/britfeel/

first for thread won't survive the night

>>35817280
2nd for South Africa being the best Africa

>>35817248
getting into the best britfeel hours now

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>>35817290
That's where you're wrong, lad

>>35817333
Nightly reminder

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Dingo

>>35817333
>>35817362
My best is how /pol/ jerk off so hard to Rhodesia, but then complain about civic nationalism and how civic nationalists are cunts all the while ignoring the fact that Rhodesia was a civic national country that was totally against Apartheid and segregation as laws.

Go to bed, lads.

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>>35817423
I'm not from /pol/ so you can shove it up your arse, lad

>tfw actually enjoying Iron Fist

Fight scenes are ass but I'm treating this like a cheesy kung fu show and it's pretty fun, it helps like I really liked Madam Gao from Daredevil though, I also like Harold and Ward's characters a fair bit, wish Danny wasn't so crappy at times, sometimes hard as nails other times like a dog with its head trapped in a crisp packet.

>>35817440
cant. im finishing a shit law essay. genuinely cant wait to finish uni. i hate it.

>>35817440
just 10 more minutes then i'll go to bed

>>35817469
>I'm not from /pol/
Never said you were. Although I do have my doubts about that now.

>>35817198

Same lad, I miss the 2015 britfeel days when I was on bennies and dreaded every appointment, but came back here to greentext how it went

I posted about getting a van driving job finally in April 2015, I'm still doing that same job now.

>>35817440
Going to play Wipeout until 7am then sleep until 10am then get up for work

>>35817474
I was watching it earlier in the week and I've given up at this point. Madam Gao was a good character but I disliked her after she knocks the iron fist across a room with the palm of her hand. Harold was good until he fucking died Ward has become bitchy
>>35817440
I will when I finish watching my film

>>35817248

>Go onto desuarchive
>Filter /r9k/ only
>Search 'lethal dose of morphine'

"Searching for posts that contain 'lethal dose of morphine'. 1666 results found."

Jesus Christ.

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>>35817515
It was implied from your end, lad.

>tfw the desire to wear short shorts and shoot blacks intensifies

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>>35817248
Post waifus lads. Still playing ME:A. I'm going to romance Vetra. But Saber's still my waifu.

>>35817333
Say what you want about the Rhodies, but them lads had some top tier choice in firearms tbqh. I've always wanted a FAL. I've also always wanted to become a soldier of fortune in africa, but very much doubt I'll end up doing it, due the the obvious reasons.

Anyone know how to stop youtube from putting the "Recommended for you" videos in the sidebar? They're always unrelated and they stop me from jumping between videos I do want to watch.

>>35817532
This is why I'm trying to just lower my standards with it and see it as a cheesy as fuck show, going with all the silliness in it and embracing it, I'm about half way through episode 10 where it's pretty much reveal upon reveal of lol you can't trust these people now and now you can't trust these people :^)

>>35817565
https://youtu.be/8M8rt5Sfk2E

>>35817248
>driving test tomorrow
>mum cooks roast for mothers day
>i ate most of the vegetables
>driving test super early in the morning
>im gas attacking my self with my own farts

fucksake

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>>35817582
I think I'm going to get comfy and watch some Serial Experiments Lain, how many episodes is a good amount?

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>>35817582
Becoming a soldier of fortune would be fun but I don't want to get malaria. Or shot.

>>35817582
I'm more bothered by the though of going to Africa than risking my life. Shit-tier continent.

>>35817622
Used to watch this episode all the time, it's the one where Homer doesn't go to church so he gets to lie in and have the morning home alone. Shit was comfy.

if i ever threw a party. would any of you lads come to it?

>>35817659

Depends how far you were

If stoners are going to be in attendance, no.

>>35817659
If you were an easy train ride away and you weren't going to bum or stab me then maybe.

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>>35817582
>tfw not enough booze to give me a buzz in the house

>>35817676
>Depends how far you were

north west england

>If stoners are going to be in attendance, no.

i dont know about that. i personally only drink. how come you hate stoners?

>>35817648
However many it takes for you to drift into that pleasant state of tiredness where the suicidal thoughts aren't cognizant enough to keep you awake.

>>35817649
>>35817657
I think I'd be more annoyed at the lack of utilities than afraid of being shot and killed. Obviously the worst fear is of being incapacitated or captured/tortured. Being shot and instantly killed in the middle of a fire fight wouldn't be a bad way to go, but being shot in the leg, and then getting gangrene or catching malaria and dying slowly would be a fucking piss take.

Fuck dying slowly.

>>35817565
Just play Resident Evil 5.

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>>35817248
Nightshift edition

Oh, it's great being black in a white neighborhood

>White boys wont DARE start a fight with you

"intimidates whites boy*

>You get to fuck EVERY white girl whitin a one mile radius with your beautiful black...

*cuts to interracial sex scene*

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tyhmlS-CMsQ

>>35817657
yeah i loved it as well. everytime i hear short shorts i think of it.
same as everytime i hear that song macho man i always think of https://youtu.be/wOsWfzzvlkU

>>35817717

They are all universal cunts, the worst tier of normalfag

>>35817727
Heard the AI on the darkie side kick is shite

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>>35817582
planned an early night but decided to spend the night trying to get catto and doggo to be chums.got to the stage where catto stands hissing for a bit before legging it upstairs. he just ran and hissed from under the chair yesterday.we're making progress.
bedtime now me thinks.

>>35817838
They had to make it realistic, lad.

>>35817759
I'm looking forward to this release, can see there'll be true banter

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>>35817937
>They had to make it realistic, lad.
Nice joke, lad. Made me chuckle

>tfw OSW just uploaded a new episode at 1am ffs.

>trying to figure out how long I've been on 4chan
>find a post I made over 6 years ago
>Also lurked for years before starting to post

Fuck sake I'm never going to leave at this point.

