/britfeel/

>>37013299
How's Tesco and National lottery doing?

who originlly /wantstofuckingdie/ here?

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I've got an idea for a great new meme lads

When you try to make a post, but get blocked by the robot, you have to put this image in your post and say "bloxo cubes" at the bottom of your post

who spends most of day in bed on laptop here? To the point of back ache and crippling pain?

hahahahahah

When I was picking up a fork today I received an instantaneous urge to stab it in my neck.

I managed to fight the urge but I felt my arm moving to do it.

I'm a bit worried to be honest, I might not be able to fight the urge next time.

Need to think of an excuse of why I'm not going to the pub with my mates that isn't 'I'm poor'

why is there no male sex talk for women.

theres females pov for men, but no male pov for women... just saying.

now im sure its cos women are actually having sex. but still.... just odd this doesn't exist.

>>37013422
tell them you have incomprehensibly bad diarrhoea

>>37013372
>who spends most of day in bed on laptop here?
Me. Have my pillows and duvet arranged in a way that minimises discomfort though

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Post you're waifu ITT if you like

>>37013427
good shout lad.

have not really thought of this myself. i know there is female targeted porn on porn hub, and it concentrates more on the man than the women.

women dont really watch much porn compared to men. quite a lot of women have a sex partner or will find someone online to role play with, will watch the same porn movie over and over again, or just use their imagination.

>>37013372
>>37013466
I've spent all weekend in bed.

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>>37013299
is frogposting allowed here ?

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afternoon lads, another long night ahead of us

cheeky pre-shift chill with top-tier funk, how are the lads doing this sunny afternoon

>>37013559
>sunny afternoon
i wish anon, been pissing it down for about 20 hours straight around here

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>>37013468
There were some very nice doggos at the shelter, but we probably won't get one. One could fit two whole tennis balls in its mouth.

>>37013559
love a bit of George Clinton lad

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>>37013468
I would never do such a thing.

>>37013468
I'm waifu. There, did it.

>>37013583
sounds comfy tbqh

>>37013613
as is right and proper lad

>>37013664
not comfy when i don't have anywhere to have a smoke without getting drenched

why do characters in medieval movies/tv shows always have english accents

totally ruins it for me i saw a thing about dracula and he had an english accent in what world does this make any sense

>>37013559
cut your nails since last time you posted i see

nice to see

>>37013692
are those medieval shows perhaps set in England?

Dracula is also a bat, he can travel wherever the fuck he wants. maybe he enjoys spending time in England.

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>>37013468
My mum's borrowing my laptop, think I might have a panic attack

>>37013752
set up a guest account

>>37013721
nah I just thumbsed up with my left hand this time

my strumming nails aren't going anywhere

>>37013752
cant you just set up a guest account or something?

>>37013752
Make sure you zip up the lewd so it doesn't appear in search boxes mid type

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>>37013468
Just eaten a roast beef sandwich tbqh

it was a good one

>>37013684
why not smoke inside lad

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eating a lemon ice lolly

>last night had the first real suicidal thoughts since last year

>>37013361
Underrated post.

Chicken bloxo cubes

>>37013870
whats bothering you lad?

>>37013847
still living with mum and dad lad, can't be helped

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>>37013546
It's actively encouraged lad.

>>37013782
wish i could play an instrument tbqhwyl

don't think i'm normie enough though

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>>37013299
once white women go black edition

Oh, it's great being black in a white neighbourhood

>White boys wont DARE start a fight with you

*intimidates white boy*

>You get to fuck EVERY white girl within a one mile radius with your big beautiful black...

*cuts to interracial sex scene*

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tyhmlS-CMsQ

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>>37013934
onli tod post her pls

>>37013937
don't have to be a normie to play an instrument lad, just look at buckethead

he might be a literal robot

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>>37013934
Hope one day i will be chad

Get on with it faggots

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BBR5v89L6gk

>>37013733
he did in the book ffs

weird lads. think i have just been trolled by some kid from omegle. i spoke to someone on the chat option on omegle. they claimed to be girl and they wanted to talk to me on kik. i added them and spoke to them normally for a bit, and then they suddenly said "i am a smaller youtuber and you have been trolled". i just said "alright" and blocked them.

guessing they are about 10 because it was literally the worst troll. hope no one sees it though.

