.

>>37347990
I went to prom, but was all alone for the whole night. Does that count?

>>37347990
>have trust fund

sorry for only leaching off my parents and not the tax payer

>>37347990
>no to all of these
sigh.

>>37347990

>kissed a girl yes
>had sex yes
>have(had) a gf yes
>own a car yes, two
>went to prom no because straya
>danced with a girl(not your mom) yes
>have a full time job yes
>own a home or rent apartment own a home
>handsome face yes
>athletic body no
>plays sports no
>have talents praised by normies yes
>have a resume yes
>have trust fund yes

should I gtfo?

>>37351279
>should I gtfo?
yes
just head to /b/ or something

>>37347990
>>kissed a girl
no, didnt kiss the prostitute so im still 26 and kissless
>>had sex
only with prostitutes (2, not at the same time)
>>have(had) a gf
never
>>own a car
yea
>>went to prom
alone and i cringe to this day for even having gone
>>danced with a girl(not your mom)
yea
>>have a full time job
yea
>>own a home or rent apartment
no
>>handsome face
no
>>athletic body
no
>>plays sports
no
>>have talents praised by normies
for whatever reason the normans tell me im smart at every job ive had (3)
>>have a resume
yea. i lie on it and havent been caught but when i do get caught i wont give a fuck
>>have trust fund
no

I don't have a trust fund, and I didn't go to prom. So, I've only got 12/14. Can I stay?

>>37347990
Mfw literally nothing

member when arcanine was for cool content and not filled with omega anger

>>37350852
maybe you took my post the wrong way: I have a serious substance abuse problem and cannot interact with people unless I'm drunk or in some way fucked up

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>>37347990
I'm kind of sad to say none of these apply to me.
Feelsbadman

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>kissed a girl
Yes, many
>had sex
Never
>have(had) a gf
Does a month of dating but never officially being a couple counts?
>own a car
Fuck no, I'm scared to drive
>went to prom
Nope
>danced with a girl(not your mom)
Yeah, a few times, but I didn't like it
>have a full time job
Yep
>own a home or rent apartment
Nah
>handsome face
Not sure
>athletic body
No, but not fat either
>plays sports
Very, very rarely
>have talents praised by normies
HAD
>have a resume
Yeah
>have trust fund
What?

I'm just a failed normie

>kissed a girl
Yes
>had sex
Yes
>have(had) a gf
Yes, had
>own a car
Yes, but it cost me $200
>went to prom
No prom here in Aus
>danced with a girl(not your mom)
Yup
>have a full time job
Part-time, 4 days a week
>own a home or rent apartment
Kek no. Live at home in basement
>handsome face
Nope, average as fuck
>athletic body
Chubby
>plays sports
Nope
>have talents praised by Normies
Blackbelt for 5yrs now
>have a resume
Yup
>have trust fund
Kek no

>>37351463
>I have a serious substance abuse problem
that's your own fault, you're not a robot by choice

i have a car, job, had sex before and had a girlfriend.

but my PTSD fucked everything up and now I have to get hammered every night and fap because I cant even find girls on fucking dating apps

>Yes, two
>Yes, one
>Married
>Three
>Did not attend
>Danced with wife at wedding
>Yes
>Caregiving a family member so no rent
>Nope
>Fat
>No
>Probably
>Yeah
>No

But I feel like a robot on the inside so you cant judge me #transacceptance

>>37351721
No I was just born to alcoholics and grew up around drugs, I guess technically it was all my choice