>>35818223
I remember being here for the The Old Republic release and the shitposting on /v/ ensued. That was 6 years ago, I'm 19 so pretty much all of my teenage years has been on 4chan. Bit sad.

>>35818223
>Also lurked for years before starting to post
Why? Seems a bit excessive.

>>35818264
ive only been coming on 4chan for about a year. feel like a proper baby.

im 22, nearly 23.

used to just go on /adv/ but got bored of it.

>>35818358
>/adv/
Shit board lad. I was 13 when I started going on /v/. I remember going on /b/ a lot before that which I think is where most people start with 4chan then you grow out of your edgy phase and move to other boards. I reckon I was 11 when I first came here since I was definitely in secondary school

>>35818223
that's nothing lad, /l/ was a thing when I started coming here

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>>35817248

>Broke up with ex last summer
>Last sex was July 8th 2016
>Haven't spoken a word since
>Bored this evening
>Decide to stalk her facebook
>See she gave birth on March 22nd

>pic related is me right now

What are the statistical chances that it could be mine, given a last sex of July 8th, and a birth of March 22.

>>35818457
I'd say even 50/50 or so. That's 8 months and 14 days. You need to find out if the baby was premature.

>>35818457
don't worry lad, bitch would have had her hand in your wallet by now if she could

>>35818506
>>35818509

I feel fucking sick, this is the shit that only happens on TV

>>35818509
>Anons ex moves on after the breakup
>Finds out she's pregnant
>Not sure if it's anons or her current partners
>Current partner is forced to raced Anons kid
>New boyfriend is cucked by a frogposter

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>>35818457
the prophecy has come true

>>35818264
Same, I've had fun but have zero to show for the time I've spent here. I also lost anything and anyone social I once had since starting to browse. I traded social potential for shitposting, not sure if it was the wisest choice.

>>35818325
Never felt the need to. It was a mixture of seeing how much others got told to lurk moar as well as not really feeling like I had anything to add and it just stuck as a kind of 'look but don't touch' thing. Also didn't browse as much at the start.

>>35818428
Any notable memories from then?

>>35818506
>>35818509
>>35818565
>>35818614

Times like this I wish I were a wizard, I wish I could be amongst you, laughing at the normie who might be in a spot of bother

Just finished watching The Rover. Pretty decent. Good acting from the Aussies and the story was top. Wasn't a fan of Robert Patterson's accent though, he sounded like a hillbilly. Guy Pearce mumbled a bit but I understood what he said. Music choices felt the most off, went from a classic apocalypse score to playing contemporary music that did not fit the setting. Ending was a surprise, didn't expect it to be about getting his dog's body back instead of his car

>>35818380
>Shit board lad.

yeah, it is pretty bad. its pretty much a turbo normie board. if you say anything criticizing women they tell you to go back to r9k. the advice on there is typically shit too. its just people asking about relationships and getting obvious advice in return. i asked for advice a few times and it was a waste of time.

i have never really spent much time on /b/ because there is always too much porn on there. i have have on /v/ a bit. spent a bit of time on history and humanity when i first came on it but quickly realised i wasnt educated enough in history or philosophy to properly join.

think i only went on /adv/ because it was the only kinda random board i knew of with out porn. dont really like /r9k/ but i only ever come on brit feel now because its different than the rest of 4chan. its more comfy here.

>>35818692
she was either cheating on you or its yours. why the fuck wouldent she tell you though?

>>35818681
>Any notable memories from then?
can barely remember anything from my life back then let alone 4chan posts

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Who here can proudly say that they still Ragga Ragga Ragga Ragga?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TzPWqnh-DQE
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TzPWqnh-DQE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TzPWqnh-DQE

>Badman, roll up the ganja
>Rockstar, no de Rasta
>Let me continue the saga
>Young nigga on the come up
>My nigga I'm on the road now
>New rims on a Honda, up in the trap and they know
>They know I'm coming like karma
>Zaga, zaga, zaga, zaga
>Came here for the gwalas, no time for no drama

i hate /v/, it feels more like a gamefaqs board
/sp/ is pretty shit as well, facebook-tier comments

I CAN'T FUCKING SLEEP REEEEEE

>>35818457
hahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhaha

I am in this same exact boat. I don't know what to do either.

>oneitis asks me to go to a restaurant
>think I finally have a date
>find out earlier today she meant with her friends

fucking hate women lads.

>>35818824
>i hate /v/,

people are too elitist on /v/. i remember saying i only play game casually and someone had a go at me saying i am ruining the gaming industry lol.

>>35818931

Tell me more of your story anon

>>35818937
She knew exactly what she was fucking doing.

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>>35818785
>can't remember significant life events
>but he remembers the lolis

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i got an IP range ban on a board, for no reason (haven't broken a rule, gotten a warning or a ban). without having to buy a fucking 4chan pass to avoid this, how can i fix this problem? i've contacted mods and everyone but they haven't unban me. is there a way to change my actual IP range? i've reset my router to change IP address by it says that the range is still ban.

>>35819202
Did you just turn your router on and off again?

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>>35819277
i'm not very tech savvy so excuse my ignorance. i unplugged it and stuck a pin in that thin hole with a click like i normally do to change my ip address, but it still says i'm range banned. so its obviously my area in total thats ban?

>>35819202
it said i was banned from this board this morning when i first posted but when i posted against it didnt say i was banned. i swear 4chan is acting glitchy.

my mate has been banned a few times for no reason too. it said my ban was because i have been reported too many times but doesent make sense because i very rarely shit post or troll

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>>35819277
>>35819378
i've sent countless of messages in the feedback, for isp, mods and bug reports. and it hasn't been addressed by them. 2 days.

