"I would be a Chad if" thread

If I didn't have cripplingly low self esteem

>>36912362
I originally lost weight

>>36912362
If I were taller ;_;

>>36912362
i had a dad

If I were a completely different person

If I didn't have severe eczema

There's too many IF's to list, it's a total train wreck desu

>better diet and exercise
>social skills

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>>36912362
lf I didn't have ocd

>>36912362
If i didnt have an internet addiction

>>36912362
If I didn't have assburgers.
Otherwise I already look like Chad.

>>36912479
same here, I'm >>36912434

Shit sucks

>>36912362
If I wasn't a mentally ill compulsive masturbator.

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I had a bigger dick. 4.5 reporting in

>>36912479
Do you have a big dick? How big?

>if I had less autism

I'm a pretty awesome guy otherwise. Maybe I could stand to gain a few pounds, but girls like the feminine otter mode guys now anyway.

>>36912516
That fuggin suggs

>tfw 5'11.5''
If I were half an inch taller

If I got over my alcoholism.

>>36912566
>also the same height
I know that feeling anon, we're so close it hurts.
>tfw feel like a god when i'm wearing boots

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>>36912362
if I had a job

I would be a chad if I was an entirely different person and retained no aspects from my past self

>>36912362
If I could just be myself.
Origami.

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>>36912362
My Dad didnt leave.
I am very close to being a Chad, however I lack qualities that one develops from have a Father.
>being assertive, stern
>being productive and getting shit done
>self-confidence, not giving a fuck what people think of you

Because my Dad wasnt around, I still struggle with these things as a 22 year old man.

>>36912362
I'd be Tyrone if I wasn't a skinny fat weeaboo white washed black bot

>>36912362
I owned a loaded gun

>>36912362
I would be a Chad if I had a modicum of self control.

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>>36912566
>complains about being almost 6 inches
>tfw 5'7

>>36912362
If I didn't have an ugly face

the only reasonable answer
/thread

Crooked teeth, loose skin and stretch marks

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If I wasn't an autistic sperg as a child
If my parents weren't military and moved around so much that making friends and figuring out social cues wasn't even more difficult
If I'd joined a masculine sport as a child and stuck with it
If I didn't start balding at the age of 18

>>36912362

If I learned how to socialize with girls

I would be a Chad if" I wasn't female.

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>>36912362
if i wasnt genetically fucked on pretty much ever level

i couldn't do it family.
probably no mental illness would be a good start.

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>>36912362
If be a Stacy if I had better skin. I have acne, backne, and body/facial hair where a girl shouldn't have it

better hair
personality

If i had a couple millions bank account

>>36912362
If i weren't fat and mentally ill

>>36912362
H E l G H T
E
I
G
H
T

Literally if I was just born more masculine, with a more masculinised brain and body. I've been a weak and feminine little faggot ever since I was old enough to walk and talk. I'm not even good looking enough to convert to a trap either

>>36912362
if I was taller and better looking
>tfw people pretend it matters if Chad has personality defects

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>>36914059
iktf

original1212

if I could have talked to her today instead of shying away

>>36912362
If I wasn't a moral fag that has a bizarre dualistic fetish between having control and letting a woman control/tease me.

>>36913800
You sound like you would make a good friend though

I would be a chad if I wasn't actually a degenerate of a human being. Like, I think I'm actually just an evil person. I tend to only enjoy situations where I feel more powerful/superior to others and do not pursue activities due to any inherent enjoyment in them.

I want to cuck someone

If I had any charisma and was outgoing. Im not good at flirting and im too shy to approach girls.

if I was born as good looking as the rest of my family and I got to keep my current personality i'd be 20 and married instead of 20 and khv

Hello, all

Just letting you know, if you got money to buy drugs you can go talk to a doctor to get help. I recently just broke down in front of my doc and they prescribed anti-depressants, I think im going to be drugged in to being a chad.

If i didn't have erectile dysfunction.

>>36912422
The only correct answer ITT and you have dubs to prove it.

>>36912362
I wasn't born with a weak chin, a downright hideous nose, and severe autism.

