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Anonymous
Permanent suicide watch 2017-04-12 09:05:00 Post No. 36207429
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Permanent suicide watch 2017-04-12 09:05:00 Post No. 36207429
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Not your average sob story "help robots I'm sad and do nothing about it" post
>be me age 5
>"dad I don't think life is worth all the pain, can I be killed"
>get taken to hospital and diagnosed with severe clinical depression
>doc tells parents I don't have proper brain receptors for dopamine and other chemicals that make up happiness
> be me in elementary school through middle school
> can't feel happy but realize it's good to make others happy
> beat up and outcasted / bullied all that time for being an emotionless freak (they don't realize I can still feel pain / sorrow)
> be me in highschool
> find a friend group finally
> they all kill themselves in suicide pact and I get hospitalized for trama
> get out and start student teaching in junior year
> 2 co-workers at gamestop and 2 students kill themselves
> back to hospital and find a gf while I'm there
> she stabs me and rapes me that year and I'm back in the hospital
> I double up on classes while in the hospital and graduate early to get the fuck out of there
> move out at sixteen from saving up from working at gamestop
> both of my roommates kill themselves that year
> go through a year of college while working to be a musician because music lets me display emotions I can't explain
> find gf at the end of the year and she tries to kill me in my sleep
> Be me april 11th 2017
> "Hey anon, we've reviewed everything and you have been following all procedures correctly, you took all the medicines we could try (i was on anti-depression meds for 13 years and ran out of legal ones to try), I think the best thing to do here is just give it time"
TFW when my award winning therapist tells me "we have no other options then to wait".
I'm beyond hollow at this point and only live my life so others don't have to feel the pain of losing someone to suicide. I'm not looking for answers anymore because I know there aren't any. I'm legitimately just fucked and I just deal with it.
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good luck anon, i hope you make it (orig)
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you seem like a nice person anyway
I've felt similarly (not as intense, occasionally feel happiness).
Why are so many people killing themselves around you. It's not your fault from what you've written, but maybe you're just drawn to these people? Or maybe it's like that guy who was struck by lightning 8 times in his life, just a fluke.
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OP here. None of this happened btw
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>>36207530
I'm OP this all happened and more. I don't have the space to type it all up
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>>36207429
> they all kill themselves in suicide pact
> 2 co-workers at gamestop and 2 students kill themselves
> she stabs me and rapes me
> both of my roommates kill themselves
> find gf at the end of the year and she tries to kill me in my sleep
Are you cured or something like that ?
And
> "Hey anon, we've reviewed everything and you have been following all procedures correctly, you took all the medicines we could try (i was on anti-depression meds for 13 years and ran out of legal ones to try), I think the best thing to do here is just give it time"
I think it's time to leave..
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>>36207552
Original OP, I am a serial slaughterer who someone managed to make every one of my peers' murderers look like suicide.
Watch out, I'll dox you and fuck your shit up, bitch.
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>>36207552
I statistically cannot believe that many people have killed themselves around you.
More likely your schizophrenic
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>>36207581
somehow**
sorry my literary waned along with brain chemtrails @ berf lol.
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>>36207582
Nope, I just have shit luck I guess. But I have wondered if I make people want to kill themselves for some reason
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>>36207633
Yeah, yea, yer, yeh.
It's a wonder you haven't just fuckin' killed yourself yet, ay. There's obviously something about you that compels others people to die, something deeply sinister. I'd keep my distance well from you.
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>>36207429
>diagnosed with severe clinical depression under 12
So is this based off shit or do you just make bad made up stories this badly?
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if you can't live for lack joy, then be fueled by rage.
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>I just deal with it
Thats what men do
But wow that's a lot of people who killed them self.
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OP could be a superhero, he just has to hang out with all the evil people so they kill themselves
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