Hey anon, what are the very very very very smaaall things in

3 things that I can still enjoy; Weed, Audiobooks and long lonely walks.

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pizza, music, seeing people post cute anime girls

>>36558810
Nice, anon. What audiobooks?

>>36558856
Tell me your favorite pizza topping. Mine is baked ziti!

>>36558625
sleeping, eating, it's the few things i can control anymore. I also think a career would give me purpose and enjoyment

>>36558936
I like taking powernaps here and there. Nap too much and you end up screwing up your sleep schedule around the clock.

>>36558922
ham, i've tried baked ziti before and it's pretty good

>>36559040
My brother loves ham!
I also love chicken penne alla vodka pizza. NY has this place called Marios' and they've got (Almost) literally everything.

>>36558625
my family, friends, life, everyone, love, myself, career, dreams, small things, air, flowers, having all my 5 senses, eveyrthing.

>>36558625
I like to draw too man. well at least i used to.

shit - tier drawings only but it has helped me get through tough times.

I like to sleep as well... I actually look forward to going to bed every day, even though it takes me hours to fall asleep most nights.

I made a challenge for myself to run a half marathon, so I work on that. It's helping me relate to normies a little more and it seems to impress people when I tell them.

I'm ok at woodworking and building things. Nothing complex, just tables and bed frames.

I have two cats that I really love. I look forward to getting home to seeing them all day at work.

That's about it. I still want to kill myself though. Life doesn't have inherent meaning and the meaning you ascribe to it is baseless and arbitrary.

>>36558625
It sounds really stupid and underage I know but kpop. Most of it is ultra cutesy and not to my taste, but occasionally I'll just find a song that sets me on fire and makes life worth living.

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>>36559119
I like drawing robots and my favorite characters. I tried my best at porn but unfortunately I can't bear to do it. I'm embarrassed and I'm completely sad that I can't even completely enjoy my own hobby that I work hard at every day. I'm slowly losing my interest.

>>36559113
That's great, anon!

>>36559124
Keep going for your cats, anon. I love pets but I'm so irresponsible. My bunny named Chester ran away.

>>36559165
Nice!
I don't have strong tastes in music. I love listening to lots of experimental stuff, like GYBE. Occasionally, I like the soppy indie rock stuff.

Listening to a good song.

Standing by the water and feeling the breeze coming off it, just staring at it.

Seeing sports teams I hate lose.

Seeing politicians I hate get publicly embarrassed.

Getting a package in the mail that I've been waiting for.

Many more things. The most important one is that you're going to fucking die anyway. I used to want to kill myself. Why spoil the surprise though? Will you live to die of old age? Will something come around and take you out so swiftly and suddenly you didn't even know it? Will you die suffering in agony as you would as you jumped off a bridge? Or will some nutjob who visits this site kill you thinking he's killing normies to start the beta uprising? You don't know. Wouldn't you like to know how this story ends? I wish you luck anon. I don't know your circumstances but I hope you find a reason to want to continue. I hope whatever is making you feel this way comes to pass. We could probably use one more person like you here on this planet and one less person who would never ever even think about killing themselves. Seems all the shitty people are happy to stick around and make us miserable. I hope you won't tip the scale.

>>36559243
Ever heard Massive Attack?

Whenever I'm feeling experimental the album Mezzanine is usually my goto, in particular a song called Risingson.

>>36559271
I'm very afraid of people. I was bullied at a young age and I moved frequently. I don't like being afraid, I want to know whats out there!

I have such a strong need to make friends but I don't have and won't have any ability to! My dad pokes fun at my insecurities even though we're the exact same person, and people in public keep telling us that we look and act alike! I'm so dreadful. I fantasize about killing myself everyday for hours on end because it became an instinctual habit and now I can't stop. I can't stop, anon! I want to die now!

Thanks for your consideration though! I know theres lots of nasty people in the world.

>>36559310
I love massive attack! The album with the beetle on the cover art is my favorite! I can't remember the name right now.

>>36559422
That's the one I'm talking about, Mezzanine. Nice to see another fan of it, what's your favorite song off the album?

>>36558625
Did you draw that?
I'm going to save it so I always remember you and your thread. Good luck.

>>36559271
This is a really good post.thanks, anon.

>>36559457
Oh my goodness, intertia creeps is my favorite. All-time.

>>36559472
Thank you!

>>36559189
dat digital stuff bro? neat stuff!

this might cheer you up:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IV6tZEj4yY0

also, i heard Furry porn makes a ton of money.

>>36559502
I love inertia creeps too, the production is mind boggling. Some people are just so talented.

Like you, anon. Keep doing your art, you're amazing at it. I would buy your work someday desu.

>>36559422
I'm afraid of people too. My dad beat me when I was younger then I would go to school every day to get picked on and treated like shit. What's fucked up is I made it to this age, 28, I managed not to kill myself. I managed to learn that there's nothing to fear from most people. That in the adult world somehow everyone is really nice to me and treats me great but I am still afraid of normal social contact. I have taken jobs that forced me to do it simply for the fact that I find comfort to be terribly boring. I am working as a cashier at a supermarket now. After my first few days I came home one night and I just started fucking crying. It wasn't entirely because I was sad, it was half happy. I was happy because I saw the good in almost every person I dealt with every day. They treated me with kindness and respect. Sometimes they could tell I was new at it and gave me encouragement. But the sad part is that I can never be normal like them. No matter how fucking hard I try or how good I get at facing my fears I'll always be damaged.

