What is the most pathetic thing you've ever done?

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self fellatio desu

Stuck my sister's panties up my ass, shit it out and then masturbated with it on my face.

being alive

unoriginal post

>Have a 5 year stint of locking myself in my room and not talking to anyone besides my parents.
>Haven't seen daylight in years outside of taking out the garbage.
>Isolated in complete loneliness
>Basically begged a childhood friend who I had a falling out with to hang out with me.
>Apologize for being a piece of shit as a kid
>This begging goes on and off for months he doesn't reply once
>Went over to his house to talk to his mom and see if she could help convince him to be my friend.
>Eventually give up

I fucking want to die. Luckily I found a less cringy outlet down the road.

>>35946816
Be a scared skinny socially anxious kid through middle school and high school. I wish I could go back and shake myself and open my eyes and make moves on cute girls in class. Now I'm 22 still thinking about the underage girls I could have pounded :( still got 18 though!

>>35946816
Post nudes for attention.

My life is pretty much an endless cycle of pathetic inaction and inability to function

I haven't washed my clothes in two weeks because my dad told me to start washing my own clothes and I am afraid to ask how to use the washing machine again since he already explained it once but I forgot already and I don't want him to lose even more faith in his useless son

I let my dad have sex with me in exchange for financially supporting me.

>>35946925
That's only pathethic if you're male. For a woman, it's expected. What difference does it make if it's husband or father.

>>35946925
Post nudes so we can rate

Idly masturbating for hours without even intending to cum, just a way to pass time

I do that pretty often too so I can't really limit that to one time

>>35946816
I drank and swallowed a glass of my own piss

>>35947101
How did it taste?originally

>>35947132
just as bad as I thought it would, very bitter and puke inducing. I like the smell of it though, it's very erotic and turns me on. I wish a woman could piss on my body but even if I had a gf I wouldn't dare to ask

>>35946816
Told my entire school that I don't get erections from watching porn and I'm totally not into girls.

>>35946816
>only friend in junior high
>tells me his greatest secret after making me swear i wouldn't tell anyone
>i tell everyone
>he commits suicide

the secret was that he was suffering from domestic abuse and planned to run away from his house. he was also bullied in school.

>>35947267
what prompted you to do this?

>>35947277
>getting beat by his parents
haha what a faggotdon't feel bad bro he sounds like a queer

>>35947277
But why would you do this? Originally, of course.

Stayed in a relationship with a girl after I found out she was cheating.

It was more of a "I have no idea how to break up with someone so let me just try to ghost her" kind of relationship, so it ended up with her complaining I was distant and then breaking up because I'm not the same.

>>35947318
he was kind of annoying, but the real faggot of the story is me for not keeping a secret and gossiping.

>>35947335
immaturity. i thought the people i told this were my friends, when in reality i was just following them around. after i told them they started telling everyone despite my pleads.

>>35947293
My parents are extremely conservative and drilled the idea that I was a "pure" person and that having sexual thoughts was the greatest sin for a teenager.
They once found me watching vanilla hetero porn when I was 14 and proceeded to literally beat the shit out of me.

>>35946816
Use a cucumber as a dildo, eat the end to get to the thicker part... I was in the shower... My parents also came in to check on me because I had been in the shower for over 30 minutes...

>>35947504
sounds like you had it coming you hellish pervert

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I was using a public bathroom once and the guy in the stall next to me was taking a fucking awful smelling shit. Popped a hard-on from it and thought about jerking off right there.

>>35947537
Smell fetish or scat fetish?

Or just random perverted thing you did because you're a complete degenerate?

>>35946816
I have oneitis for this girl I hooked up with a few times and I stalk her twitter

>my friend has a pool
>go to my friend house to swim
>we are alone at his house
>passing by his sister room
>see panties on the floor
>pretend I have to go to bathroom to go back inside to sniff his sister panties
>does this multiple time
>I was 22 at the time

I cummed on a lab partner's cookies when no one was around. I guess she ate them as the cum seemed to be dry afterwards.

>>35947600
Both

At least I didn't fap

>>35946843
That ain't pathetic, that's impressive

I once sucked a dogs dick

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I watch slice of life anime

I've been caught watching such anime

My parents found my azusa daki

>>35947746
Greentext or I'm calling fake

i walked in on my girlfriend laying next to her ex bf
she denied it
I looked in the trashcan for a condom
I picked it up to see if there was jizz in it.

