How do I make a body pillow feel like a real living person?

>>36349594
get a realdoll

>>36349719
that's too uncanny valley. I don't want to hug a corpse

>>36349975
Fuck, I just wanted to tell you to get a corpse.

>>36349594
I'll cuddle with you OP~
that is if we're near each other

>>36350817
I can't cuddle a boy that's gay dude

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>>36350840
You won't be gay with me?~

>>36350906
nah dude

no homo

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>>36350840
its not gay if you say no homo op

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>>36350840
is cuddling gay if it's two femboys doing it?

>>36350840
It's not gay if it's platonic cuddling.

>>36351051
definitely gay
>>36351026
I'm not a femboy

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>>36351115
it was just a rhetorical question sorry

>tfw no girl will ever willingly hug you, not because you ask her to or pay her to
being a KHV is unbearable

it's giving me brain damage

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>>36351026
Only if you're thinking of them as a boy. If you use their femboy state to mentally pretend that they're a girl, it's not.

>>36349594
Hire an escort. There's one I want to hire around here who looks like a real life anime, but I want to concentrate on finding a real wife to make cute daughters with.

>>36351930
hiring an escort sounds like one of the most awkward anxiety inducing things that exists

I would cry. I would cry right there and she would tell me to go home. she might even refund me out of pity

>>36352592
>I would cry. I would cry right there and she would tell me to go home.

But why? Consider the hypothetical scenario: anime was real. Would you cry in front of your waifu?

>>36352921
that's not analogous at all

if I had to pay my waifu to spend time with me, and I knew that she didn't actually like me or give a shit about me, and she was short with me because my timid indecisive personality was wasting her time?

yes I would cry

>>36353216
But they're paid to be an escort. Just be calm and make sure she offers a gfe. Then you'll have your cuddling.

>>36353329
they're paid to give rich businessmen the sucky sucky

they're not paid to teach ugly sub nerds about intimacy

>>36352921
>Would you cry in front of your waifu?
Yes.

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>>36353560
Jeez,h ave confidence man. Imagine what she would say in response.

>>36353747
she would say "kimochi warui" just like asuka

>>36349594
Much is a pervert, a cute one!!

>>36349594
Add electric blanket and hot water packs for bobs

How do I simulate facesitting with household objects?