the r9k civil war

>>35937302
bots hit rock bottom, normies did not experience such

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>>35937302
Fucking normies plague this board

>>35938179
65 points. Cool test.

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>almost 30
>living with family
>still on probation but working a comfy office job where I chat with my coworkers and like it
>sometimes alienate coworkers with comments, like saying I have no use for women (without saying that it's because I'm gay) or that they knew what they were doing at the time the Treaty of Versailles was signed and that another war was inevitable
>living in a basement without paying rent, and have to walk through my uncle's bedroom to use the toilet
>otherwise I piss in bottles, which I do almost every night to not disturb his sleep
>moving into my own apartment (without roommates) in a few weeks
>going to pay half my paycheque in rent
>worth it because I will have total privacy and solitude to be a part-time NEET
>working, making enough to eat well and be independent very soon

Do I belong here?

No niggers
No negresses
No skin tone darker than a starbucks Frappuccino
No under 18 boybutt fuckmeat
No people with jobs
No people in skewl
No associated faggotry
And no jews or their shillbots

AND NO GF

>>35939219
Despite the above, I think I'm charismatic enough to not get fired anyway. I like all my coworkers and I'm 90% sure they all like me. I've just sort of outed myself as being a bit off the cuff, but overall we chat and crack jokes for 8 hours a day so it feels pretty normal.

>>35939219

There's no such thing as a part time NEET!!! Youre not even the first person to use the term I've seen today, what the fuck! You can stay but don't even pretend you are anything but a mediocre normie.

>>35938179
got 18 dont know how but i fee like i got a 25 to be all honesty

>>35939371
sorry trying to fix spelling errors but captcha is being a unoriginal fag

>>35938179
Totaled up to slightly strange, sounds about right

>>35937302
in my opinion, you must be:

>boring

>ugly, or at least below average

>fat, short, or lanky

>awkward/anti social

>kissless virgin, of course

>never have been in a romantic relationship

>no friends in real life

>unemployed, or have a job with shit pay

bonus if you were raised by a single mother, still live with your parents, or were bullied/ignored as a child.

niggers can be robots. females, however, cannot. the female equivalents of robots usually use tumblr instead and should stay there.

>>35938179

> tfw 134 and easily could have been more

>>35939645
> 134 guy here

sometimesi feel like you guys are actually being ironic. you cant seriously be all of these things can you? jesus christ

>>35939261
If you know how dark a starbucks frappuccino is you aren't a robot.

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>>35937302
I'm so fucking disliked I can't even come on here because I'm a normie for having a job and a car. Where the fuck am I supposed to go you goddamned elitists. My friends don't like me my family doesn't like me, girls don't like me and you guys don't like me. Where do I go?

>>35937302
in the order of the op

not necessarily

no

no

if you have had sex you are not a robot

there is no such thing as a female robot

no, not necessarily

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>Not a virgin
>Not single
>Has a decent amount (3+) of actual friends
>Goes out most weekends

Those are the non-meme, non-hyperbole normie requirements.

If you fulfill any of the listed criteria, you need to L E A V E

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>>35938179
tfw 114

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>>35937302
finally someone speaks out. Im fucking tired of this shit get the fuck off /b/ normies
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

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alright so this board got me thinking if im a normie so let me display who i am

>tall and fat
>15 but been browsing 4chan since 6th grade so that's a gray area
>growing a shitty neckbeard
>literally not attractive at all to the point where the only time a grill had a crush on me was like 1st grade
>only have 2 friends I talk to on a normal basis
>stays in pretty much all the time playing on my pc
>still a virgin
>only dated like 3 girls, one was serious and the other two were for jokes
>got nudes out of one tho
>had my first actual kiss in late elementary
>pretty boring if you don't know anything about gaming or pc culture
>asocial
>likes anime to an extent
>jekrs off to hentai, loli, and some other shit that isn't human based like SFM
>only good thing about me is i somehow have been able to maintain a 4.0 gpa in school

If you are in college you are at least a failed normie

>>35937302
>does having a job disqualify you from robothood?
probably not, no; memes notwithstanding if you're Elon Musk or any faint imitation thereof you're not one, though