I have no idea why I did that. It was the most disgusting and pathetic thing I've ever done
I was crushed

I lit a homeless persons tent on fire and burned down all of his/her possessions and food when I was in middle school

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>be in middle school
>start to really like a girl
>don't know how to approach her, though
>so, for some reason, I thought that silently following her around is a good idea
>eventually she gets sick of it and tells me to stop doing it
>I don't stop
>after maybe a month, her brother shows up with her after school and beats the shit out of me
>never flirted with a girl again

>>35946816
Browsed 4chan instead of having a social life for 10 years.

>>35947728
Shit man, me too.

Not for men though, I'm not gay. If it was a cute girl I probably would've fapped, I don't have that kind of self control.

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>>35946816
Went on a paragraph-length rant on normiebook about how Hentai isn't just about people fapping to pixels. About how the grills made are made to be perfect and fix any flaws real women have

Consistently gave money to a dude I wasn't even all that into because he said he cared about me.

story behind image pls

I hesitated hugging a girl when she WANTED to hug me

>>35947867
>Consistently gave money to a dude I wasn't even all that into because he said he cared about me.
Are you a girl or a guy?

>>35946816
oh that's easy, I owned a Mazda once

Can't ask for a bigger piece of shit, well maybe a gm

>>35946816
>be sick
>runny nose, closed throat, difficult to breath, etc
>need to take a shit
>start pissing and shitting
>couldn't piss inside without touching the lid with my dick, decide to piss on the floor and clean it later
>first turd is out
>...
>fucking start choking on the smell
>gag reflex is sensitive because of disease, preventing me from breathing
>try to get away to have a breath
>slip on my own piss and fall down
>the smell of rotting corpses has already filled the bathroom
>in a hopeless state of trying to breathe through the mucus in my nose, the phlegm in my throat and controlling my gag reflex while being in physical pain because of the smell
>can't hold it any more, start puking
>also started shitting again
>vomiting uncontrollably, haven't breathed for over a minute, body is weak from illness, actually feel like i'm dying
>hands hopelessly flailing and slipping all over my vomit, shit and piss
>vomit smell makes things even worse
>can't move my hands any more
>lungs feel like they will explode
>everything goes dark
>i fucking die

...

But in all of my luck, this happened while my roomie was around, who ignored all the shit and vomit that covered me and performed CPR, reviving me.

No I didn't see my life all over again or any light. There was just a darkness.

>>35947929
A very original gayfag.

>>35947992
Lmao puking and shitting till you die. That's how I wanna go out.

Snorting crystal meth I found on the ground.

>>35947992
>also started shitting again
kek'd

sorry bro that sounds like hell but that part sure is funny

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Fapped into little girl panties I bought at a rummage sale.

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Back in high school I basically rejected/friendzoned a 10/10 girl who I was friends without realizing it because I was too stupid to notice that she had feelings for me.

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went 3 years without having sex. or any contact with women at all.

here's to year 4.

When I was 17, I drove this 16 year old girl that I was obsessed with to the mall so she could get fucked by her 25 year old boyfriend.
Also spent $400 on a girl in hopes of her taking me back, it didn't work. Instead she just used me and proceeded to hook up with a guy who already had a girlfriend.

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>>35948285
>When I was 17, I drove this 16 year old girl that I was obsessed with to the mall so she could get fucked by her 25 year old boyfriend.

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>>35948285
you know what to do orgno

>>35948285
Why not tell the police, isn't that statutory rape.

>>35948243
That feel. I'm almost in the exact same situation except I did get to make out and finger one girl in those 3 years. Plus I got a hug from another girl, but that's it. I practically feel like a virgin at this point.

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Followed weird orders from multiple older men online. Peeing into bottles on all fours and then drinking it, sticking bananas and marshmallows up my butt and then eating them, drawing on my entire body with markers and writing things, it's all there

>visited my online gf even though I knew she was cheating on me.

>>35948301
The second girl actually thought I was going to kill her and she eventually stopped meeting up with me since she was scared of how mentally unstable I was (and still am). I don't care about her anymore since she got knocked up by a married dude. Stupid bitch should have took me back, now she's a single mother.