>>37013937
>don't think i'm normie enough though
Look into post rock. The genre is populated with autistic musicians.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hgjba4D9uKg

>>37013997
how can you tell an accent from a book

>>37013919
shame lad, you'll get to leave the birdcage one day

hope the rain clears soon so you can have a comfy smoke

>>37013870
we love you lad, tell us what's got you down

>>37014023

Dracula chilled out in London in the book

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>>37013959
reminds me of this

bloxo cubes

Just gobbled up a kfc mighty bucket for one, large of course. Start work at spoons at six. Will probably have a chicken burger halfway through the shift.

Who else knows them fatty feels?

>>37014023
"oi Van 'Elsing u better watch it m8 or I'll get ya with my chompers"

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>>37013885
>>37014024
well I just delude myself to keep going really, sometimes the realizations all hit at once. It gets to the point where my head is so full and pressured it hurts a lot, like its going to explode or something. Keeps frequently happening and its very distressing.

I realized that despite me actually trying to break out of being a complete shut in its just backfiring.

>start going to foundation maths/english (GCSE C) level but its going slow as fuck and I'm treated like an idiot 2hours every week - Will lead to nothing
>try reaching out more to get friends - IRL friends still non-existant, haven't even talked to anyone outside my parents in all this time despite going outside now, online friends I "made" I get the impression they don't care and are working on self-interest or something
>buy a car, too scared to drive and don't go anywhere because I have no where to go - Risk and reward isn't worth it.

in trying all this i've lost the little bit of escapism I had before in video games - I detest playing them now almost so I'm probably even worse off than before. I see no way out tbqh. Everything I could do now just seems unappealing, majority of people my age have done more in 2017 than i've done in 8 years

well, theres a shitty blog. I didn't explain it too well and just came off as whiny again.

>>37013934
good

>>37014063
You sound very very fat lad. How much you weigh?

>>37014024
it has cleared up for a brief moment so i just nipped out for one, cheers lad

>>37014063
I just ate a pack of forty chicken dippers with potato waffles. My tummy hurts.

Just had a lovely roast dinner lads. Only 2nd thing I've eaten today because I dont want to turn into a fat fuck like some of you apparently are.

>>37014076
>start going to foundation maths/english
Stick with it, whole process will be painful but worth it in the end

> try reaching out more to get friends
Not sure how this is even possible as an adult without the framework of a workplace or an activity you go and do (normshit)

> video games - I detest playing them
Invest your time in something more rewarding, take up a creative pursuit. Feels so much better to have spent the day making something and then at the end of it the games will feel better to play as a reward

>>37013947
>Muh Dick: The TV Series
Why do niggers and their worshippers behave in such a crass, vile manner?

last few times i have asked you guys for help i have received not a single reply.

>>37014120
Forty chicken dippers sounds good. Hope they were crispy.
>>37014086
15 stone. 6ft1. Could be fatter.

Gonna get a bag of sweets for dessert. A sharing bag obviously.

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>>37014197
Here is a (you).

May based Corbyn solve your problems.

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>>37014181
insecure white dicklet spotted

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>>37014076
>majority of people my age have done more in 2017 than i've done in 8 years

This hits home so bad.

Many things that sound normal for others aren't for me. For example, I have never gone to the cinema, mall ... with friends.

It's not the lack of trying, i have asked people before but they always refuse or desist at the last time.

Such the life of an undesirable.

>>37014063
I always start my shift with two hot peperamis, two picnic bars, a big bag of crisps, a pack of brownies and a box of tunnocks teacakes, I can't imagine living any other way

don't know why I'm not actually fat, maybe because I literally don't eat on my days off

>>37014096
good lad, settle in and live the good life

>>37014076
I know that feel lad, but you should be proud of the fact you're trying to get your life in order instead of sitting around doing nothing but feeling sorry for yourself, it's a great deal more than some people muster

if you're struggling with a sense of purpose, try looking into creative pursuits like writing, art or even just thinking critically about media like films or music, I used to feel exactly like you before I hunkered down and started writing

you don't sound whiny at all lad, your problems are very real to you and that's all the validation you need, but good on you for having the motivation to try and better yourself

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>>37013468
>do the no sleep reset yesterday
>wake up at 4pm after going to bed at midnight
Fuck

>>37014247
this year I have:
>stopped biting my nails
>all but fixed my psoriasis
>done my motorcycle theory test (mod1 next)
>lost 4 stone (9.5 in total from last year)
none of these are exceptional goals, but I'm better for them
still need to find a job and move out of my mums house

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>>37014172
thanks for a constructive response.

I mean I tried reaching out for more diverse online friends but I don't think its going that well.

