ITT: moments where you went full autismo

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I had something a bit simular.

I started crying while playing HL2 as I saw a car tire hanging from a tree. It reminded me of my childhood lost to time.

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It's not OP-tier but
>Playing mount and blade mod
>Used to be a peasant but finally moved up in the world, conquesting with the big boys
>Friends with everyone in my faction
>They love me and our king respects me
>Decide it's time to get a lady since I'm finally a noble that is deserving of marriage
>Visit her every week, tell her stories and poems
>She loves me, I'm actually going to make her mine
>Fast foward a few weeks later
>She doesn't call for me
>thefuck.png
>Check on her to see what's wrong
>She's fallen in love with another
>It's my best friend in our alliance
>quickly leave her chamber's to confront Lord Renaudas on his treacherous actions
>tells me to fuck off because he's been checking her out since the beginning
>emotionally break down as I'm literally KEKED by my BEST FRIEND
>I leave our faction, rallying up some of my friends inside and decide to wage war against them
>Puts us in a civil wae that divides our nation entirely
>Winning the war but shedding tears and feeling a rush of contracting emotions as I slay those who were once my friends and comrades
>tfw still at war today all because of one woman

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>>36314243
this is a really nice post

>>36314243
man is the animal, as they said. I feel you.

>>36313969
HL2 has that vibe of lonelines and vague references.

>fallout new Vegas
>roleplaying hard as a kindhearted loner with a lot of addiction and trust issue
>aka me
>spend the whole time trying to help the helpless, while fucked up on drugs and alcohol both in game and IRL
>often forget people Ive interacted with
>sometimes come across ppl who know me or thank me, but just like real life the interactions are just hay thanks~ and these people lose all depth and just repeat themselves from now on and continue with their daily lives that don't involve me
>my insignificance slowly sets in
>sitting at a camp fire drinking whiskey and popping mentats looking into the horizon as sun sets, knowing somewhere out there a tragedy is happening and I'm happy to be isolated and comfy by my fire
>have overwhelming IRL feels to just leave society and its distant, cold inhabitants behind
>put down controller as I crush up oxys and watch the camera slowly circle my sad, lonely, addicted weirdo of a character

>game with character customization
>spend hours creating your perfect girl
>never actually play

>>36314672
this hits near home. I did the same things what the hell.

>>36314704
It can hit you pretty hard, anon. I understand. Sometimes all i wish is to live in the new vegas world. Theres something there that calls to me. Im even considering moving to rural mexico to live in a shack and live a life thatll eventually put me in an early grave

Don't let the autismo thread die yet

>>36315334
My posts always kill threads.

>>36313280
top kek i actually did this myself once. sitting on stat tower and taking the death leap with a tear falling out of my eye, that is. i spent most of my SA days just wandering and driving around without purpose. i loved the northern forest area to just walk around in and look at the nature.

>>36314243
Women are the root of all evil
orige

>>36315404
nah but mine always do. but i guess these typical /r9k/ threads need to die for yet another trap thread. anyone else miss the old /r9k/ before it was taken over by homosexuals? it was much more comfy back then. nowadays they're even spamming literal gayporn on here making /r9k/ almost unbrowsable. i always enjoyed the /neet/ threads the most.

i was a wagecuck back then and pretended to be a NEET making other wagecucks mad while shitposting fron ny job in retail. I always spended hours upon hoyrs either takinf smoke breaks or pretending to use the toilet and browsing /r9k/. i was still so innocent back then. sorry for the blogpost by the way.

>playing Sims 3 and create myself
>like to do this everyone once in awhile for motivation
>start from modest begginings
>slowly work my way up to an awesome, rich life of a king
>examine and take notes to become my Sim me
>shower everyday, eat breakfast, do good at work, come home and work out of perfect some intellectual skill, etc
>its so easy in game my stat bars just keep growing all it takes its persistence and practice
>have my daily routine planned out on paper, I saw it in action in the game now to make it a reality
>even have a homemade RPG stat sheet to record my achievements and level
>after 3 almost productive days I feel mental and physical exhaustion
>motivation vanishes and my life long depression kicks into full gear
>realize I suck at every thing and stop leaving my room
>use r9k and cry a lot
>I'll never be like my sim

>>36313280
This was the funniest shit ive read in a while op

>>36315517
nah the worst are the shitty race bait threads.
Literally go to /pol/ for that shit.

Now R9k has made the chad boogieman black.

>rome total war
>had too much population as romans
>made tons of town watch (one of shittiest melee units)
>assign them my worst commander
>dumb, ugly infertile drunkard with poor health
>somehow they survive several battles
>at the end of west euro campaign commander is one of my best (8 stars)
>tons of useful companions
>town watch is all gold levels
>send them to egypt
>get cocky and fight two armies at once
>lost half of them, but managed to destroy first army
>second army routs them
>they are too tired to run
>send commander to occupy enemy while retreating
>most of second half of army manages to escape
>commander also somehow managed to survive
>as he is nearing edge of map one unit of archers fire last volley
>no one dies except commander
>angry at this point, but at least manage to save my army
>enemy attacks me second time
>this time they just shoot my army to pieces because I have no way to retaliate without my commander
>rage quit and uninstall game

>>36315602
REEEEEEEEE NORMIES LEAVE REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

>>36315610
i forgot to mention those, but yeah you are correct. they both started appearing around the same time as the gay threads started appearing. both trying to ''appear'' as other threads. but now they just go full force.