>what about living on your own?
no

having friends?
no but you know a normie when you see one I'd say to this one

virginity?
yes, sexhavers are not robots

being a woman?
yes, here are no fembots

having money?
no

>>35941933
GET OUT
SAVE YOURSELF

>>35941933
>>35942000
2xkek'd
don't listen to trips asshole you're here forever
enjoy the ride

>>35942014
finally someone supports my bad decisions in life

Any of the following words automatically make you a normalfag:
>Normie
Its normalfag, normie makes the word sound cute, which in turn makes it an acceptable thing for normalfags to joke about on facebook
>REEEEE
It was funny the first couple of times
>Pepe
Sorry guys but it has been compromised, if you don't know who sadfrog is then you are a newfag and too young to be on this site

The switch from normie to normalfag and the switch from sadfrog to pepe was essentially what killed this board

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>>35937302

i'm a virgin NEET who hasn't had an irl friend in 9 years and only 1 internet friend who probably doesn't give much of a shit about me

oh and im poor (goes with the NEETdo thing)

do i qualify or am i a failed normie

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>>35937302
>Jobs can be shit so no
>Living on your own sounds like it could be expensive/awful or comfy/glorious
>Friends can be close soul mates or toxic bitchy cunts
None of the above therefore affect robothood

>Virginity
>Gender
>Wealth
This is where it's at, robots must be virgin and male but being rich is a tricky one...

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>>35942031
Better decisions are possible and have arguments. They're just less likely to occur, for the kind of people who think about them for too long, than the other permutations. This is what I've seen of the world.
I was going to give you some sort of advice but I don't know shit about anything.
Anxiety is faggotry, perpetual death.

Can we get past the normie/robot dichotomy?

It's a spectrum. Like autism.

i don't think that any one standard on its own can qualify or disqualify someone to "belong" on the board; folk can bicker all they want and commit the no true robot fallacy back and forth

i'd rather say that folk consciously bragging about their measures of success, or being so oblivious that they don't realize their bragging don't really belong here

i understand the desire to have a sort of homogenous society to belong to tho

>>35941933
i'm not gonna tell you to remove yourself from 4chan entirely, but please do take everything you see here with a gigantic boulder of salt. please don't develop an identity based on this place, please don't develop a worldview or ideology primarily based upon material seen here

i mean, except for underageb& and everything

>>35938179
Several of these thing disqualify you from being a robot instantly
According to this i can be a wizard if i have had multiple romantic partners and sex

>>35937536
Underated post.

I've hit rock bottom before. I've seen the depths of hell and I've experienced true suffering. Luckily I have a job coming soon and with the money, I'll try doing normie stuff and such. But that time I saw hell, It will effect me forever even until I have children and die. I'm a broken man!

>>35937302
>what constitutes a normie?
truly content with who he is and isn't insecure about it.

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>>35942085
You're not technically wrong, the worst kind of wrong... but, because I'm an autistic asshole, achkshualorigamy
it's very unlikely you could check off those boxes and not have to have so many points from the things that facilitated the romantic partners/sex that you could qualify as anything but Normalfag plus; again, it's not mathematically conclusive but I just can't imagine the person you're describing

>>35942081
its ok, despite being a retard on here I'm actually well educated but that's mainly to help out my single mom

>>35938179
Slightly strange bordering on cyborg. Sounds about right.
>tfw still not full normie

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>>35939871
>you cant possibly be a pathetic loser on a board full of pathetic losers, can you?

mfw

also leave my board fucking normie

>>35939219
Gays cannot be robots. You have had sex with over 100 men already.