>>35819202
hey ganges

really do have an irrational hated of people that deface currency lads, it's for everyone to use, it's not for you to wright your fucking shopping list on

>>35819571

i draw little logos on every single note i get before i pay for things with them, im still waiting to get one back in change yet, i think ill have a good feeling of accomplishment when that happens

TAKE IT IN YOUR HEART NOW LOVER

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not original but fuck me i really hate facebook, scrolled through it there for two secs and it just annoys me, everything about it haha, mental how people just live their lives on it, not questioning the shite they share/post, i'd delete it if weren't for family/friends

>>35819571
Depends on how it's defaced for me. Someone from fatpeoplehate was stamping the link to it on his notes before using them, which was bretty gud.

>>35819629
>>35819688
absolutely sickening, bet you two lads have no problem just smearing your shit all over the wall to

>>35819734

i wouldnt smear my shit on the wall because my hands would get dirty

The latter half of Jessica Jones has got fucking wild lads

>>35819850
JJ taking the bbc was very hot.

>>35819734
I'm tempted to write "Get fucked" or something to that effect with a timestamp and post it but I'm too lazy. I just want you to know I considered it.

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>>35819850
>Jessica Jones
spoopy

>>35819667

i got facebook to stalk my ex/oneitis, over the years ive become scared of stalking her because everytime i see how far shes moved on i feel more and more shit, now i hate even hearing her name mentioned

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>Work tomorrow
fuck lads.....really cannot be bothered

>>35819930
Jesus lad why put yourself through that.

>>35819907
sounds like the kind of thing a degenerate autist would do, yeah

>>35819951

maybe i worded it wrong, i mean after a while i just stopped because of how shit it was making me feel, so i havent stalked her for a good 4 years or so now, but her name still gets brought up every now and again and that always kills a good mood if im in one

>>35819922
I don't know why, but that skinny chick incredibly attractive to me.

>>35819991
I can relate, every shitty social network I have to engage with keeps suggesting my ex to me and I can't bare to click her profile to even find out

>>35820049

yea exactly thats what i mean, i used to be able to click and stalk around but now i cant stand it and as stupid as it sounds, even though it was making me feel really shit, it was a hard habit to break

housemates left their essays too late and are still fucking awake trying to get them done for noon today

all i can hear is the kettle constantly and fuckin classical music for some reason??? if i wasnt nocturnal i would be so pissed but im just simmering with annoyance rn

95th for wanting to die

>>35820081
Kek. I think there was a study that said classical music increases cognitive performance. And the kettle is probably for coffee.

Last minute shit like that is why I'm afraid of getting back into education.

>>35820081
I kind of know how you feel. My flatmates keeps inviting friends around and they're up late making mild amounts of noise that you can just about hear but would be dickish to complain about.

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>>35820011
Same here, lad. I tried chatting her up on twitter, but she was not having it.

>>35820106
i had the same essay due but i got mine done yesterday i just don't get it, it's like intellectual self harm leaving shit to the last minute

>>35820114
i remember back when i was living at home and my dad used to complain about the noise of the fan for my xbox. if that isnt petty i dont know what is

Just listening to some bon jovi instrumentals and i dont even like bon jovi, think ive officially hit rock bottom as far as avoiding going to bed before 5am goes

I can see what Varg is on about now
http://i.4cdn.org/gif/1490531452002.webm

house of cards is great, i love kevin spacey

>10/10 comfy political drama

>>35820303
That necrotic pussy though. She seems methy.

>>35820304
Just looks like edgy shite to me

>>35820304
I've tried watching it twice and get up to him becoming the pres/russian storyline and end up quitting, great dialogue and spacey is great though.

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>>35819935
iktf too well lad. I need to be up in 3 hours for work but I'm up eating takeaway pizza, drinking some smirnoff and coke and playing WipeOut

If you don't main Icaras, you're a traitor to Britain and most of all, a pleb.

>>35820496
Classic wipeout represents the best of britain at the time, psygnosis, designers republic, warp records

>tfw they built houses over the park where i used to play as a kid
>tfw they closed and demolished the rock pub i used to go to in college with QTs
>tfw i just heard they are building a new bypass road through one of my favourite places to be alone, smoke a few cigarettes and clear my head

the world is changing lads and i dont like it

>>35820496
i got 2097 recently just for the soundtrack (game still holds up with a few beers)
>>35820644

>>35820303
that's fucking disgusting, but can i get some sauce pls?

i'm asking for a friend.

We're almost a third through the year lads. I don't like it, things should move slower than this

>>35820856

time wont be moving slow enough for me until it starts moving backwards

>>35820856
Make it stop, lads. I don't want to keep going

>>35820680
Adapt or die.

>only ever have the confidence to talk to oneitis when drunk
>haven't drunk in 6 months
>haven't spoken to her in 6 months

Really want to talk to her lads, but how do I explain the 6 month silence

>scratch my arse
>sniff my hand
>smells of shite
I need to show

>>35821374
>how do I explain the 6 month silence
By saying you're drunk

>>35821383
i only realized at like the age of 14/15 that you need to wash your arse properly in the shower. i never used, i just always figured the soapy water running down my back was sufficient enough in cleaning it.

I'm the outcast weirdo at work and everytime some stupid cunt rings me up or tries to mess with me, or goes tell on me, I reply saying how much I love her, that we're soul mates and I think we'll marry one day

They get very offended by this, it's funny

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Opinions?

Seems universal praise for the 4 songs released so far except for those people who don't like rap.

>>35821956
Liked Andromeda and We've got the power, disliked Saturnz Barz but it might grow on me, and I hated Ascension. This might be because I don't usually like rap

>>35821956
How big is the emphasis on rap? I don't really like Gorillaz but I'm a big hiphop fan. Might give it a listen

>>35821956
Saturnz Barz > Andromeda > We Got the Power > Ascension

I didn't like Ascension at first, but I'm warming up to it.

