Hello, everybody. What's on your mind? Let it out.

>>36806211
II'm thinking of being an hero. Nothing new here on this board. Other than that, I also got a new hair tie. It looks very pretty.

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fuck, i forgot about this gif

>>36806260
don't kill yourself you idiot

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>tfw all the memes here have rendered me an anxious mess
>cant have an hour pass without looking at a mirror to comfort myself a bit since I am convinced that I look like a subhuman manlet freak
>feel shittier every time I have to work and be surrounded by people
>feel pain behind my eyes, scalp tingling and heart beating faster especially around a crowd of people during the meetings
>cant speak clearly without my voice fading into a mumble
>always harbor suspicions about others talking behind my back exacerbated by that one time I confirmed it when I was in a restroom stall and they were talking about how creepy my antisocial habits are
>only form of social interaction I have is with anonymous strangers on an anime imageboard since I can't even talk to my own family and I ghosted my only friend out of paranoia

I used to be marginally functional when I was fat and didn't give a shit about how I present myself to people. I vowed to change, and I did but that only served to make my insecurities and anxities worse. I don't think I even have any disorders or shit like that. I just wish I was a NEET again. Conforming to society's standard is just not in me. I'm a tangle of worries and insecurities where a person should be. I have no choice anyway.

>you have multiple options
>you have no idea which choice to make
>you make a decision
>it was the wrong one
>life is ruined

This 4/10 fat chick wants to have a relationship but i dont want one with her. We've hung out a couple times. She helps me cum and I'm not sure how to stop talking with her cause I feel like she is the only girl who will like me

>>36806884
Lol oh desperation at its finest.

>>36806980
I know its desperate but when I'm horny I cant help myself

I have the chance to actually get laid but I'm scared because my penis is small, what do?

>>36807166
Without paying for it? If you're a V do it or else you'll regret it

>>36806211
How so I stop being a bother to people?

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>>36807166
How "small" is it? Your insecurities may very well a bigger problem than the actual size of your dick. What's the girl like and how's your relationship with her?

But on the actual sex, if you go limp or cum too soon, don't get mad or be too much of a pussy about it, just give some bullshit excuse like it being nerves or like it's just weird being with someone as hot as her and just focus on her pleasure, touching, kissing, and cuddling her, and eat her out no matter what. You don't need a hard dick to pleasure a girl.

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i think that flac rips download slowly on purpose...

it's a conspiracy

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>>36806211
I kinda want to kill myself. Nothing bad is even happening. It's just literally all I think about.

>>36808848
>>36806260
Me too. I just want this to all be over.

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>>36806275
i looked and it wasn't in my mei folder but it was in my gif folder
>ring ring
>mochi mochi?

holy FUCK there are some cute gifs in this folder

>>36806211
every now and then i feel the pull of that existential dread. i kind of wish i could delude myself into believing in a religion or even some kind of normie 'life is about happiness' bullshit, but i just can't understand how people convince themselves of greater meaning in life.

>>36806759
>feelsbadman
you could try a psychiatrist or something to try to lessen that feel but that shit never worked for me. in the end i slipped back into the neet life. good luck man.

>>36808848
the only thing that keeps me going these days is the possibility of new 'interesting' world developments (i guess, i dont really know how to word it). i think when i decide the new stuff to do is outweighed by the boredom i will probably give up.

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>>36806211
Going on 7 months of NEET life, cant find a job for my life not even fucking mcdonalds will hire me. Cant take this shit anymore tbqh sitting in my room playing vidya and watching anime all day isnt as fun as it was when i was 18. Alcohol doeant help anymore either social isolation REALLY fucks with your mind.

>>36807055
keep fucking her until you have sufficient sexual experience and confidence to move up to a 5/10 slightly less fat chick

then a 6/10

so on and so forth
maybe you'll get to a 10/10 before you die

>>36809137
get out as soon as possible
start going on the streets and socializing with homeless people if you have nothing else

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>>36809117
>pyschiatrists

God damn do i fucking hate these assholes been to 4 in the past year. All of them say the same shit and cant even pretend to care.. After i get done pooring out my life story with all the shit i would never tell anyone. They give me an anti deppresant say i owe em 15$ and tell me to look into breathing excersies and neditation. Bunch of fucking hacks.

wanna get my life together, but i'm too scared of rejection that i settle for failure, instead of taking a chance and being let down again.

Just when I thought that I got rid of my social life IRL... things went awry.

>>36806211
that gif reminds me of my ex. not sad memories or anything though. just a reminder that he happened.