I am kinda happy I don't have friends. I have only a few people I care about in my life that I have any obligation to. Also my job which counts as an obligation too. Other than that I am free. I used to feel like shit and hate myself because I was always alone. But now it makes me feel free. I realized that's all I wanted from the start. To be fucking left alone. Not to be constantly criticized for things I can't change. Not to be mercilessly harassed all day then come home to be abused some more.

If you ever want to get where I am you probably need to cut your dad out of your life. I am on good terms with mine now. He quit drinking but he's still a fucking asshole. I keep him at a distance. I hope you will figure it out.

>>36559702
>>36559665
You guys make my heart feel warmer... thank you, really.

>>36559760
I understand. I see now.

I don't know too well yet because I'm still a very emotional youngun but I did give myself a quota to reach in the near future so I don't hurt myself today, at least! I think I'm happy I committed to that!

Thank you, very much. I don't know what else to say but thank you all for giving me your time.

>>36558625
Manga, books, plants, my bike.

>>36559901
Whats your favorite manga you've read, anon? I was neglect-ant of books during my youth and I dread it, because there's lots of interesting literature that I can't understand. I never listened to the smarter guys.

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>>36559760
Working as cashier had the opposite effect on me. Given that it was Walmart in a trashy area, there always a minimum of one person to treat me like shit every day until it finally broke me at some point and I just started bawling in front of all the customers and my coworkers.

>>36558625
is that frisk? subtle.

>>36559865
Believe me when I say it's a pleasure, anon. I wish I could do this for every single person.

>>36559987
I only had one lady that was a total bitch to me. It fucked me up emotionally pretty bad but I kept working anyway and tried to coast off the niceness of the next few customers. Didn't quite work, all that bottled up emotion made it hard to work. I talked to my team leader about it and she told me next time I can just call and have someone come take over my register. I have only ever had to do that before because of injuries.

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>>36558810
Audiobooks are great.
>>36558856
The community is nice.
>>36558936
A personal hobby is fine too.
>>36559113
Flowers, yes!
>>36559124
>baseless and arbitrary.
Not if you enjoy them!
>>36559189
I like your robot a lot!
>>36559271
Standing by the water and feeling the breeze coming off it, just staring at it.
Heck yeah.
>>36559502
You did draw that? Good for you.

>>36558625
Alcohol
Pussy
Music
Movies
Driving fast
Books
Getting my dick sucked
cheeseburgers
burritos
new shoes

>>36559941
Yokohama Kaidashi Kiko
Yotsubato
Mushishi
Bloody Monday
One Punch Man
Berserk
Ajin

Start reading now! Go to your local library, get a library card and start reading. Just read anything. Look for anything, find the first thing that you feel you MUST read and grab it.

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>>36560069
>>36560069
I envy you on a level you can't comprehend.

>>36560151
I love OPM and Berserk! I also read Ajin to its latest update about a year ago, I think. It's a really dark story but its so cool.

>>36560098
Thanks! It's like an abstract kinda robot, and I wanted to make it look like an angel.

>>36560118
Don't drive too fast, anon.

>>36558625
The sound of my dog eating potato chips. She makes them sound so damn delicious and crunchy, like she's trying to sell them to me. It never fails to make me smile.

Driving around at 3 AM just makes me feel all the more better

If it wasn't for weed, my little brother, and the UFC, I'd probably be dead.

>>36560167
Yeah I guess I chose the right place to work in exactly the right area. The bitchy lady got mad because I put her hair dye in with her food. I had just come back off my break and I wasn't thinking straight. She started telling me how she worked as a cashier for 30 years and trained people and blah blah blah. I was trying to be nice to her but she kept finding fault with everything I did after that.

I remember just thinking I hope she goes to Walmart next time and gets the kind of service she deserves. I guess our Walmart isn't that horrible but everyone working there looks like life has kicked their ass repeatedly. At my work about 10% of the people look like that and everyone else is abnormally cheery. Makes me feel a little bit inadequate sometimes when I get a register next to someone who has done it for so many years and they're amazing at engaging the customer.

>>36560215
My bunny, Chester, loved eating cabbage and leftover redleaf lettuce. He chewed it like it was the first thing he ever ate, each time he ate it. I loved him. I hope your dog stays healthy, anon.

>>36560239
I used to take walks at night when it snowed. It was so peaceful, and no one would be outside to hurt or rob me! I could even breathe with my nose when it happened.

>>36560256
Marijuana sure is emotionally lifting here, isn't it?

>>36560317
I don't know what I'd do without marijuana. It's a miracle plant, I swear. It somehow can simultaneously let me be content with how little I do while also being a tool for creativity when I work on my papers and personal writing. It's like a PED for life.

>>36558625
I like when the rain is over and the sky is clear. Everything feels so fresh and alive.

