ITT: we post the last thing a female human being has sent to

>>35688660
No can do, she lurks /r9k/.

>>35688660
I don't have a mobile phone so I've never sent or received a text. Never talked to any girl, family or otherwise, under 40 on any phone.

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>>35688660
>women

This is why women need to be purged so that us men can be with eachother

sweetest girl in the world she was trying to buy me neir but she couldnt but its ok her love is enough

>>35688687
>tfw no r9k gf
why live bruhs

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practically pic related

Originoli Ravioli Chad has the formuoli

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>>35688891
Fug, really? I put atrached a pic, I swear

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My dog's at her house.

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this was last night


The last thing she actually said to me was "brb, taking a bath" today, but I just feel like being a piece of shit and trying to make myself look like a normie

>>35688726
Phones are for faggots

>>35688942

> So about that sex offer, still on the table?

Don't be a faggot.

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>>35688942
Yikes, my dude. Yikes.

If you have females to communicate with, you're a fucking normie. Dele this thread, normie bitch.

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I wouldn't want her getting addicted....

the kissy emoji from my GF, after I calmed her down from an argument.

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>>35689014
I'm a proud normie :) But being a normie doesn't make me a bitch. You know what does? Being a forever alone faggot that jerks off to traps, forever being cucked by society while you sit in your mom's (nigger) husband's basement and weep

I deleted it off my phone because I've cut contact with her but.

h=her
m=me
>h: have you gotten over yourself yet and decided to be my friend or are you still going to be "all or nothing" and cut me out of your life because I'm not your girlfriend anymore
>m: I don't want to pretend to be your friend while secretly having feelings for you and trying to get back together. That's dishonest of me and painful for the both of us
>h: well I don't want to be anything more than just friends

Text end but I thought: Okay, bitch. I don't want to be demoted to JUST friends, so you're out of my life.

>>35688660
why do all the people with gfs on /r9k/ turn out to be such gross white trash?

>>35689077
wasted dubs fck off lad

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Transcribed for your sperg pleasure. The last section of a conversation I had tonight.


>Do you have snapchat?
I actually don't, I'm a bit of a luddite I'm afraid.
Should I?
>Not unless you want it!
>It's nothing important and you're not missing out on much :)
>What're your plans for tomorrow?
Hmmm you've made a strong argument haha I'll have to think about getting it.
I'm free most of tomorrow. Just gonna pop in and see my Nan for a coffee in the arvo. You?
>Well if you get it let me know and I'll thoroughly annoy you on it. I have Uni all tomorrow, busy day. But then pretty free end of week and weekend!
Haha I look forward to it.
I'll be thinking of you and your busy day as I laze around tomorrow sipping coffee.
>Ah! Not cool
;) ahaha
I'm pretty beat so I'm gonna head to my bed. Talk tomorrow yeah?

Now I've got to think of a witty fucking snapchat name.
Someone tell me how normies into snapchat.
I think it's going ok.
Gonna rev up them helium bags just incase.

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>>35689184
and I'm the sperg here?

>>35689184
>Someone tell me how normies into snapchat.

Snapchat is literally just for sending nudes and sexting each other. It's not complicated at all.

>>35688993
hey dude awesome meme can you kill yourself now ? ty

>>35689184

>Making a snap chat because a girl told you to

What a loser

>>35689142
Damn my guy. That blows. I feel for you.

>>35689228
I'll cope. I've told her numerous times that I consider going from boyfriend to friend a demotion which I will not stand for, and that I'm not going to become someone she just talks to get attention from

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>>35689207
That's kinda what I was hoping. But I am clearly not a man well versed in the pitfalls of social media.
>>35689221
B-but I want her to send me nudes and sext me

>>35689184
Yeah man, you totally suck with girls! Hahaha! Suicide memes!!! Hahaha!!!! Totally a robot!!!!!!

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It's been 2 weeks since my background check began, why hasn't my job told me anything yet. I just want to work and make money fuck.

>>35689325
Well it depends on which background check. If it's an FBI background check those can take upwards to a month.

But they probably just found a better candidate.

>>35688660
That's a really sad conversation, OP.
You can tell she's really trying to have any connection with you whatsoever.

Here's a Pro-tip: if you have to flirt with your girl over texts, she don't want you

>>35688687
op said female not tranny

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Me and gf are both semi-normies sorry

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Basically my only friend, too depressed to even make an effort anymore. I'll probably lose her like I've lost everyone else

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Here it is boring stuff

>>35689077
You sound very triggered, lad. Pretty insecure to react like that to a comment which wasn't even directly directed at you. Aren't you supposed to be hanging out with your fake friends who would drop you at the slightest sign of struggle? What's such a normie like yourself doing here anyway?
>inb4 to laff @ u bitter virgins lmao xD

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I really want to fucking die

I'm not even going to try, I guarantee this is not an original comment

>>35689406

Should've tried harder at faking it you fucking pleb

>mom: I don't like it when you ignore my messages, at least tell me you're busy right now. It feels like you don't care
>me: I'm working right now can I call you later
>mom: No it's okay
I didn't call her but I bet she wanted me to call her.

