Repressed memories

>>36934499
Con't
>one time my siblings played a prank on me when I got home. They locked me out of the house and pretended not to know who I was. I ran away and cried for hours until a police officer saw me and drove me home after I explained what happened. Dad beat us all as punishment

>at one point we decided to adopt another cat, for god knows what reason. I end up torturing the poor thing to insanity. Whenever a person got too close to it, it attacked them like their life depended on it, and desperately tried to escape every time someone opened a door in the house

>one time I decided to see how long I could go without opening my mouth. I went 6 days before my sister asked my asked me if there was supposed to be anything better on TV

>after my parents divorce my mom locked herself in her room, and refused to leave. She would just cry loudly all day. This went on for MONTHS. Literally the only thing to eat in the house was frozen pizza, since the oldest one in the house was 15 at the time. It got so bad we had to ask our dad to take custody

>>36934723
Con't
>had to get sent to a mental hospital at one point after a suicide attempt. End up getting paired with a roommate who apparently was not only gay, but also sexually attracted to 12 year old boys. End up getting molested by him. He said if I tell anyone, he would kill himself. Next night, same shit happens again. Make up some shit to the hospital staff and insist I change rooms

This is all i can remember at this point off the top of my head. If I remember more, and if people are interested I can post more, but I feel really tired after writing all this.

>>36934499
Haha, I'm glad my only repressed memories are of my dad yelling at me and telling me he'd give me something to cry about if I didn't 'stop'.

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Are you doing okay now? That's all that matters.

>>36934904
Unfortunately not. I've been forced to move back into my mothers basement, because I can't afford an apartment on minimum wage. The It Gets Better meme turns out is a lie, since I'm still depressed. The only emotion I ever really feel is a subtle dysphoria. And to top it off I've started to hallucinate. my family has a history of schizophrenia...

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>>36934961
Shit dude. I'm happy you have a job though. At least It Got Better in a way. It could Get Worse.
What are you hallucinating about?

Maybe we could go hunting Bad Dads together in the future? Make them pay for what they've done.

>>36935109
Thanks for the words of encouragement. I doubt I'll ever find a 3D waifu, but if I do have kids I'll make sure to be a damn good father

Also my hallucinations haven't been so bad at this point. It happens mostly just before I go to bed. For the most part it's just little flashes of light, or objects look like they're floating out of the corner of my eye. On a few occasions I thought I saw centipedes crawling on the walls, or a face looking at me in the window, but it none of it really effects my day to day life. But if it does end up to be schizophrenia, it will get worse

>>36934499
>repressed memories
I don't really get what those are, I have such a clear memory of my childhood, good and bad parts. This is something that happened sorta on topic:

>be 12, have a rape fetish
>people on 4chan/online friends all agree "anon, you probably got raped in your childhood, you probably just repressed the memory"
>REEE IF I GOT RAPED I WOULDNT BE FETISHIZING IT, YOU LITERALLY DONT KNOW ME, WHO ARE YOU TO SAY WHAT HAPPENED IN MY CHILDHOOD?

>>36935287
I don't know if it has anything to do with my molestation, but I am attracted to lolis. However traps repulse me just a little

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>>36935243
I have some hallucinations when I'm dead tired or half asleep too. I do have history of schizophrenia as well. This one time I kept waking up and looking at my wall and seeing a path of ants climbing up and it looked so real. I even got up half asleep and got close to the wall and saw them. They weren't really there when I woke up though.

I also notice things the corner of my eyes and look quickly.

I say it's nothing serious. Sure a mental breakdown might make things worse, as does getting dead tired.

But if I may say so, I think that the worst has passed in a way. You no longer have to deal with shitty kid brothers, and hopefully not your angry dad that you can't fight back even on emotional levels. I hope you learn a lot about a lot of things. And don't let the dead cats bother you. They return to the earth, as you will also.

>>36935344
being attracted to lolis has a lot to do with a lot of things. They are people who you can influence a lot for once(the 3D ones). Also even if it's fucked up, females are attractive.
As long as you don't prey on actual people, or endorse doing so...