Or when there's a drizzle that lasts all day but never gets very strong and everything is calmed. Maximum comfy.

>>36560454
I love the rain in general, anon! I just hate the bugs that keep coming back after its dry... I'd like to move to a place where it snows all day, forever and ever...

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>>36558625
Cute girls. One in particular honestly.
Finding a new song that I like, or listening to one of my favorites.
Rainy days.
Falling asleep when I'm genuinely tired
Those perfect nights when you can hear the wind outside, and the rain on the roof, and a few cars in the road
Anime and video games.
my absolutely wonderful friends
Comfy internet browsing.
Laughter in general.
Hearing the words "I love you" from just the person you wanted to hear it from.

When I think about it, quite a few things honestly. Thanks for this thread, anon.

My guitar tbqhwyf

>>36561144
>my absolutely wonderful friends

FUCKING NORMIE REEEEEEE!!!!!!

I live a routine life, I work from 10 to 7, then I go home and do nothing. Barely a few friends that never invite me to anything. I am 27, alone while not at work, far from home. When I get home this sadness just covers me and I sometimes cry myself to sleep, it helps a little.

However when I wake up at 6, I go for a run and then take a shower and watch the sun rise, I feel good, completely opposite to how I felt before I slept, I smoke a cigarette or a joint sometimes and I feel complete. Sometimes I ruin it when I wish I could share this moment with someone. I also love the fresh feeling of shaving every morning, feels like purity.

>>36558625
Dang, OP, is that your art? Do you live in the Bay Area? I'd be your friend.

My answers: that period of time when the day is breaking and the sun is rising, finishing all the video games I've wanted to play, those moments when I feel loved for being me (not for my accomplishments)

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Hey OP I'm trying to be an artist too. I work a full time night job so I never seem to have the energy or time to create anymore. It makes me want to die, honestly.

>>36558810
>>36558922
>>36560098
>audiobooks

y'all just blow in from Pleb Town?

Comedy.
Watching it, reading it, writing it, even watching other people talk about how they do it.
I just like stuff that makes people laugh and I want to make people laugh as well.

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>wearing girls clothes
>being referred to as she instead of he
>dark souls

This is what a shit human being looks like if you were ever curious

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>>36561956
For what it's worth anon, there are people in this world who know that how you feel about your own identity isn't necessarily tied to a part of your biology you had no choice over. If you feel like a girl, even if you don't always pass, you are a girl. You know yourself better than anyone else, so you have final say over that. Keep your spirits up, okay? I'm sure you're hella cute

>>36562050
I appreciate the kind words anon, you seem nice.

>If you feel like a girl, even if you don't always pass, you are a girl.
I just can't believe this honestly. I have the burning need to be a female while knowing that I'll never really be one and I can't reconcile it. When people treat me like a girl I feel the guilt and shame of being a tranny, I feel like a deception, a fake girl. When people treat me like a boy I want to fucking die because I want to be a girl more than anything and being acknowledged as a guy is the worst pain.

>>36562095
To tell you the truth, I'm a super butch dyke myself. So I get identity problems to a degree. But here's what I know for sure: being a girl isn't about being seen a certain way by other people. People are fuckers because they're tired and worried about the rent and stuff happening in the middle east. If they do something that hurts you they don't even care because they don't think about you. That's why you don't have to give a damn about their opinions. If you look at yourself in the mirror, and look deep into the dark shiny parts of your eyes and see a woman there, it doesn't matter if you're a construction worker with a full beard. You are truly a woman. I hope things work out for you, it's rough out there for sure.

>>36562229
I feel like you've spoken to me on /r9k/ before, and that we probably had this exact conversation

>>36562264
I'm not sure how much of a coincidence that would be. I have a habit of coming here all the time to try and connect with people for a second. I wonder how many dykes actually browse this board, maybe there's secretly a ton. It just really triggers me when I see trans individuals feeling down on themselves because I had a childhood friend who killed herself because her family wasn't accepting. Bad times.

>>36562320
I just remember someone mentioning themselves as a butch dyke and referencing how people are upset about the things in their life (like rent being too high for example) in the same post, and that post being in response to me complaining about not being a real girl so I'm almost positive that's you.

>It just really triggers me when I see trans individuals feeling down on themselves because I had a childhood friend who killed herself because her family wasn't accepting
Even trans people who have perfectly supportive families and transition early and pass still kill themselves far more often than normal people do. Being trans is miserable

>>36562369
Well damn. I barely remember saying something like this before, honestly I'm hardly ever sober when I post here. I'm sorry to hear you're miserable. Even though I apparently said this all before, I really do mean it. I just want people to be strong and fight for their identities. And myself, too. I want to be strong so I can stand up for myself.

>>36562369
Sorry if this whole situation just weirded you out, I'm probably a real acoustic

>>36562449
No it didn't weird me out, I think you're nice and I wish I had a friend like you. I just feel bad for derailing this thread so much

>>36562461
Haha me too, OP's art is really legit. It looks digital but it's almost hard to tell because the paint effect is so well done. I hope everyone in this thread finds what they're looking for. Life seems like it's extra unfair on the people who find themselves here.