>>35689314
If only you knew.

But I'm gonna take that little sperg out you just had as a ringing endorsement that I did ok.

I literally don't have a conversation in my phone with a girl that isn't my mother

>>35689466
This is sad anon y didn't you call her

>>35689466
I might have no friends but I try to always make time for my family. They're the ones that always bail me out of the dumb situations I put myself in. It's the least I can do. I feel so bad for people with broken families.

>>35688660
Two convos simultaneously and both in Russian, I can post and translate but I don't know if I should bother.

>>35689351
I mean I flirt with her in person too, and the flirting over the phone helps us get all heated up for the next time we get together so...

>>35689801
you dont have anything better to do dude

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Ok here you go here is my original message as well

>>35689895
Yeah I'm sure that's actually yours bro haha

>>35689962
Is it that unbelievable? How can I prove such a thing?

>>35689824
I need to take a shower and do some coursework, but I'm to fucking wrecked by today, so I'm gonna listen to one more song and then go shower.

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This was from saturday. Should I message her back or just keep waiting?

>>35689325

It was all those cuck threads you started on 4chan m80.

>>35689984
Do you have some kind of condition that makes you have to piss in pots and not be able to leave your house?

>>35689406
if its an internet gf that doesnt count

>>35690075
What? She's saying she's poor as fuck right now and cant afford to do anything fun. Maybe it's not an expression Americans have.

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I'm fucking hopeless. I blocked the cunt though. Led me on one too many times.

>>35690138
Did she have a fucking stroke mid-sentance?

>>35690033

if a girl calls you "man/dude/brah/bro", she doesnt want to fuck you.

>>35690138
I honestly can't tell who's worse.

>>35690101
Oh, weird. A female saying she wants to piss in a pot is just off-putting to me.

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>>35688660
This girl is always rude to me ;___;

I was love stricken okay? And I wish she had a fucking stroke. I'm just happy she sent tits. Tried to post them but the file was apparently too fucking big.

>>35689268
Godspeed my dude you did the right thing. Fuck sluts who try to squeeze all this attention out of you

>>35690138
Explain this shit.
Did you really tell a girl you aren't dating that you love her? This isn't an anime that ain't right.

>>35690239
>no qt to banter with

I'm pretty jealous, cunt.
Put out a few feelers with some jabs back next time.

>see verizon
oh you're a burger
sorry for your loss. If I had a million years I couldn't teach a yank to banter.

>>35690239
This person is pathetically annoying to talk to, I can already see it

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>>35688660
Posted this a few times but what the hell what's one more

Yeah I did. She never really wanted to make it official. It kinda pissed me off but she would tell me how much she loved me everyday. Now that I think about it I should have noticed, she slowly lost touch and stopped talking to me and it all culminated in that.

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>>35690287
>>35690321

>yanks can't banter
Gimme some lessons, man. I think I've got some of it down but I definitely need to sharpen the bantz a bit.

Girl is a short Ethiopian qt who can banter back so help me out I need you /r9k/

>>35690237
Yeah girls from the north of England are usually pretty rough around the edges. Usually more of a laugh though

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>>35690350
She looks like a hambeast. Is she?

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>>35690422
>Ethiopian
That's where you went wrong m8.

>>35690350
why so many exclamation marks
why is she so excited

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I made the tits fit

>>35688660
>soory we can't meet i gave exam
>sorry i am shoping at xxx so i can't met you

>>35689142
Tell her to just fuck off holy shit.

>>35690138
At least you've got a fuckton of notifications

>>35688660
>i'll stuff your slut-oven with my baby batter
That's attractive?

I have another one if anyone wants

>>35690547
To her it is.

>>35690422
You just gotta feel it.
It's funny first, insulting second. "Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke" is kinda the idea. Really helps you weed out shitcunts.

Anyway you're actually doing fine, don't force it. You're holding your own without slinging fire which is a skill in itself. The only advice I can give you is never get butthurt about bants, and sometimes a quick 'fuck off' can put someone in check. Always call out bad banter game and don't be a cunt.

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Long story

Oreganollo

>>35690580
But it's entirely comedic.

>>35690631
It's comedic from the outside, but when you're both turned on it's a different matter entirely.