>>35948300
I know, it's pathetic. I hate myself for being such a beta.

>>35948323
As stupid as it sounds, I don't believe in snitching. Yeah it is illegal though. After I drove her to the mall I don't think I did any favors for her again, that was kind of the nail in the coffin.

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>>35947770
Slice of life indeed.

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>>35948373
pretty cute anon don't feel bad

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Jerking off while sniffing my mom's panties while I fantasized about fucking her, cumming on her clothes, then hanging them back in her closet.

>>35948427
>woman time rapes you
>complains you're mentally unstable
women don't realize that emotionally this is reverse rape

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>>35948349

i feel like i can't connect with women at all because i fucking can't. i never have. i honestly wish i was gay.

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made a feabie and posted myself jerking off on /soc/ and linked that /soc/ post on her a few hours ago

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i was guarding my aunt and uncle's house for one month in summer and masturbated every day into my 14 yo cousin panties and bras

i'd do it again

I made a fake facebook account, searched for the girl I liked in school, found her, saved a photo of her. I just look at it from time to time and remember back when I had dreams.

From 1 to 10, how pathetic is this?

>>35947992
Ascend past this shithole, you were meant for something, anon.

>>35947992
Well greentexted, put me in screencap

>>35946922
Just put all your clothes in the machine, pour in half a capful of detergent, and run it on whatever the average setting

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>>35946816
>Be me
>1 AM
>Get really drunk with Whiskey
>Go to the nearest comfy public park with a lake and ducks
>The park is closed
>I jump the fence being drunk as fuck without killing myself
>Pick a stick
>Go running with the stick like a madman beating trees and shit with it
>See ducks sleeping
>Start chasing the ducks to bully them with the stick
>They fly to the lake
>I throw the stick at them in frustration but I fail
>I take out my pants
>I start shitting and pissing in the lake
>After that I went home and puked in front of my parents

>hanging out with my friend and acquaintances in my basement lair
>high as all fuck on ativan and amphetamine
>challenge my only real friend to a fight
>calling him all sorts of fucked up insults (mostly about his dead father)
>he's reluctant because were friends and I'm very intoxicated
>he's trying to talk me down, I throw a punch and catch his jaw
>he proceeds to beat the living fuck out of me, not that I really feel it
>after not even 5 minutes of scrapping, I'm on the floor curled up
>blackout
>wake up 10 hours later, my face is covered in bruises, right eye swelled shut, mouth still full of blood
>laying in a pool of my own bloody vomit
>spend the next week trying to piece together what happened and reconcile with friend
That's how I lost the only person to care about me that wasn't related to me. It still hurts desu

>>35949239
This sounds really fun, if we had a closed comfy park I would do that

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>>35949239
>Start chasing the ducks to bully them with the stick
it's not fair I'm so unhappy and those fucking ducks are just chillin

>>35947992
I sure hope you treated your roomie to dinner or something because it takes a real champion to dig through shit and vomit just to revive someone.

>>35949602
https://youtu.be/xlEfjWxmll0

>>35946816
I posted half a picture of my face (basically just my eyes). This guy said I looked cute and told me to post more so I did. He kept saying how pretty I was and how he wanted to fuck me. I'm not even gay but the attention made me feel nice.

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>>35949239
Holy shit kek

Short of puking in front of your parents and shitting in the lake, that sounds like a really fun night

I've came in my ass, fingered myself using cum as lube and came a second time, this time swallowing everything

Dance at anime dance party full od normies and weebs while being bald.

>>35947524
I like to sit in the shower for hours
Am I a bad person

Tried to go on nofap to turn myself straight and to help fix my life.

Ended up getting consumed by lust and fucking my boipussy for an hour straight.

>>35948206
hey miles what up

>>35950965
how long did you last? orgno

>>35951125
About 3 days, then I kept getting raging boners and an overwhelming urge to give up.

Fucked a fat chick

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>>35946816
Be obsessed and in love over a boy I never met who's just a man whore who wants nothing to do with me

>>35947770
>Parents found the daki

I know this feel all too well.

>>35949517
Why the fuck would you do that? You sound like a real asshole.

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Move to another Country in Europe.