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>>36315585
I'm sorry, Anon. That was a sad read. I tend to find enjoyment in just pretending I'm self-improving and am living the dream.
Like pretending to have homework to feel like a teenager again.

>>36315672
>Ik ben niet de enige Nederlander die huiswerk maakt alsof hij nog op de middelbare school zit en een autistische takenlijst maakt voor de volgende dag
Hoi

>be me
>8 years old
>playing GoldenEye on n64 in livingroom
>accidentally shoot Natalia in the boob
>notice her boob is now bloody
>start shooting the fucking out of her fits and they get nice and fuckef up looking
>raging 8yr old boner and feelings I never experienced before
>hear a noise behind me,
>my mom was watching the whole time
>19 years later I fap to pics of gorey dead women
>idk man

>>36315719
>Shit, ik wist dat het ooit zou gebeuren
Morgen de eerste vrije dag sinds Decemeber, laat 'em tellen.

>>36315798
Ik ben nu al een tijdje voltijdig NEET dus ik heb geen last van werk op dit moment. Ik ben bezig met het zoeken naar een baan, maar dit blijkt moeilijker dan ik verwacht had.

>>36315844
Ben d'r geweest, heb het gedaan. NEET zijn is onderhand kutter dan een baan hebben.

>>36315585

Your sim didn't quit after three days

then again, your sim had the direct hand of god guiding him and didn't have to deal with depression and shit.

I wish there was a less PG version of the sims with mental disorders and diseases and shit, I'd play that all day.

>>36314243
Holy fuck im pumped for the new mount and blade coming out this year

>>36315950
Ja dat merk ik nuzelf ook. Vooral de teleurstelling die ik mijn ouders aandoe doet meer pijn dan er kan ontstaan door het werken. Daarom ben ik ook op zoek naar een baan. Hopelijk kan ik er een vinden snel. Ik wist trouwens echt niet dat er uberhaupt meer Nederlanders waren op /r9k/. Ik beschouwde Nederland altijd als een land vol met normies.

>>36315968
>I wish there was a less PG version of the sims with mental disorders and diseases and shit, I'd play that all day.

It's like working as a trucker and playing eurotruck simulator.

>>36316027
>this year
Never ever anon

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>>36316031
>Ik wist trouwens echt niet dat er uberhaupt meer Nederlanders waren op /r9k/
Je zult schrikken van /pol/, maar de meeste hier melden het niet eens. Misschien blur ik de tekst in m'n foto de volgende keer..

>>36315614
Just make peasants, send them to a province which needs population and then disband them there

>>36315585
LOL I used to do that a lot and it actually helped.
I'll launch the game again tonight in your honor anon.

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>>36314674
I've done this more than once too anon...

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>>36314674
There's a reason we're on this board.

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>>36315460
>"Roasties" still being typical "roasties" in my games
Reeeeeeeeeeeee!! I've still yet to find that cucking son of a bitch

>>36316027
Same here
>inb4 delayed again

>>36316170
Im going to give it another go. Im feeling better and in an easier spot to do this right. Pray for me to have unstoppable motivation! Ive even improved my rpg irl character sheets. Its more realistic this time around. Godspeed

>>36316296
Good luck to you, kind anon.

>>36313280
Someone stole your thread and is posting on /v/

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>>36314674
i think there is the possibility that many of us may know that feel my dude

I never actually completed FFX despite claiming that it is one of my all time favorites and was the only FF I ever played (rec'd by cousin who sent it to me) I was a little younger and didn't fully understand the sphere grid so I made my characters really shity and got my self into a corner with an ubeatable boss and the next save point I couldn't reach. I was so frustrated trying to take on the boss and failing so many times. ONCE I actually beat the boss by sheer luck and discovered that I would run into another obstacle right before the next save point..

I often think about that game and how much I enjoyed it as well as enjoyed most of my childhood and teen years up thru high school.. but not finishing that game feels like an actual regret for not accomplishing it.. even though it's a game and is essentially meaningless.
That is a metaphor for my life though.. essentially meaningless and full of half asses accomplishments

>>tfw the copy is scratched now and I'm too poor to get another/too stupid to emulate it (I tried)

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>>36313280
>be playing the Sims
>roll a sim to live on his own.
>he goes out to make friends
>he has a career and a place of his own
>regularly goes to the gym
>pimps all the local lady sims
>all of the things I don't have

>watching my sim running on a treadmill at the gym
>suddenly become intensely aware that I'm literally playing a digital dolls house
>living vicariously through the accomplishments of this sim

>begin journey self-improvement
>many years later I am much happier
>have many of the things I never thought I could have at that time

>>36316679
>begin journey self-improvement
>many years later I am much happier

How the fuck do you people manage to do this?
I've been trying to go to gym regularly for 3 years. Yes, I've made some progress, but I can't understand how do people make it a habit. I'm either tired as fuck after working/studying or just don't have any free time at all.