>>35690547
No it's cringe.
Every couple on earth who text write similar levels of kinky shit to each other but thats just hilarious, not sexy.

>>35690611
>long story
What did she do to hurt you anon? We're all friends here :^)

>>35690611
>being so gay

Girl or guy?

>>35690670
Like I said before, it's cringey from the outside, but when you're both turned on (and she's super horny from her period) it's a different matter.

>>35690725
>it's cringey from the outside

It's cringey from the inside, too. She's just being nice but saying the wrong thing over text is instant aridification of the vagina

>>35690659
>>35690725
Nah, m8. "Slut-oven" and "baby batter" don't come across as sexy even when you're horny. There are much better phrases to use.

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I straight up told gf that I was about to walk to 7-11 for 4AM ice cream

>>35690781
We've been together for a year and a half now, so any aridification of the vagina can be quickly solved with some neck kisses or other stuff. She has a huge fetish for impregnation though, so I assure you she's not just being nice.

>>35690816
See >>35690835
Originagliolioli

My supervisor just looked at me like I was a fresh piece of young African venison ready to be buttered up and eaten whole. I can die happy now.

>>35690437
No.
>>35690478
I couldn't tell ya! She's just naturally excited about stuff!

>>35690879
Vore fetish?

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Glad to see I'm not the only normie

>>35689268
I agree with your attitude but god damn you phrase it in the spergiest fucking way.

>>35690835
>neck kisses

Holy shit you're a noob. If you want to get a girl turned on that's weak shit. Check under the hood instead. If you keep up with this baby batter shit she'll dump you before your 2 year anniversary

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>>35690914
Translate please, or you get thrown back over the wall.

>>35690101
I'm an American and I've heard that expression before

>>35690945
>you're a noob
You're right, but she is too. So neck kisses still work on her. I'm not saying that's the only thing I do, but she really loves those.

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origunal and apu an depression

>>35691010
Ouch. Friendzone? Do you have feelings for her?

>>35691010
What was the picture?

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>>35691023
>>35691030
Yup I have feelings for her but she already said that I'd never have a chance with her. Even if I was Prince Charming

>>35691010
>I wuv you
>I love you too, Marie

KEK aw I'm so sorry bud

>>35691084
Ouch man, that fucking hurts. Those cutesy messages are a double edged sword.

>>35691084
>she already said that I'd never have a chance with her.
Take it from an old man, stop being friends with this girl, this shit is bad for you.

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>>35691084
That sucks man. I know that feel. I wish you the best.

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>>35691084
Holy shit dude... End yourself originally

>>35691084
Ouch man, that fucking hurts. Those cutesy messages are a double edged sword.
Green text the story.

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>>35691084
>that is the cutest meme I've ever seen

>>35691084
>>35691010
Please don't torture yourself like this.
Jesus man, I know these feels way, way way too fucking well.

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>>35691084
>>35691030
here's the gif
>>35691091
yeah i feel like gouging my eyes out

>>35691139
>yeah i feel like gouging my eyes out
Then fucking ghost her. Read her messages and laugh instead of replying. You can be friends with a girl but not like this.

>>35691109
>>35691116
>>35691128
>>35691130
>>35691135
>>35691136
>>35691138
sounds good i think i will end myself.

>>35690910
Nah, just anal and thigh highs.

>>35689413
get your head out of your ass anon

huygy

>>35691170
I love you like a brother, Anon, so avoid that.
Just ghost out on her. Try again, you got one girl talking to you, why not another.

>>35691194
Quality kinks.

>>35690914
Filthy argie or just a mexican pretending to be something he isn't..

Please get out you piece of shit also
The falklands are british.

>>35689184
You don't need a witty username ffs. Just put your name with a number after or some shit

>>35691297
Can you read that? What did he say?

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>>35691297
>The falklands are british.
Damn right lad.

>>35691351
>Sabaton memes
Kek

>>35690822
holy fuck are your interactions usually that boring?
>Lol
>Enjoy
>Mhm
>Thnx
>Goodnight

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK

>>35689184
kek originangliolio

>>35691218
Because I'm in my mid 20's and that was the only time in my entire life

Well I'm turning my car on in my garage now. Hopefully there's no afterlife.

>>35690960
Just gf saying she loves me and both of us talking about our day

>>35691414
Oh, nice. Enjoy it while you can.

>>35691320
Girl: R
Faggot: F

R: How cute you do know that i love you right?
R: Can i go to your home?

F: Yes you can come today
F: i don't know what the fuck this message says.
F: Yes my dear i love you so much

R: Cool
R: Wow you really work a lot
R: I'm going to take a nap i love you.

That's all i can translate
Btw it's a pretty shitty conversation.