>kissed a girl
>had sex
>have(had) a gf
I had a gf once. She was abusive and wouldn't sex me bc I'm a beta cuck. She was an attention whore and made me stop playing video games when she was sad. She tried to kill herself 3 times while we were dating. I stoped her twice by telling her mom and then both of them got mad at me. She was also very religious but the pick and choose kind and that made me mad. Anyways, she crushed on and flirted with every other guy and always told me it was just her personality. She was the perfect kind of chubby with massive tits. She broke up with me after a little more that 3 months. She if fine now and I am a depressed loser who wants to die. She had sex with like 3 guys over the next two weeks. I am only attracted to skinny small tits now because I am to afraid of her. To autistic, social retarded and emotionless to do anything but have arguments, even with my few friends.
>own a car
Yes. Parents are rich.
>went to prom
Was forced by mom, so I asked a dude that left the school in junior year.
>danced with a girl(not your mom)
The previously mentioned gf who destroyed my life.
>have a full time job
Collage(doesn't really count)
>own a home or rent apartment
No.
>handsome face
Not ugly, but definitely not handsome. Head is a fucking sphere.
>athletic body
No, very flexible though, see below.
>plays sports
I did. Got my third degree blackbelt because I am a weeb
>have talents praised by normies
Very good at arguments, math, programming and logic problems. Don't think these are praised.
>have a resume
School made us for an English assignment
>have trust fund
My parents might be rich, but definitely not.

I'm not full robot, but I'm definitely not normie. I made teachers cry in school because I yelled at them.

>>37347990
>own a car

Fuck off, /comfy/ nightdrives are neat. i agree w/ the rest though.

>>37347990
like... out of the house bro? cause yeah, i'm meeting my gf for a coffee and carrot cake later at this central coffee shop. it's a bit on the expensive side but that's ok, i like spending money when I'm with her, even though she doesn't want me too.

it's weird because I very stingy with my money usually, and she doesn't want me to spend money on her, she always pays me back, but when I'm with her I don't really think about money.

well, have a good one man

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>>37347990
No to everything but face im an 8/10 pls let me stay

>>37347990
>have a resume
This is the only one I have. Fucking call me a normie, I fucking dare you.

>>37347990
The only ones I got were:
>own a car
>have a full time job
>plays sports
>have a resume

I'm pretty sure I can stay.

>>37351721
Don't act like you're not a robot by choice too anon

>>37347990

>went to prom (alone though)

>Have kissed (although it was only because a drunk chick got dared to kiss me on the cheek so i turned my head around to get the most out of this opportunity)

Can I stay?

>>37347990
What if the only thing that applies is that I'm athletic, but I have birthing hips and gyno?

>>37347990
from all this list I have an old 1990s car. now I go from here?

>>37347990
>kissed a girl
Yes
>had sex
Last time was last night
>have(had) a gf
Yes
>own a car
Indeed
>went to prom
Skipped the first one, went to senior
>danced with a girl(not your mom)
Yes, ballroom, swing, and my favorite; the horizontal tango
>have a full time job
Yes, but fuck working jobs without a proper education
>own a home or rent apartment
Not right now, currently in the market and trying to find a place by August
>handsome face
Absolutely, and one perfect dimple
>athletic body
Moderately. Don't work out so a little chubby, but barely anything worth noting
>plays sports
It's all about lacrosse
>have talents praised by normies
Been called a good kisser(don't know if that counts) play tenor sax, I get complimented on my personality and intelligence
>have a resume
Fucking since I was 15
>have trust fund
No because my parents aren't douche bags


It's easy to live when you're dead inside

>>37347990
I'm still here. What are you going to do about it bitch? And the best part is, I've made 100% true posts about my life and other robots have called me a true robot and said my threads are the type of threads that need to be posted on /r9k/. Suck my dick you ugly mother fucker

>>37347990

>own a car
>went to prom (alone and I completely embarrassed myself,worst day of my life)
>danced with a girl (also embarrassed myself)
>handsome face (at least by my own standards)
>have trust fund

I'm not a normie tough go fuck yourself

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>the only one I check is the fact that I have a car

C-can I stay, guys?

I went to prom with balloon with a face drawn on, because I'm a social masochistic and stopped give a fuck years ago. Guess I'm a normie see you nerds.

