>cleaning up with Kleenex after masturbating Holy shit. Holy

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l just cum on the wall

>>36436099
My guess would be that this is not a common conversation topic with the people you know.
But it's true, Kleenex (tm) are the way to go, cum deserves a proper cleaning apparatus.

>>36436154
Oh my god, is this real?. I can't believe how much my sides hurt.

I blow my load into my boxers and let it dry.

>>36436188
I used to do this, but my dick got some kind of infection so I started to cum on my sink.

>>36436187
Yes it is. Its just semen, not piss or shit, so I just spunk all over the place no big deal.

>>36436099
Socks are actually comfy af.

>>36436188
I blow it on my tummy and rub it in like it's lotion.

>>36436188
Same. People like you and me never had a chance.

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>>36436099
>masturbating
>Not letting wet dreams taking care of sexual desire

>>36436188
I do this too but I make sure to wear pajamas while I do so. Acts as a barrier.

>>36436270
>tfw no wet dreams since teen years
I rarely even get sex dreams at all...

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>>36436154
>>36436200
But...why a wall? You have to get out of bed and crouch for that...

>>36436270
>>36436304
You can force lucid dreams with practice, though. You just semi-wake up in the middle of a dream. Stop and realize where you are. They you can do whatever you want.

Warning: You can't get any REM sleep in a lucid dream, so don't do it often. Also, you begin to question reality sometimes.

>>36436154
Truly disgusting. Good game, anon.

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>>36436154
You don't have people over often, do you?

>>36436198
Same here. My prostate is fucked after all these years so I have to take care of myself now.

>>36436360
Do normies actually invite each other over to see where they sleep and masturbate?

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>>36436304
I get them about every other week. Not exposing myself to porn and working with a few females is probly why I get them.
>>36436334
Never actually tried to have lucid dreams, but I do enjoy the feeling of being tired and semi awake. I always get the most vivid dreams this way.

>>36436390
>My prostate is fucked
how. Doctor told me masturbation doesn't cause prostatitis, nor does it prevent prostate cancer either

>not just taking a shower after you fap

>>36436437
you seriously expect me to take 9 showers a day?

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>mfw keep on asking my mommy to buy me tissue boxes even though I know she knows I use them to cum into since my bin is full of cum soaked tissues and you can smell it from outside my room

>>36436437
not just fapping in the shower like a boss

>>36436437
>not enjoying the rancid smell of cum drying under the foreskin in the morning

>>36436532
Don't taunt me pls

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>>36436532
>foreskin
I will never know this feel

>that was not an original comment

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>>36436506
>parents emptied my nasty cum rag trash a few times then stopped
>now the Mexican maids do it

>>36436528
I wish I could do that but since I live with mother and my sister showers in the same shower as I do if I fapped in the shower and didn't eat it the cum would accumulate in all of my sisters hair stuck in the drain and when she or my mother goes to clean it out they'll see that there is cum on my sisters hair and they'll know that somebody cummed in the shower.
I don't want my sister to know I fap in that shower.

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>>36436154
Wath da...

Literally even as a borderline wizard, that is fucking revolting. Kys.

I mean, damn.

>>36436200

It's biomass, that's shit is gonna
be a nasty ass petri dish. AND THIS GUY GOT DUBS.

>>36436250
>>36436277
>>36436198
>>36436161

Just put me in the fucking screen cap. Autists.

>>36436528
It takes too long. I have a really small hot water tank.

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>>36436532
>tfw after giving my foreskin a good sniff
I love the smell of my own cum, both fresh and dried and I love rubbing my fingers on my foreskin and smell it multiple times a day.
idk why but it just smells so good and turns me on more than anything else i know of.

>>36436552
>>36436556
I still miss the feeling of cleaning up years of accumulated smegma in my teens years

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>>36436596
just stick your dick in a jar of Elmer's glue and let it dry then pick it off for the nostalgia.

>>36436099
I bet you masturbate with your hand too

Just cum in the shower without actually taking a shower. All the fun of cumming on the wall or floor, and it's gone next time you do take a shower,

>>36436596
Silly cutfag. You'd have to go years without touching your dick at all for smegma to build up. No washing, no pulling back the foreskin, no masturbating, etc etc.
It would have to be deliberate.

You can do it in the shower. You have no clean up.

>>36436596
There are no upsides to circumcision. It really is a tragedy.

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I usually just cum on my clothes, the floor, whatever's around me that's unfortunate enough to get spattered. Oh, and then there's this nifty jar I forgot about.

I can't cum without porn. :(

I miss being able to masturbate with just purely my imagination.

>>36436660
First time I pulled back my foreskin I was 16. Nobody had ever told me it could do that. I had been masturbating since I was 12.
That shit was literally caked around my penis head

>>36436407
>how
Bad genes.

>>36436528
Fapping in the shower is shit tier, desu.

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>>36436708
Stop porn for a while.
You'll cum bucket just by feeling a breeze on your funny parts.

>>36436099
why is Kleenex better than paper towels?

originally

>>36436815
Should I really start this nofap meme?

>>36436908
>smoothness
>less wasteful
>easier to extract from the paper holding device
>smaller form factor makes it easy to manipulate

>>36436783
>Fapping in the shower is shit tier, desu.
This. Cum gets sticky in the shower.

>>36436933
It's more about no porn.
You'll fail many times, don't beat yourself too much about it.
Small steps. Try to cum as fast as possible so you watch less porn at a time. Then limit yourself to vanilla porn, then pictures, and then nothing.
The time you save not fapping to porn is alone worth it.

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>>36436154
sweet jesus, anon

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>>36436154
Fucking kek

Oregon

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>>36436099
I've just been cumming on pages ripped out of my text books.

>When you used to think you were awesome and hiding your masturbatory habits from your parents because you were never caught
>Years later
>Realise all the cum stained shit your mother had to clean
>The cum smell in your room

>>36437548
I used to fap at the library and do my cummies between pages of random books.

>>36436188
Done this with the same pair of boxers for about 5 years. Always said to myself I'd throw them out after using them but I went to sleep after it and only ended up throwing them out at the start of this year after realizing I probably shouldn't be using the same crusty pair of cum boxers for 5 years. Thankfully they were black so I never seen the amount of shit I was cleaning my dick with.

>>36437548
Why do waifus have that nutsack hairstyle

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>>36437703
idk but I kind of like it. She's growing it out though

I swallow it up, less hassle this way.

>>36437758
what was her youtube agian?