>>35688660
she probably knows this site but i doubt she lurks
so here is it

goodbye
if you ever wanna talk to me ever again i'll be more than happy.
i should just went to bed when i said i would
then she sends a kiwi pic
8 weeks ago...

>send gril message
>marked as read
>she hasnt replied in an hour
You're dead to me you bitch

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Origamoiur

>>35691649
she seems interested in you

good for you

>>35691649
>using desu outside of 4chan
I also like to live dangerously

>>35691681
She's my wife lel

>>35691084
don't say her name in every sentence man, sounds creepy. But damn i feel bad for you

>>35691705
How did you do it ?

Thus wasn't original btw

>>35691705
Why are you here?

Why is anyone with decent level of social interaction here?

>>35691705
oh neat fuck off of r9k then worthless norman

>>35691728
best memes sorry

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>>35689142
Feels, robro. I also was forced cut contact/blanket block.
I dunno when it gets better.

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>>35691559
>send a message
>gets read
>wait a whole month for a reply
>have to initiate convo AGAIN

>>35691705
How did you meet her?

orgrimmar

Been dating this bitch for 2 months. Asked if we were still seeing us on friday two weeks ago.

-I don't know- she said...

I didn't replied and neither she tried to reach out at me. Haven't talk to her since March 10th.

>feelsbadman.jpg

>>35691727
I was interested in her and took the time to get to know her. She's also a good woman and not a fucking slut roastie so it was an easy choice

>>35691779
High school
Smiggles

"Great I was wondering about that. Thank him. And thank you."

My mother, after I told her my uncle helped install some cabinets at my great aunt's new place.
The last time I received a message from a girl who wasn't my mother or sister was about 9 months ago, from a former teacher. The last time I received a message from a female friend or girlfriend was never.

>>35689036

Move her on to meth eventually by telling her it's just a modified version of it or whatever and it will help with studying or whatever and then you can rape her like you obviously want to

>>35688660
Did you mean "female human being (male)"?

>>35689184

Snapchat is just an attention thing, it's not sexual except for ultra chads.

It sounds like she wants you to invite her to do something at the end of the week hence the
>HEY ANON BY THE WAY I'M FREE WINK WINK MAYBE YOU SHOULD INVITE ME WINK WINK

>>35691882
nah, she was taking some caffeine pills I lol'd and told her I could get her something better, very trusting of her.

A message in spic that said "okay, sorry for everything. i won't bother you anymore. Have a nice day"

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I miss her everyday that passes I was a fool.
5 other girls msg'd me and I left them all on read
she knows my fb password hopefully one day she logs on and sees that I'm a loner and i need her back

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>>35690138

'i wish i could've gotten you something but i couldn't so you'll just have to accept my love as a gift'

jesus autism christ man, it's not the medieval times.

then again she also responded like a stroke victim so I guess you both deserve eachother.

>>35689413
text her you idiot

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Originally chadpost

>>35690422
>woman acting like a man
Absolutely and infinitely disgusting.

>>35690914
There are billions of your degenerate kind out there, wtf do you mean you're glad?
This place is infested for years with your kind too.

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>>35691084
>you deserve every good thing that happens
I WILL FUCKING GAS YOU, YOU FILTHY PIECE OF WHITE KNIGHT SHIT STAIN REEEEEEEEE

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This is my lady friend

>>35691010
>>35691084
I have the exact same problem with a girl who has the exact same name this is pretty depressing to read

>>35693620
Nice orbiting faggot

Get some fucking pride

>>35693673
What the fuck does orbiting mean?

>>35689077
You seem insecure, man. If you were happy with your life you wouldnt behave like this.

>>35693620
comfy
i will never have a friend like this fuck me atleast you made me smile

>>35689142

Kek that first fucking text, dude as if she had any genuine intention of being your friend by starting out like that out of no where.

Just cut contact with her, all she wants to know is that you're still there and that you still can't help replying to her.

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>>35689184
Holy shit you talk like the biggest weeb faggot I've ever heard. Supreme gentleman in the making right here!

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Someone give me some pointers??

>>35690077
It is. We've been together for a few months now.

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>>35691559
>send friend message
>they don't click on so they can pretend that they haven't seen it and don't have to respond.

>>35693877
"You like food"

>>35693877
"Well, you look like a smart girl ;)"

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She just stopped talking to me
>feelsbadman.jpg

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Discussing manager replacements. So mundane, I know

>>35693877
"You're obviously a whore."