I bought a load of books but half the time its too loud in my house to focus on reading them, also tried getting into movies but I just can't find myself to do it. I go to bed telling myself i'll do it everyday but by the time i've been awake for a few hours I'm already on the ropes and telling myself "tommorow" till I do nothing. Thats part of the problem and why i'm getting so angry, I spend 16hours a day doing nothing and I can't find a healthy way out. I always feel I could be doing something more constructive with my time to the point where I start reading a book and think "this other book will be a better usage of my time" or watching a movie and thinking "I should be reading that other book or watching a documentary"

>>37014247
I haven't travelled further than the nearest town which is 15mins away in years, I can't even begin imaging travelling any further by myself. It takes all my mental energy just to leave the house and people just travel across the country/world like its nothing

>>37014258
>tfw used to eat a pepperami every breaktime at school and then a pizza for lunch
No wonder I ended up at 16stone at 15

>>37014295
How'd you stop biting your nails? Any particular thing? Or just stopped?

I just seem to do it subconsciously :(

>>37014370
the elastic band technique

couple of months and now I don't need it any more

>>37014307
sounds like you're really badly depressed, you should see a doctor and try anti depressants or therapy or something
you should keep with the things you're doing and just focus on what comes next

>>37014370
not that anon, but have you tried using that nail varnish stuff? it tastes disgusting and at least you realise you're biting them then

Just had a spliff lads. Who else /ondrugs/?

>>37014239
>Ooga booga muh dick white boi
Rarely will the nigger, in his eternal, animalistic primitiveness, ever retort with anything else.

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>>37013468
you're waifu ITT if you like

lads, should i quit my jobberino?

>current year
>people still falling for the bait

>shops close at 5 on sundays
I need my fucking alcohol lads

Mum is watching her paki dramas on free view channel 77 again

I told her it was astonishing that people still lived like this
And she got angry, tried to claim the show was fictional and that India/Pakistan are highly modern and civilized

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>>37014384
I went last month, got sent to some useless place, new big building that was practically empty, went through 3 keycarded doors before being questioned by a fat women before she said "theres nothing we can do for you". no wonder the NHS doesn't work.


who /nationalizetherailways/ here?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-vY7U9rQI70

hello /britfeel/ i am black

>>37014227
thanks lad.

you guys are cool but i guess some of my issues are not relatable

>>37014484
Then why doesn't she fuck off back then?

>>37014506
hello black, how are you doing today?

Bloody hell, lots of shit got stuck in my arse hair. No matter how much I epilate I'm always so hairy, it's bringing me down...

>>37014530
im doing good friend, how are you?

>>37014529
That's what I keep telling her but she gets so mad

>>37014506
wha gwan cuz. come we go fuck every whyte girl with a one mile radius ya get me then man can intimidate some whyte bois

>>37014506
Saw some girl eating a magnum and couldn't help wanking to the thought of her tongue worshiping some BBC. Also hello there.

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itt: a distinct lack of uncommon amphibians

>>37014540
Fuck sake you vile beast I'm tyring to eat natto here.

>>37014560
i'm not too bad myself thank you
what have you been up to today? anything nice?

Need a reccomendation for something to watch on Netflix while I'm eating my dindin lads

>>37014506
white girl here. i got wet just reading your comment omg

>>37014506
hello I am white

do you like funkadelic

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>>37014638
any of these little retarded frogs they're my fav

>>37014666
>netflix
>666
>thinkingface.jpg

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https://www.wordsthatfollow.com/play/game.php?gid=1142

its that time again lads

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>>37014638
>a distinct lack of uncommon amphibians
Found one

>>37014656
i played some video games and sat around reading stuff on britfeel desu, how about yourself?

>>37014666
Pokemon
bloxo cubes

anyone know where to get blue striped overalls? need em for sunnycon and mcm for my day 2 costume.


i already have the wig, long handcuffs, armbandages and steroids but i cant fucking find the color blue.

such a waste to just buy a black version from amazon or luvyababes after all that work, granted the one from the fancy dress store was super form fitting if a little thin and cheap feeling.

spent like 80quid plus work on my ryu costume so i dont feel like movin backwards.

>>37014666
Luke Cage.

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>>37014701

pic for reference.. rjfbbrj

>>37014678
i have no idea what that is desu mate

>>37014666
iZombie tbqhwy

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>>37014685
Apustaja = GOAT frog.

>>37014692
Well spotted friendo

>>37014720
cant you just google cody costume

>>37014701
>mcm
I'm going to punch you in the fucking dick if I see you

>>37014701
>overalls
I kinda want to buy (girl) dungarees after seeing my a manager at work and the tranny wearing them

>>37014695
sounds comfy what did you play?
went out for a bit and enjoyed the sun now just chilling v comfy
>>37014735
is there one with a doggo

>>37014506
My gf is black.

