Hello /r9k/ I am a real life wizard who is willing to grant any

I wish I had a good paying job.

>>36802761
Granted! You will receive a call in a few years.

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I want an Xbox

gib cash plox

>>36802740
I wish I wish I had a fish.

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I want a 10 inch long dick with 6.5 inch girth

>>36802740
I wish for millions of dollars in savings and bonds ;^)

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>>36802740

I want millions of British pounds so i can buy loads of good shit.

>>36802778
Granted! You will be receiving an original 2001 Xbox.

>>36802805
What did I say about shortening words

>>36802809
Granted! Tyrone will be at your house shortly.

>>36802773
>few years
WHAT THE FUCK ANON
I WANT MY MONEY BACK

>>36802740
finish my continious dispair

I wish all big labia turn into poop that can't wash off. Roasty pussy is disgusting.

>>36802740
I want a hot and smart girl whom I can marry for infinity amounts of passing hours.
checkmate faggot

i wish i could just vanish without anybody knowing or caring

>>36802841
Granted! You will receive when you are retired.

>>36802845
You will be receiving a million pound cakes from Britain in a short time

i wish for a comfy job, not having to talk to humans too much and a good salary

I want cunt

>>36802740
I wish i was not a stupid person

>>36802891
>retires immediately because all retired means is you aren't going to work ever again
You're caveat is pointless and you should kill yourself of thinking you outsmarted the anon. Also wizards don't grant caveats with wishes, that's genies you imbecile.

I wish to go back to fifty months ago.

I want a cool hat now.

I wish my body was suddenly morphed into a body that looks similar to a body builder, and I wish I would grow to 6 foot 2 within 24 hours.

>>36802740
I wish I was world champion.

You don't really have to do anything, I'll make it happen regardless. The sonic totem has predicted I will be the GOAT.

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>>36802740

I wish for billions of dollars from Rothschilds bank accounts, oh mighty wizard

>>36802950
>no e's
>body builder
wew lad fucking brainlets

>>36802891
>when you are retired
I'll do that now, thank you. Where are my saving and bonds?

>>36802864
Granted! You will die a slow death through a span of 80 years

>>36802872
Uhhh granted? I guess

>>36802874
You're brand new AI girlfriend will be at your house in a few years

>>36802879
Granted! You will be on a secluded island in 200 years

>>36802894
Granted! Your new job will be calling you in a few months.

>>36802899
Granted! Expect a call from your sister or mom in a few hours.

I wish for vast funds of cash and a crab companion

>>36802989
Robots arent' girls. You suck at being a genie. Brainlets please stop thinking you're clever.

>>36802740
A gf which has an attraction to who I am.

>>36802967
>no e
>brainlets

Fucking brainlets

I wish for a cat

>>36802740
gib mi a big b3nis :DDD

>>36803008
>I wasn't making a wish
Fucking brainlets don't even understand context. wew lad

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>>36803019
you get middle cat

I want a handjob from MILF

>>36803031
>no e
>brainlet
>understand
>context
>wew

FUCKING BRAINLETS, AMIRITE LEBBIT XDDD

>>36803070
Please go back to your containment board >>>/trash/.

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>>36802740
I wish for five million dollars, in cash, this month, no tricks or twisting of my wish.

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>>36802740
I fancy a Fox 601 bassoon.

>>36803092
After you, m'gentilesire
>>>/r9k/

>>36802740
Luck, luck, so much luck.

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>>36802740
I wish that my dad is now living again.

>>36803130
I'm already on /r9k/ brainlet.

>>36802740
I wish for a caring, christian, kindly gf. Wouldn't mind if the gf is good looking.

I want that girl I fancy as my romantic companion on May 6th, 2017.

>>36802989
few months would be perfect timing, thank you wizard

>>36803188
>no e
>brainlet

Fucking brainless, amirite 9gag

>>36802740
I wish for that girl from my school to go to my room tonight and suck my cock and allow for doing cunnilingus.

