Most pathetic real life stories you ever had.

Meant to say:

>go to the place we are supposed to meet AT

obviously

>>36415965
It was for the best, it would have ended badly anyway

>>36415990
It was correct before and now you changed it to be incorrect. Kill yourself.

>>36415965
>that ending
Audibly kek'd at your life.

>>36416007
Most definately. It would have been terrible. And that's my dating life, guys...

>>36415965
You do not belong here you fucking normalfaggot.
You have enough visual appeal for an actual girl accept to have a date with you.
People here can't even get past hi on a text
And we get the infamous "k" all the time.

I've failed multiple times trying to get the various family dogs to fuck me.

I failed killing myself with pills and opening my throat, so i'm a double failure.

NEET going strong for over a decade

after saving a little girl from drowning and giving her mouth to mouth I fapped to the thought of kissing her lips for YEARS afterwards until my dick stopped working and hasn't recovered.

I don't know man, there are just so fucking many.

>>36416064
OP here, don't panic, I get all of that too, "k", or basically no answer back etc. Before she responded I "applied" to about 100 girls if not even 150, it feels like that. And after her it was all the same. It's not about looks. And I bet a lot of people here are even 8/10 guys but are robots either way because the robot life destroyed their perceptions like it does with me.

>got drunk with a friend at the time and was coerced into going to a brothel and paid for the both of us
>have a 2.5 inch dick so i was nervous but drunk enough to believe it would be ok
>pick my girl and wait in the room and she tells me to wash my self and she leaves
>think i misheard because im a idiot that only knows prositution from movies and thought wtf wash myself r u srs
>she comes back and yells at me for not washing and i apologize, then she strips me and washes me like a child
>sees my small dong and has a little chuckle and says "its so cute its like a baby"
>what little of me left dies inside
>i lay on the bed and she sucks me a bit to get hard and then rides me a bit
>so drunk and nervous and ashamed and disgusted that i couldnt really enjoy it
>after a little while the 30 minutes is up she asks if im going to cum in the next minute
>say maybe and she keep trying but it isnt going to happen so i say thanks anyway
>pay and leave
>walking with friend, he says how awesome it was while i felt like my soul was ripped out of my body
>hit another pub to get drunker and try to forget, then ride the train back to town, have to wait for a taxi
>get angry at my friend for forcing this on me and start punching the fuck out of him
Most pathetic day of my life

File: tmp_18156-14926851462121273691227.jpg (10KB, 270x308px) Image search: [Google]

10KB, 270x308px

>>36416073
until my dick stopped working and hasn't recovered.

File: 1492264932530.png (258KB, 402x648px) Image search: [Google]

258KB, 402x648px

>>36416073
Jesus christ I thought i was a degenerate

>>36416123
>get angry at my friend for forcing this on me and start punching the fuck out of him

That is the MOST pathetic part of your whole story.

File: 67567980.png (953KB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]

953KB, 1280x720px

>>36416123

>nervous and ashamed and disgusted that i couldnt really enjoy it

I can understand this specific feel and what you went through that night anon. Holy shit. Did you ever explain to him why you started punching the fuck out of his or did he just write it off as drunken stupidity? Christ I understand that friends want you to do crazy shit with them sometimes but....fuck man. That hurts.

Bump for interest.

What do they mean it's not original?

>>36416205
He played it off as drunken stupidity but i can tell he never really got over it and we stopped talking shortly after

>>36416123
>have a 2.5 inch dick
Erect? How?

>>36416232
What the fuck do you mean how? How do i even answer that? Its just the shit hand i was dealt

>>36416244
Post pics for medical curiosity.

>>36416123
I wish America has brothels.

>>36416138

It's true, I can't even get an erection anymore. From anything. It's been like four years since I fapped, and all I want to do is cum normally.

>>36416151

You can always say, 'well at least i'm not THAT guy', so chin up bro.

>>36416271
Do you have any more glorious stories?

There was my suicide and being clinically dead for a while. But I told that one.

>>36416307
I always wondered, what do they do with you after suicide attempts like that one? Do they lock you up in a hospital or somewhere?

>>36416307
Did you mean to post with your trip on?

>>36416227

Sounded like he just wanted to have fun with his bro, not knowing the full consequences of what he was doing. Sucks for both of you, honestly, I'm sorry to hear that anon. I hope you can get your friend back someday, even if that's a forgone thing. I dunno man, sorry, that story just hit me right in the feels because i had a similar experience. Gave up on women afterwards, haven't talked to one besides my mom since.

>be 13 oneitis is really flirty
>work up my courage to ask her out
>wait in a dark alley for her
>know she likes crossing through there
>wait for 10 minutes like a creepy moron
>nervous as hell I see her coming.jpg
>h-hi oneitis
>grab her hand like an autist an say the words
>w-will u be my gf
>she says I I dont know anon
>I insist like some fucked up rapist hiding in a dark alley for her
>she eventually says yes and I give her a kiss on the cheek
>awkwardly go back to my home and she goes to her friends
>realize how much of a rapist I must have seemed
>decide to avoid her
>she goes to the same school as I do
>completely avoid her she is looking for me
>tell one of her friends I dont want to see her
>tfw realize im not worthy enough to be with her
>tfw shes smart and popular and im just a loser cuck
>she moves schools and city
>tfw I had a gf

>>36416454
Still better than my story in OP.

>>36416337

They have a guy come and give you an eval, but you almost always end up on an involuntary psych hold for at least 3 days. I was stuck in mine for two weeks because I wouldn't sign their stupid papers, actually having to go to fucking family court and make my case on why I should be released and not held prisoner anymore.