>>35688942
Tell her that you're not giving your v card to a slut but that you'd be down for a bj and her teaching you the art of manhandling.

also take a condom cause you probably won't resist.

faggot

>>35694006

Cause it was boring conversation, gotta realise that Tinder is a contest of words, ALWAYS BE CLOSING

>>35694245
How do I close, master? She sent the first message and sent two texts each time

>>35690180
He's on /r9k/ it's already assumed no woman would want to fuck him. Otherwise he wouldn't be here.

>>35694360

I don't actually know. I live in a regional sort of town obsessed with Facebook groups for men and women only that are essentially screenshot dumps of Tinder convos, I know like 13 girls who are subbed to such groups and so I don't dare to be sexually direct in anyway, which means I also never close. But it is the aim of the game, like fishing I suppose, each msg should be a lure because if it's not they just won't reply.

>>35694595
Guess next time instead of just answering questions, I'll go for the kill instead of waiting 3 days

>>35688660

no screenshot because it was on Snapchat but it was

'so you like a girl that speaks Spanish babe'

Was there a specific event that turned this place into Chad9k?

My last chat with a "female" was some catfish on omegle. Does that count?

>>35690350
Never apologize to a woman for anything.
They prefer when you don't respond for a long time. Even if they ever say otherwise

>>35693877
You look like a fucking roastie reeeeeeeeeeeeee

>>35689406
Don't apologize and don't ask

>>35689413
Don't spread your loser shit on others, you should look like everything is easy for you

>>35689413
Are you the main character of an anime perhaps?

>>35690138
Never tell a girl you love her FIRST

My little sister asked me if I wanted her to drop off food for me on her way home from work.

She's bringing me a burger and a milkshake.

>>35688915
wtf is going on here
eggsplain

Fucking hell, reading your chats are PAIN

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>>35689413
I know this feel, anon. Don't worry, it'll get easier to deal with not having people in your life.

>>35689039
What does it mean if I'm getting the kissy emoji and hearts from a girl if we're not dating? Nothing, I wager

>>35691407
no man

fucjkk p
Dont do that bro

>>35695493
Define dating

>>35691084
>meme
>gif of a dog and a cat
fucking normies

>>35693877
"You're hot." Might work

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ladies and gentlemen, my wife

>>35695513
>define dating
What did he mean by this?

A picture of her under her covers looking very comfy. Why won't she come be comfy with me?

>>35693877
that you're very attractive

ez

>>35695712
fuck, you got a real keeper man. congrats.

my wife!!! borat voice xD

I haven't gotten a text from a woman in more than 2,5 years, and it was work related too.

>>35690611
is that cm/mb? i think i recognize her writing

if so, fuck this gay earth

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>>35695712
>she's dreaming of dreadlocks
B L A C K E D

>>35691683
It's pretty effective on girls who browse 4chan, least the ones I talk to.

>>35690138
>lucktastic
I feel you mate, I could really use that money

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She was talking about an autistic kid being alone most of the time at school

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My sister sends me pictures of pretty much every dog she sees

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>>35697464
>tfw no qt sister who sends qt doggo pics to me all the time

Phone can't screenshot I'll write it down

Me: plz don't tell her, she will probs call the cops

Her: I'm telling her and shut up she won't call the cops but you probs won't be able to come back here. I can't believe you stole her fucking vicodins

Me: :( no one was awake, my head felt like it was about to explode, and its not my fault you n ur mom don't even have ibuprofen in the fucking house.

Her: idc about your reasons, you still stole drugs from my mom, I want to cry. I fucking HATE YOU you always do stupid shit like this alwayyssss

Me: look, I'm sorry I took them, there were only like 5 of them and I only took them cuz I was in misery and I can replace them in a few weeks just have my back and say u took them for your knee :( plz

Her: NO. I'm not getting caught up in your stupid shit, its not okay to steal from ppl just cuz you can replace it soon. You have a problem like every month I find out some stupid shady ahit u do and I'm tired of it
Yep, I fucked up. Writing a reply now lol.

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im really not happy in this relationship but shes all ive got

>>35695303
Holy FUCK this is good advice

>>35689413
Wow. She sounds really interested in you. You should make a move.

"Fucking hilarious I love you so fucking much"

What does it mean /r9k/?

>>35697789
Fuckin own up shitcunt

>>35697789
you're trash

try suicide, seriously, or just start using meth already so you can die quicker

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This girl online I talk to like once or twice a month. We've known each other for 3 years now.

Wish we could talk more, but she never messages me and I don't want to seem annoying by messaging her a lot.

>last conversation with a female

Aaannddd it's my mom

"Did you walk the dog"
"Yes"
"Ok nice"

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I don't have a female to talk to...

She sent me a video of a girl shitting in a parking lot then getting kicked literally in the ass by a man in a dress

>>35698204
Get a job. I have my female boss texting me all the time

Alternatively start texting your mom/sister

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Yes that is Calculus

>>35690180
But we already fucked...she enjoyed it and wanted more later I thought.