>>35946816
I stayed up for 48 hours trying to force a meme that never caught on

>>35949517
That's the thing no one dumps a good friend because they fuck up once. You're just a piece of shit which was proven in your own story.

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>>35951039
I'm drunk and high and watching leotard videos. I should just kill myself. I have like 100mg of xanax I should take it all and drink all the alcohol I have.

>>35946816
Bought two tickets to a concert months away thinking I'd make a friend I could go with in those months
Ended up selling the extra ticket and went on my own

I ones took a picture of a cute girl playing her 3DS on the bus. Thing is I had my flash on. The older lady who was talking to her gave me the most disgusted look. I got off 3 stop early out of shame.

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>>35952484
don't die, i'll miss you

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>>35952648
I'm a disgusting pedophile drug addict bedwetting retard with a shitty education and various mental issues. I have no friends in real life and people only like me because they feel bad for how pathetic I am. I deserve to suffer when I die. I hope I'm horribly scared when I do attempt to kill myself, I deserve no less. I shouldn't even be alive. I'm a waste of space and money and the world is better off without me.

>>35952515
In high school I had my parents buy two tickets to a Springsteen concert for me because I told them I had a date to bring

The girl I asked to go with me declined so I just sat next to an empty seat

i've fucked my best friend's wife

>>35949239
When I first started drinking I got shitfaced and jumped the fence at a private golf course and I jerked off on the 18th green and then took a shit in the bunker on 17th before passing out. Luckily the sprinklers went off and woke me up before the groundskeepers got there or I would have been arrested

I went to the hospital after shoving a battery up my butt and had sex with a black guy while I was drunk, even though I'm a straight white cis male.

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>>35946816
Drank my own piss out of a pissbottle so I could re-use it and not have to leave the room because my mom had friends over.

>>35953134

Why didn't you just pour it out the window?

>>35947770
>My parents found my azusa daki
Brutal.

>>35946816
took creepshots of a busty qt I saw in starbucks

>>35951309
AWWW OMG IT'S A GIRL SHE'S SOOOO CUTE I'LL MAKE YOU SMILE PRINCESS WATCH THIS

*does a cartwheel*

CHEER UP GIRL, THINGS WILL WORK OUT. LEAVE /R9K/ BECAUSE IT REALLY IS A SHITHOLE AND IT WILL ONLY HURT YOU. <3

>>35946816
Try to make friends on an anonymous imageboard

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>>35952998
Why are you telling us this? Do you like the attention?

>>35946816
I haven't really done much of anything. My entire life I've just been an outside observer not an active agent.

>>35953343
Because I'm anxious and don't know what else to do.

>>35953247
I appreciate the uniqueness, energy, and cohesiveness of this satirical post.

>>35953425
Thanks.

More people on 4chan ought to give positive feedback, unless you pull off something really cool you only get attention for pissing people off.

>>35953422
it's not like you don't have online friends and a bf

are they not enough for you? even the last anon said he would miss you

Thinking back, taking part in all the printer raids of the yesteryears. Some of the printers that were open and unprotected could put out some really expensive memes.
My only regret really is that I didn't have the gull to print out goatse like I originally planned to. I wussed out and settled for pedobear. It was a pathetic, cowardly move. I could have printed out the most expensive goatse picture by proxy, but I didn't.

>>35953460
>unless you pull off something really cool you only get attention for pissing people off.
I think I learned, and then forgot that, about 4chan years ago, but I didn't forget how it made me permanently lose partial interest in this site.
Like, it's not a place to come and communicate and share in all sorts of free-flowing ways, it's just a place to come and watch the same set-up and reaction, time after time.
:/

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>>35953601
>:/
Ebin emotes family man

>>35953601
Yeah. The fast boards in particular get very formulaic. The same rage and bait for years.

It's addicting, but good content and new information are so rare. I've wanted to leave for about three years now and I'm still here pretty regularly.

>>35946925
would you continue the story? please

Sucked off a guy who used to bully me. I did enjoy it at the time, he was average but thick.

Only cock I've sucked in my life.

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>in mall with friends
>friend says she needs a new bra
>get an idea from anime
>grab her breasts in the middle of the mall
>"Hehe have your breasts got bigger???"
>she pushes me away and screams

At least I'm a girl too so it wasn't like I was a guy doing this.