>>37014479
>drinking on a Sunday.

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>>37013752

>watching someone "just use your computer for a sec" and they start typing in the address bar and suggestions come up

>>37014759

hes not that popular/overused.

which is why a google image search shows no items in the uk, and american cosplayers with 12 inch arms and a belly trying to cosplay a roidmonster with their terribly fitting overalls (think non-slim fiy or athletic clothes for fat people)

>>37014814
>>drinking on a Sunday.
Great day for it tchin-tchin!

>>37014827
You could wear this.
https://www.amazon.co.uk/d/Womens-Nightwear/OCTAVE-Ladies-Striped-Hooded-Loungewear-Nightwear-Stripes/B00GB2SS5U/
:^)

>>37014839
Don't you have work tomorrow? It'd be a bad day to have a hangover.

>>37014812
persona 5 and the rising storm 2: vietnam beta, both pretty funny, its been a good sunday

>>37014867

No, nor any other day.

However judging by the crowds around the beer garden this afternoon there will be a lot of competition for the alka seltzer in the morning. So it should be no big deal.

Always enjoy a few on a Sunday.

>>37014814
Must be nice to be a functioning human lad

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>>37014823
My suggestions bar is filled with so much degenerate shit I can't even leave my pc open for a second with my parents watching.

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>>37014812
>is there one with a doggo
Don't have a froggo/doggo I'm afraid. Got one with a horse if that helps.

>>37015001

Well, you could always clear them lad.

what should i read first lads

the complete works of plato or the history of the english speaking peoples?

>>37015015
No, I need shortcuts for special examples

>>37014295
How'd you fix your psoriasis? Mines getting worse

>>37014701
>>37014720
you could get something blue then spray white stripes, or something white and spray blue stripes.

I think we have a forum for this kind of thing.

>>37014823
That's why I haven't bothered uninstalling IE

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>>37013934
/britfeel/ will like this one

>>37015058

it will not be perfectly symmetrical

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>>37014871
glad to hear anon, hope it stays just as good for you

>>37015052
light therapy and corticosteroids

>>37015112
Can't wait until I get my bf with a double bed.

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>>37014823
>they look up exchange to read their emails
>exhentai comes up

>>37014814
but you smashed and dashed baaare whyte gyal tho init?

>>37015122
can be if youre not a fucking idiot. just mask it correctly.

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>>37014812
Just looking through the old pepe folder

>>37013752
>>37014823
>>37015151
These are some intense feels

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waifuposters in a nutshell

>>37014814
It's the white liberal pretends to be a "based black man" edition

wtf im just going to ignore the disproportionate amount of crime and their toxic violent culture now

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>>37015112
homofrog raps about gay love

>>37015239
that was a pleasant read.

Thanks anon, here is a (you)

>>37015253
Nah, patriotic Brit here, voted UKIP last election. gf votes tory because she hates the welfare culture that labour created.

>decide to play some vidya games
>all the discs are in the wrong boxes and can't find the one i want

i hate myself

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>Eat an ice lolly
>Hours later I find a little chocolate stain on my pyjama top

>>37015319
>patriotic Brit
Wrong. Niggers aren't British.

The freezer at my local coop broke and they selling the milk off at reduced prices. 20p for four pints.

Being a total cunt I bought 24 pints of whole milk and I don't know what to do with it,

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>watching porn and fapping
>hear my brother laughing in his room
>think he's watching me on a hidden camera
>cock goes soft from potential embarrassment
>give up fapping
>put it away
>hear him get up and go down stairs

/what if/?

>>37014307
Books are good but its a passive form of entertainment not something you shape yourself. That's why I said start doing something creative, even if you suck at it at first you'll find yourself getting better at it and it's a good motivation

>>37015431
>6:30pm
>Pyjamas

>>37015527
>Not constantly wearing your PJs

What are you, some kind of normie wageslave who actually leaves the house?

>>37015029

No.
You don't.

You are the cause of your own problems.

>>37013632
>those ghastly tats

She's aging like milk too.

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>>37015541
>mfw imagining government agents skimming through all the gay furry porn and /trash/ I browse

>>37015487

Make cheese lad

>>37015491
>think he's watching me on a hidden camera
so it's not just me that has these thoughts
I've even checked for cameras before
also
>someone laughs in public
>immediately think they must be laughing at me
I don't even look weird, these thoughts are irrational but i can't help it.

