alright normies, how do i actually get a gf? pls no dumb shit

>>36097389
>implying there is a magical way

>>36097389
>no dumb shit like "lose weight" or "go outside" or "join a book club"

Well that rules out healthy, pretty, and caring qts
Your only hope is to be funny or smart, but you're on /r9k/ so that's probably not likely.

I got nuttin, good luck

File: biDFHU0.gif (967KB, 270x252px) Image search: [Google]

967KB, 270x252px

>>36097389
>lift
>read
>meditate
>keto diet
>find hobby
>inb4 pseudo-chad

>>36097389
go talk to women, you have to level up your stats in conversation and charm before you can go for unlocking the 'significant other' track

>>36097389
>"go outside"
You do actually need to do this. No cute girl is just going to come waltzing into your basement lair.

>just be funny and smart and gf will materialize from the Void
>"lift" heavy things, "Read" harry potter, sit in a room with your eyes closed, eat better and gf will summon for 15 mana

>>>36097943
>harass random women who probably get harassed the same way dozens of times of day and gf will fall from the heavens
You faggot fucks are fucking hopeless, since the snarky reddit replies are already out of the way there is no avenue but prostitution and rape,

File: 1383711300603.jpg (30KB, 396x396px) Image search: [Google]

30KB, 396x396px

>>36097389
>wanting succubi

>>36098011
>implying girl will fuck an autistic robot with no discernible skills

>>36097995
I have a fucking job you faggot fucking retard. I thought I explicitly stated no "lel u teh n3ckbe4rdz0rrrr" unfunny bullshit.

>"LEL i implied he lived in his basement and subsists on cheetoes and RC COla Dxd so funnay xDD reddiut goold"

>>36097995
your not gonna get approached in the supermarket either so whats your point. unless you're a normie going outside will have no effect on your chances of finding a gf

>>36098067
So you're "implying" women are attracted to men with discernible skills?

>"omg anon u r sush a good JUGGLER please rape me furiously!!!"
>"Wow I had no idea someone could river dance like that, please impregnate me and be my life partner!!"
>"omg where do u buy blizzaga pls ill pay 1000 gil so epik guys pls"''

>>36098098
This is a post with reason. I work 6 days a week, I'm just not hanging out in gyms and libraries like some 20 year old collegefag retard so therefor "going outside" is complete bullshit stock canned response.

>pls no dumb shit like "lose weight" or "go outside" or "join a book club"
>pls nothing that might work

>>36098206
typical cuck mindset

>>36098206
>giving women all of your attention
>not focusing on building yourself up
enjoy your 2 month relationships anon

File: 1482241929132.jpg (30KB, 480x507px) Image search: [Google]

30KB, 480x507px

>>36097389
>Go watch anime
>Find a character you really really like
>Search "[insert the character] dakimakura"
>Find someone selling it
>By it
>Wait for it to arrive
>There you go, just don't forget to wash your gf from time to time and take good care of her

you're on r9k
honestly don't even bother
you couldn't grow the balls if you tried

>>36098363
>>36098414
>bullshit replies that contribute nothing but to feed your ego so you can say you replied

stupid fucking dumbasses.

>>36098465
>your an r9k just like me so you get no gf xD xD

Are you really this fucking dumb? I already have balls and I'll use them to swoon your mother at the supermarket, after a healthy strict diet of pepinos and coconut water (complimenting my starting strength training) and disc golf skills beckon her vaginal juices like God's Deluge. Then I'll invite her back to my luxury penthouse to discuss Schopenhaur i'll impregnate her and abandon the child.

>>36097389
Get a dating app some girls want more than just dick

>>36098618
If you're so macho why do you need advice from a bunch of faggots? It's too bad you lack your internet confidence in real life.

>>36098618
Don't forget the activated almonds

>>36098661
Wow, you're not the DUMB fucking DROOLING retard I thought you were!

Too bad I don't read Schopenhaur ,and I injured my shoulder while LARPing back in 2008. But I'm a boss at SNK and I improvise Dark Wave at the local goth club every 2nd Tuesday of the month, except for in Fall because I have accordion lessons.

>>36098078
Well with an attitude like that no girls gonna wanna be with you anyway. He's right and your a dick. The only way an asshole who isn't willing to put forth any effort is gonna get a girl is to pay for one. You already know the answers. Jist fucking do the things you already know you scrum. And quit cussing people out on the internet when you ask for their advice.

>4evalone

>>36098987
What if I am an asshole and I put in a whole LOT of effort and I get a gf? Then what faggot? You're not some social psychologist and your retarded inferences based on make believe morality belong in an instagram portfolio, not in any real argument. You stupid fucking idiot.

>>36099110
/sage/ inference or experience?