>>35953824
>At least I'm a girl too
You have a cock though

>>35946843
Did you use the Wall technique or the Croutching technique?

>>35953824
What the fuck did you think would happen, Anon

>>35948243
>3 years

Try 19, all my life so far, haven't even held a hand or spoke to any outside my family

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>>35953247
If I was a girl I wouldn't be posting here anon.
But I also appreciate the effort

>>35953969
Unconditionally expecting people to reciprocate my beliefs and morals. I cant even tell you how many times this was wrong. People are just fucking faggots at the end of the day, you think this way nothing will surprise you. This is good advice btw.

>>35948243
8 years here you fucking babby, looking at a 9th soon ha ha fuckign kill me

>>35946890
If it makes you feel any better, there are others in your same boat and fuck, none of us had a say in the matter.

Lie on the floor near two girls while being to autistic to join them in the threeway they wanted to have with me, just got up and left while thinking and feeling like they would not want me, even after they told me to get over there and have sex with them

That was the last time I interacted with the opposite sex, 9 years ago

>>35953824
Don't think this played out right, hilarity should have ensued. She didn't react right so definitely her fault. Maybe you should have been more invasively aggressive.

I do this frequently and everybody laughs... Except for one uptight prude in highschool who overreacted like a freak, I've got a splendid groping track record.

I'm a guy so it should be doubly ridiculous when you do it. I'd say practice three times in a row preceding ellipses. >ADVICE!!

>>35955033
>middle of the mall
HMMM maybe the context has something to do with it. Really makes your noggin go a joggin.

>>35946816
I'm taking anti androgens for hair loss.

I don't think it should be pathetic but it is.

no one knows.

>>35955089
Not pathetic. I knew a bunch of guys in college who were losing their hair. Blame society.

>>35953790
did he cum in your mouth?

>>35955114
going from teenage chad to 20 yo baldcel isn't fun. In fact, it made me depressed and I want to die

fall in love once
She even not got a fuck about me....
And I bought gifts for her many times.

>>35955302
go away indian scum

I regularly pretend to be a young girl on omegle just for the attention.

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>>35955425
Stories? This is one of my fetishes.

>>35955191
So fucking what. At least you aren't trapped. You have options. Rock that shaved head.

>>35948240
this angers me because I did the same thing and just realized i did it because of this post

>>35948285
i did the same thing but i was broke so $125 was the most i spent on that slut

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>>35946816
>Playing Counterstrike with best friend (we're both underaged).
>I get mauled largely because he gets the comfy chair and a controller that isn't broken whilst I have to use a deck chair and a crappy third party.
>I'm visibly irate.
>"I won fair and square anon!"
>"N-no, that was unfair and circle!!"

>>35948783
like 2 or 3 it's not that bad

>>35955562
You don't know shit. You wouldn't want to bald while very young.

This is the worst thing ever. I don't recognize myself in the mirror. Girls stopped interacting with me and old friends look at me with pity like I dropped out of college or something.

Hair is everything. Do anything to keep it if you have subhuman hair genetics like me (ie at least one grandpa bald).

>>35955159
He cummed on my face.

>>35950357
how the hell do you come in your own ass?

>>35952351
can you show us the meme? im sure somebody wants to help it catch on ironically

>>35955757
Get a wig then, IDC. Just seems that your limited life experiences are gravitating you toward feeling something that a ton of other young men are experiencing is something that warrants dying. Try wasting your entire fucking life to not be able to accomplish anything. Balding included in the package.

>>35953067
you're just shitty then

>>35946816
Browsed /r9k/ after the normalfags took over. You all disgust me and I can't wait to make you degenerates die slowly.

>>35948373
How are you today, b?

>>35955889
There are other chans out there where the original base moved off to. Couldn't tell you where. Blame Moot and that one guy for trying to make things Reddit 2.0.

>>35946816
>go to shitty all boys catholic school
>they force us to keep our hair short
>i wanna be a faggot so bad so I decide to grow my hair
>school gets pissed off and threatens to suspend me if I come back with it long
>parents are pissed off with me
>buy fucktons of water bottles, lock myself in my room for 3 days, don't eat and only drink water
>come outside when everybody is asleep to pee/shit

It was pretty pathetic desu

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>>35955937
I am very sleepy

I sometimes order food and tip the delivery guy $20-$30 because I'm a piece of shit that wants to feel like i'm worth something.

