Anyone else here literally cant talk? Like, I literally never

>>36233844
Every day. Small talk is stupid and pointless anyway.

If you don't have something useful to say why bother saying it?

>>36233844
Talk about immediate news/shared friends/the local environment and people

>>36233844
That's called autism my friend.

>>36233865
I agree it's pointless, but it's pretty much impossible to have a social life without it

>>36233875
I've tried a couple of those already, generally just leads me to a dead end in the conversation
Like talking about local news. "Did you hear about that warehouse next to the airport that burned down a couple days ago" "yeah..." And it basically ends there, I need someone else to carry the conversation for me at this point, othwerwise we go back to the awkward silence and staring at eachother

Ask questions, man. Not rocket science.

I used to be like you, then discovered this magic trick. I look at the other person in the eye, smile with the corner of my mouth and ask the first thing that comes to mind. There's a few all purpose questions like
>how are you doing
>where are you from
>what are you doing in this place
>*ask about clothing/accessories*
>*if they're with friend* how do you know each other?

The worst experience of my life in recent memory was when I was forced to go to a cousins wedding. I met my other cousin, a female, again. She was like "hey!!!" and I was like "hi" and she was like "been a long time eh!!" and I was like is she blaming me or something? It's not my fault they're religious nuts who ostracized me because I didn't want to be involved with their cult (they forced me to go sunday 'school' a few times when I had to stay there as a kid)

Anyway I was just like "yeah" and then just stood there silently. I could see her awkward. At first I felt awkward too, but then it passed and I didn't care, and I enjoyed the control I had over her.

Man I'd love more control over her, if you know what I mean. One time we hugged and it felt really good. Too good. But we're not actually blood related, so it's totally okay. Not that I'd give a shit even if it's incestual. Who cares.

I'm autistic, aren't I?

>>36233941
You sound like an obnoxious person.

Do you have any irl friends?

>>36233941
>>*ask about clothing/accessories*
but literally who gives a shit? This is so stupid I wouldn't even think to do it.

Fucking christ I hate normies. I DONT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT YOUR BELT MATE. AND I'M NOT THE ONE WHO'S WRONG FOR FEELING THIS WAY.

>>36233865
it's a useful way to transition into more topical or meaningful discussion, moran

>>36233916
I know senpai, I'm trying to fix my autism

>>36233941
Never tried that, but sound like a good idea, thanks. Just hope they don't start asking back too much, My answers tend to be typical short-sentences autismo

>>36233962
Not many, but I understand social interaction. I suck at keeping friends cause I'm a huge dick and I can't help it for too long.

So you get an idea, last friend I lost was because I broke his nose while I was drunk for no reason. I'm that level of retarded.

>>36234013
Yeah you sound like a jackass

pretty easy to not hit people mate even when drinking

>>36233967
It's mostly for girls If a girl has a nice necklace, for example, you can ask her about it and there's probably a story behind it. For guys it works in particular cases, like if they have a shirt that says, let's say, "Uruguay", you can ask them if they visited Uruguay.

>>36233971
>My answers tend to be typical short-sentences autismo
One liners are great for this. The idea is to make the other person talk about themselves. For me it usually goes like
>question
>"answer"
>remark about answer
>wait for reaction
>ask another question
Remark is usually being funny (haha I can imagine that), a compliment (wow that's so cool), teasing (you sound like a nerd) or a related anecdote.
Doesn't make you the badest fucker around but it makes small talk possible. At least for me.

>>36234131
I feel like this is more autistic than just being autistic and not talking to people.

>>36234039
I know. I wish I could change. I'm tired of doing stupid shit and driving people away.

That's why I love 4chan. I don't have to worry about making everyone upset every time I say something.

>>36234131
Thanks. Just a quick question though, is simply saying "nice" good enough for the remark part, or would it be too much autism?

>>36234150
Small talk is just for breaking the ice anyways. Once you get the conversation going things flow more naturally.

>I can only speak to someone if the conversation has a well defined topic
Small talk is what allows the space between topic and topic to not be a complete awkward mess.

>>36234209
Is it only me who doesn't mind the awkward part (mostly it's the other person anyway, I don't care..) and would VASTLY prefer it over hearing the normies talk about their vapid bullshit?

>>36234179
Sure, though it can be a conversation killer. An early conversation nice with no follow up might end up in awkward silence which sucks dick.

>>36234226
I'd also like to fart in class and I wouldn't mind if other people did it.

>>36234246
kay, thanks for taking your time in my thread. i'll try practicing this stuff next time im in one of these situations. guess it can only work if I try it and get some experience

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14KB, 223x200px

>>36233844
There's nothing to talk about with people who spout the same basic nonsense every day

>>36233941
>interrogation questions

>>36234280
No prob, I like helping other anons just like other anons helped me in the past.

>>36233941
Don't ask interrogative things like this because it makes you come off as weird or a fed. Just ask what sort of hobbies they're into as a start and let it branch out from there on its own. If they ask about yours just give a quick list off the top of your head with a few details on things you're really into. Say cars for example you could add "yeah I'm actually working on fixing up an old x right now" or "I'm taking classes right now to become x", don't sperg out and give them some huge essay. Beyond the introduction people really only talk about their experiences together, plans and mutual interests.

>>36233844
>tfw small talk serves to make others more comfortable but you literally cannot give a fuck due to autism

I was born into the awkwardness, molded by it. I LIVE for making normies uncomfortable on subconscious levels.

>>36233865
Its just a way of interacting with someone