>>37347990
>not depressed
>rich
>parents love you
>had a happy childhood
>never had suicidal thoughts
>never were depressed longer than 6 months
>had hugged a girl (not your mom)
>had held hands with a girl (not your mom)
>have friends (online friends count!)
>have ever won a prize or an award (includes lotteries, raffles, etc.)
>have a master's degree or higher
>don't like or relate to any mass murderers or school shooters
>had high apgar score (9 or better)
>have little to no genetic defects

Atleast I get to stay ;_;
normies get out, please
you only make our lives harder.

>>37353408
>What are you going to do about it bitch?

Nothing, because I am a robot, not a self-pitying failed normie like you.

>>37349313

All of 4chan is for autistic neets

>/a/ is for autistic neet weebs
>/b/ was for autistic neet pedos before the normies swarmed over
>/c/ is for autistic neet weebs discussing their wifus
>/biz/ is for autistic neet weebs that invested their neetbux in cryptos
>/pol/ is for autistic neets that blame foreigners for everything
>/mlp/ is for autistic neet bronies
>/toy/ is for autistic neets sharing pictures of their anime figures
>/v/ is the place for autistic neets to discuss their only hobby
>/lgbt/ is for autists that are too far gone and thought that transitioning is a solution to their social failures.
>/fit/ is for autistic neets that are self conscious about their 2% body fat and think they'll never get a woman unless they reduce it.
>/fa/ is for autistic neets that think just looking like a normalfag is enough to be one
>/int/ is for autistic weebs that think they'll be accepted by japs just because they know some japanese words.

I can't be going through the rest, you get the idea.

I have a full time job but none of the other things. And I've been friendless for about seven years.

>>37353529

I can't be bothered going through the rest*
Sorry about that.

>>37349919

You had a chance and you blew it.

The rest of us never had a chance.

>>37347990
8/14. What's a trust fund ?

>>37347990
haha I've done/have most of these, I even have a kid!

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>>37348561
>implying most of the fags here aren't ugly as shit

>>37347990
>>kissed a girl
two actually, one on a dare and the other was drunk
>>had sex
yes but not sure she remembers
>>have(had) a gf
nope and no prospects
>>own a car
I do, an old one my grandma gave me
>>went to prom
nope, no one to ask
>>danced with a girl(not your mom)
I did a few times when they made us in gym class
>>have a full time job
Yes or I wouldn't eat
>>own a home or rent apartment
Rent a shit hole but all I can afford
>>handsome face
Some say yes
>>athletic body
Bio father was a god and I was blessed though on the skinny side and cover up with big T shirts
>>plays sports
Tried at 10 but broke my leg
>>have talents praised by normies
I'm really smart and can make my eyes shake that kinda freaks people out
>>have a resume
Yep
>>have trust fund
Sure, don't everybody that was raised in a trailer park

>>37347990
Please let me back. This board is all I have now. I promise I'll never get another gf.

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>>37348270
get the fuck out of here normie, go back to kikebook and learn how to steal memes while you're at it. REEEEEEEE

>>37353672

>yes but not sure she remembers

...

please sir do elaborate. i mean. what the fuck.

>>37347990
>kissed a girl
no
>had sex
no
>have(had) a gf
no
>own a car
no
>went to prom
no
>danced with a girl(not your mom)
when I was 9 at summer camp, forced of course
>have a full time job
no
>own a home or rent apartment
nope
>handsome face
hahaha
>athletic body
no
>plays sports
working out, not helping much though
>have talents praised by normies
"ur smart anon" fucking high school history class tier knowledge
>have a resume
yup, so empty that no employers acknowledge me
>have trust fund
this shit right here, rich kids need to leave. you have no real problems fucking cunts

>>37348630
fuck off my god damn board/20

>>37353950
School friend convinced me to go hang out at a party and spent most of it leaning against the wall with my head down. There were these two drunk girls, a fat one and a skinny one with green hair that was really cute but the fat one kept running off any chad that sniffed around green haired girl. The night wore on, the chads thinned out and my friend started messing with the fat one as the green haired girl stumbled outside and I followed. She turned around quickly, threw her arms around my shoulders and asked if I had anything to drink (I didn't) I kinda stumble/shuffled her to a chaise and she suddenly kissed me and pulled be on top of her. There were other people passing buy and started to taunt me to "fuck that pussy" so I did and she fucked back. I tried to be nice and hang with her after but she jumped up, pulled her panties up and went inside. I saw her with some other guy a little later and it bothered me but oh well, I had sex.

