FeelsBadMan, I need to get this off my chest.

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>be 6th grade me
>have very close friend group
>pretty much brothers
>they call my mom "mom"
>good old days
>dad lost job years ago and we're running out of money
>market crashes
>no jobs anywhere near home
>find out we're moving across the country
>decide to have best "last summer" with friends
>have best two months ever
>move day comes
>crying, saying goodbyes, usual moving shit
>get to my very best friend, Kris.
>we decide not to say goodbye because goodbyes mean we won't see each other.
>move away
>year passes, no time to visit home
>slowly losing touch with friends, but not Kris
>next year passes, still talking to Kris
>we're family at this point
>winter of sophomore year in high school
>Kris stops responding
>ohshit.jpeg
>get worried
>months pass, no contact
>finally hear back
>Tells me he's been busy getting things in order
>lol wut
>goes on to tell me he's been diagnosed with stomach cancer
>indescribable feeling
>need to visit now
>poorfag with no money for ticket
>tell him we haven't said goodbye yet so it isn't over
>time passes, finally get to visit
>can't get in contact
>in hometown but can't find Kris
>feels bad man
>try to get in touch before I have to leave
>nothing
>cry entire flight home
>ask him why he stopped talking
>told me he didn't want to be seen while being treated with chemo
>get frustrated
>tell him he wasted my money and time
>stop talking
>time passes
>occasional small conversation over Facebook
>get call one day
>old area code
>stomach sinks
>I know what the calls for
>pick up
>It's Kris' mom
>he died three days ago
>I never got to say goodbye
>tfw it's been years and I still struggle to get out of bed with the regret of never saying goodbye or telling Kris how much he meant. I've hated myself ever since and I don't think I'll ever recover.
>Goodbye Kris.