>>35822076
Following exactly what I said, sounds about right really.

I like Ascension, I appreciate how they made Staples hit an authentic sounding british rap track. Andromeda is probably the most loved, because it's classic Demon days style banger through and through.

>>35822084
2/4 songs released so far have rap. One is Vince Staples which is kind of Drake / Mainstream american rap and the other is Jamaican insp. rap which you probably won't be able to work out what he's saying in the verse. The beats behind both are fat enough that I love them though.

>>35822112
THESKYSFALLINBABYDROPTHATASS'FORITCRASH

>>35822137
>Vince Staples
Big fan, going to go listen to them now

>>35822137
>the other is Jamaican insp. rap which you probably won't be able to work out what he's saying in the verse
I understood him just fine and I don't think I have ever interacted with a Jamaican

Taken a bit of skin off my nipple and now existence is fucking suffering.

Right lads, gave them a listen. Have a non-Gorillaz fans opinion

Ascension > Andromeda > We Got The Power > Saturnz Barz

>>35822355
Crikey lad, carve it up with a razor? I bloody hate nipple hair too.

>>35818811
RAGGA RAGGA RAGGA RAGGA

ROLL UP DAT GANJA

ROCKSTAR NOT A RASTA

RAGGA RAGGA RAGGA RAGGA

>>35822383
Na, caught it with my thumbnail. Stupid, obsolete body part. All they do is show up through shirts and cause pain.

>>35822397
Ooga booga booga
I am a nigga
A black man not a gorilla
Ooga booga booga

>>35822485
thats the spirit. get in there lad. gemini major is based AS FUCK. literally changing the malawian music scene with his new stuff.

Lads help I think I'm turning into a Werejew.

>tfw stockpiling all my money in case something happens

>>35822641
>stockpiling something whos value is tied to society

lmao

>have to be up for work in 1 hour 40 minutes
>have to go out with some mates after my shift to a restaurant
>probably won't get home until 10-11pm

I'm so tired already lads, why am I like this

>>35822641
Stockpile precious metals not currency, you cretin

>>35822743
You're like this because you dread waking up so you refuse to sleep

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>>35822743
>Having mates to go out with

Neenawneenaw, NORMIE ALERT.

I had phone sex with that 2/10 girl again. Don't like her but her voice makes me diamonds. She wants to meet up but I don't think I want to.

>>35822743
It's not that bad if you're doing shit. I stayed up for around 50 hour last year because I was constantly doing shit.

>>35822793
>2/10

Don't do it, kek. Most guys are pretty forgiving with their ratings, so a 2/10 must be truly fucking awful.

>>35822825
Binge watching TV shows and posting here tbqh

>>35822847
She is awful, but her voice is incredibly sexy and somehow sweet at the same time. I actually swore it came from a different girl when I first heard it. Lads, I've never experienced anything like it. Most of the munters had horrific voices to go along.

>>35822962
Post a pic lad

Of course it isn't original

>>35822878
Probably won't kep you awake. You need to be on your feet.

I normally give up, go to sleep and have to force myself to get up after nowhere near enough sleep.

>>35823024
Ah I thought you meant why am I awake. I'll be constantly doing shit at work

Very foggy outside lads, bit spooky

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>tfw my ryu costume is all here, just need to alter sleeves with scissors
>on a cocktail of drugs and DNP
>175lbs and burning 4500+ calories a day

Been lying in bed and sleeping 12 hours a day for the past few days and I'm burning like hell.

Just went out at 6am to the nearby tescos to buy a 2 liter tub of light vanilla ice cream and a strawberry trifle and glazed doughnuts and a 350ml reduced sugar chocolate yazoo (just buying this shit brings me pleasure).

Managed to willpower myself to only eat 1 tablespoon and just keep it in the freezer, now I feel so much better after experiencing the cool breeze and an ice cold bottle of chocolate milk. 2500 cals out of 4500 at the end of the day. proud of my self control desu

>>35823999
Ngl, that DNP sounds like the stuff of miracles if you can handle it. I'm over here failing to stay around 1500 calories.

hitler speeches are my ASMR desu

>>35824571
Going out tonight lads... To a friends houss to play vidya.

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>when you see people who say Islam is tyrannical call for equally tyrannical laws

i'm sick of being a neet shut in friendless virgin. how do i find people to go out with?

I'm so tired that my eyes can't focus properly lads, they keep spazzing out.

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>family waking up
>I haven't even slept yet

Guess it's time for me to get ready for work lads

Whats even the point of trying to get a gf lads?

No girl is going to be interested in the same things as me, which would mean in order to keep her around I would have to hide aspects of my personality. And what kind of relationship is that?

>>35826205
What's your interests lad? If you like them what makes you think nobody else does?

Fuck wage slaving lads. Never do it if you can avoid it.

I've been doing it for a year and a half now and I've hated it since the start. It's even a pretty cushy job and I still can't handle it.

Am I meant to do this for the rest of my life without questioning it? Is no one I'm working with questioning it?

If someone walked upto me when I was in bed tomorrow morning and told me to either get up for work or die I would probably not even move.

>>35826325
a healthy mix of /x/, /vr/, /a/ and hiking high up into hills to sit and stare back at the city for hours

>>35826506
Sounds comfy lad, I bet there is a girl out there with those exact hobbies though

>>35826205
The issue I have is that I can't even be bothered to but the effort in to my own life so I don't see how I"ll be able to do it for someone else.

Monday morning therapy anon here.
sigh.
been sunny all weekend, now its fucking grey when I actually have to go out.
gonna have a cheeky bowl of oats.

rustlers burger and a can of fosters for breakfast

>>35826857
Breakfast of kings lad, I had a cathedral cheese spread sandwich, salt and vinegar walkers and a can of coke

>it has just dawned on me I've played Wipeout HD non stop since 10pm

>>35826490
but what alternative is there? bennies isn't enough money to live on.