Though I don't recommend having children of your own.

>>36935371
>I do have history of schizophrenia as well
by this I mean in my family

>>36934499
>Cat takes refuge in garage where it eventually licks up some anti freeze, and dies

Cats and domestic animals are so fucking stupid and useless holy shit. Your father actually did you a favor on this one.

>>36935471
I always thought 3D lolis and actual children are gross. I would never actually go out and attack a little girl

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>>36935544
We created them! They don't even go to school. It probably smelled like tuna.

>>36935544
Do you know how many kids poison themselves with antifreeze every year?

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>>36935571
Good for they must be protected.

Though actual kids can be annoying as shit and mess up everything they touch. but then we're getting into bad dad territory where we get pissed at the dumb kids. God if dogs are annoying to take care of can you imagine a kid. Not saying this is an excuse to be a bad parent but you HAVE TO BE SURE you can do it.

>>36935648

I guess it's a shitload of kids. That being said, kids are fucking retarded too, but they have a chance to grow out of it. Or become a useless NEET like myself, who knows. Maybe I should have drank some antifreeze likethose stupid domestic animals.

>>36934814
A few more before I go to sleep for a few hours

>after divorce I remember my mom crying to me. Talking about how much and talking to me about how much everything was ruined for her, and how much she regrets marrying dad, and how she wish she never had kids. Then she started pressing me for answers. I was like 10.

>another time when I was little, I was playing, and I accidently broke a window. My body was covered with cuts and I was bleeding bad. To this day I can still see some of the scars after I get out of a shower. My mom was barely done bandaging me up when my dad beat my for breaking a window and rough housing.

Anyone else is free to vent about their childhood. If the breads still alive when I wake up in a couple of hours I might remember some more.

>>36935871
You been through some shit. I must be a big pussy for having suicidal thoughts

>>36934499
>be me, 5 to 10 years old, my oldest brother molest and rapes me for months
>Tell my dad about that(i doesn't even know what my brother is doing with me) and he start a conversation with my brother
>My brother knowing that i tell dad about that he continued doing it
>he always beat me up for any reason

>>36935871
I've been through something similar

>after divorce my mom crying to me makes me call dad
>''We want you back dad''

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>>36936095
>tfw mom makes my step dad call me to apologize for what he did to me while they were together and that it was unforgivable
>the worst he did was lecture me about sun tzu for a few hours and look mean

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>>36934499
Holy shit OP thats a rough life for sure. Life will get better when you gain financial independence. My repressed memories are pretty frivilous shit compared to this but I'll share anyway:
>from 18 - 20 i was in an intense gay relationship with my best friend
>I had convinced myself I was going to die soon and it was better to fuck my best mate instead of die a virgin loser
>this guy was suicidal and emotionally manipulative to the extreme
>he set down so many rules it was hard to keep up eg. Dont talk to women for more than 5 mins, dont drink more than 2 beers, dont talk to these people i dont approve of, only wear these clothes, be home by 5.30pm at the latest, etc
>i didnt realise how fucked this whole thing had gotten until I was completely poor and vulnerable
>dropped out of uni
>at that point I was living on his bedroom floor
>the only thing that made life bearable was the occaisional hardcore ass pounding I'd give this guy.
>started slangin dope to save money
>got a job and saved more money
>lined up a job across the country as far away as I could get
>came in his boipucci balls deep one last time
>the next day pack my bags, tell him fuck you im leaving and dont ever try to contact me ever again, then head to the airport.
That felt pretty amazing. I'm a completely different person now thankfully (only interested in women now), much more confident and happy but I needeed to repress all those memories so I could reinvent myself.

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>>36936509
>the only thing that made life bearable was the occaisional hardcore ass pounding I'd give this guy.
>the next day pack my bags, tell him fuck you im leaving and dont ever try to contact me ever again, then head to the airport.
That's fucking crazy. Glad you got yourself together.

I want to be commandeered by faggot officer though.