I'm getting divorced and I didn't get the scholarship I wanted, so I have pretty much nothing going well for me right now.
Yet somehow I still smile at myself

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>girl is my friend
>I'm pretty sure I'm genuinely in love with her
>she showed a lot of fucking affection to me in the past
>she likes me too but when asked made it clear she preferred platonic relationships
>have tried converting love into platonic love
>it feels like it works for a little bit but I keep relapsing into feelings
who here /wantstolovesomeonebutcant/

>>36806211
Just got done with my second year of uni. Dad always pushing me to do my best and be who I want to be, but every time he asks me if my major is still the one I'm interested in I don't have the heart to tell him that I have no idea what I want to do. And that I'm scared I'm making a bad decision by continuing to do something I'm unsure about.

>>36809304
in that case, maybe you could get a new psychiatrist and tell him/her that you just wanna vent.

tell them you don't want advice......just the opportunity to talk about shit.

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I just wanna fuck tight boi Pucci for the rest of my life and all the good ones only wanna be in relationships with white guys. Fuck me up my white negros, can't even be a degenerate.

>>36806211
I'm trying to go to sleep but my neighbors are playing loud bass music, as always.
God I hate uni.

>>36807306
4.5 hard
We're friends, she just wants to hook up, but I kinda have feelings for her.
I'm not worried about cumming early or going limp.
It's more like what if I end up not being able to pleasure her and then lose any chance of being with her.

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>>36809979
Sharpie? Anyway, like I already said, you don't need a (big) hard dick to please a woman. Like a lesbian friend once told me, "lick it before you stick it."

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>>36809979
Also, forgot to mention. Fucking have sex with her. It might not be ideal for you, but a girl you like wants to have sex with you. Sure, you might not get a relationship or whatever, but you get to bang a qt that you have feelings for. Believe me, I had the chances but didn't act on them, and I regret it as I jerk off like a loser. Just wear a condom, be safe, etc.

>Get invited out
>Ignore phone call & text
>Cry for the next hour

why am i like this?

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I am quietly freaking out. After asking all week the guy who I've started blowing is possibly available tonight. But because the human brain is a dumb animal I am dealing with a knot of anxiety. I know what I'm signing up for and yet because I left it too long the dread takes time to dissipate.

I know it will and yet still it lingers

Having sex with a drunken passed out girl is obviously rape. HOW DO YOU NOT REALIZE THAT!? Fucking retard

>>36810591
Are you a cure girl(male)? Either way, why are you freaking out? You both want his dick in your mouth. IDK what the problem here is.

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>trying to get my prerequistes for EMT
>Don't know if I'll pass my Anatomy and Physiology course
>Even though it's a study-at-home course
>and it takes 45 hours to complete
>and there's only one assignment to do and 5 tests
>and the school is giving me 6 months to complete it
>feel completely retard and clueless reading the first chapter
>meanwhile my family and relatives are doctors, surgeons, and nurses
>tfw they unintentionally mock me with saying shit like "you're smart enough to be a doctor anon" or "you're just trying to fine excuses to not do this"

>>36810498

Your conscious resents and hates people but your
nateral instincts want to be around them. I have the same problem too.

>>36810731
*natural
Fuck off it's kinda late.

>>36810691
>Cute is in the heart, not the caress of unkind time on flesh

and I'm freaking out because the anxiety I have judged others for has not completely left me. It sleeps, deep and dead until something comes poking. I'll be fine once I'm there and into it. Twice will make it regular and I should get over the nerves more readily

>>36806759
>only form of social interaction I have is with anonymous strangers on an anime imageboard since I can't even talk to my own family and I ghosted my only friend out of paranoia

Oh I know this feel

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>>36809597

>friends with a women
She's just using you for companionship and is unintentionally calling you ugly. Do you seriously want to be around this roastie when she gets married and has kids with another guy. cut the cunt out of your life she's dead weight.

>>36810710

MY BSI IS ON. IS MY SCENE SAFE?

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I have oneitis bad for a girl, and the more I get to know her the more I fall for her. She's incredibly cute and sweet and I can only imagine how she'd act if she was in love with me too. She seems to like me too, but only in a friendly way as she's in a committed relationship. I don't know if she'd actually date me, if she'd just end up rejecting me but I never even had the chance to find out and I'll probably spend years thinking of her and wondering if I could've had a life with her.

I'M lN LOVE!

>>36811049

>she's in a committed relationship
Jump ship now before you hurt yourself even more, it's not pretty.

>>36811074
WITH THE COCO

>>36809845
i'll suck yo dicc and give you my boy pussy if you can help me launch an unsuccesful meme rap career

>>36811094
Fuck you orginalmstvely

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>>36811016

I find it comforting and sad that there's an odd amount of EMS guys on /r9k/.

