ITT: autistic stories

>be me
>grade 5 or 6 maybe
>everybody in class has to do a personal project
>just a 5 minute presentation about an interst they have
>everyone chooses things like normie celebs, or television shows
>decide to do naruto because extreme autism
>everybody sits through most of the presentations
>my turn maybe 2nd or 3rd last
>talk about naruto for 2 minutes
>people start snickering
>have a clip of the opening thats maybe 45 seconds long
>dont get 15 seconds in before the teacher asks me to switch it off
>nobody talks to me afterwards

>>37325610
>be me
>have a highschool crush
>we spend some time together
>she seems somewhat interested, shy and quiet girl
>feel like I have a chance
>tell a common friend I am thinking of asking her out
>hear them talking during breaktime about how they wonder what kind of girl would ever go out with a guy like me
>never ask her out and slowly and silently break all contacts with her
>a decade later I hear these words every time I am interested in asking a girl out ring in my head and I am a lonely virgin to date

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>>37325610
You should be in kindergarten.

>>37325610
lol anon that's hilarious :3
i feel like if you really opened up you'd find that there's a great personality in there <3

>be me
>come out of mothers womb
>have autism

fuck

>>37326085
How does one get diagnosed with autism?
Also - is there a way to get checked for any mental issues without any of them being added to a profile of yours or something? I don't want to lower my chances on the job market if they pull some disease out of their ass.

>>37326150
i was diagnosed by a pediatrician at 3 or 4 when my mum was worried about me not being very talkative. Aside from eairly age diagnosis i image you ask your GP to reffer you to someone whos job it is to deal with bergers. As for being profiled all medical infromation is classified and can only be released with your consent or in very limited situations like you explicitly telling your doctor you are going to go out and murder someone. so no need to worry about potential employers finding out + employment discrimination based on illness is illegal most places

>>37326797
Cheers, anon. I suppose I will go and get myself checked. I have been having serious anxiety attacks recently. Remembering things that have happened in my past out of nowhere and shouting something out to make them stop involuntarily. Thankfully never in public.

Better go get that shit sorted out before it got worse.

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>taking geology class at local community college
>just broke up with gf of 6 years
>really depressed mentally unstable
>remember in high school how the cool kids would joke with teachers all the time
>first day of class
>teacher says something
>tell stupid joke in response
>people and hot girl next to me laugh
>this gives me such a boost of confidence I've never felt before
>continue making jokes after almost everything he says
>realize no one's laughing anymore
>look like an autistic retard
>rest of semester people avoid being next to me
>sat in front row, a girl even went out of her way to move away from me and make a scene
>realize I'm not in high school anymore, this is a class room of adults that are paying to be here
>cry myself to sleep every night from embarrassment
>contemplate suicide

>>37325610
>be me
>be 20
>be in university
>cute girl comes to sit next to me
>we talk about some random stuff, she seems nice and talkative
>we sit together every lecture and she keeps paying attention to me, I am fucking blind to her being interested in me
>one day she literally draws a heart on my arm in the middle of the lecture and smiles at me
>I try to smile back but inside i am sperging out, heart pounding
>literally feel like my life is threatened and I need to get out and run to safety immediately
>dart out of room after lecture is over
>go home, wash myself
>next time go ahead and sit on a single-char desk to make sure this incident never repeats
>girl was nice enough to remain my friend throughout my entire time at uni despite me being such an awkward sperglord

Why am I such an autistic fuckup?

>>37327061
lol this happened to me too

>some guy tells me a girl is interested in me
>think they are joking with me and fuckign with my feelings
>nah man she really likes you you should go talk to her
>asume they are fucking with me
>find out she does indeed like me
>spergs out and walk away
>never see her again
>the guy asks me what the fuck is wrong with me and if i'm gay or something later on

>yesterday
>be neet
>living in poorfag country
>living at ground floor apartment have to keep all windows completely shut because of people walking by
>they're cheap poor quality and i fuck up on shutting them the last time i closed them
>wake up at 10pm like usual and put porn on computer who's tv monitor is in parallel with the window
>because it's late at night i don't realize that my window is opened so i get on with my morning schedule and i put on my open headphones and remove boxers to start getting erection for "morning fap"
>Start fapping to my usual wierd jav porn
>I can hear laughing over the sound of my open headphones
>think it might be from the video at first and feel impressed by sennheiser's audio quality
>i hear it again louder this time
>turn to the other side while lying in bed naked and see a group of teens literally pointing at me throu the window and laughing
>freeze while heart is racing and having strong ptsd of years of middle school and high school bullying all coming back
>run outside the room in horror
>get clothed and then peak throu the room's door to see if they left
>they can see me peaking and start making more fun of me
>i run off to the bathroom while shaking and crying
>i start hearing them banging on my door
>they start calling me by name after reading it in my doorbell
>i contemplate suicide for what feels like an eternity of waiting for them to leave while sitting on the bathroom floor
>there is finally silence
>slowly and quietly walk while having my ears on the walls to pick up any voices
>go to my room and swiftly close the window while super anxious and i can feel my heartbeat rising
>can't calm down, start stressfully analyzing what just happened
>realise these kids probably live in my area from the fact that there are no places near my area where teens hang out and they were probably just going to their homes near mine
>sudden terrifying realisation
cont?(postlimit)