>>35826972
I don't fucking know. There is no alternative unless your born rich or the welfare system changes in our lifetime.

>>35826857
>>35826915

>not having some ice cold or hot as hell rice pudding for breakfast

If you want something heavier get some angus or caramelized onion sausages to go with your crumpets.

>>35826972

Go on dates with gay men and make them pay dinner, but don't initiate any sexual shit since you're taking it slow.

At least enjoy some of the nicer things in life without having to pay.

>>35826490
We're you posting in the Truman thread on /TV/ talking about the same stuff?

Idk lad, personally I'm in uni ATM but I'm probably gonna drop out and start wageslaving, hoping i can get a comfy warehouse job. I fucking hate studying, i should have learnt my lesson from college

>>35827022
Yeah that was me. I hated studying aswell so I figured this would be better but I'm just sick of it. Every morning on the way to work I hope some accident happens so I either die or don't have to go. I feel like that can't be a healthy way to live for prolonged periods of time.

>>35827057
What's your job?

I imagine working an office job doing menial spreadsheet shit would make me feel the same 2bh

Have you considered manual labour? It's my second option desu

>>35827097
It's half IT support shit half bs spreadsheet shit. I'm getting a qualification with it at the moment but I think once I've got that I might make a few switches to try and find something I don't hate.

>watch just broke
>don't have enough money for the watch that I was saving up for

Do I buy a another cheap one for the time being or just wear this broken one for another month?

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I want to stay home and play vidya

> wake up to phone call
> Is recruiter for one of the many jobs i applied for
> Asks me some technical Java questions
> Get most wrong
> "I'll phone you back in a month"

Why are recruiters the worst people on earth lads?

>>35827201
When tbey ask if you have time to answer a few questions its okay to say no.

>1 quid of emergency electric left
>no money for more
it's the final countdown lads

>>35827310
can you pay it via paypal

>>35827317
no, it requires taking the key to a shop to top it up

>>35827337
damn, sorry bud

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Say, that's a nice snacko

>>35827201
jesus i had exactly the same thing, but its not been a month yet

bet i wont hear back

>>35827353
I'll get by probably, I don't know how long the stuff in the freezer will last but I have a gas camping stove which I can at least cook something on

are there people who actually thinking sucking dick is gay? 1. you're sharing protein 2. you're admiring masculine physique 3. being in the vacinity of other high testosterone males increases your own testosterone

eating pussy is gay because you're litterally slurping down estrogen. and long term relationships have been proven to lower testosterone.

spartans had gay orgies all the time and they were the height of masculinity. you bet they were at least fondling eachothers test produces

>>35827453
Where are you laddo? orugugug

>>35827505
I'm in West Wales

>>35827511
Can you go to your local council and ask for emergency funds?

>>35827278
Really lad? Might have to do it

>>35827411
Client server?

Can't stop pooing lads

>>35827525
they don't have crisis loans or anything like that

>>35827550
lmao, yeah thats the one.

was especially confused by 'what other method do you have to override when doing .equals' or something like that.

i have no hope

>>35827201
They only times I ever had that they only really asked personal questions and not technical ones Would have been fucked otherwise. I could barely answer the personal ones.

Didn't die in my sleep again, Lads.


Originally

I stuck a screw into the side of my desks to hold my headphones so now I'm pretty much a DIY god. Could probably build a house if I wanted to .'

Pretty sure I just scared the shit out of a guy in the accounting office when I opened the door and told someone the copier was free.

>>35827636

Unlucky mate, you'll get there one day.

Who watches The Wright Stuff? Shakespeare - good or bad?

>Just got fired

Welllppppppppp.
Brotip - never be a chef. It's a horrible industry.

Got a fucking normie birthday party on Friday and I'm already fucking anxious. Clubs are shit and thats the kinda stuff they're into. I miss house parties. It was easier to fake being a normie at those.

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>>35817248
>cursor starts moving on it's own
>clicks on the firefox icon in the taskbar
>goes to the teamviewer website and attempts to download it
>hop out of bed and quickly turn off pc

Objective for today: try and have a full poo

>>35827878
If he already had control of your PC surely they wouldn't need to download teamviewer?

>>35827872

Never work in pubs or restaurants, you can guarantee that 90% of owners are complete and utter cunts as if you make a mistake they treat it as if you have stolen from them. Once when I first started the menu said people get a free orange juice with a breakfast so I gave the person an orange juice but then the owner started screaming that it was a SMALL orange juice even though it didn't say so and made out that I practically stole 3 pounds off him.

IRA pub bombings can't come back soon enough tbqh

>>35827590
Exactly man, like I've not even graduated yet I've never had to overwrite equals. You still in uni?

>>35827939

work at pubs? why would you even want to BE in a pub?

It's full of obese middle aged men, boarish ugly women, children that shout and scream all day and pensioner old ladies who cause nothing but trouble.

Oh and good lord don't even think about being in one at night time.

>>35817759
who is the faggot that keeps posting this thing and why is he shitting up my /britfeels/?

Whats a good easy routine for aesthetics I can do with only dumbells in my bedroom?

>two roasties wear glorified tights on plane
>get banned for showing off their cammeltoe and fat asses
>nooooo it's sexist
.national news
fuck this world man

>>35827989

This is true, bar work is not robot friendly.

I used to panic and make up prices for drinks when I worked in a bar. I used to ignore women as well because they always wanted cocktails where blokes just wanted pints.

>>35828150

>pubs
>cocktails

stupid fucking chavettes, don't they know that pubs are for working class people and families who live off of shitty "locally brewed" beer and whatever slop you can make with batter/breading and a deep fryer?

that's like going to go sushi expecting a proper blue fin tuna sashimi,

>>35827989
I sometimes go to the pub quiz at our local one and it's not that bad.