>>36316296
post irl character sheets

Don't you guys realize video games are your only problem in life?

Also, OP, like CJ, if you work out and eat right you can be in shape.

>>36317136
>Don't you guys realize video games are your only problem in life?

I don't even play games anymore. Nice bait, though.

>>36316767
It isn't linear improvement with time, there are many ups and downs. Also yes it is hard.

Start off feeling like a piece of shit for X Y and Z reasons.
Begin solving problems X Y and Z.
For me that was being fat, neet, living with my mum, and a virgin.

After about a year I had lost some weight and gained some confidence, got a shitty job, got a shitty place to live, actively learned social skills and pickup to lose my virginity.

Eventually you realise that confidence and happiness aren't about your circumstances and accomplishments, because these things are external to you and things can happen to them that are not within your control. So your paradigm for confidence shifts from "having" to "doing". So now I get to be confident because I am always trying to improve, I always work hard etc.

This mentality leads to a lot of tension and burnout, and maybe you'll give up and relapse into shitty habits again and slip back into a rut.

Eventually you realise that confidence and happiness aren't things to be striven for, they're not an external thing that you need to attain, they're actually your inherent default state, and unresolved emotional issues have always been the real reason why you could never be happy or confident. So your paradigm for confidence shifts from "doing" to "being". So now I get to be confident... just because.

Turns out all those times you heard "just b urself", they were actually talking about this. But its the process of forgiving and accepting yourself for your flaws. Delving into your subconcious and letting go of the repressed pain that has been festering down there and controlling you for so long. All of which is a very involved process and too much to be expressed by a platitude by people who have never had to struggle.

>Playing World of Tanks
>Using the KV-2 with the huge turret (before they split it into two separate tanks)
>Encounter a T-28 on my own
>The guy uses his speed to stay out of the way of my gun all while gradually taking my HP away until he ends me

>WoT again, different game
>The game is down to only one player on each team - artillery
>Both using the Grille
>He is approaching our base with about 10 seconds on the clock
>I see him close range coming around a corner
>Take a shot but miss
>He starts turning towards me and I start trying to manoeuvrer out of his way
>5 seconds
>He takes a shot and one hit kills me - winning the game for his team

I felt both useless and a failure in both situations

>>36316783
If this thread is around when i get home ill post them. Basically tho, its a weekly schedule with tasks and goals spread throughout the week and stuff i should do everyday. Ive assigned xp to all the tasks. Less for easy more for harder stuff. Each level up or achievement i reach, i reward myself. Such as ordering pizza or get to fap after no fap.Ive also incorporated a money budget into it to save money and buy shit i need. Like a car. Its pretty messy i guess. ive formatted it to my personal liking so it would look like shit to someone who makes spreadsheets and shit.

>>36317474
Also i drew a picture of me and have equipment slots and an inventory list so i know what i need and already have. And special abilities lol. One of my special abilities is a 7 inch dick. It would suck if anyone found these actually

>>36315517
Everything changed when robots started calling each other normie and fighting to be the biggest looser. I havent seen a /comfy/ thread, nightwalking or even retailcuck in a while. The things we should be bonding over are making way for endless division along invisible lines while bored anons post effortless bait and cap thread after thread

>>36317136
Video games and anime are forms of escapism, which are symptoms of people's problems.

>>36317873
this is a good thread though.

>>36317474
>>36317608
i like this idea. i used to make spreadsheets. i would spend hours creating and formatting them and then i would fill them out for a few weeks before dropping.

i remember this one i made that i really liked, where i had it set to color code the day based on the number rating i gave it, i think based on how many positive activities i did that day. it was on a scale between green and red, with bright green being most good things and bright red meaning that i did nothing worthwhile. it helped a bit but i stopped within a month when i hit a period of inactivity.

also had an hour by hour daily color coded sleep schedule recorder at one time. it also had a sleep to wake ratio and running average of daily sleep time that was scaled to color. that time it actually helped me because i could easily see the waking hours and sleeping hours and how there were too many or too few and how they shifted down the line until i was mostly sleeping at night and up during the day. dropped that too but it did help for a while.

i like making spreadsheets but now i try to record things in less elaborate ways. i still record what i do but now that i am being more consistent, i have just kept a text document listing positive daily activities since the end of last year. sometime it's nice to go back through it and be able to see that you have made a bit of progress. i think i would also be embarrassed if someone found all of my shit. i have never made anything in your format but it sounds like a decent idea if it helps you.

>>36316130
I know, but just love putting those shitty armies in the field.

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>>36316027
I feel you anon I really do originally as well

>>36317352
I'm happy for you, my guy.

>>36317873
There have been 3 comfy threads in the last 2 days, that I've seen. But the nightwalking and retail cucks have disappeared, you're right.

>>36318125
I think alot of vidya addict bros could benefit from an irl rpg life tracker. I dont have a computer, but if you like spreadsheets and are good at it maybe you should make a template? You could make some positive changes in a few robot lives. It can be like those personal infosheets that get posted here. Think about it talented anon

>>36313280
woah this is actually sad.