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Tea and toast time lads

Pretty comfy

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>>37015729
>No jam on your toast
>Those un-buttered spots
>Mug isn't full to the brim

Please fill in the gap:

It is acceptable for a grown man to eat, at most, __ biscuits per day.

>>37015729

Please improve your buttering technique

>>37015803

>It is acceptable for a grown man to eat, at most, two packets of biscuits per day.

>>37015319
based black man XD

We know you're white and shilling for coons so just stop

>>37015809
Most of it melted in by the time I took a picture. Meh

>>37015803
an entire pack, maybe more depending on the biscuit-to-tea ratio

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>>37015729
Cheers lad! mummy makes the best tasting tea imo.

>>37015487
>24 pints of whole milk
pics

>>37015803
>It is acceptable for a grown man to eat, at most, 5 biscuits per day.
And that's pushing it

>>37015803

It is acceptable for a grown man to eat, at most, 3.5*10^16 biscuits per day.

>>37015487
Put them in the freezer and drink them for massive gainz.

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>>37015729
>Piss weak attempt at buttering the toast
>Boiled milk with a hint of teabag

THROW IT OUT
TRY AGAIN LAD

>>37015803
>>37015821
>>37015841
>>37015871

What biscuits we talking here lads?

>>37015729

Yucky plastic bread though.

>>37015891
I was thinking chocolate digestives

>>37015891
Crunch creams are the patrician's biccy.

>>37015882

I have considered your suggestion, and I am afraid the answer is no.

>>37015909
At school my lunch was 2 packs of these

Reminder that British food is the worst in the world

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A pack of these gingery bad boys tend to only last me 3 sittings.

>>37015962
You must be more biscuit than man by now.

fancy a fried egg, chili, cheese, chutney sandwich

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>>37015803
Either:
>3 (chocolate) digestives
or
>3 Hobnobs
or
>2 Chocolate Hobnobs
or
>7 bourbons

No more, no less.

>>37016013

Pretty decent, but I'll have the egg poached, thanks.

>>37016000
This has had me howling, also nice digits
>>37016013
Calm down Lister

>>37015803

Depends entirely on how much tea you're having. It's 1-2 biccies per cup.

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>see one of my old """friends""" from secondary school
>they have clearly become a normie
>self loathing kicks in
>end up binging and purging twice

Gah I hate myself. I am pretty comfy now though, playing video games and drinking diet 7 up. Quite nice~

What have you got planned for this evening lads?

>>37015803
Per cuppa the acceptable number is:
>2 digestives/rich tea/hob nobs
>3 bourbons/custard creams/nice biscuits, or equivalent
>1 chocolate biscuit

You should limit it to 3 biscuit cuppas per day

>>37016077
Please stop wasting food, it makes me sangry.

>>37016077

my facebook page has recently been invaded by the only girlfriend ive ever had who finished with me 7 years ago and i still cant get over it, for some reason shes become friends with alot of my friends on there but hasnt spoken to me directly, i think tonight calls for a walk around memory lane at 2am or so with a few cans from the shop and a pack of their cheapest cigs

>>37016077

Eating fried chicken and drinking Chianti.

>>37015962
I'll be honest mate doesnt sound like a great upbringing.

>>37016113
it's not wasting it
in fact it's being efficient

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>work tomorrow
>and the day after that
>and the day after that
>and the day after that
>and the day after that
>and the week after that
>and the month after that
>and the year after that
>and the decade after that
>and the decade after that
>and the decade after that
>and the decade after that

>>37016192

7 days a week laddy? your wages must be good though

H-ha tomorrow I'll sort my life out, right?

Where can I cop quality desuan in the uk

>>37016229

yep, always tomorrow, tonight is my last night of drinking too much, chainsmoking and staying up until 6am, again

>>37016218
He said 5 days you fucking IDIOT

>>37016264

no he didnt
>no he didnt

>>37016277

literally did, lad.

>>37016277
Its Sunday
>work tomorrow(monday)
>4 days after that
Then back in after the weekend
IDIOT

>>37016192
You'll be working till the day you die

>>37016327

saying one thing 5 times isnt the same as specifically saying "5 days" Youd make a shit solicitor lad, its no wonder youre wasting your life away in here

I got two choices lads.

>kill myself

>live the hobo homeless life

Long story short, debts money mental health.

What would you do lads?

Anyone watching Bigheads on ITV?

>>37016337

I sometimes wonder what going to work would be like, in much the same way as I wonder what it's like in jail, or which I would prefer if I had to choose. Jail has it's attractions.

>>37016356
No. Manford is a fucking creeper

>>37016192
>Slacked off the last two weeks at work
>one week left to complete the project I haven't started
oops

>>37016350

Hit the road probably, but not in the UK.