>>37327667
go ahead, anon. Continue the shitfest.

>>37326993
What you did wrong here is making jokes every time she spoke so it made you look like an obnoxious asshole
You should've waited for the right timings and let your best jokes make people laugh

>>37327667
>while i was proccessing what just happened and looked back at the point when i first realised they were looking at me throu the window i suddenly realised they had their fucking phone cameras on me, in my state of shock at the time i didn't even notice them but once i had calmed down and looked back at what just happened i felt that my life is over

Since then i've been constantly searching everywhere to see if they uploaded videos of me online and i'm terrified at the thought
of how long have they been recording me fapping naked on wierd jav porn.

Well at least this makes killing myself easier now that my life is probably going to be some new meme for retards to point and
laugh at so at least whatever hopes i had for turning my life over and doing something with it are shattered.

I'll probably even stream my suicide just to create the biggest shitstorm out of this, stay tuned i guess.

P.S. don't waste your time telling me to not kill myself, i'm happy i actually get to do it with 0 regrets now that i have convinced
myself that my life has 0% chance at ever changing to the better.

>>37328095
dont kill yourself

oregano

>>37328095
should have just continued fapping as if it didn't phase you

>>37328095
What a retard, i do this on purpose and you're here whining like a little bitch because my privacy:((

>>37328079
This.
Been doing that throughout school and what you did there would only have worked at middle school,
highschool tops. Personally i already started being more moderate with my jokes when i got into
highschool considering how much more critical of your behavior kids become at that age and just made
sure if i was going to make a joke it would be gold.
Making jokes in uni while also lacking confidence is literally recipe for destruction, at uni in order to pull off
jokes like these you need to be very confident have good delivery and obviously know when to make them,
you actually remind me of a socially retarded friend of mine who fucked up similarly to you, if this gives you
any hopes he got ripped and restored his social status and now is having a pretty good college life.
Best strategy now would be to just minimize your presence in school and just be patient until it is forgotten.
Good thing with universities is that people there usually have better things to do than give too much attention
to someones autistic behavior and will probably forget by next year anyway.
Just focus on dealing with your emotional struggle while being quiet and distant in uni so you avoid more
emotionally damaging situations and move on.

My life is full of small autistic stories, I don't think I have any worth telling

This one's not really autism but just unawareness

>arrive in high school
>was a social outcast in middle school
>I acquire a few friends by luck and my autism severely calms down
>have this literature class
>across the room diagonally, this cute redheaded girl sits
>she keeps looking at me
>even smiling
>start "flirting" back with her
>hoping this is going somewhere, I later see her in the halls and prepare to strike up conversation
>it turns out she just has a lazy eye and wasn't actually looking at me
>lose all confidence
>she begins avoiding me after catching my autistic flirting

I'm just happy no one else saw it

>>37328285
continueing on fapping while staring intensly at them would probably have been
the best course of action...
I wish i had the emotional strength to pull that off but my years of getting bullied
in school came in ptsd-like and fucked my shit up.

>>37328290
Sorry anon but i can't handle people judging me, thats how depression works on me i guess.

>>37328319
I cant either, thats why i try and get sexual enjoyment out of it

Who gives a fuck about a fapping dude. on which garbage site could they post this vid anyways?
But if you kill yourself, and I read about this story somewhere, I will get that video and I will post it everywhere. I bet noone will care about your death after that.