>t. EMR cuck

>>36811109
Not even that black man. I'll teach you how to make beats though

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>>36811111

>tfw kek powers his response to me
kek wills it

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>>36811078
>Jump ship now before you hurt yourself even more
I know, I've strung myself along with false hope long enough. In a month and a half I'll be leaving and I'll probably never see her again.
>tfw she tells me she won't forget me
I know I'll never be able to forget her.

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>>36811111
holy shit kek powered BTFO

>>36811138
i'm way too dumb for that shit

>got black out drunk at the pub last night
>A guy 1 year younger than me walked me back home with linked arms so I didn't fall
>Had a poo this morning and when I wiped there was a bit of blood

Overreacting a bit cause of the blood but I think I'll be fine, currently in McDonalds having a sausage and egg mcmuffin and a icey smoothy drink to recover from hangover

>>36811157
>I know, I've strung myself along with false hope long enough. In a month and a half I'll be leaving and I'll probably never see her again.
Just stop talking and seeing her now. I wish I did earlier when I was in the same situation.

>tfw she tells me she won't forget me
Women are liars and never mean this. She'll forget about your existence while she fucks some other dude evey night. Not trying to be edgy but it's better to accept reality sooner later.

>>36811181
I thought the same thing

Originia

>>36811196
>Had a poo this morning and when I wiped there was a bit of blood

Was it bright or dark red blood? was the blood on your shit too?

>>36811196
just means you shit a little hard anon. Hemmy's are more common in men then any of us would like to think. Just keep an eye on it and if you keep getting blood or things start to acrively hurt when you shit then go get yourself checked out and buy something for it. Worst-case you have to finger the boipucci a few times a day with a suppository but you'll clear up inside a week or two

>>36811215
how did you learn? i spent a couple months beating my head against the wall so to speak trying to make music a couple years ago and all i learned was that i'm literally too dumb for this life
i'm dumber than literal drug-addicted niggers

>>36811232
Only when I wiped and it was light normal blood like when you cut your finger, it was a tiny bit, like 1cm long and 2mm wide

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I fucking hate him and I want him to rot a slow and painful death.

I enjoyed the male harem while it lasted but regardless, it's so pathetic of him to been such a salty little bitch and wanted more from me.

>>36811267
It's just takes time. I tinkered around and watched how to videos. Self study is usually hard because there's no one to teach. Just mental repetition. Most basic DAW's are easing to use.

>>36811275
Sounds like nothing to worry about. It's probably hemroids and/or not enough fibre in your diet. Get those creams and eat more fibre senpai. If it gets worse or it's not going away then go to your doctor.

>>36811299
>Most basic DAW's are easing to use.
you have a genius level IQ compared to me already

>>36811214
>Just stop talking and seeing her now
I work with her so I'm not just going to up and leave immediately. I have a much better job lined up but training doesn't start for another month so I'll stick around here and collect a couple more paychecks before leaving. I've told myself all this shit about her from the beginning anyway, I just wasn't willing to truly accept it and I've paid the price. It can hardly get any worse now.

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>>36811314
>genius level IQ
>used easing instead of easy
I'm fucking retarded

>>36811347
still a couple standard deviations higher than me

i really dont know what the FUCK is wrong with me, i can't do fucking A N Y T H I N G for myself
you have no idea how much joy and validation i would feel if i could record just one track, i've been struggling my entire life to do literally anything and I just fucking can't, i'm incapable of learning

>>36811389
That's just you telling yourself you're incapable of learning. Anything can be done given the amount of time and dedication one puts into song making. You can do it anon

>>36811414
i've had 2 years of neet life to do it and i simply didn't
i fucking C A N ' T

>>36811425
What do you struggle with the most ? Break it down

>>36811446
learning literally anything
i don't understand shit, i dropped out of high school, i can't write an essay or even do basic math, i can't hold a minimum wage job, i just don't learn, shit goes in one ear and out the other
i'm so defeated, i don't even really leave my bed for anything except more drugs and alcohol
i don't get it, i wish i could just kill myself but i don't feel strongly suicidal for some reason
it's like i'm just a body with no mind
i'm a body with no mind that thinks he's a mind with no body

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>>36811498
I'll make music in your steed anon. Rest easy son

>>36811544
thanks anon i wish you the best and i know you can make it
people like you are like Gods to me

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i've done nothing but binge and purge and surf the interwebs endlessly for the last few years but the weight gain is making me go insane and im not allowed to go on the internet for more than a few hours a day anymore. im on a psych ward where im treated like shit, im never getting out and i can only see my family a few times a year. the only reason i havent killed myself yet is that i consider going to hell a possibility.