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Who else here is not actively suicidal but considers suicide to be on the table? I.e. it's not a taboo for them like it is for most?
I'm not currently in circumstances that would lead to it, but the thought that I could, and would do it if I felt it necessary is always in the back of my mind.
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I'm doing the long game suicide by having a terrible diet and living a sedentary lifestyle. If being alive becomes too unbearable I have no qualms with leaping off a bridge.
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>>36509046
Passive suicidal ideation is still a worrying thing.
Think about killing myself everyday. Almost went through with it last october. Drunk, rifle at my throat. Couldnt do it at that point.
But ill get there eventually.
I feel like i deserve to die and my life is shit and worthless anyway. Its a comfort to know i have an emergency stop but it also feels like the more just option than just living on.
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It's an impulse that sometimes get too hard to fight for me, i get this overwhelming urge to kill myself and i usually hurt myself or have some kind of hyperventilating screaming to myself mental breakdown. I figure it's better to kill myself than live like this although i know its what some people want and i dont want to feed into their bullshit and i dont want to make my mom cry she'll probably kill herself too
im over it though its no big deal
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>>36509099
I worry about my health with regards to my appearance somewhat because I want the option of engaging with society, but similarly, I have no problem with dangerous activities that could kill me in a split-second, motorcycling, racing cars, flying small planes. I do all of those and I'm actually less anxious when doing so than in day-to-day life.
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>>36509154
>It's an impulse that sometimes get too hard to fight for me, i get this overwhelming urge to kill myself and i usually hurt myself or have some kind of hyperventilating screaming to myself mental breakdown. I figure it's better to kill myself than live like this although i know its what some people want and i dont want to feed into their bullshit and i dont want to make my mom cry she'll probably kill herself too
Do you have underlying depression or do the episodes come out of nowhere?
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