>be neet >living at moms place >she knows I have schizophrenia

>>36673523
Tell her that they're in your room and to stay out of it. Dump one on her head if she is still continuing on her tyrade. Rape is the last resort.

Climb out the window and run away

Where are your piss jugs?

>>36673590
She's morbidly obese so I really don't want to rape her but I'll do it if I have to

>>36673523
Wtf you shouldn't have to do anything you live their that whore shouldn't be allowed to kick you out if my mum did this u would say
"Hey i live here so you should stop you bloody woman"

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>>36673613
It's a pretty long fall desu

>>36673634
She took them all but I have one left

That looks like a fairly newly constructed house, why are there loose floorboards?

>>36673812
Step out, cling to the edge, and slowly lower yourself down while facing the wall. Then run

>>36674293
I pried it up to hide piss juggs when my stupid roastie mom went to Starbucks with the neighbor ladies

>>36673812
It's your only hope, make a break for it

>>36674331
Where do I go once I run? I don't have any friends or other living family members. I don't have any money either

>>36674368
Not the same guy, but just try to enjoy your life as a drifter

>>36674368
Either that or just let your mother take the jugs

>>36674387
How will I acquire food and water? Where will I get piss juggs to piss and shit in? Where wo I sleep at night and how will I browse 4chan and watch anime?

>>36674407
Dammit, I can't do either of those. Do you have any other ideas?

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>>36673523
Is that a trophy on your dresser?
What did you get a trophy for?

>>36674447
Drink it and give her the empty jug

>>36674452
I used to be in cub scouts and won some stupid trophy for a racing game. I hated Cub Scouts but my dad wanted me to get out of the house because as a kid I didn't do anything and had no friends so I just played vidya all day

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>>36674504
Well the awkward part is I actually have my own bathroom connected to my room. I only have piss juggs because I don't feel like leaving my bed

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>>36674544
>some stupid trophy
>still keep it on your dresser years later
Perhaps there's more to this story

>>36674649
I just never bothered to throw it out. I put it up there and forgot about it

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>>36674616
>has own bathroom
>still uses piss juggs

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>>36674616
that's the craziest thing I've ever read

>>36673812
Make a rope to climb down with your bedsheets.

>>36674746
>>36674798
Normalcucks, pls leave posthaste

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OP is taking the piss you retards

>>36674874

No he is leaving the piss, stupid char poster

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>>36674616
How lazy can you be?

>>36674616
I am in a similar situation but whenever I need to poop I hold it in for hours and sometimes even days because I dont want to leave my computer. So I poop my pants every once in a while

>>36674824
better yet throw your bed out and gently fall on it

>>36674826
>he doesn't have blood bottles

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>>36675024

>gently fall on it

This can only end well

>>36673523
Real shitty bait bro, but if I had a child that acted like, I would honestly just drop him off in a field somewhere a couple states over and be done with it

>>36675096
>bro
maybe you deserve a child like that

>>36674428
Make a rope out of curtains and tie 2 curtains instead of one in case one comes undone and you'll have to just panhandle and busk until you find odd jobs. Some people pay for stupid shit like driving their car cross country.

>>36675128
nah bruh, that aint me

>>36673523
Anon, better try to talk to her, but it is usually meaningless. If it actually will be meaningless, just wait. Do you have a place to run?

theres no shame in using piss jugs OP
they are just the modern day chamber pot

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chamber_pot


explain the basic concept to yer mom and it should all be fine.


yer welcome dude

>>36675013
oh chris chan *audience starts laughing*

>>36674798
It's not crazy it's smart
>>36674824
It would probably break
>>36674901
If I run I'll take it with me
>>36675013
I know that feel
>>36675024
Yeah I'll probably just throw the mattress out the window
>>36675214
>>36675251
I'll try to tell her that
>>36675154
Both will break

>>36675588
remeber to gently fall on the mattress that's a very important part

>>36675639
How do I originally do that?

>>36675719

Throw your mattres out the window and land ass first on it. Your butt cheeks will cushion your fall like air bags

>>36674616
>has en-suite bathroom
>too lazy to leave bed to piss in toilet
>apparently not too lazy to leave his room and hide piss jugs underneath the floorboards
Totally believable...

>>36675719
save your second jump for when you're about to hit the ground

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>>36674616
Holy fuck,you lazy bastard!

u lazy sunna bitch

>>36675588
timestamp of piss jug for proof or GTFO

OP, you said she's morbidly obese right? Since the window isn't an option maybe just try bolting for the front door when you think she's not expecting it?

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>>36675251
Wikipedians have the craziest fetishes.

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>>36674616
This has to be the second funniest thing I've read all week, first being braphog.

>>36675775
>leave room every Monday to collect food, water bottles, and Pepsi from the kitchen
>on the way out lift up floorboard to put last weeks worth of pissjuggs in the floorboard
>>36677834
That could work

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>>36673523
>has ultimate NEET setup
>still uses piss jugs