I'd rather go to a pub than a club any day of the week

>>35828359

I'd rather go to neither.

worse are those pretentious shitty pubs selling gourmet chav burgers for 14 quid.

bit of bacon and blue/goat's cheese with the patty on a brioche bun, lol luxury fuck off.

>brioche bun on a burger

just fucking sprinkle it with sugar while you're at it you obese fucks, no other country would do something that fucking stupid with a hamburger.

>>35823999
>DNP
Did you use the discount code POLEABOO to get 20% from the chink dealers lad?

>>35826722
just got back, time for another cuppa then back to bed for a bit me thinks.

poo plonky poo

>GP refers me for a psych evaluation at the hospital because of my anxiety
>Doctor or whatever the fuck she was at the hospital genuinely tells me I should get tested for autism because she noticed signs of it in our 20 min appointment

wew
wew

>>35828457

Join the adult diagnosed autist master race m8.

Be prepared to put aside a few of days for the testing and make sure your mum can go along too.

>>35828483
what do you get out of it lad? im 100% sure i have undiagnosed autism but whats the point in me going through the mental torture of seeing doctors and goig to the hospital etc if i get fuck all out of it?

>>35828578
they basically told me that if I get diagnosed I can go to support groups lmao

>>35828578
You can probably get bennies for it. PIP or ESA or something.

>get a job
>try it for almost a month, its just not something i can do
>tell boss im quiting, she says ok
>ask when ill get payed for the work i did, she says end of the month same as everyone else
>time comes, no payment
>phone up and ask whats up, she says she is sending cheques out and they will arrive the next day
>ask why they needed my bank details if they use cheques, she hangs up
>two days go by, wage slip comes but no cheque
>phone up, get told boss is in a meeting and to call back in an hour
>this goes on for 6 hours with different excuses, tell person on the phone that im going down to speak to her myself
>boss calls me instantly, says she will send cheque again and cancel the other one so theres no need to go down
>go down anyway, get put in a room with some guy
>gives me a cheque and says "problems with the royal mail, innit"
>surprisingly it works and i get my money

what a fucking hassle

>>35828596
and this is the exact reason i wont bother wasting my time, i dont need to be told by a doctor that i have autism and severe anxiety when i already know that i do.. and i certainly dont want to attend any fucking support groups. seems like a massive waste of time which id get nothing from besides being told somethinf i already know, the only thing that would tempt me is if i knew i could get bennies out of it

>>35820680
I went back to my childhood area last summer after 20 years for some comfy nostalgia.

It used to be a shitty, decrepit council estate full of needles and boarded up windows.

I saw for sale signs (they're like 70k for 2 bedroom, 80k for 3 bed) and new cars

Apart from that though, not much had changed. Still seems like a bit of a chav area judging by the graffiti, but they haven't touched the parks, the local pub is still going and it STILL has a Super Sidekicks 2 arcade machine in it, and there's a bunch of playing fields of about 20+ acres that they haven't built on which made me happy as it seems like prime development material.

Nothing should change!

>>35828622
arent they revising all that shit though? i remember there was some articles going around that were saying they're making disability benefits hard to claim for anyone that has any disability that isnt physical because they think that no matter what your mental illness is theres a job suitable out there somewhere

its all fucking confusing and it makes no sense to me, all i know is that ill never be a functioning member of society

>>35828630
>get a new job
>fill in my bank details
>made a mistake
>go 3 months without being paid
>figure it's just in arrears
>go down to the finance department
>'oh haha, there was a payment that keeps bouncing back'
>get it all sorted out
>they give me 3 months wages in cash
>walk home with 3 months wages in cash on me

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>>35828630
Good man. They were trying to get out of paying you and were hoping you would just bend over and take it, like a lot of people would.

Too many people, normals included, wouldn't have pushed them and would have just let it go and not got paid.

>>35828713
The fact you aren't living paycheck to paycheck and went 3 months without receiving your wages says to me you're not fucking useless with money like most mongs

Good lad

>>35828746
im still living with mummy

yeah i have some money saved up and i'm very frugal

when was the last time you looked in the mirror lads? looked at my self for the first time in a few months earlier on and i barely recognized my self

>>35828816
I'm always looking at myself in the mirror. Scanning for new flaws and squeezing spots and blackheads.

>>35828816
this morning, I look at myself in the mirror while I brush my hair

>>35828683

ESA should be pretty easy to get with autism, just hope you get the support group not the activity group so they leave you alone. PIP is harder because it's based on how your disability affects you, not what it is.

>>35828856
Comb, lad. You comb your hair.

>>35828893
no, I brush my hair. I use a hair brush because I have long hair

>>35817248

At banks, is there a kind of limit where above which they question why you are depositing so much?

I've got 6,000 in 50 bong notes to deposit, but I just know they will thing it's drug money and will start interrogating me about it. I'd rather them not pry, even though it was legitimate casino winnings.

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What kind of music do anons like to listen to during a night walk?

>>35828931
It's not enough to raise suspicion.

It would need to be over 10k for them to start asking questions.

Also you have a legitimate reason to have the cash so don't worry about it.

>>35828972

Eurobeat originally

>>35828730
Fuck off, as if anyone would work for free for three months.

>>35828816
I have chronic low self-esteem. I used to self-harm when looking in the mirror

It must have been 5 or 6 years since I last looked.

I'd probably be hit with despair if I tried it now

>>35828972
I far prefer podcasts to music on a walk.

>>35828913
Cut your hair, you girl.

>>35828931
if they ask tell them it's casino winnings then. I think they would be more suspicious if you were coming in often with large amounts of cash to deposit, isn't there a machine you can deposit into anyway?