>>37016192

>only around 10,500 more work days before retirement

>>37016350
try the hobo life.

If it's shitty, then i would consider kms. Good luck anon.

>>37016350

At least it's summer, good time to be homeless. Might be able to turn it round by winter.

>>37016350

You forgot the option where you can come and live with me and give me handjobs in exchange for a cupboard to sleep in and free tea or coffee

Inspired by the anon from earlier I've downloaded Star Trek TNG.

>>37016077
Trying to calm myself down but failing.

My head hurts so much. Theres so much anger and pressure built up in there it feels like its going to explode. I can't control it, its making me physically unwell.

>>37016494
Do I have to look at you in the eyes

>>37016356
Just put it on

This is proper dreg TV

>>37016578
Go with it you're close to becoming super saiyan 3

>>37016509

NNNEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRDDDDD

Jesus wept original for fucks sake

Over 400 isis fighters have returned home to Britain. Glad to know they are home and safe desu lads. Bet they've missed all that teenage white pussy

>>37016607
yeah I don't know what i'll do, its becoming unbearable and when I google symptoms I get emo/tumblr meme pages and lyrics instead of help

Love this meme

>>37016578
You need some bloody valium

>>37015803
2
2 biscuits with your tea in the evening

>>37016641
Listen to the bill burr podcast let his anger become yours
Https://youtube.com/watch?v=Kg2gYRTsrBY

>>37016350
teach english in asia
you make crazy money and don't

>no gf/bf feels completely disappeared for well over a year
>socialise with a lovey, dovey couple
>the feels come back again

Fuck off

http://www.jamieoliver.com/recipes/vegetable-recipes/black-bean-burgers/

Just made these lads.

They were bretty good ngl.

>>37016636

Plenty of it out there to, they go anywhere for authentic Hajii pole.

>>37016583

Only after I finish lad

>>37016494
If I give you blowjobs and my arse, do I get a room and proper bed?

>>37016705
it's peak how white women dont want anything to do with white boys no more lool

>>37016350

Join ISIS. Do the work of Allah (PBUH).

>>37016742

The best I can do is an air mattress in the loft

>>37016636
Young British Muslims think Isis fighters returning from Syria should be reintegrated into society, research finds

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/young-british-muslims-uk-isis-fighters-syria-return-reintegrate-society-research-a7682836.html

>15 mins into episode 1
>Picard has already gone beyond advised warp speed limits and is planning a suicidal saucer separation
Who promoted this mad man?

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Just had one of these

Literally one of the worst things I've ever tasted.

I've no fucking idea what the green leafy shit is, but it stinks, and tastes like burnt rubber

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>>37016636
>implying they wont be ghosted away to a government blacksite

>>37016808

Seems fair enough. They allow people who join the army back into the country, so why not these guys?

>>37016831
>Mixed baby
this triggers the /pol/

>>37016350
Get sectioned. They'll feed you for free.

>>37016808
>tfw no Trump PM to vote in and just sort all this shit out

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Cant wait to vote for a black man

>>37016831
It's called rocket and it's the second best leafy green, behind kale.

>>37016814
It's revealed later on, he had a near death experience that makes him a risk taker and spiritual successor to Kirk, which gets him promoted

>>37016904

Rocket is divine. Kale is animal fodder.

>>37016904
I must have had a bad batch then, because it felt like I was eating the leaves of an artificial plant

>>37016925
Wow spoiler alert

>>37016899
>a nig nog championing Surrey local history and tradition

Right...

>>37016955
Don't ask if you aren't ready for the answer

>>37016971
It obviously wasn't a genuine question. He was thinking out aloud

>>37016993
That's what twitter is for

>>37016967
He actually seems like an alright guy the green belt stuff alone is enough for me.

>>37017001
People who spoil things deserve to be sent to the gulag

>>37016930
Buy a bag of leafy kale, put it in a bowl, mix it with 1/2 tsp salt, 1-1/2 tsp sugar and one tbsp of a nut based oil.

Rip it all up and put it on tinfoil then chuck it in at 180 for 10-12 minutes.

You'll thank me.

>>37016854
Are you a Muslim or a lefty?

>>37017026
Tasha dies

>>37017043
I've seen every episode if everything ever but nice try

>>37017032

I'll just let the cows have it and eat the steak thanks.

>>37014074
>(***)

bloxo

>>37016967
why would this be weird?

>>37017041

whichever you're most afraid of.

>>37017043

Twice!

origami

Is Five Guys as nice as the normalfags make it out to be lads?

