Oneitis

A oneitis is usually a female friend, one you known well, one you know is different and isn't replaceable but she doesn't share the same feelings

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>>37248437
>implying I haven't already tried talking to her

>>37248491
From what I've seen on this board, oneitis is quite often some girl that robot likes, likes a lot, but can't muster up the courage to talk to her and is obsessed with her.

>>37248494
and? How did it go?

>>37248553
I eventually asked her out and she asked if I meant it like a real date, and I said yes. Then she went off about how she couldn't date right now and how she'd just drag me down. I took it as she just plain didn't like me and tried to move on. Then four months later she ran into me at college and started texting me again and asked me out to lunch. We had lunch but didn't contact eachother afterwards. And now I ran into her at the local mall last week, after not seeing her since october. I had really thought I had gotten over her but I hadn't, I still love her voice and her smile. She seemed so happy to see me, but I have to remind myself that for whatever reason she truly does not want to see me. She's also never had a boyfriend in all the time that I've known her (since we were 14), so I know that she would rather be alone than be around me.

>>37248683
> We had lunch but didn't contact eachother afterwards.

Girls will not contact you by themselves if you aren't a 10/10 Chad. They are usually a lot more insecure than guys, and if you don't contact them they assume you are not interested in her at all, not even as friends


> I have to remind myself that for whatever reason she truly does not want to see me

What makes you say this? If she "seemed happy to see you", and asked you to lunch before, she at least wants to talk with you.
Text her, invite her out for a coffee or something and don't tell her it's a date straight away. She already knows you like her, so just try to become friends, get to know her better, get her to know you better and then you'll know for sure.
Worst case scenario, you'll ignore her again, nothing changes. Based on what you write, I'd say this won't happen though, if you won't sperg out, you could at least be friends.

>>37248842
>Girls will not contact you by themselves
I know... I was scared desu. She had her phone out while we were at lunch and it pissed me off and it made me feel like she met me for lunch only because she felt bad about turning me down previously.

Overall I think she's just being friendly to me. If she was being more than friendly she would've gone out with me a year ago. I don't even have her number anymore anyway, I deleted it after October because I wanted to forget about her. I might be able to find it on my old phone with a little digging, or I suppose I could go back to the mall, since she worked at a store, but it seems creepy to go somewhere that she has to be.

>>37249032
Yeah some girls do that, but you can't always assume the worst. How did she talk to you - did she ask you anything? Was she smiling? Or did she only respond to your questions with short sentences?

That's definitely possible, but from what I've seen girls often want to be friends first before getting on next level so that they can get to know you better. There's a thin line between this and friendzone though.
It shouldn't be creepy if you don't act creepy, if you just go in there, and tell her the truth - that you lost her number and you remembered she worked there - and tell her you'd like to go out for a coffee sometime, it's your best chance.

It's your call though, if you want to forget about her, ignore my advice.

>>37248553
Oh I must be in the minority then, there is a girl I met in school when I was younger, somehow fell hard for her. She was weird browsed r9k too and I talked to her all through high school.

I recently made the decision I need to ask her out or stop talking to her because every time we talked I had a lot of feelings towards her. I've known she wasn't into me multiple times and I've tried deleting her in the past but always came back.

I'm done with her for good now though

>>37248437
But she thinks I'm weird and awkward, OP.

And I can't stand being around her because she is always with her Chad bf who impales her...

>If you like a girl, why don't you just start talking to her and become friends with her?
>its inappropriate to start talking with strangers in my culture
your advice is shit

Oneitis is literally just when someone pts a girl on a pedastal and considers her to be "the one", nothing more, nothing less.

I dated my oneitis for half a year and fucked her and she's still my oneitis after she dumped me

>>37249422
>>37249395
>>37249392
>>37249032
Become sexually aggressive, Anon!!!! Get super duper de la pooper high as balls on... Weed!!!! Attack the object of your desires!

>>37249392
We talked a lot at lunch, went to coffee after, whole thing mustve lasted over three hours.

I was scared of going really slow, didn't want to get trapped in the friend zone. I could try to ask her out now and slowly), but I just feel like with our history it's really best for me that I move on.

If I talked to her now it'd be obvious that I still had feelings for her. I don't think it'd be creepy, but I feel like she'd be too kind to say no but she wouldn't actually want to go out with me.

>>37249525
If you talked a lot, she's at least interested in being friends with you. Have you maybe noticed any "hints"? Did she sit opposite of you or next to you? Did she touch you during the lunch/coffee at all? Did she hug you at the end or simply said goodbye?

From what you say it sounds like she doesn't know what she wants, which could be good but it's risky. If you don't want to be "just" friends with her and you don't want to gamble, move on, but otherwise give it a shot, you have nothing to lose.