Tell the story of your first time drunk.

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>>35677935
>tfw two intelligent too drink alcohol

>>35677935

I was at a friend's mansion when I was 14. His dad didn't care that he swiped liquor from the minibar all the time because he was so busy with his businesses. I had three rum and cokes and laughed my ass off at some movie, I forget which.

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>>35677967
>TFW too autistic to have friends to drink with so you blame it on being "too smart"

I honestly can't remember. But I do remember the first time I smoked weed.

>>35677972
Your friend has a mansion?

>>35678064

Wasn't too uncommon in northern Virginia. Land was cheap and wealth was aplenty. They're still hicks, just rich hicks.

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>>35678028
That's not it. I just hate not being in control.

>>35677935
>9yr old
>new yrs
>pissed up on weak cider
>run around house laughing with sister
>lololololololololololololol

>17
>huge sperg, straight edge more or less at this point
>dad gone to china to meet expensive prostitute for the weekend
>Very Old Barton in the freezer
>(online)friend is like do it senpai
>I drink it
>it's disgusting
>I get really loose in my chair my vision starts to double
>whiskey doesn't taste bad anymore at this point
>rather it tastes bad but I do not react to it
>half the more or less fifth is gone at this point and I eat pizza

cont'd next post

>>35677935

I was 16, in a 19+ yo party in one of the guys' house. There was this 21 yo girl, who was beautiful, and I couldn't believe she was actually chatting with me, to the point where I felt I could get somewhere with her. Started drinking because I felt I was going to look older and more interesting, but after a while she went to "sleep" with some guy in the room. I said "fuck it" and drink half a bottle of melon liqueur + sprite. Everything was like moving, and I was feeling like I had more energy than usual, so I became an alcoholic instantly. Now, 8 years later, I work in a bar, can drink anything I want and I fucking love my job.

Thanks for destroying my life, you miserable bitch. I hope you got pregnant and had down syndrome twins. The violent ones, not those crappy retards that want to be someone in life. Fuck you.

>>35678133

>wake up literally hours later
>strange dream of me sitting in the bathroom floor throwing up pizza and whiskey violently
>as I turn in my bed I notice my CRT monitor is literally on the pillow adjacent to my head
>as I sit up I notice my desk is broken in half like I karate chopped that shit
>keyboard is on the ground in pieces next to the now empty fifth of Very Old Barton
>I leave room and head to kitchen and see I flipped the kitchen table over, the rocking chair, as well some other smaller furniture
>my blackberry is on the floor in pieces
>my glasses are on the floor in pieces
>fuck it can't deal with this I gotta piss

cont'd next post

>At a bar after finals
>Kept drinking because there was nothing to live for
>Realize how much alcohol I can take and keep going
>Texting my oneitis the entire time, friends from classes are seeing how drunk I am
>One of the girls in my class who asked me out a few weeks before (I turned her down twice) was trying to make me jealous with some other random guy there
>Drunk me tells them to go for it, good for them. Girl gets pissed
>After bar closes, literally run home over a mile while drunk because it's freezing
>Get back to apartment, call oneitis and ramble about stupid shit for like 2 hours at 3am
>She's my gf now and that night was a major contributor to that happening

Took a stupid amount of shots and was pretty much just stumbling around the whole time, I remember throwing up between the owner of the houses couch cushions though and other people puking

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>>35677935
I was 13 on a carnival cruise ship to the Bahamas and a 19-year old girl raped me while whispering awful racial slurs about me being her nigger slave in my ear and then convinced me to fuck her transexual little "sister" but I didn't know it was her sister because I was so drunk.

As you might imagine, I have some problems with intimacy. Also with traps. And women. And really, people. I don't trust them. I just drink alone now.

>17
>college house party
>fucking waavy I'm in college whoooaa

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>>35677935
Fairly recently actually. My friends invited me over, did three shots of Fireball, and I tried out Edgar Allan Poe's adage "Write Drunk, Edit Sober" in two ways: One was drunk texting a girl I liked (pic related), and the other was trying to write a script for a lightsaber fight that I'm trying to shoot with a friend (see here: https://drive.google.com/open?id=0B6uwaxNQt5HRSnEwdUdvc3BpSkk )

>>35678244
*but I didn't know it was actually her brother

Apologies. I'm drunk now. Filled a solo cup up with Bacardi and coke then worked my way through a six-pack of some brown belgian beer

my ears are ringing

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I am 21 and have never been drunk in my life, the most alcohol I've ever had
Was a small glass of champagne. And to make it even worse, I live in the U.S

>>35678199

>head to bathroom which i actually passed to make it to the kitchen
>the door is shut despite me being home alone
>open door
>before it's open all the way I immediately hit with a foul stench none like I have smelt before this point
>chunks of pizza throw up all on the ground
>near the toilet
>on the floor vent
>i_fucked_up.jpg
>use other bathroom sober up a little bit and eventually scrape the chunks off the ground and dispose of it
>don't want to scrub floor and am 17 anyway and a retard
>i grab some bleach and bleach the fuck out of the entire bathroom floor
>it goes down vent
>makes it 2nd bathroom hits one of the toilet rugs which are black
>mop the shit up and my sister bought me a fifth to replace his and he never found out

I've had worse drinking sessions than this now being 24 but I seemed to have put the bottle down for now and have not drank in a year.

>>35678267
You really need to drink bro. It makes things feel better. You forget everything. Whether it's mom cracking your ribcage or you putting your dick into "Amy"s butt, alcohol makes it all better.

>>35678273
You should seriously reconsider ever drinking again.

>>35678290
My mother has never cracked my ribcage nor have I stuck my penis in anyone's butt. Drinking is a normie activity.

>>35678332
DUDE. You need to try both. It's wonderful. Mommy will hug you and say that she'll buy you whatever you want for your birthday if you tell the doctors that you tripped playing street football.

Also, penis in butt? Phenomenal. So tight. Even if it did turn out to be a dude....I took some stupid white boi trap's virginity. How disgusting. Although it felt great!

>>35678273
What the fuck did you do with the table and such?

>>35678257
The way you're writing there is like textbook "Drunk guy trying to write sober" with how grammatically well it is and the words you use and such. Unless that's just how you write.