>>36803124
>five
You had a go at it, thats what counts

>>36802740
I wish for youth and immortality

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>>36802740
I wish for an XNA XDK.

>>36803209
>>>/s4s/ is this way. You seem to have clicked the wrong link.

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>>36803222
I'm actually an idiot. Sorry wizard. I'll just go now.

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i want vaginas attached to girl

>>36803005
Granted! Maybe soon

>>36803019
Granted, two tickets to the "catz musical" coming at ya

>>36803059
Granted! Your mom will be there shortly

>>36803126
Granted!

>>36803148
Granted! Your new name is luck

>>36803198
Granted! You're AI gf bot is coming

>>36803124
Granted! Your monopoly cash is coming soon

>>36803226
Granted! You're going to regret this.

>>36803234
Granted?

>>36803254
I am not that wizard actually. Slim odds but your wish could pass without him noticing

>>36803311

This wizard is a jewish shill! Protecting the Rothschild how shameful. >>36802962

>>36803311
>>I want a handjob from MILF
>Granted! Your mom will be there shortly
MILF means mother/mom I'd like to fuck. I would not like to fuck my mom. Therefore my mom isn't a MILF. Try harder faggot.

I want ten million kilograms of gold bullion in half-kilo ingots at my door tomorrow morning.

>>36802740
I want blacks to go back to Africa

I want to turn into a 10/10 girl in a 2d world.

>>36803405
>ten
At least you tried

>>36802740
immortality thank

>>36802937
>>36802938
>>36802957
Dont skip us wizard
>>36802740

>>36802740
I want big chunks of gold in my moms husbands back yard right now dammit.

>>36803485
You all are granted your wishes since I skipped over you, my apologies!

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>>36803311


>he thinks having hj from mumsie is turning this wish into shit for me

hmmmm

>>36802740
I want a lot of cash

>>36802740
I want to spurt massive wads of cum.

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I want a person who i consider attractive and is of the female gender that is exactly the way I invision a partner to be my qtp2t gf and live happily ever after

>>36803603
XDDD WISH GRANTED MY SUPREME GENTLEMEN XDDDD :^) YOU WILL SQUIRT LOADS OF CUM INTO YOUR MOUTH AND BUTTHOLE XDDDDDD HAHAHAHAH

>>36803603

Granted. Every 10 minutes your teeth spurt 30ml of cum in your mouth.

>>36802740
I wish I wasn't such a dissapointment

>>36803658
>>36803673
Wow. This just proves OP is from Reddit. Why not just make this thread there? People would probably find it much funnier and give you compliments on your supreme intelligence and wit.

>>36802740
i want a gf

:^) no "e" in that bud

>>36802740

>fifty cumshots in ops mouth

>>36803730
>>Also you can't shorten words
>gf-short for girlfriend
WEW
E
W

I want a woman who is navigating around Sol to turn 19 to stay in a courtship with I.

>>36803758
XDDD MY FEDORA TIPPING BROTHER WISH GRANTED AHAHAHAHAH XDDD :^^^^^^^^) FIFTY CUMSHOTS WILL BE SHOT IN MY MOUTH AFTER I AM DEAD XDDDDDD HAHAHAHA :^^^^^^^^^)))))))))

>>36802740
I want a Playstation 4

suck my fat fucking dick you ass-munching son of a bitch

>>36803804
XDDDDDD HAHAHAHAH GOOD WISH FRIENDO :^^^^^^^^^) IT IS GRANTED!!!! YOU WILL RECEIVE A BROKEN AND UNFIXABLE PLAYSTATION 4 SOON HAHAHAHAH XDDDDD CAN'T OUTSMART THE WIZARD XDDDD :^) :^^^^^^^))))) :^^^^)))^^^)))^^^))):^^^)))

>>36803728

You used an email. Your punishment is a portal connects your mouth with cumbreath. I hope you swallow, otherwise it will be awkward spitting out nearly a cup of cum every hour.

>>36803760

Gf stands for gal-pal.