Maybe yours right though

>>35697789
Me: yeah, I fucked up. Don't tell her tho, I'll come over tomorrow and talk to her myself. I'm really sorry. I regretted it after I popped them n immediately thought oh great more drama. Fuck. I was just asking u to keep it on the down low cuz your mom is gonna lose her shit at you now for having a crazy bf. Goddamn I'm sorry

Her: yeah I really didn't want to deal with this right now. Idk, if you're actually gonna tell her yourself she probs won't yell at me but you fucked up and I'm not forgiving you this time :(

Me: understandable. I'm not going to hold anything against you if u wanna not see each other anymore or whatever, I just didn't want our weekend alone for once to be ruined by a friggin ear infection.

Her: I don't want to break up :(

Me: ?? Its probably not good to have me in ur life always being a dumb ass. You're always giving me shit for not have impulse control.

Her: I know, but besides always trying to do drugs and even stealing them from my family you're still the only person I like on earth. You're the most realistic smartest person I know.... But damn u got get over this problem of yours

Me: I've been doing good, it was just the perfect storm, I'm in pain, no one is around and painkillers staring me in the face. Kinda fucked up situation for me to be in t.t

Me: I'll make it up to u somehow, idk help me come up with a plan and a way to track my drug use and stuff. If you're involved ill be more motivated

Her: okay but you have to be honest w me. I don't care if u mess up along the way just don't hide things from me

Me: lol... I feel guilty not leaving you, you could do wayyyy better

>>35697331
Which Uni?
East Coast of America?

>>35690611
>not replying with "fag"

>>35690138
>Not saying "I really don't care about your boyfriend, I only care about you"

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Nothing special but she did tell me in person she was thinking about breaking up with her boyfriend so I told her to let me know when she does so I could ask her out. She preceded to act like me asking her out would be a bad idea.

So apparently she isnt into me at all I guess and now I just feel like dieing. She also found out recently Im still a virgin and made fun of me for it. When will my light be snuffed out?

>>35699236
she's so full of shit. jimmy johns never is that slow. either she's lying or she's a notoriously awful tipper. either way stay away

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>>35688660
My ex was so unique and different!!! How will I find another one like her?

:(

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Just a snippet of the convo

>>35699891
Yeah she was gone for like 45 minutes so you might be right about being a bad tipper.

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Originallly orginal

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Not really special but I had taken the girl out for several dates a couple years ago but it fell flat.
I got this message and then proceeded to sperg out on 200 word essay replies, we did agree we should catch up but i'm afraid of things repeating itself.

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No one would get this without the context but yeah. He's my best friend and basically the only person I text

>>35688660
>texts women

GET THE FUCK OUT OF THIS BOARD YOU GOD DAMN FUCKING NORMIES BACK TO FUCKING PLEBBIT YOU GO YOU FUCKING AUTISTS

GO TO /B/ AND FUCKING HANG YOURSELF YOU FUCKING TOXIC CANCER NIGGERS

>>35700720
FUCK didn't even see that it said female but I'm female lmao

>>35700763
>andrew
huh, sure

>>35700843
Andrew is the name of my friend idk what you're trying to say

>>35700899
IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE THINGS A FEMALE TEXTED YOU REEEEEEEEEE NOT SOME FUCKER NAMED ANDREW

>>35700923
I know I realized that after posting. I've seen other threads on r9k where people post screenshots of the last PERSON they've talked to and I assumed that's what this is without reading because I'm sleep deprived as shit

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She's a model/Suicide Girl.
Got with her once (didn't sleep with her)... but I was obsessed with her in college.
She wanted to see me over the past weekend but I have a rash on my face currently and I didn't want her to see me with that shit on my face.

We used to sit in her car for hours and hours on end listening to music and talking.

>>35700986
god women are so fucking retarded

jesus FUCKING christ

The last thing was from my mom and it was god related 9 days ago
From other female that isnt related to me never got nothing
Weeeeeee kill me pls

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Hola senorityaa

>>35688660
>slut oven
>baby batter
please be joking

>>35701057
SG name?

>>35700722
Your reaction is the reason I made this thread.

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This is the least cringey part of this conversation. I'll follow it up with the most cringey part.

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>>35701477
I long abandoned the prospect of ever sleeping with this girl but I think I may have pushed it a bit here.

>>35701477
>this is the LEAST cringey part

lmao buckle up this gonna be good

i won't post the screenshot because i don't know how to do that. she is my downstairs neighbor and a super cutie. i made cookies and invited her to try some. we hung out for 15-20 min or so and talked about art and what we are doing with our lives. we'll be hanging out again later this week.

