TURNS OUT I'VE BEEN MASTURBATING THE WRONG WAY MY WHOLE LIFE

oh boy what outrageous and totally /real/ story does OP have to share with us this evening?

>>36782995
I'VE BEEN USING THREE FINGERS INSTEAD OF THE WHOLE HAND THINGY
MY PENIS IS FUCKING BENT

>>36783158
Kek, it'll bend anyways.

>>36783158
That's natural you fucking idiot.

>>36782967
Sometimes i treat myself to a two finger mate, it's all good

>>36783158
What? I thought three fingers was the normal way

Same here
i masturbated by tucking my penis between my thighs and pushing on it up until i was 18

>>36782967
not op, but i used to form a claw like the vending machines that grap teddy bears and pull away from my dick

>>36782967
I have been working on perfecting the art of masturbation. I have had powerful orgasms after some training, and funnily enough I have been masturbating less because I feel more satisfied.
>No porn
>In bed
>Get hard
>Jack off slowly
>Add spit/lube if necessary (I'm uncut but sometimes I get dry)
>With the other hand alternate between playing with my nipples, massaging my balls, and massaging the area between my balls and my anus
>Edge for a while
>Go faster
>Cum explosively

naw mate, the wrong way is humping. ruins your sensitivity.

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>not using a Sawzall with a fleshlight attached
>2017

you're sticking things in your butt now?

I just never got a good sensation of using my whole hand when I discovered masturbation so I resorted to 3 fingers

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> no fap
> don't really know how
> too scared to learn
> get really depressed due to nofap
> end up ejaculating later that night or next morning
> shamefully rinse off clothes and dick
> repeat

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i apply pressure on my seat with my bent left foot.

i dont know if this is the "right" way, but it injured me.

>>36784212
That pic is fucking comedy gold.

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>>36783457
This is my preferred method too.

Unfortunately I recently got into the habit of fapping exclusively to Korean porn. Been beating my dick senseless for about six days in a row now.

Can't wait to get off this ride and go back to jerking off to my imagination again.

> not dry humping your dick (limp) against a pillow til you come
>not orgasming with limp cock
>not having dick lips swollen afterward
>not having sore cock after masturbating
>not realizing how unhealthy that that is thanks to a Louis cuck skit
> not doing two weeks no cap then trying to jack off normally and realizing you can't
>not realizing you get fewer and fewer boners
>not realizing you probably can't have sex normally now
> not trying to change your ways and failing every time and hating yourself for ruining your sexuality

Fucking plebs.

>Place flat hand on balls and flail dick wildly with this hand
>Make a flat surface with other hand and let head of dick repeatedly mash against underside of hand

I've been masturbating like this since I was a kid. Tried the normal way, but it's not as much fun and takes way too long to get off.

>>36784941
>>36784995

Guess what? You two idiots broke your dicks and even if you both woke up as ultra-chads you wouldn't be able to lose your virginity. Let that sink in

>>36785242
Pretty much lol. I'm still gonna try and If I can't stick it in I'm just gonna kill myself.

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>>36783473
>did this just one too many times
>right side of glans is now insensitive, on top of already less sensitive due to being circumcised
At least onaholes still feel pretty good.

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I jerk off with my hand like this, focusing mostly on the head and I bust in under 30 seconds.

>>36783158
That is the normal way you spaz.
But my new fave shit since I actually managed to get my fucking foreskin loose is lubing my finger up and swizzling it around in there.

Then actually tugging it down and rubbing frenulum. Burns but it burns good.

>>36784177
Haha faggot you fell for nofap meme.

>>36785242
Not necessarily true, in some cases it's possible to stop masturbating prone, but it's really difficult.

>>36785883
I used to jerk off like that when I was about 13 and didn't know what I was doing. It gives me chafing and blisters though, so I don't do it anymore.

>>36786138

I knew I was doing it wrong but still did it. 26 years old and still fapping like a mong.

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>all the people with tiny penises in this thread
kek

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>>36786781
hey that actually made me lol

>>36783158
I used fingers as well until I started to feel discomfort so now I use my grip.