>>36803831
>email
>autocorrect
>IMG_0448
How much more reddit can you get?

I want a light skin passing trap gf! I want boipucci.

>>36802740
I wish I was immortal, but I can will it to stop.

>>36803871
HAHAHAH XDDDDD WISH GRANTED KIND SIR1!!!11!! YOU HAVE TRULY OUTSMARTED ME THE WIZARD XDDDDD ::::::^^^))^))^)))^"^^)^))^:::^))^)))))^^^^::::^^^^)) I CAN THINK OF NO CAVEATS FOR THAT WISH HAHAHAHAH XDDDDD SO I GRANT YOU ANOTHER WISH AS WELL XDDDD ::^^^^^))))^^^))^)::^^^))^):^))^)))))^^^^^^:::^^^)))^)

>>36802740
I want to obtain millions of dollars

I want my fantasy gf

I want a nigga

>>36803910
Also youth, and you, Wizard.

>>36802740
A fujoshi gf

>>36803728
That wasn't OP you fucking idiot

>>36802740

i wish for two million dollars, USD cash.

>>36802740
I wish for 100 1 kilogram bars of gold along with valid accompanying forms proving my lawful owning of said gold to show up in vacant grassland across from my building in which I occupy causing no harm to any living thing nor said gold or said forms within this hour of this day of this solar orbit.

>>36803978
>not understanding the point of the post was showing how similar the mocking ironic response was to OP's actual response
Brainlets please.

I wish for a girl with a hair color of a primary color. Primary colors I will not want are color of sky and color of piss. This woman should enjoy my body and mind.

>>36804001
>enjoy
Nice "e" there as a part of your wish nigger.

>>36803992
>this just proves OP is from Reddit

And I'm the brainlet

I want sixty trillion dollars

AI robot mommy wife

>>36804021
>mocking ironic response is modeled off of cringy reddit tier humour
>OP posts a similar response
>OP isn't from reddit
Yes you are a brainlet. And part of being a brainlet is the inability to recognize you are a brainlet. All brainlets think they are smart for some reason.

I wish that I could fuck a girl at any location I want

A good paying job pls

>>36802740
I want to astral project

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>>36803160
op i want it

>>36802740
I want a tranny fucktoy.

I wish for all robots to attain chadhood.

>>36802740
I wish for a fit girl who will commonly wank or suck my dick until I cum.

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>>36804154
BASED ANON

I FEEL IT

MY MUSCLE MASS IS INCREASING

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

I want to fuck you hard in the ass all night tonight with my big fat dick. I want you to suck my dick too.

>>36804245
g-granted~

>>36802740
I wish for six trillion dollars

>>36804331
Granted, the USD will now exponentially hyperinflate

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>>36802740
I want a loving husband that wants a lot of kids and to go to stay in rural lands~

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I want to climb out of plat up to high-diamond.

>>36804207
THEY CANT CATCH ME! THEY'LL NEVER FIND OUT!

>>36802740
>Can't shorten words
>The
>Th

I dunno anon can I type it in a different language other than english? Maybe that way my wish can come true

>>36802740
i want 100000 US on my bank account

>>36804207
>>36804139
Stop deleting my posts that mock OP for being a redditor.

>>36802740
I wish I was happy
wizard pls no bamboozle :(

I wish you would stop living, right now.

>>36802740
I wish that you post a photograph of your dick with a hat on it.

>>36802740
I wish for satan to say hi, hug my body and put my body into our void for now and always, i want no harm

I wish for a pound of marijuana, tonight, and no djinn tricks such as dropping it on my skull from high up

I want to win six formula 1 championships

I wish to stop living, and for dubs.

>>36802740
I wish for Asian girls to suck my cock

>>36805822
well that went swell

i wish for happy mind

I wish for a busty black girl with lactating boobs.

I want grammar to be making of good.

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
give me ecstay
reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

i wish for a grill

>>36802740
I wish for untold myriads of philosophical, physical, and spiritual instant gratification.