Descent into Robot Madness

I realised that no matter how much weight I lose or how confident I become, I'll always be treated differently because I'm ugly. I've lost almost 50 pounds, put on muscles so most people comment on it, changed my eating and clothing habits and fixed my style up but it doesn't mean shit.

Every time I talk to women, I come off as a really friendly guy as opposed to someone they'd ever want to date and my looks never helped. I've tried tinder and the only people who like me back make me feel sick gross because their overweight or have no care for their looks .

I just started at a new job and I'm already seeing people lose interest in me as a potential friend because I'm so autistic. It hurts knowing no matter how hard I try, I can never have normal social skills and average looks.

Started to a little, but then realized that this board's culture is toxic as fuck and acts as an enabler to be a loser

>>36806831
This x 100 desu senpai oregano

File: Gt+aluminum+_af785be43d7769ba553b208185879744.jpg (21KB, 600x630px) Image search: [Google]

21KB, 600x630px

>>36806513
Personality. Introvert. It's obvious to everyone I don't go out very often. Fail at interviews despite trying to fake it. Rarely meet girls, and asking one out bombed hard. Lonely. Depressed.

>>36806513
Finding furry porn when I was 12. I have literally zero hope.

>>36806513
Realizing that the problem is in my mind, I'm the one who is wrong and can't get his shit together. No matter how much money I could get, surgeries, courses to learn to speak, etc. I simply won't be normal.

My parents divorced and so i moved with my mother to another city, i'm a mulatto so i'm dark skinned and this city was closer to the center of the country where people were whiter so this led to me being labelled as the "darkie" which i didn't like, light bullying coupled with the fact i was shy to begin with led to isolation and it all just spiraled downward from there

>>36806513
My family is full of Chads who accomplished great things. If I had been born into an average family maybe I would've been OK since I'm a very average person but living in multiple shadows of every male family member has somehow fucked me up.

I realized the world is frostbite, and only takes in the end, including your life.

File: Ugly Filthy Pervert.png (338KB, 531x473px) Image search: [Google]

338KB, 531x473px

>>36806513
For me, it was when I dropped out of college and lived too far away from any family to rely on them.

File: pingahmoon.png (150KB, 272x276px) Image search: [Google]

150KB, 272x276px

Realizing that I'll probably never be able to leave this mindset where everything about being alive feels so incredibly disorienting. The idea of becoming a functional member of society is so distant that it doesn't even seem like a valid thing to strive for.

I'm a socially dysfunctional ugly manlet, or maybe not ugly, at this point I can't tell and even if I could it wouldn't make a difference. I feel ugly, both inside and out, and I'm realizing that's more than likely just a fundamental aspect of my being rather than a temporary state. I just hate myself so much it makes me want to scream.

>>36806513
being a manlet
seriously
being ridiculed and given less opportunities than the average person, receiving undeserved adversity because of something I could never change made me feel powerless over other aspects of my life, which eventually led me here
although i wouldn't end it yet. i'm a hedonistic monster now

>>36806513
constant social failure resulting in either being ostracized or being the retard/mascot of the group throughout the entirety of my school years, caused by being mentally stuck at 10 or so and never making the transition from adventures, curiosity, and fantasy to sex, drugs, and jobs

tldr everyone became a faggot in middle school

>>36807375
I basically agree with this post minus the self-hatred. Being a normie is such a foreign concept to me that I can't even comprehend it. I feel like a retarded alien. I just don't get it. Why do they do the things they do? It's a mystery.

File: 1493324611933.gif (9KB, 343x316px) Image search: [Google]

9KB, 343x316px

>>36807173
>7

same here. i always wonder what would have happened if i hadn't come across it and hentai when i was so young. would i be a normie now?

>>36806513
The straw the broke my camel's back was when I became a NEET after dropping out from uni. Now I'm trying to crawl my way back doing whatever dirty deeds I can.

I can work on my appearance, but it is meaningless if you don't go out, don't start talking to people.
People won't give you the time of day if you don't have status or friends which I don't have and frankly I don't care much about them.
They don't share my interests and most of my interests are best done alone.

File: 1485938370733.jpg (32KB, 233x316px) Image search: [Google]

32KB, 233x316px

>>36806513
Going to, and subsequently failing University. Really fucked me up.

>>36806513
>What caused your descent down the tragic world of robotism.
humans

File: 1431.jpg (25KB, 221x228px) Image search: [Google]

25KB, 221x228px

A combination of being blackpilled, social anxiety, and failing all my hobbies.

>Tfw completely ready to be homeless when I fail to pay my rent next month
I don't care.

File: 1463427851490-r9k.jpg (21KB, 326x255px) Image search: [Google]

21KB, 326x255px

i just wasn't made for this world

>>36806513
I realized all men are fundamentally the same and most women my age actually are vapid cunts.

>>36807823
>will probably become homeless sooner rather than later cause trumps making it harder to be poor
>only small comforts like video games or a comfy bed to sleep in keep me going now
>homelessness means i'll lose these comforts
>will probably just blow my brains out somewhere nice

Starting in the school system

File: pepemask.jpg (110KB, 454x510px) Image search: [Google]

110KB, 454x510px

>>36807989

It's whatever for me. I don't really need 24/7 entertainment, vidya is no longer fun for me either. I'll browse r9k in a library. I'll dumpsterdive. Whatever. I'm far beyond giving a shit.

>>36806513
I've always been this pathetic, as long as I remember, girls have been telling me to avert my eyes from them.

I always knew i had weak genetics and i was overall a mediocre person. There was never one moment i just found out i was a robot. I was just little and saw that other guys were better at sports, did better in school and had girls chase them on the playground.

I use to care. Now i just pretty much dont give a fuck about anything.

File: 1492965241062.jpg (94KB, 600x505px) Image search: [Google]

94KB, 600x505px

>>36806513
All through middleshool I was the white kid that sit in the back corner of the classroom drawing and letting my mind wander. I thought of great things I would become so I could out do everyone who bullied me.
Highschool comes along and I drop out because my family just didn't give a shit anymore, bro lets me live with him and he pays the bills. My mother never got my birth certificate, social security, or any other forms of identification so I couldn't and can't get a State ID, Driver's license, etc. I can't apply for a job so my brother pays the bills.
This scenario has lasted for years now, and the only place I ever found solace was r9k and a few other boards I would browse most of my time so I could talk to people who weren't normal, people like me.

File: 1488986080317.png (598KB, 1024x737px) Image search: [Google]

598KB, 1024x737px

>>36806513
Im very dumb, and was naive back in my teenage years.
In America, wether it be in the competetive work world, or the public school system, your fate commonly falls in other peoples hands.
I was switched from an all white school to an all black/mexican school.
Ill never see minorities the same way again.
Hell even in my previous schools i was always picked last for sport activities, or simply ignored by kids my own age.
Ive been truly alone all my life and i never could choose what i wanted to happen with my life.
I had to switch middle schools twice for being too dumb, and switched highschools 4 times due to being mugged and put into a victim protection program so many times.
Ive only ever seen what brings the worst out of people, maybe thats why im always at my worst, constantly quick to judge, thinking of what in the room around me can be used to bash the head of the normie in front of me with, my feelings of helplessness and despair.
I just want to sleep bros, im so tired of it all.
I want to go home.

I'm just disgusting