Can't go there for food because i'm allergic to nuts, but whenever someone mentions it they go wild about how great the food is.

>>37017222
No. I tried one and it was 16 quid down the fucking drain

>>37017222

No, it's just another burger place.

>>37017172
edgy and cool.

fedora tip

>>37017222
It's a greasy, overpriced pile of garbage

Unironically worse than McDonalds

>>37017222
Its to McDonalds what Nandos is to KFC.

>>37016676
>>37016104
>>37016069
am I the only person here who drinks a lot of tea and eats a lot of biscuits but doesn't eat them together

original

>>37017222

A beefburger is a beefburger.

>>37017245
>>37017249
>>37017265
>>37017286
>>37017310
Thanks lads, don't feel so bad about missing out now

>>37017286

Same shit with a different name?

>back at work in 13 hours

It's just not fair lads. Vote labour and save me from this hell.

>>37017329
Yes, exactly. But woth an extra few quid per meal.

>>37017351
Did my last day on Saturday now I'm living the NEET life hahahahahaha

>>37017306
tea is imperative, biscuits are dry so you need a drink to help them go down

>>37017411
I eat my biscuits with beer

>>37017351

Tomorrow I'm starting to get shit together for moving to France for the summer.

>>37017222
>Is Five Guys as nice as the normalfags make it out to be lads?
Nah it's overrated only like a few steps above a BK. Out of the chain places Byron and Honest

>>37017351
>tfw I can now work from home

Need to go in most days which is shit, but it'll be nice being able to do conference calls from bed one or twice a week.

>>37017462
fuck off normie

bloxo cube

>>37017535

No. Vegetable.

>kills himself with a car
>photo of the flower memorial has a hubcap in the background
Can't make this up
http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/man-22-tells-mum-im-8986373

>tfw can't kill myself because they'll blame depression and I know depression isn't real

>>37017627
>take antidepressants
>kill yourself

Yup

MONKEH

>>37017743
>anti depressants just give you motivation
>the only motivation depressed people have is to kill themselves

Who could've seen this coming?

>>37017798
GARLIC BREAD? *waits for applause*

>>37017817
terrible post

Peter Kay has nothing to do with monkey you fucking scumbag paki

fuck off

You ever see overweight people out on a run, going really slow with really bad form and a grimace on their face?

I see those people and I think of the difference between people whose bodies are shaped by exercise and people who exercise to TRY to shape their bodies. For instance athletes at olympic level: sure they go to the gym and do cardio to increase their stamina but the goal is to better themselves at their chosen sport. They are people who end up with cut, muscular bodies as a byproduct of something else that they choose to do because they enjoy.

But when I see fat people running I just know they think "oh I need to start running, that will help me lose weight and be the more attractive person I want to be" yet they're clearly fucking their knees up and having a horrible time running and not enjoying it. These fat people would be better off trying some group sports like tennis or some shit, to find something they enjoy. And then simply by playing tennis regularly and becoming someone who naturally incorporates exercise into their lifestyle they will become the person they want to be.

>>37017844
Same level of humour

>>37017798
AHM FAT

>>37017870
Peter Kay is great fuck off

bet you like Stewart Lee

>>>/reddit/

>>37017851
I don't really disagree with you, but at least they are trying.
I don't even hate fat people however the ones that moan about being fat and do nothing about it thoroughly piss me off.

>smacked my thumb whilst hammering the fence
>bone feels weird now

Builders on youtube make it look so easy, 1/5 of the nails I hammered are bent too.

>08:00 shift tomorrow
>up at 04:55 because I'm a commutecuck

should really be in bed sleeping right thus second

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>>37017798
oo you're 'ard

>>37017851
You make an excellent point. I will never exercise again

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Who else here will never forgive themselves?

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>mum told me my dentist appoinment is at 9:40am tommorow

I haven't had time to prepare lads

>>37018113
>pop a benzo an hour before you go

all the prep you need right there la'

>>37017911
Stewart Lee is an intellectual comedian that you need a certain IQ to understand.

REALLY need my boipucci filled lads

Need some delicious man milk inside me

When Stewart live got fat after living off crisps I knew he was one of us.

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>>37018113
When was the last time you brushed your teeth?

>mfw I was muted for 1 minute 4 seconds because my comment wasn't original

>>37018187
There's nothing good about having cum in you. It's one of those things that should stay strictly in fantasy.