>>36914332
yeah I did the same with a counselor and she was completely prepared to recommend xanax or whatever. I was too scared to go for a followup so I decided to be my own therapist and it's helped with my disassociation and anxiety

>>36912362
If my parents hadn't moved me to Europe when I was 12. We used to be the sporty kids, I did track and they had rugby, lacrosse, and football. All my American friends grew to be massive chads with hot girlfriends and cool jobs. One of them is a professional photographer now. When I moved to europe I got beat up all the time because I never spoke the language. One of them even tried to drown me, before a teacher helped me. I developed massive anxiety and got panic attacks. I got fat and became a shut-in. No one talked to me in high school. It became too much and I tried committing suicide. I was out for a week, and the next monday I walked in and everyone was laughing at me and mocking me for attempting suicide. It turns out my roastie sister told her friends and it grew from there. I hated them all, started self medicating, dropped out and was a junkie for years. I'm only now recovering and trying to fit back into "society", but I get disgusted every time I see another person. I get anxiety from talking to them, and rather just go out in a bang and murder everyone I know and as many randoms as possible, but SJW's would have a field day with my whiteness. I just want a shitskin to kill me, so I can become a victim, and that way someone will care.

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>>36912362
I would be a Chad if I didn't have REALLY skew teeth as a kid.

They're fixed now. I'm /fit/ as fuark, and great in male company, but never got over my complex talking/interacting with women. I just can't do it.

>>36912362
I didn't say no origino

>>36913800
Same. I can be pretty non-autistic sometimes tho.

>>36914045
Liar.

Obirigeno

If hell froze over
Origin

>>36914167
You say that, but you never know. ;)

>>36914452
How dare you make smug cat into one of your crying bitch meme cats >:(

I wasn't balding and poor with no skills

A better Nose, mouth, Hair and why not throw some better cheekbones while I am at it.

>>36912362
I don't think any of us could be a "Chad". We are who we are. The "problems" that we think are holding us back are just mere excuses we created just to fool ourselves from the reality that we are indeed fucked. Take whatever you think is your problem. If that was solved, another one will creep up and you'll just start blaming that for all your shortcomings. Solve that and another one will pop up. The thing is, we are the problems. We are the common denominator. Hard to swallow, but there you go

If I didn't have narcolepsy

>>36912422
/thread

Originality is not mandatory

>>36912422
pretty much this, dubs say so
origisdfjksdf

>>36915211
Just the opposite. Many could be Chads but are too lazy to make the effort to become one.

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>>36914866
This is what I get for opening up :(

>>36915415
yep, keep telling yourself that. makes it easier

I wasn't a DYEL beta

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>>36912479
>Otherwise I already look like Chad.
I don't see any proof

>>36914452
Fucking fag.
Go be a bitch somewhere else, because it's pretty obvious you don't deserve to be on /r9k/.

>if i went out sometimes in high school instead of playing vidya all the time

>>36912362

If I saw a mental health professional about my issues.

what the fuck is a chad anyway, I've never seen one RL

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had this really high-pitched shriek-y voice until age 14 that just did a number on my self-esteem/got me made fun of. Other kids would always try to goad me into saying something or pretending they didn't hear me to get me worked up and speaking in an even higher tone. My voice ended up being really low-pitched but there's a part of my brain that still things people are making fun of me if i'm asked to repeat myself.

Other than that, I wish my dad hadn't discouraged me from sports and given real advice on the nature of women instead of bee yourself crap.

I did pretty decently in the looks genetic lottery(6 ft tall, green eyes, strong jaw, broad shoulders) so I'm probably a Chad in an alternate universe.

>>36912362
If I didn't have an abusive family and wasn't a half nigger

I think, maybe, if I wasn't so empathetic, I'd be a Chad

>>36914438
what european country did oyu move to?

>>36915211
Idk bro I was a Chad in middle school had all the girls interested was friends with all the high ranking males, considered their peer or even higher then my poor retarded parents move me too another town and my status disappeared.. didn't even want to play sports with the kids I didn't know and who seemed to hate me from the start so became a loner/stoner got with a few girls but I'll never know where I'd be if I stayed in the town where I was king

>>36912362
I would be a Chad if I wouldn't've been born premature.

>>36914332
>taking drugs that cause perma brain damage

>>36915716
>you don't deserve to be on /r9k/
But why?

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>>36915872

Yeah, I know that feel.

I mean, I know I should randomly ignore texts to seem mysterious/busy, invoke jealousy, etc but it just seems sick to mess with someone's emotions like that.