>>35828931
You might have to fill out tax froms at the end of the year since you were earning money. However winnings from gambling are exempt from tax so you'd just have to put down what you won and say how you won it but wouldn't have to pay tax on it

>>35829027
No. I like it this way

>>35817592
Delete cookies

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Why aren't you a Neopagan or an Atheistic Satanist yet /britfeel/?

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>>35828630

>Get a job
>They mispay wages 2 months in a row
>Cause 29,000 worth of damage
>Never get found out about it

>>35829058
If I was going to be anything, it'd be Catholic

>>35829058
neopagans are just as bad as abramhic religions. neo druids are the absolute fucking worse though, they can suck a fat dick

>>35828874
so how would i go about getting on ESA and how much does it benefit you per month? if its like 200 quid a month and i have to go to numerous doctors appointments and fucking support groups id honestly rather not do it, i have crippling anxiety that makes leaving the house a pretty brutal task so id prefer being poor in the comfort of being alone if it was a toss up between the two

>>35829119
And what are you then?

oregano

>>35829133
i don't believe in any skyfather

>>35829058
Wednesday was absolutely based. If I ever have a daughter, I hope she turns out like Wednesday. Mad and immortal.

My dad came out as gay to the family yesterday.

I had no idea but my older sister said she already knew. Apparently her friend from uni saw him in a gay club in London a few years ago.

Am I right to be angry that she didn't tell me?

>>35819930
I do that only it's not her Facebook profile


It's her adultwork profile

>>35829120

It's just under 250 quid every two weeks. You apply, fill out the long form or have someone do it for you, then if you get in the Support Group you don't have to do anything at all.

>>35829148
Did you inherit his homolust?

>>35827969
yeah, i did my degree but am doing a masters in the same stuff just to put off getting a job.

been doing java for 4 years and i feel unqualified

>>35826972

I work as a cleaner 3 hours a day and get housing benefit for the rent. The job is easy and it's only a 20 minute walk away. Reckon I have it really lucky all things considered.

>>35829156
but how can i make sure i get into the support group? i know for certain i wouldnt be able to handle the activity group where you have to turn up to sessions and talk to people, but i guarantee thats the road they'd try to shove me down since its only autism and anxiety which they consider meme illnesses

wish things would just be straight forward for a pathetic person like my self t b h, im even put off applying for bennies because im scared they'll make me have to talk to people

>>35829184
No. I am completely straight.

>half term
>get woken up by sister trying to get a peak of my morning wood

Having a sister going through puberty is tiring lads.

>>35829191

Well I applied for it just having OCD and depression listed and got the support group, later I was diagnosed with autism too, I've read that you are not obligated to go to those meetings even if you do get in the activity group but if you fill out the form well I think you'd get on the support bracket just fine. There are quite a lot of websites that have guides on how to fill out the form, there is a really good one for applying for PIP on the citizens advice bureau so I presume there will be one for ESA on there too.

called in sick lads

going to make homemade soup and watch some films

not even ill desu

>>35829194
Then he can't really be gay, right? He's just a degenerate.

>>35827310
3 hours since this, my blackout can't be far away now

>>35829218
How do you know she was trying to see your cock lad?

>>35829256
Quickly charge up all the batteries in your house.

>>35829238
gay isn't always genetic / nature, environment / nurture e.g being abused and stuff can fuck you up too

t. got abused as a kid and has forever since struggled with tranny feels

>>35829256
buy more money!!!1

>>35829260
Lifting up the duvet from the bottom and then giggling and going bright red when I asked what she was doing, she gave some lame "looking for something" excuse.

>>35829256
When do you get more money lad?

>>35829282
You should have said "Did you want to see this?" and showed her your cock.

>>35829262
ahead of the game lad, got my phone charged, all lamps I could find have been charged and I've got batteries for torches as well as a way to cook food

>>35829285
I'm expecting payments within the next few days but if they don't come in then it will be friday

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What did she mean by this, /britfeel/?

>>35828090
OK FIRST OF ALL HOW DARE YOU

YAAAAAAAS

>>35829322
>Jasper

No wonder you ended up here. Some people just don't have a chance.

>>35829322
>Jasper

what are your favourite Tom and Jerry shorts lad?

>>35829309
Will be a tough few days but it sounds like you are well prepared. Hopefully you don't need to wait until friday.

>>35829331

>>35829322

lmao 0wned bitch

>>35829187
Apparently the answer is the hashcode which I guess makes sense. Not at 9am though

>>35829322
It means "please stop texting me"

>>35829322
it means she had a bit to drink wtf u think it means
no real way to tell if she's into u at this stage my dude, seems interested tho

Has anyone here done an HNC in computing science?

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Monkman vs Seagull on University Challenge tonight lads

This is basically guaranteed to be quizkino right?

>>35829389
who is this?

>tfw all the UC qts are outrageous feminists

>>35829388
Is it actually computer science though or just programming/IT shit?

>>35829408
>highly educated women are feminists

hmm... really... makes you...

>>35827310
shame you wasn't using a trip or I would have paypalled you a tenner or something

>>35829414
It's "computing" with computer science in brackets

I've not done computing since I left school 5 years ago, but they accept just a higher in maths so I'm assuming the level isn't too high. I'm wanting to do this because I fucked up my first degree in biology

>>35829425
I don't use a trip but if you're genuine then I can make a throwaway email

>>35829361
extreme levels of sodium chloride

>>35829365
She's Polish, like 30 and a massive hipster
She's 9 years older than me, what a fucking predator

>>35829417
still sad m8

>>35829457
there's no indisputable way for me to verify you're that guy so not going to do it, sorry

>>35829474
sure there is
>electric anon uses a trip
>you reply to both posts
>get electric anon to screen record the post and post that, so he can't just photoshop and image
>???
>he profits

tfw just took 30mg valium and no qt handsome muscler bf to cuddle with and stroke my hair
>>35829148
if she told you wouldnt that just be betraying your dad as well?