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>outcasts of society are rejected here for not being enough of an outcasts

life is hell

>>35938179
C Y B O R G

missed out on a lot of the mental and social points

>>35942142
sick m8, just do the best you can out there

i would say that if those 2 friends you've got are worth anything, allow them to drag you out to social functions; i would have turned out way worse than i am had luck not bestowed a few good lads onto me. sure as shit didn't want to hang, especially around folk i didn't know or in large groups. still, these friends dragged my ass out there, cajoling and even coercing me

and boy, im so grateful that they did. i'm a bit fucked, but i coulda been mighty fucked instead

mite wanna take care of the neckbeard, i was a fukken autist that didn't figure out how to shave properly until like 18 so i had some nasty trash-fuzz sometimes. makes me shudder now

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I'm not a normie, nor am I a robot, I'm a freak!

>>35937302
You must be:

>White

>Poor or working class. Middle classes are allowed sometimes if they are ugly enough.

>A virgin

>Some combination of stupid/ugly/short or fat.

>Few or no friends.

>Must have some form of mental illness.

>>35939645
>boring
Good god no, you lame motherfuckers have ruined this board's culture.

>>35939261
Agreed but no whites either, whites aren't robots

>>35942258
there is no place for us

you either have to have everything, or have nothing.

the guys in the middle are the true lonely ones

>>35942279
fuck off
go cash in your oppresion points, shitskin

Lots of lifestyles can be robot but the one thing which isn't debatable is that anyone who has had sex which they didn't pay for is not a robot. If you're socially adept enough to get laid you aren't a robot, period.

>>35938179
Wizard Apprentice.

The bonus round really hurt my low score.

>>35942297
no you fuck off normalfag not even a shitskin
playing as a whitey is easy mode

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>>35938179
28 points here.
I could be a wizard, but the "Having an attractive face* ruins it,

>>35942323
real easy being blamed for crimes I or my father or my grandfather or my greatgrandfather did not commit

>>35942524
or even greatgreatgrandfather.

if you want someone with white skin to blame for slavery in America, blame the English. I'm Norwegian. so you can fuck the hell off. my family had nothing to do with it.

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>>35942278
>/r9k/
>culture

faggots like you don't exactly make this board look all that great either.

Mods are sleeping, all I see is blacked and cuck threads?

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>>35938179
>53
I'm fucked
organelle

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>>35942565
I'm Dutch, English and Norwegian but only the Dutch cunts were in America during slave times, how am I looking in the Oppression/Privilege Olympics?
I'm a 27 year old NEET who takes care of mummy so I can live rent free, donates sperm for pocket/vidya money and uses coupons at Wendy's for now plain tendies since they got rid of my spicy nuggies. I consider suicide 150 times a day, if it informs my standing at all.
/blog
>tfw basking in white privilege

>>35942264
im these things but not virgin

>>35938179
I got 134-138 on this test last time I took it. I definitely don't consider myself successful

>REE NORMIE XD

r9k was never about hating normies, it was about feels and the hope that tfw no gf might change one day

>>35940233

threads like this and "tell me about her" used to be the norm, then wizardchan decided that r9k had to be the exact same thing

>>35943073
Just retook it. 136.

Let me get the real list going for what it means to be a true robot.

>Virgin.
>No friends.
>Never had a gf.
>Not a fag.
>Don't go to any kind of educational center.
>Still living with parents.
>No job.
>Loves anime.
>Believe we made the right choice with our president.
And the most important of all:
>NOT A WOMEN.

>>35942299
I lost my virginity in my teens. I'm still a robot lol

There are plenty of sex machines. You could practically ask any girl to be your practice gf, and she'd probably accept.
If you're alone or a virgin, you CANNOT be a robot.

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>Virgin
>Socially awkard or autistic
>Not a woman
>Never had a gf
>not have chad-tier looks
>No friends, or at least only have 1 or 2 non-normalfag friends
>Been bullied at school

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>>35938179
32
almost feels good to belong

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>>35937302
>mfw i never had a facebook or related shit ever

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>be low rank military
>1-2 half friends I see online about once every other week
>KHV
>Hiv+
>never had gf
>have that blank look so can't look people in face or else they think I'm mad at them

Can I stay??

>>35938179

101, I guess I'll see you fags later lmao

>>35938179
Score of 68, so I'm a cyborg. I have a job and rent a place, but have no friends and am khv.

>>35944131
>>KHV
>>Hiv+

how? are you a heroine addict?