>>36915995
You're too good for this world, anon, and that makes you a fucking faggot.

>>36912362
If I were completely different person

Newsflash guys, being muscular won't help you become a chad in any way shape or form if you're still socially autistic. Just look at all the pseudo-chads who are husky

I'm a Chad already. It's not that good, sometimes you just want to laugh and most other Chad's are not funny, you do fun stuff, I went climbing this weekend and then we got drunk at the river with a group of girls we met, but people is too interested in doing fun stuff. It's fun and fine but not as good as you guys pretend, people in med school is even worse boring as fuck.

>I was taller
>I had social skills

That's about all that bars me from being Chad I think. I'm pretty good looking, dress well, big dingus, only I'm a shy autismo manlet who rarely gets laid and thus will always remain at the sad lower end of the normie spectrum

>>36912362
If I didn't take antipsychotics.

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I need to wear classes and im only 182 cm tall.

>>36916209
It's just your autismo. There are plenty of Chads your height, stop making excuses.

>>36916316
Hey man, you know, there's this thing called "contact lenses". Maybe if you got them you'd see that you needed a lot more to become Chad (such as a better haircut)

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>>36916316
glasses


I am Original

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>>36912422
>>36912522
>>36912566
>>36913800
>>36914033
>>36915122
>>36915211
>>36915733
>>36915833

Blessed thread. Highly original.

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>>36916352
My eyes are to bad for this.

>>36914438
What European language would ever be very difficult?

>>36916464
He's too smart to learn other languages. And too smart to fix his life.

I would been a chad if I wasn't such a faggot

>>36912362
if I had thicker hair

>>36916346
How do I learn to quit being a sperg

>6'0
>natural muscle
>but 256lbs
if i wasnt a fatass i would be turbochad tier

>>36915415
There's no such thing as "becoming" a Chad

>>36916539
>there's muscle under all this fat I swear!

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If my father wasnt originally bipolar and actually taught me how to be a human fucking being and didnt yell at me and neglect me

>>36912362
If I didn't feel like being a wagecuck was the ultimate form of modern day slavery. I literally cannot work any job for more then a day and not think I'm the ultimate loser. Work is for slaves, NEETs are superior.

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>>36916581
oh yeah and if he didnt originally kill himself and cause a lot of my family's emotional problems

>>36912362
if I were 6'3 I would have drowned in pussy a long time ago

>>36916537
Practice. The spaghetti in your pockets is not unlimited. Every time you spill some, less will refill. Eventually you will have low spaghetti spilling out of your pockets.

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i would be chad if i wasn't ginger

>>36913961
Yes, true. I can dress nice, I'm into weight lifting, I play sports. Why just so god damn ugly.

>>36915912
anxiety and depression cause worse brain damage

>>36912362
Not been self aware. I have everything I need but I'm not able to produce fake confidence.

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>>36912362
i would be a Chad if i lobotomize myself and change my way off thinking and living

>>36916926
You're handsome, intelligent, charming, funny, rich? But you're either 5' or 6'9"?

>>36917209
>le self aware meme

You're actually less self aware than the average person. If you weren't, you would know how to use your self-awareness to make yourself into a Chad.

ITT: Ton's of physical excuses. 99% of you would look normal albiet a bit unattractive, if you groomed and took care of yourself.

Even then, how you look doesn't determine if you're a chad. Unless you're a solid 8/9/10 in the face, you can't skirt by without having social skills.

>>36917263
And not even good looks will help if you're a sperg. Plenty of khv robots are decent-looking or with the potential to be but lack the other aspects.

>>36912362
If I were tall.

>>36917467
Are you just samefagging this retarded meme 5 times in this same thread already?

>>36915872
>>36915995
>reeeeeeee bitches roasties whores
>I hate women die all of you for not having sex with me
>It's all because I'm too nice, if I didn't have so much empathy, if I were an asshole, I'd be totally drowning in pussy

>>36915881
well you my friend are a failed normie

>>36912403
this, im considerably good looking but my 5'7 stature holds me back. At least im bulky and not scrawny

>>36917695
If you were good-looking, you'd be swimming in pussy. You're either lying or you're leaving out the actual details. Are you a fat neckbeard sperglord NEET by any chance?

was taller and more confident I guess

Had terrible acne

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i would be chad if i didnt have an ugly, small penis with pic related and mild phimosis AND small balls

literally everything that could go wrong with my junk went wrong. i've rejected female advances/blowjobs and it's why im still a KV

cant fix it all but im working on the phimosis part and saving up to have those little shit pearls removed

FUCK MAN. JUST, FUCK.

