Feels Thread

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>>36231332
Lately I've been feeling like shit because I truly truly don't have anything to make me feel at peace. it used to be video games but that stopped helping years ago. I masturbate about 4-5 times a day so that I don't feel like killing myself constantly. The only thing that I can think of doing to make the days go by faster and to feel better about being alive is just laying in bed with some food and watching youtube or anime.

I'm miserable. Alone. Unhappy. Nobody wants me. I feel like discarded trash. People will take a liking to me at first but quickly ghost me or be hateful to me. I guess because something is wrong with me fundamentally I'm still trying to figure it out.

It's wired knowing that some things in my life change never to go back to the way they were. Even things I see on the horizon. Soon major changes will happen that will change my life and things will never be the same for the entire rest of my existence. It's funny to thing how the life I lived as a child is gone and will never be back for the entire existence of the universe. That was it.

>>36232055
you're probably boring
you're probably not boring though. normies just have this thought process that if you're not laughing, joking, and setting up plans with them within the first few minutes of talking with them for the first time then you're not worth the their time.

i've never posted in one of these before, but i need to get a lot of shit off my chest

i'm 28, i'm living in a small-ish town in the bible belt of the USA, and i work in the service industry as a bartender (not the cool kind, more like the 'family friendly' bartender)

i don't make shit, i don't have a college degree, and i'm out of shape. i was dating a girl for a couple years but she broke up with me so she could be single (read: fuck other guys). i actually moved to this town just to be with her while she attended college.

so now i think about her all the time, and it brings up a lot of spite and anger thinking of all the stuff i did for her along the way of our relationship. i really upset her when i told her that her and i couldn't be friends anymore because of her lifestyle (read: fucking other guys) and we cut off all communication....for like the third time.

so now i'm laying in bed, in my apartment, browsing 4chan when i said i'd quit this place several times but keep coming back, and i'm trying to figure out what is wrong with my mindset and where i need to change stuff. i just started back at the gym and i'm going hard into a keto diet to trim off the fat (15-18% BF right now), but it feels like there's something else that's missing, an intangible.

but i've got a job interview tomorrow at a great restaurant, a fine-dining experience where i can really shine so i need to muster up the balls to wow them in the interview.

but even if i get it, i'm still just some asshole waiting tables who has almost zero romantic interests, save for some single mom that just wants penis every so often but is impossible to get a hold of. and i feel like my potential is completely untapped.

what sort of mindset do i need to have? how do i need to change my thinking? where should i really be right now in the world?

hopefully i can get my shit straight soon, my 10 year class reunion is coming up and i don't want to seem like a scrub.

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who else has some feels to share