>>37327667
>>37328095
dude a similar thing happened to me but in high school
>be me a couple years ago
>end of school year, classes are done but were required to be in school so the place gets tax dollars
>in pe class
>teacher just has us walk around the track
>sneak off to the restroom before we go outside
>get on my phone and start looking at some anime girls in a stall
>door wont close so I just let it hang kinda open but its mostly closed
>jerking off when someone comes in
>just ignore it and keep fapping
>more people come in
>still stroking when I hear laughter
>turn around
>the door was open and there were like 5 chads and a stacy watching me stroke my erect penis to Chinese cartoons
>one of them was filming me
>I was 17 at the time (inb4 underage I'm 19 now)
>sue his family for child pornography
kek at least I fucked chads life up

>>37328379
Well my reaction to the whole thing and the fact that i didn't turn around the first time
i heard something and i was lying naked while being fat and stroking my tiny fat guy
dick and watching very fat asians getting fucked in their bellybuttons all oiled up could
make for a pretty viral vid.
I also didn't mention that i made autistic noises while running outside the room.

>>37328461
You havent got out in a while havent you? This kind of shit isnt interesting for anybody, if you wanna kill yourself please. Dont do it for this stupid reason, at least find some meaning in your death, kill a politician, what the fuck i dont know, no one cares about fat people being disgusting, theyre disgusting enough as they are.

>>37327667
Fucking sue them if they spread it you dumb fuck, its literally free additional neetbucks for them filming you within the privacy of your own home and then distributing pornographic imagery of you without your consent.

>>37328927
But i barely have enough money to support myself, there's no way i can pay a
lawyer and it's even harder to try and do it myself because of social anxiety
which is at its worst at the moment making me have panic attacks whenever in
a room with people.

>>37329027
I get you, anon. I have issues similar to yours but yours seem even more severe.

Reason why I still stay alive is because I will eventually die anyway. There is no need to rush it, it will come. Might as well live for whatever little snippets of joy exist in my life rather than forgo them out of fear that something bad will happen.

Just remember that whatever happens to you, and whatever embarassing shit you do, in the grand scale of things it doesnt matter. Looking at things from this perspective helped me out a lot with my anxiety attacks.

>go to class
>someone is sitting on my seat
>decide to man the fuck up
>tell him to go away
>"uhm.... this is my seat"
>we changed seats last time
>stutter and ask where's my new seat

>>37329088
Well my greatest despair is the return of bullying
The only thing that kept me going so far was that even tho i wouldn't interact with any human being i would at
least live within my own solitude having my life at least no more ruined from other people making me suffer
like they have for the better part of my life.
And as i had tiny rays of hope for the future and felt like i could live like this, then this fucking happens...
I am certain they'll come back banging on my door and windows, they can probably even break in
considering the shit quality of my windows.
I just can't handle this situation, yeah even if a few months later if i ignore all this maybe it will be forgotten,
a video of me in this situations will forever be online and that thought alone just kills me, i feel like the whole
world is staring at me at my most exposed and depraved situation.

>>37326085
5pbp

Mods can smoke a chode. Muting on /r9k/ is stupid

>be me
>ex--yu teen
>16 years old
>goes to store
>forgot wallet, the woman is done checking through half of my stuff
>panic.bat
>start pretending to have a heart attack
>everybody saw i was pretending
>ohfuck.cmd
>plan b
>start acting like you're a special needs person
>slam the counter
>people get scared
>"sir I'm calling the police"
>OHFUCKNO.exe
>ERROR 404: COMMON SENSE NOT FOUND
>start saying "it's just a prank, don't be mad"
>two guys behind me get pissed and try to manhandle me
>start running screaming "IT'S WAS A PRANK"
>security starts chasing me as well with the 2 guys
>hit an old lady
>old lady falls down and breaks her nose
>say "THIS IS A PART OF THE PRANK, IT'S FAKE BLOOD"
>run outside the store
>trip and reach a state of unconciousness
>wake up in a hospital
>police officers and a nurse next to me
>no serious injuries
>get dragged to the police station
>they have security camera footage
>they watch it
>they start bursting out laughing at how autistic i am
>they don't arrest me because they feel pity on me

Why am I so retarded?

>>37325848
Fucking kek. Why did the teacher take issue with it?

>>37328095
For what it's worth your story made me laugh my ass off anon and i really needed that so thank you.

