To have loved and lost it. Or to have never loved at all?

The first one. It teaches you important things about the natural fallibility of human connection and how most long-term relationships are simply perpetuated by cultural forces and fear/anxiety/dependency.

The latter just makes you a cynical fuck.

>>37327154
I knew loved and lost it but i'm still a cynical fuck :(

Loved and lost, definitely
No love at all is bad constantly, sure break up hurts but you get over it in time.
And at least you know someone is capable of loving you and chances are you might find someone else

Plus if I finally get my heart broken, it might help me kill myself.

>>37327208
What if people wont ever be capable of loving you? What if it was just mere stupid luck that happened to you once or maybe twice? You wont ever get to experience a blessing like that again but still know what you miss for the rest of your lonely life?

have a cute gf to get all the sex and gay shit out of your system and i think it'd be much easier to live with yourself after it ends.

i feel like if i'd been there done that i'd either realize it's not worth it first hand or at least be content that i'd been there and done that.

>>37327250
If someone loved once, chances are it will happen again
And we are not talking about simply relationships, but ones with love.
Also I don't need to have felt love to know what I am missing out on, all the hours spent daydreaming about a gf have made my imagination feel realistic-ish

>>37327291
I think my definition of love has always been one way, me loving the other person. I have never been loved myself, well maybe by my parents but thats only natural.

I am a bit sad because I know i'm not the type of person that can experience stuff like this or make it happen while deep down in side we all need a soulmate. It's just the curse of being an autistic fuck. When you are alone you wish you were together and when you are together you want to be alone. Also I never get in situations where I can meet anyone anymore and i'm too pussy to do it out in the open whenever a chance shows itself.

>>37327097
My one and only girlfriend committed suicide and I miss her everyday. It's always on my mind eating at me, I wish it would stop but at the same time this emotional baggage is all I have left of her. That may sound edgy but it's how I feel. I don't know OP, I honestly couldn't answer that for you.

>>37327335
Share the story if you wish

>>37327325
I know the feeling all too well. Sometimes I imagine the tender moments I would share with a loved one, but quickly realise that a relationship isn't really feasible so I'll never really get the opportunity for those things to happen.

>>37327360
Yup, it's all in your imagination.

We just don't have the brain for it or the personality I guess. Only in my dreams it seems. But in real life, some people are just meant to be alone I guess. If only i'd be easier to accept.

>>37327325
I liked being alone, till one day it just hit me that I hate it.
All these years of parental neglect, lack of friends and love in general have given me huge capacity for love. Im just afraid that
>no one's gonna love you nearly as much as you love them
I don't want to be taken for granted

>>37327291
I had a gf when I was a teenager and now I'm 25 and the closest I've gotten since was being asked for my facebook by a girl who had a nearly 7 foot tall bf

>>37327430
You will be taken for granted though.

Shit always happens with me. Well at least everytime I did experience something like love/relationship. At first i'm totally cool and then i'm afraid that i'll lose it and I turn into a fucking retard and fuck everything up and scare them away.

>>37327417
It got easier for me as I got older. I'm 24 now, and while I still idealise those moments I more or less accept they're just a fantasy. I hold out hope that perhaps later down the line I'll find a below-average looking girl who'll have shit enough self-esteem to overlook my mess of a life/personality. Not exactly holding out for it though.

Knowing that you're not alone in your loneliness/personality/etc does help a lot though, and I've found that more and more as I get older.

>>37327483
I'm 26 and I only think more and more about how it wont happen now if it hasn't already

>>37327454
tfw never even held a hand, girls dont talk to me in general, its like they can feel I am not interesting
>>37327465
i think i'd be a little paranoid but i'd try my absolute best, having had nothing makes you care for the things you do have

>>37327349
Not much to say, it's not an interesting story but I'll share a bit if you want
>Be depressed 15 year old
>Suicidal, no friends, father treats me like shit at home
>Decide "fuck it" and drink a whole lot of bleach
>Wake up an emergency room getting stomach pumped
>Fuck
>They tell me they'll be sending me to a psych ward because of my failed suicide attempt
>Go there and feel incredibly embarrassed and depressed I couldn't even kill myself
>Have to sit in this large room with all other edgelords
>Some girl in the corner of the room is reading a book so I figure if I sit next to her I won't be bothered as I have social anxiety
>Wrong
>She stops reading and starts trying to chat with me
>She looks a little different, some may call her unattractive but I find her features cute
>Anyway we keep talking and become friends and she's the only person I talk to during my stay here
>Bond over mutual depression and sadness
>Have a crush on her but don't mention it
>Weeks pass, kids leave
>Somehow we're still stuck here
>Been here for months now
>One of the staff members notes how we're always together, asks if we're dating
>She says "eww no, not with anon"
>Feel crushed but don't show it
>Later sperg out and mention how that hurt
>She confesses that she actually likes me and I admit I feel the same
>Holy shit I actually have a gf now
>Get released after another month or so and stay in contact
>In relationship with her for a few years, lived with her for a bit
>Things getting better for both of us, I think her depression is leaving
>Killed herself about a year ago out of nowhere
I cut a lot of details because I wanted to keep it short but there you go

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>>37327579
that's just harsh

>>37327097
if it didn't last then how good could it have been?

>>37327510
I suppose we're all on our own individual trajectories, with our own dispositions and coping mechanisms. It's not an easy thing to come to terms with, but I suppose I have enough to distract myself with that it doesn't really matter anymore.

Just remember that these idealised moments come in the context of something that is, at least to me, unfathomably complex and borderline unmanageable. It's like having a wonderful cup of coffee, but having to pay $10k for it when everyone else just pays the normal price. I'm happy to just drink the "tap water" of like-minded friendship - it quenches my thirst and doesn't cost me a whole ton for something I only want for 20 minutes of the day.

>>37327579
Damn dude

thats really really sad :((

>>37327631
all the good things in life end, anon

>>37327631
good enough

better than nothing

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>>37327609
>>37327643
It sucks to say the very least. Thanks for caring robros.

>>37327664
>I love you anon
>lol jk, I love chad now

yeah how wonderful

>>37327753
we're talking about love
if she did that, there was no love

>>37327779
I dated a girl for 5 years. We even lived together for a time. Out of nothing she dumped me for her ex-boyfriend. I think she loved me, but it was kinda like that other anon said

>jk, I love Chad now

She completely broken me and no girl ever wanted something with me anymore. I think I was better when I was KHV.

>>37327888
Maybe she did love you, just not as much as her ex
Or perhaps you're lying to yourself and it wasn't out of nothing


I'd take 5 years of love and a broken heart instead of whatever pit im sitting in now

both suck ass, what use is choosing between pain or pain?

>>37327923
I was KHV until late age, I started dating her when I was 22. Idk, man, I was way much better before her. I was in peace with what I was.

Maybe you're right and I'm lying to myself, but she literally told me that she loved me one week before leaving me. And she seemed happy.

I just remembered now that Kierkegaard quote:

>do it or do not do it: you will regret both.

>>37327959
Maybe some pain can give you something

>>37327959
One pain doesn't end

Other pain has a little good in the beggining

>>37327986
Yeah but remember those 5 years of happiness.
Most of us here have had none

im sad

originsidijsdsjkhd

>>37327986
>I was KHV until late age, I started dating her when I was 22. Idk, man, I was way much better before her. I was in peace with what I was.
yeah, you cared so little about relationships that you got into one