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>>35701398
No idea.
Never bothered to check or ask.
She had a few clothed pictures on Facebook at one point from one of her shoots... that's the only reason why I know she's a Suicide Girl.
She's insanely fucking hot though.
Picture very much related.

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>>35688660
The only one I have is from my mom.
I don't talk to people very much in general; never mind girls.

>>35690914
Argenfag? Veo un compatriota. Fuck son todos normie aca en Arg hasta los supuestos """"robots"""

>>35691841
>ywn marry your high school sweet heart and live happily ever after

>>35701514
Yup you pretty much fucked it up, forever. Congrats. That picture sealed the dead for eternity. Welcome to the wizard world. Faggot

>>35696220

Hahahaha fuck why was that so fucking funny

>>35702092
Her response was just "Ooo". I'm not gonna message back.

Backstory: I'm clingy as fuck and told my ldr gf I had forgot to do my laundry because I was laying in bed and thinking about her

GF: I'm sorry I'm distracting youuuu
Is it bad that that makes me feel good though

Me: i got my laundry and shit done
nah you should feel good

GF: <3 <3 <3

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>>35690165
>SENTANCE

>>35692932
Why break up with her Chris?

>>35691778
Get a clue desu senpai.

>>35692932
Chris, you have a us flag on your phone. You are clingy and needy. Stop it Chris.

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>Hi Anon since you're covering my Saturday dinner shift, if there's any shift you need covered next week let me know!

>>35701514
>girls like swords, right?

>>35700508
>piggy
lmao end yourself

>>35689413
don't be such a loser dude, tell her what's up

>tfw bf didn't post itt
>not sure if relieved or disappointed
if you're here check your skype

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Her: okay
Her: I don't know how well I'll be able to do it though
Her: >1 am
Her: I'm going to sleep
Me: goodnight
Me: looking forward to videochatting with you
Me: goodnight my little camgirl slut
Me: (lewd enough now?)
Her: no
Her: still not lewd enough
Her: : ^ )
Her: cya tomorrow
Me: ill make it up to you 2morrow
Me: don't worry

>Have weird relationship with a female friend where we call each other baby and love and stuff
>Have tried to date her in the past but she always flakes and is clearly not interested
>Catching feelings for her pretty hard though
>Don't want to lose her because then I'd be literally all alone (she's out of state)
>At the same time I resent the fuck out of her for playing with my emotions
What the fuck do I do lads

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>>35704580
originally rape her

>>35704608
Ok I kekd but does anyone have non meme advice

>>35700079
She won this conversation jsyk

>>35704553
>still not lewd enough
Damn nigga

>>35704763
Just say fuck it and be totally honest with her. Ask how she feels, if she wants to date cool but be careful, and if she doesn't and wants to basically keep leading you on, break it off as nice as you can. That constant longing in your life is never good for you.

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>>35690239
Charge your battery, and stop talking to this cunt.
It must be tiring, isn't it tiring?

>>35704883
We've been friends for over a year and I've felt this way almost the entire time. She know it, too. Something's gotta give eventually. But the fear of being alone makes me put up with her manipulative bullshit. Halp me.

>>35698642
>youre shit.

from a legit female.

>>35704913
this is why women need to be eradicated.

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About 15 minutes ago

This is an original post

>>35705006
Stick to shitting up one thread, normalfag.

>>35704913
Just fucking get over it and straight up ask her out or just end it. Being alone is better than being manipulated. And if you're stuck on this girl and meet some other girl that would actually be good for you, you'll still be hung on this one. It's just an overall bad situation that you should bring to an end. Trust me, I've been there, done that. Had a crush on this girl for three years and did the same thing you are. I asked her out and told her how I felt about her and she just kept leading me on. I eventually just broke it off. Hurt for a while, but worked out in the long run. Now I'm with my current girlfriend, and she's 500x better for me than that bitch ever was.

>>35705006

so ask urself why you dont want to put work into this relationship. she's right, every fucking long-lasting relationship takes work, and ur iq is sub-70 if you don't relize that.


if ur not a clinical retard, ask yourself: what do you want from a partner? what do you want from a partner that a FRIEND could provide, just as well, OR better? what person would you want to be with? do you think YOU are good enough to obtain, and keep, someone like that?

>>35705084
I agree with you. Just tough to take that leap. There is a qt in one of my classes so I might just go for her.

>>35697790
i'm on the same boat. Feels weird, man.

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This slut only caring about the dick.

>>35705148
It's tough, but it's worth it.

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from my girlfriend, i swear we're like an old married couple sometimes

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Things did not exactly go as planned.