It's funny, you go through life with nobody giving two shits, then when you want to end it, suddenly everyone jumps up your ass saying you have so much to live for. funniest fucking thing ever.

>>36416289

one time when my parents left to go to the casino and have a night out, i stayed home, put on my mom's robe, bra, filled the bra with shirts so it looks like i had multi-colored tits, put on lipstick, propped a folding chair up and fucked myself in the ass with all four legs of it, pretending I was the object of desire in a train-running scenario.

i tried to fuck my neighbor's dog in the woods once. volunteered to take him for walks, since my neighbor is a fatass lazy bitch and the dog is athletic and needs exercise. anyway, we're about two hours into the woods, so i take a break and we sit down and have snacks and drink some water, and get the bright idea that, hey, holy shit, i'm alone and this dog is actually big enough to suck off. so long story short, I ended up sucking a big fat red dog penis in the woods and had him blast my mouth with cum. was the hottest shit ever man.

once in middle school, there was this ugly girl that looked like a guy that i didn't know was a girl, and she was huge and muscular like a guy, so it was double confusing. it was winter and icy, and she shoved my friend, who hit the ground HARD and busted his nose all up, blood everywhere. so after school when this behemoth was walking home I jumped her. big mistake. she fought me off like swatting flies. i was a pretty big dude even then, but this bitch literally lifted me over her head and slammed me into the ground like it was the goddamn WWF.

>>36416454
Thats just some dumb shit you did as a kid
This post reeks of normie

>>36415965
Kek, What the fuck is wrong with you OP? You literally just needed to walk 10 more meters.10. FUCKING. METERS. She already saw you so you should've just finished what you started. Might've even lost your v-card. Guess we'll never know because you're such a colossal faggot.

>>36416569
Fuck i feel like you would be fun to get drunk with

>>36416572
Suck my cock you fucking faggot.

>>36416569
>suddenly everyone jumps up your ass saying you have so much to live for. funniest fucking thing ever.

Yeah, I LOVE IT... not.

>>36416578
Normie detected. No, she haven't seen me, she was sitting the other way around and was looking around and never could possibly see me.

And I know.

>>36416615

I'm always afraid i'll do something incredibly stupid when i'm drunk, even though every stupid thing i've ever done was when I was stone cold sober.

I wouldn't mind getting drunk with another bot, so long as you don't mind awkwardness and hanging out at home, since that's what I like to do when i'm drinking; just playin' games online, shooting kids, shit talking, smokin' the weed, eatin' some anti anxiety meds. You know, havin' chill time. Also anime. Can't do much PC stuff otherwise an oldschool LAN type party would be the shit.

File: IMG_6201.png (214KB, 465x531px) Image search: [Google]

214KB, 465x531px

>>36416638
>normie detected
What baffles me the most about you guys is you constantly whine and complain like bitches about wanting a gf and "le the face when no gf maymays xDDD le Pepe no gf XDDDDD", but then turn around and reprimand people for giving advice for trying to fix the same problem you complain about. Which one is it faggot? Do you want a gf or not ? I'm assuming it's the latter, so stay in your basement and rot you fool.

File: 2ef.png (814KB, 604x717px)

814KB, 604x717px

>>36416123
>get angry at my friend for forcing this on me and start punching the fuck out of him
you cut this story way too short anon

>>36416741
You know, internet is not you and just one, another person...

>>36416337
I didn't stick around to find out

>>36415965
looks and dick size really dont matter. even if you are a pro at blending in. like me. you will remain a robot.
i have had women hint at their attraction to me and i turn them down because i know they will find out how i really am when i am not being watched by society.
especially female coworkers when i used to work. they would talk to me and try to get to know me and i would just ignore them.

>>36416789
>literally can't fit in a Ford F850

>>36416777
That was directed to just him, but those who share that same mindset, aka more than half of r9k with the "NORMIE REEEE GF" mentality.

>>36416676
Everything you described sounds mighty comfy anon

>>36417108

Gotta keep it comfy, the only time i'm ever at peace is when i'm bombed out on klonopin and smoked out of my gourd. Any activity is good to go then. But i'm a home body at heart would rather do my stupid weeb activities with a bro. Just got Samurai Warriors 2 again for 360, if anyone wants to chop some niggas or go on blops2. No mic though, it got stomped on and busted.

>>36416073
sexy how old

>>36417423

Am 32 now.

>>36417423
>>36417942
He means the girl

>>36418018

Oh, duh. Well fuck, I have no idea honestly, she wasn't that big and didn't weigh much when I pulled her out of the lake. Between 8-10 maybe? I'm shit at guessing kid's ages.

Did chest compressions and teased her nipples, tilted her head back and gave her mouth to mouth. Her lips were slim and sweet and she tasted like strawberries and grilled burgers. Was delicious man. Coughed up some water, ambulence came to check her out cuz her stupid neglectful parents called 911 while i was doing the cpr(emphasis on CP, dooooohohohohoh) but by that time I was long gone since I didn't want none of that shit. did my good deed and booked it home.

She was just so small and frail looking, I wanted to protect her and touch her and kiss her tiny abdomens. S'why I felt so bad about the rabid fapping over a nearly-dead kid.

File: 1492616215838871_s.jpg (6KB, 130x125px) Image search: [Google]

6KB, 130x125px

>>36415965
>be me
>16 1/2 years old
>in highschool
>brought up by ultra-conservative parents
>think abstinence is alright, porn/sex/gf is evil
>still a porn addict
>there's this cute girl in my class
>have a crush on her
>everyone can see it
>everyone teases me about me
>literally cannot take
>go mad
>one day a classmate teases me about my porn habits
>can't take it any longer
>"actually, I cannot get erections"
>spreads throughout school
>everyone still knows me as the erectionless dude