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>>37347990
>kissed a girl
yes, but never initiated
>had sex
nope
>had a gf
nope
>own a car
nope
>went to prom
No, but my prom was on my 18th birthday and I spent it with my crush (nothing came of it tho)
>danced with a girl (not your mom)
yes
>have a full time job
no
>own house/rent apartment
nope
>handsome face
I think so
>athletic body
Working on it, feel like I have a good build for it
>plays sports
no
>have talents praised by normies
yea
>resume
nope
>trust fund
nope

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>tfw you ended up being a such a failure that you can't be a robot or a normie
I don't belong anywhere

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>>37347990

>>kissed a girl
Ding
>>had sex
Ding
>>have(had) a gf
Ding
>>own a car
Ding
>>went to prom
Ding
>>danced with a girl(not your mom)
Ding
>>have a full time job
Ding
>>own a home or rent apartment
Ding
>>handsome face
Buzz
>>athletic body
Buzz
>>plays sports
Byzz
>>have talents praised by normies
Buzz
>>have a resume
Ding
>>have trust fund
Buzz


Guess what friendo? I am not going anywhere.

>>37347990
Almost nothing applies to me on the list.
I did dance with a girl, but it was more like formal thing.
But Im not a robot. More like the virginest normie ever.

I didnt leave my bedroom for an entire year, literally interacting with no one but my family and internet people. I call it my year of darkness. I understand what it's like to belong here, but alas, it's true I probably don't.

>kissed a girl
Aged 5 first kiss
>had sex
Age 16
>have(had) a gf
Age 16/17
>own a car
Grandmother died and left it to me. Age 17
>went to prom
Took gf
>danced with a girl(not your mom)
I love to lead a girl in dance, definitely one of the most fun things
>have a full time job
Naw, only ever casual work
>own a home or rent apartment
Naw, sharehouse with friends who most certainly do belong here
>handsome face
Ace jawline, full lips, nose is a tad big but
>athletic body
Been eating like a hippo my entire life and literally always been 17-18 bmi
>plays sports
I swim 3 days a week...
>have talents praised by normies
IQ tested at ages 8/16 and a couple weeks ago at 24. Scored 141/137/134
>have a resume
Have one, but Im well connected with Freemasons so Ive always been able to find work through reputation
>have trust fund
Nope

>I'm not a robot

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>>37347990
>>kissed a girl
Many.
>>had sex
Last Weekend.
>>have(had) a gf
Had 1
>>own a car
Own 2
>>went to prom
Nah, fuck that.
>>danced with a girl(not your mom)
Ofc.
>>have a full time job
Yup.
>>own a home or rent apartment
About to buy my own place.
>>handsome face
Check.
>>athletic body
Yup.
>>plays sports
Yeah.
>>have talents praised by normies
Does cunnilingus count?
>>have a resume
Yes.
>>have trust fund
Nope, no trust fund baby.

Now fyte me, faggot OP.

>>37355189

Post face. Someone so confident surely has nothing to fear or hide from a bunch of frogs right?

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>>37347990
No you need to get out if you score above 75% on the is my life shit quiz

http://www.ratemylife.net

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>>37355322
Not posting face.

But people tell me i look like this dude.

>>37347990
I have a resume. I went stag to prom.

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>own a car
>have talents praised by normies
Feels good to be the top dog, see you later loosers!

>>37347990
bye everybody!

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>>37355409
43, kind of sad I actually belong desu