>>35829474
fair enough lad, I aint about to start begging

>>35829148
No, it's not her place to say. It's his choice when and where he comes out. She did the right thing.

im 22 soon.....i feel like im 17 years old still literally no personal development since i was a teenager. there are people my age who are fucking scientists and doctors n shit and i cant even drive.

>>35829322
>H-hey everything okay?
>please respond to me

It's clear this is a one way conversation my dude.

>>35829531
im 25 and still feel like im mentally 12 or so, i havent developed at all

>>35829531

28 here, it does not get better with time.

>tfw watching videos of puppies on youtube wanting a dog but i know that i can barely look after myself and im still an unhealthy fat piece of shit and so it would be completely wrong of me to get a dog because i know i wouldnt be able to look after it

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NTQQ6U-OnQs

wish i wasnt such a pathetic oxygen thief

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So lads who's got the unscensored pic of eamonn holme's flaccid penis?

>>35829638
>there are women out there sexually attracted to eamon holmes

>>35829638
No but why the fuck does this post need two captions literally just saying how funny it is. Why not just post the pictures.

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>>35829638

I am finally useful.

>>35829747
why do you originally have this?

>>35829638
i dont fucking get it
everything i write just makes people think im retarded and weird but this unfunny dumb ass shit probably has probably been shared / rt a zillion times abd the normies laugh at it and tag their friends in it like wff

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>>35829747

g-great thanks

>>35829747
Do you really think that's eammon's or some toyboy? Skin looks too smooth for me...

>>35829747
She looks like an elephant

>>35829417
>highly educated

No, just educated. Educated doesn't mean intelligent either. You can regurgitate a bunch of wank your lecturers throw at you and still be classed as educated when you complete the degree

>>35829790
not mention eamon is like 4 times fatter and would old man pubes

so realistically whats my purpose in life? im 24 only worked for 2 years of my life and barely leave the house there genuinely is NO purpose for my existence

i dont understand it, im just destined to live a life of misery by being a pathetic human

>>35829863

If you don't spend money on kids or other normie shit then you could retire at 50 and chill out.

Nobody has a purpose.

>>35829747
She's so perfect that it hurts ;_;

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tfw playing ck2 as holland and the netherlands are so rich you afford a vast mercenary army to defeat the numerically superior french

>>35829813
University is called higher education for a reason.

>>35829863
There is no inherent purpose in life.

>>35829747
who is this seminal terminal?

>>35829747
>nobody will ever spread ur knobsack over their face and pretend ur todger is an elephant trunk

>>35829747
fuck off does eamonn holmes have a cock that cute

>>35829773
Maybe if you learned to use basic punctuation and syntactic structure people won't think you're a drooling spastic. When did you leave school?

Any fellow robots like to watch / listen to ASMR videos?

>tfw never have a girl give me attention like this

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7k9swGdJdKU

I only really like the somewhat natural ones, not the weird ones where they chew on your ears or pretend to be some fictional character.

>that polish fuck finally left the house

thank god I can now comfortable cook my lunch.
Seeing that potato faced fuck really shits up my mood.

>>35829902
>tfw you forget your meme arrow

>>35830169
I've never really gotten them tb;h. They just make me feel uncomfortable.

Lost was a bad show, accept it cucks

>>35830328
I mean who said it wasn't exactly?

>>35830328

A bit out of the blue that lad

>>35830338
>>35830348
just wanted you lads to know

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>>35829531
>turning 24 soon
>haven't been on holiday as an adult and arguably not as a child
>had no social relationships, never been to a party, never done drugs, got drunk
>no skills, can't do basic math
>no hobbies, sit on 4chan all day for the last years

at least I can drive haha, just woke up from a 16hour sleep too

>>35830375
>cant do basic math

are you black by any chance?

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When I first watched 3D porn, I think it was a Monster Hunter JAV, I wondered what would happen if the girl got pregnant, since they weren't wearing condoms

Leftover pizza for breakfast lads.

>>35830386
no just had extremely bad teachers in secondary school and forgot all the basic stuff from primary school

>>35830415
>Breakfast at 2:20pm
Living the dream

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Iceland stuffed crust pizza and fries to go for lunch today lads. A real feast, this pizza is my favorite.

>>35830328
It was good until season 4 onwards

Any Newcastle anons?

>>35830461
>British "food"

I bet you're the anon who defends tesco tiger bread.

You're probably about to tell me that Iceland frozen pizza is the best pizza in the world.

Is it gay to let a straight man fuck you? And what does it feel like?

>>35830531
it's not gay if there's money involved

>>35830531
It feels like you're doing a shit in reverse.

>>35830501
i stopped watching it during season 4, i think. i remember it not being great but i kept watching it because of the cliff hangers.

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Got two girls on the go at the moment lads. 3 dates into both and it's getting into lose my virginity at 24 territory now.

Which one do I pick? Left is a thick as fuck 19yo party girl. Right is 23yo nerdy gamer girl who is likely also a virgin.

Or should I just try to fuck em both. Do people ever get away with this shit?

>>35830152
basically when i was 14/15 in y10 bc i was doing drugs and hanging out with bad ppl generally just fucking up my life but i still turned up to do my gcses and i got a b+ in english lang / lit gcses. im not retarded...my verbal / writing skills have just got worse and worse which i think is as a result of anxiety related executive dysfunction. i cant even have conversations or just write things down a lot of the time bc the words dont make sense in my head and the sentence comes out backwards / jumbled up. but i have a high-reading comprehension tho and im rly good at spelling. which only ever comes in useful when someone wants to know what a word means and when to use it or how to spell something so basically just a entirely fucking useless thing to be good at.