>>36913757
My dad was always around and is basically an agressive alpha. He tried to teach me to be what you described but ended turning me into a beta fag... that is scared of everything

>>36917864
how small are we talking about? like in inches

>>36914356
have you tried L-Arginine?

>>36917969
4" long by 3.5" girth

looks even smaller on my frame since im 6'3"/180lbs, semi-/fit/

>>36912566
From where I am that's not necessarily small. I am 5'10" and it's a decent height here

>>36917123
5'8" here. Drowning in pussy.

>>36912362
Gave a shit about things like that

>>36912362
If I were confident

If I wasnt a paranoid mind freak.
Although I started compulsively picking my hairs out so now I'm gonna be bald soon too.
Oh well

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If I didn't spend so much of my abundance of free time enjoying my time as a hobby diplomat and exploring new ways to entertain myself as a NEET. Maybe if I were a wagie I would have the time and energy to go be a Chad but i'd rather spend my time napping and endulging myself.

I was taller and not some anti-social loser.
I'm fairly fit, I have good jaw and all that, but its all wasted with me being short.

>>36916316
>only 182 cm tall.
you have to be kidding me. This is ideal height.

>>36912362
If I was taller
didn't have a baby face
wasn't autistic
had a smaller nose
didn't have a fucked up mouth

>>36912362
My chin was symmetrical and I would move to another town and acquire taste in clothing

>>36912362
If I hadn't lost my legs I probably wouldn't be a chad but I'd be a lot more confident

>>36912362
My grandpa was a Chad. My uncle on that side of the family is a Chad. My bio father is tall but slender, and I am slender too. I also am pretty autistic and have bad socialization skills. But at least I have a large member and a masculine face. No jawline though. I'm too honest to manipulate women. I guess I am not a Chad for those reasons.

I would be a Chad if I weren't so fat, stupid, lazy and ugly.

>>36919610
l bet ya would big boy

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>>36912362
If I didn't have acne and acne scars.

>>36919975
Post ur acnepucci pls

>>36912362
i wasnt born with a cleft lip and above 5'6

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>>36912362
...if I wasn't a lanklet. I'm 6' with a masculine face but I'm 138 lbs exactly.

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>>36920022
N-no. I've been told on separate occasions that I would be good-looking had it not been for my hideous acne scars.

>>36920721
Just wear makeup broo

>>36920068
Hit the weights zbd start eating right, with hadditional work you'll get mad puss

>>36920760
I'm not sure if that would help. Even then, I'm don't have the slightest clue with applying makeup.

>>36914438
>I just want a shitskin to kill me, so I can become a victim, and that way someone will care.
>implying

>>36920068
>138 lbs
For the life of me I don't understand how a guy can weigh less than 170lbs, bare minimum.

I'm 5'10 and when I was 170lbs I was a skinny fucking faggot with no muscle. Are you missing ribs? How is it physically possible?

>>36912362
If I were...
>Taller
>Smarter
>/fit/ter
>Handsomer
>More likable
>More sociable

Basically if I were anyone other than me. Since I, apparently, score close to 0 in all those categories.

>>36912362
if i had straight teeth and knew how to wash my face in high school

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>>36914059
>body/facial hair
this, my biggest problem why i cant become stacy in general is because im unnaturally hairy (dark hair on light skin) and have hair in a short bob cut

also im a mentally ill puppet enthusiast who dresses like annie wilkes

>>36912362

If my growth wasn't stunted.
My parents put me on medications that destroyed my testosterone production when I was 14 years old, and I continued taking them until well after adolescence was over.

>>36920929

6'2" 150lbs here.
I've been 140lbs before.
Men don't have equal bone mass. That's how it's possible. My bones are literally thinner than my mother's because I had a shitty diet and low testosterone during puberty. My wrists are only like 6.25 inches circumference, my shoulders are only around 17 inches wide.

>>36912362
if i could talk to people ;(
i'm 6'5'' handsome well paying job white
but..

If i just didnt think so much and just did what i had to do

I didn't have a speech impediment.