I am not roleplaying as a rich philanthropist, but it's kinda affordable. I make about 48k a year.

>>35955850
You're a sad faggot.

Hair is necessary to live life as a young man and to be accepted by your peers.

In the social media era where muh nice pic is everything, balding is a social death sentence.

Balding guys are just freaks. No bald role models except aging 50 yo freaks like diesel and statham.

Life is shit without hair. Millionaires with perfect lives had to get hair transplants to find some comfort. Look at wayne rooney and elon musk and countless stars.

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>>35946909
I feel your pain, I was a moralsfag who only wanted to take a girls virginity, and stay with her for life. I finally did get a girl and take her virginity, but she left me a few weeks later. I was emotionally destroyed and experienced ego death not long after. Haven't had sex since.

>>35946896
Damn, i feel like you should at least get a (you)

Nothing turns away normies more than people who are isolated. I think the best way to beat isolation is to fake being a normie somehow. It's called social proof. We're fucked, sorry anon.

>>35946922
what the other anon said, but make sure to wash everything cold is how i do it. idk that much either. Ive never washed it on hot once in fear of running colors

>>35956244
I say you still give too much of a shit. The fact that you're trying to pander to what normies MIGHT think about you tells me everything.

>>35953824
I've actually seen this in another thread

>>35956448
you don't understand because you're socially inept.

looking at least normal wins you social connections which ultimately provide you networks, a job, career advancement and success

Balding is like effortlessly looking like a beta robot. automatically a loser.

Prove me wrong without using middle aged successful bald men. times have changed. bald means robot forever. very sad.

>>35947746
I wanked one off once. Closest I've even come to sex.

>>35956643
When you encounter actual suffering and pain, you'll know how petty this shit is. At your age I didn't have any friends. I still don't. It's because of where I live. Count your blessings and stop feeling sorry for yourself. Some of us aren't so fortunate.

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I got black out drunk and piss everywhere in my apt. Not once.

>>35956767
yeah boy, tell a dying cancer patient about your 'problems'. You'll know how petty you are.

This is your reasoning.

>>35946816
Called a girl who was cheating on me a cunt by email. But the thing is, for some reason I wanted her to think I was like that, i.e. if it wasn't so detestable and beta, I wouldn't have done it.

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>acquire girls number
>says shes free on the weekend
>weekend comes and pussy out making plans
>stay home and drink alone

Pretty much sums up my current situation

>>35946922
Just look at the knobs for a minute you fucking retard. It's not complicated. There's usually instructions on the underside of the lid.

>>35946816
I sucked my own dick, i'm not sure if it's pathetic or an achievement.

>>35958185
I'm pretty sure that's an achievement.

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>>35946816
Posted in a few /soc/ rate threads out of insecurity.

On the plus side, even though it's even worse, the ratings were the first compliments I'd ever had from someone other than family and helped me turn my self-image around.

>>35946922

OK Anon. It's not hard, but you need to give it a shot.

All washing machines use detergent (which comes in liquid or powder form) and water. There are also settings for how dirty the clothes are, and the quantity.

First, the water is provided from the washing machine. Just push/pull the appropriate dial/button at the right setting (I'll talk about settings in a bit). Google if you need help.

The detergent is pretty straightforward too. Read directions on the bottle if it's a liquid, or the box if it's a solid. Dump an appropriate amount in. Sometimes in some washing machines it goes into a specific "detergent" area, so check for that.

The quantity of the clothes is the easiest part to figure out. If it's a lot of clothes you hit the "large" option (or equivalent. Use your brain)

The options for how to wash vary so much, and have a lot of different options. Just pick medium time and heat, or automatic. Doesn't matter /too/ much.

For white clothes you can use bleach. Not exactly /required/ though. It's fine if you don't.

Good luck, anon.

>>35958185
Quite a bit of both.

>>35953942
bed and chair
>bed
pull legs up suck dicc
>chair
bend back and suck the dicc

my most shameful moment was going to an amusement park with a friend and remembering I was afraid of rollercoasters. still feel guilty about ruining his time, he didn't get to go on any rides

>>35946816
Cried in front of a woman I just fucked

>>35960013
please storytiem?