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>>37329628
>Stolen story

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>be me
>grade 7 just finished watching YouTube video of someone grabbing girls butts and calling it a "goose"
>holy shit my gr 7 sides
>decide everyone should know how funny this is
>during recess I find a stick
>start running around the playground shoving the stick up girls asses
>"There's a goose on the loose"
>no one laughs and everyone seems genuinely horrified
>sitting in class hearing some chick talk to the teacher about me shoving sticks up girls butts
>don't get in trouble because she probably realizes I have complete social awareness
>get the most concerned, scared and disgusted look in the world

Wtf was my problem

>>37328419
So you were facing towards the toilet while fapping? Thats even more unrealistic than taking chad to court for cp

>>37325610
>be 14
>at my friend, playing vidya
>get gaseous, stomach hurts, really need to fart
>figure out gasses rise upwards
>"wait a minute pal, I have an urgent need"
>crouch on the sofa, butt upward, wiggle ass around to get those gasses moving
>after a minute or so, rewarding farts start to emerge from inside my bowels
>BRAP BRAP BRRRAAPPITY BRRRRAAAPP
>her little sister of my age comes to the room
>they both are like srsly wtf anon
>I keep farting for a while, then we continue with vidya

To my defence, the mentioned friend once wanted to have a fap competition outside, so I guess we came out even.

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>>37325610
>>37327061
I actually keked out loud, thanks anons
>>37326993
Maybe you'll learn your lesson next time and not try to force humor opinion dumb fuck
>>37325610
>5th grade
>get an erection in mathematics
>teacher calls me to the board to write the answer
>fuck.png
>walk up pinning my boner with one hand
>turn around, classmates looking at me weird
>"take your hands out of your pocket anon"
>I hit the fucking jets out of the room
>change schools after

>>37329867
And another one
>be me
>balls dropped, start to become a horny boi
>go on computer and discover the wonders of porn
>fap to jpg's.jpg
>one day get home from paper route
>mother absolutely furious asking if I want to explain why there's pornography in the history
>why tf do you think?
>get really scared and blame it on older brother
>Mom knows I'm full of shit because I spelled "lesbian" wrong
>get grounded for a month straight and am not allowed to use the computer for 2 months
>fast forward a year in class
>have become foot fag from sexual neglect and desperately trying to fap to anything
>girls taking shoes off under desk making me horny
>put hand in pocket and start jerkin my gerkin and jizz in my underwear
>one day get caught by chad
>anon what the hell?
>from that point onwards no one will even make eye contact with me

Should I go an hero?

>>37328095
Remember to drop a link for us to enjoy
Also do it in some fun way, maybe shoot up a school first or something

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>get horny in middle school
>start jerking off under jeans under the impression that no one would notice
>finish
>two girls in front of me turn around and giggle
>don't even understand why until years later

>need to take a shit
>go to the bathroom
>spend 45 minutes shitting out the worst one of my life
>"anon are you okay? the teacher wants to make sure you're alright"
>"yeah i'm good"

>walk into class
>"haha look, anon washed his hair!"

>get called "Bucky Larson" after I get my hair cut

fucking end my life lads

>>37330319
Guns are illegal where i live, i'll probably do it in some creative way just because i'd rather have
that story get exposure and possibly ruin those cunts lives because hey it's everyones free chance
at getting ethical points by blasting those mean kids that made this retard suicide.
Probably making it look like i have even more severe autism than i have will make this even better for
victimhood points.
Will probably make a dedicated thread later once i am fully determined and ready to start setting it
all up.

>>37329736
Because he was showing a cartoon for 1/5 of his presentation. Boundaries need to be set.

>>37325899
>they wonder what kind of girl would ever go out with a guy like me

Set your sights lower anon and take a chance. You wanted a shy average girl. Go for a 1/10 or 2/10.

>>37327061
>literally feel like my life is threatened and I need to get out and run to safety immediately

This is part of my fetish. Some people are glad you exist, anon

>>37325848

I may just be a gr/a/npa fallen out of the loop, but isn't Nurutu supposed to be like the normiest normiecore shit in elementary school? Where do you even live?

>>37329736
Because it wasn't Haruka Kanata

This thread is too good to die, come on anons

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>>37327667
kek'd
include me in the screenshot

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>>37325610
>be me
>be in year 8 (around 12 years old for those non-brits)
>have a bit of a class clown reputation (or autistic)
>get sent out of Spanish class for being a bit of an annoyance
>head of Spanish Department walks down corridor
>oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck
>need to find a good reason for being sent out of class or I will be in big shit
>grandad died during summer, I realize
>"why have you been sent out"
>b-because I was upset that my grandad died
>"are you sure, let me talk to your teacher about that"
>OH SHIT.webm
>spanish teacher tells the truth about why I am outside
>now crying because I know that this is the worst thing I had done
>head of department drags me to her office, calls my mum
>now crying even more, begging her to stop
>"anon has used the death of your father in an attempt to justify his actions"
>call lasts an hour, crying throughout
>lunch bell rings, head of department smiles and lets me outside
>nobody remembers the situation, my mum, nor teachers, nor friends
>mfw I made the situation worse for no reason