>always go to bed at 9pm
>havent stayed up late in years

thinking of treating myself today and staying up until like 1am lads

>>37018215
Today but I went for years without brushing them, only started a few months ago. Haven't been to dentist in like 8 years

>>37018221
>There's nothing good about having cum in you

exactly right now let's get all that hot sticky cum out of those pent up balls of yours shall we hmm?

>>37018228
How on earth have you managed to keep that up?

>>37018228
Not worth it, it'll just fuck up your sleeping pattern and before you know it you'll end up like me staying up all night and sleeping all day.

The only benefit is around the middle of next month when you can witness it getting light early.

i've had a dry cough that only happens in the evening, had it for about a week now, is it just some form of hayfever? i've heard coughs are just symptoms and never a standalone thing, help me lads

>>37018177
He just says the same thing over and over again

>>37018187

How tedious.

What does sucking cock feel like? Genuinely curious

>>37018252
ive always been an early riser, get up at half 5 every morning

i honestly think 4chan is delusional about normies, at least normies in Britain. from my experience with normies, most of them are quite reserved and shy when you first meet them. i was at a party yesterday and a lot of the time people would shy away when i randomly spoke to them. obviously normies are not as quiet or shy as some people on here but they are definitely not super charismatic or confident.

think i've got a new fetish lads

fucking a fleshlight/sex toy thats freshly being used by another man and still has his hot sticky cum in

>>37018301
>a lot of the time people would shy away when i randomly spoke to them
What did you scream at them?

>>37018301

That or they just thought you were a cunt and felt awkward about having to acknowledge your existence.

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>>37018301
>i was at a party yesterday and a lot of the time people would shy away when i randomly spoke to them

Because they are all part of a secret club and you aren't, that's why normans don't talk to people like us.

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>>37018323
You can use my onahole right after I do if you want lad.

>>37018277
I used to get dry coughs in the evening until I realised my throat was just dry. I sit at my computer for long times without getting up for a drink. Maybe you're experiencing something similar?

>>37018299
Honestly?

Not much. It's just skin, and a bit salty if they're pre-cumming

Blowjobs are almost entirely psychological.

Havent had me knob polished for many a year lads

>>37017911
>Dissing based Stew in the britfeel thread
Spot the fucking newfag

>>37018294
So does Garlic Bread Man but you wank off over him because you understand it

>>37018430

It's a blow in from /pol/

I think it misses it's kameraden.

GARLIC BRED!

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>GPU so hot is starts making games stutter
>Wont engage it's fans

Why do I always have to manually control a GPUs fan speed? I've had several cards like this. You;ll see them at 70c and the fan hasn't even started spinning.

>>37018301

Yeah, I've found that too.
Just about get a semi-decent conversation out of my colleagues.

Even more so, when you propose the sentiment of kindling a friendship with them. They look upon the idea as though you've admitted to eating babies.

>>37018493
Shitty bitty mobo lad

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>>37018467
GARLE?.... BROD!
*waits for comedy award*

>>37018536
What the fucks the motherboard got to do with the GPU?

>>37018550
>What the fucks this thing I plug this other thing into got to do with the other thing
GEEE
I
WONDER
ANON
IT
SURE
IS
A
MYSTERY

As someone from Bolton, I ask that everyone here insulting R LAD Peter Kay to go and do one.

You can insult Vernon Kay though. The guys a prick.

>>37018437
Pear cider maid from 100 percent pears
Pear cider maid from 100 percent pears
Pear cider maid from 100 percent pears
Pear cider maid from 100 percent pears
Pear cider maid from 100 percent pears
Pear cider maid from 100 percent pearsPear cider maid from 100 percent pearsPear cider maid from 100 percent pearsPear cider maid from 100 percent pears
Pear cider maid from 100 percent pearsPear cider maid from 100 percent pearsPear cider maid from 100 percent pears
v
v
vPear cider maid from 100 percent pearsPear cider maid from 100 percent pears
vv

vv
vPear cider maid from 100 percent pears
vv
v
Pear cider maid from 100 percent pearsvv!!!!111!!!!1111

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>>37018584
>maid
The intelligence of the average Peter Kay fan everyone.

>>37018584
The diffrernce is that Lee isn't intending for the audience to laugh at that... unlike Kay who thhinks his accent combined with the phrase "garlic bread" is comedy gold.

IT'S SPITTIN'
*receives MBE*

The absolute STATE of britfeel right now lads baka tbqhwyf

>>37018637
This lad gets it.

>>37018666
Just be happy goodfellas anon has fucked off and stopped trying to racebait in new ways

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>Free weekend of a game on steam
>Time has expired
>Game still let;s you play until you try and restart the game
>Keep game open forever