>>35701514
welcome to dark souls, ser dumbass of catarina

>>35706271
Ouch. Fire back.

>>35706437
Nah, they already blocked me. Probably for the best though, they weren't exactly the most caring of people.

>>35706515
Fair enough. I'd still find some way to get at them that they haven't blocked you on yet and throw down some bantz.

You guys actually have phone numbers belonging to girls.
That's sixteen-and-a-half step further than I am.

On the plus side I don't have to fear anything when I get ridiculously drunk on a tuesday.

>>35698642
If men could be roasties, you'd be the posterboy

>Met a chick over video games.
>She said she wants me to take her from behind, and smack her ass with a belt.
>She's a blue eyes blond hair German.
Goodbye /r9k/.

>>35706665
>wants me to take her from behind and smack her ass with a belt
Why stop there?

Nice thinly veiled brag thread OP

I haven't spoken to anyone who isn't a family member in nearly a year, would have been longer but I was admitted to a psych ward last year.

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>>35688660
FUCKING ROBOTS YOU TOLD ME TO JUST BEE MYSELF, THIS SHIT HAPPENS EVERY TIME I LISTEN TO YOUR ADVICE REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

>>35706753
Sorry robito, I was just making a summary that I can't believe I am about to get laid.

>>35695712
nathan wtf you leave insta but post this shit on r9k

>>35706857
whew i can't tell if she's joking or not but that is awful

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>>35693078
>I'd still rape you desu
Nice

>>35697790
Kinda same, I even call her princess. Not that I'm not happy, we've just been togeather for three years and she wants to move half way across the country with what little I have and leave everyone I know behind. Not sure if I want to be part of that and some of her personality traits have really been grinding on me lately. Not sure if I want her to be the mother of my children one day.

>>35688687
Is it me? C:

>>35689413
Ask yourself: would you want to interact with someone who talks the way you do?

>>35693877
'That you're absolutely gorgeous ;)'

It's boring, but it probably will work.

>>35706857
>being yourself ever

Its like you want to fail

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>>35688660
>last text a female human has sent to you
>last
>implying I got a text from a female

Fucking normies

>>35708098
no mom? no sister? no boss? no girl to do a group project? no welfare lady? no unemployment lady?

there's got to be one, jesus tells me so. you fibber

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Pic related. Got it right after clicking this thread.

>>35708125
No

Original oregano oregon

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This was from my sister August last year. I never did see her on Skype haha

>>35693834
>this thread still up

I'm a middle class bong. Excuse me elocution. We really talk like that.

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normie and dutch reporting

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I miss her lots, I'm at uni in the other side of the country and she's been in the netherlands taking further a levels

>>35708369
You mean she's in the Netherlands getting dicked by foreigners

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>>35688942
She probably gives a mean gobbie

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some roastie from work. she added me on fb, then on insta the day after so i sent this.

dubs decides my response (work ends soon so idc what happens)

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>>35689184
From a girl I met 5 years ago in Laos.

>>35708375
>tfw that actually happened
She was seduced by some italian fuckboy who then dumped her after taking her virginity. I'm not in a relationship with her or anything but fuck me it hurt when she told me

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>>35688660
>Tfw no bf to say this to me
>Tfw not twinkish enough for men to desire me
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

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Surprisingly not that bad.

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>>35689413
>being this much of a fag

Why is it always the people that don't want to be helped that have people that care for them ?

>>35708410
That's why I said what I did. Don't go full on MGTOW but keep in mind that women are mentally children their whole lives; most don't give a flying fuck about anyone but themselves. You've probably heard this already but you need to distance yourself from her dude. There are billions of women and easily replaceable. Keep her on the sidelines if she wants to fuck or something but keep your feels in check.

>>35708434
I'm wondering the same thing too. I went from being a recluse with suicidal thoughts to having a decent job and my own apartment but I still haven't found someone that would care for me like this.

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>>35708487
Don't worry man I'm not hung up on her at all. Uni's been perfect for me, meeting such a massive pool of people helps you realise that no-one is really special, you just get to know certain people and assume no-one else is like them. Especially coming from a small town like I have.

>>35689413
>I'll probably lose her like I've lost everyone else

Then why don't you try to make an effort if you know where this is going ? What the fuck are you doing you dumb nigger ? You got someone who visibly cares about you and you realize it yet you prefer to post the screencap on a Mongolian mural painting smoke signal board rather than try to salvage this and be a better man ?
Don't give me that you're depressed bullshit, you will FOREVER be depressed if you don't try to help yourself, you already got at least one person one this godforsaken earth that cares which is more than most people on this board will ever have but you continue being a mopy sack of shit.

>>35708580
Glad to hear your story has a decent ending then. Good luck in the future, anon