>>35937302
bots together strong

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>>35937302
Listen up faggots, this is the easiest and most simple way to determine normiehood

>sizeable amount of friends
>gf above a 4/10
>not a NEET

If you meet at least 2 of these criteria you are normie scum

>>35938179
Your test is idiotic.

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>>35944218
this seems like a good formula

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>>35944195
Nope never did any drugs that could cause transmission 21m ATM been hiv+ since 12-13yo

>>35944218
>>gf above a 4/10

If anyone's ever had a gf and/or is not a virgin, they're a confirmed normie.

>>35944218
having a gf in general, not being a NEET, being homosexual, not being a virgin and/or being female makes you a normie no matter what. Not being any of these things makes you a robot.

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>>35937302
A robot is a dysfunctional person who does not fit into or strongly identify with society.

A normie is a relatively health individual who lives a relatively standard lifestyle (i.e. Not a NEET, has a significant other, has friends, goes outside, isn't extraordinarily weird.)

You can have a job, live on your own, have friends, not be a virgin, be a woman, and have money and still be a robot. Each factor makes it more difficult to be a robot and having more just means you have to be extra dysfunctional to claim the title, but it is obtainable nonetheless, not that anyone should actually strive for it.

Us robots are a shitty demographic. All we have is each other, and we're a toxic group of autism, self-loathing, depression, and anxiety. Try to go easy on anyone who wants to identify with the group, chances are their life is pretty shit if they are coming to us for community.

>>35944131
absolute kek
How'd you manage that?

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>>35944257
pretty much the only common requirement for robothood is to be a virgin and male

>>35937302

when HEAVEN IDs were a thing, i had one.

thats all that needs to be said, i think.

My opinion is that if you care you are doing everything in your life wrong. If you actually want to be a robot by most people's definition then you're some kind of sick masochist.

>>35944270
I wish you could live a day in my life. Having a gf doesn't make your psychological and physical problems go away. In fact it causes you to fight to the death with them in order to keep her. Living the neet life and doing nothing is pretty hard. Keeping a job when you have cerebral palsy, bi polar, adhd, insomnia, and multiple other things fucking with you is life on the highest difficulty setting. Adding a gf to the mix fucks things up more. I wouldn't self identify as a robot, but I've lived that life before and I can tell you this is a thousand times harder.

>>35937536
I think this is why I still lurk here.
I was at rock bottom during college. Could go weeks without saying a word to anyone. Room and one side of my bed was completely covered in trash and food. Just had one friend that I knew from high school.

But now I'm getting paid decent money working with people with special needs. It was a bit weird at the start when parents were telling me how their kids rooms were a complete mess, don't shower, don't go out, while rolling their eyes when I was going through the same shit myself.

But I love my job now. I'm getting paid to take people out to eat, watch movies, go bowling, etc.

Still live at home for now but have a small circle of friends from high school that I see routinely.

Not sure if I'm still a robot.

>>35944348
thanks faggot
unironically decent contribution
no grills allowed at all

>>35938179

64, looks like I'm a cyborg then.

>>35938179
22 Welp, looks like there is no hope for me guise.

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I don't care if you're NEET
I don't care if you have 0 friends.

If you'd had sex and it wasn't from a prostitute, you are, by definition, NOT A ROBOT.

End of story.

>>35944565
I just want to say one more thing. What truly separates me from a robot is the lack of a defeatist attitude. Coming here reminds me of what I once was and easily could be if I stopped trying.

>>35944245
This shit ain't real. Military tests for that and wouldn't take you if your were pozzed

>>35937302
If you have friends; you are a normie.
If you have a gf; you are a normie.
If you are a woman; you are a normie.
Fembots do NOT exist. You are NOT a robot if you are a normie.

>>35937302
Nothing! You just gotta think like a normie. It's inside you

>>35941933
>15
>2 regular friends
>by the age of 15 already had 3 gfs one of which was serious
>kissed
>Got nudes

You fucking delusional underage fatass retard, get the fuck out.

If you're capable of having conversations on this board you are a normie.