Memories that make you cringe every time you remember them.

>>35601242
one timei called myteecher mom LOL

wrote love letters to a girl 10 years younger than me
LMAO

>High school
>Wore jorts almost every day
>Found out jorts aren't cool after I graduated
>I've probably been referenced in one of those "That Kid" threads

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>>35601323
You were
origiiii

>>35601242
> be 6 year old me
> grandpa telling stories of how he needed to kill puppies as a kid because they were poor
> fast forward 2 years
> grandpa teaching me how to hold a rifle
> i point it at my cat
> entire family starts yelling at me
> i say i was "gonna pull a grampy"
> grandpa starts tearing up, has a flashback
> mother begins to cry
> i was never allowed to touch a gun again

>>35601242
Being a cringy fedora tipper

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>be me
>7th grade
>Going out with 7/10 black girl
>Buy her shit every day
>Cookies, milk, stupid middle school shit
>Albino cunt comes along and steals her from me
>Have an idea
> "It was all my plan, you used to be racist, so I wanted to get you to go out with a black girl"
>Acted like I had made up my entire personality up until that point just for to try to make it seem like it actually was my plan
>Didn't work
>Went on long ass Campaign to get her back
>Unironically wore a fedora
>Unironically said "I'll treat you right this time, come back into my loving arms m'lady
>Mfw she married him and I haven't had a girlfriend since

I'm 35 now, should I just be an hero at this point?

>>35601407
Oh god that made me KEK

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>>35601444
At least you made an attempt robobro

>>35601242
>Memories that make you cringe every time you remember them
Too many to fucking count

Highlights include:
>Bad mouthing America while talking to a marine twice
>Yelling at a random guy and asking him if I looked like a kid, voice even sounded more autist than usual
>Numerous romantic failures
>Being beta, emotional and overly sincere in general

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It's really hard to recount them here because they require too much context and aren't that interesting or funny, but I have so many of these and I'm constantly cranking out new ones such that I'm swearing at myself and clawing at my face all day long when I remember them and I think nobody can see or hear me. If I realized that anybody caught me doing this, it would just become another one.

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>>35601407
>> i say i was "gonna pull a grampy"
Mein siedes

>>35601242
> In middle school, looking through yearbook
> Trying hard to be the class clown
> Point out a kid who has his eyes closed in his yearbook pic
> "Haha look at that retard"
> "Anon, that kid is blind"
> Everyone gave me the death stare for the rest of the year

>>35601444

Reminded me of a story

>Middle school
>There was this girl my parents made me play tennis with
>For some reason, 12-year-old me thought it would be a good idea to tell people I'm going out with her because tennis is not cool but having a girlfriend is cool
>Word gets back to her and she's like what the fuck are you talking about
>Everyone knows I'm a girlfriendless loser who plays tennis
>Forced to watch as more popular guys date her until the end of high school

There's a happy ending though. She was in medical school but got BLACKED and had to drop out so she could be a single mother. Should have played along, bitch

If I actually try to remember the moments that keep me up at night I never can. Some are worse than others. Let's see though.

>I once said "I need more dick" instead of "need more dip" at a party. A lot of people heard.

>Threatened to kill my father when he came to my bar drunk and he wouldn't admit to cheating on my mom.

>a girl once put my hand on her tit at a game of beer pong to 'psyche out' the other team. I didn't pick up on that signal and never got to do anything with her.

>I let my best friend (male) suck my cock. Twice.

>drunk texts like crazy. I told a good friend of mine we need to have one more party and then I'm killing myself

>told my mother I'm going to kill myself if i don't quit my job. NEET for 8 months. Just got a month long job at a fucking carnival.

>lots of missed family birthdays because I was drunk/hungover.

>intentionally skip a big birthday party of my own that my mother threw because the amount of people coming gave me bad anxiety. I got drunk by myself in a roach motel.

>called my only real girlfriend 'annoying' when she was nagging me about something and knew right then and there we were done. She was pregnant, but had an abortion.

>failed a year of fucking community college when a friend died. That's when my alcoholism started getting bad.

>and many, many lost romantic opportunites because I'm bad at picking up on social queues or taking initiative. At 25 I'm starting to get better, but I'm always going to be a failed normie.

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>>35601848
Did you know your best friend was gay or did he ask you out of the blue?

>>35602602
Nah he was dating a girl for over a year at the time. They're still together. I don't think he's full gay as much as bi-curious.

>>35601492
The fact that that happened twice amazes me.

>>35601492
>Bad mouthing America while talking to a marine

What's wrong with that? I used to have a job where a lot of my coworkers were ex-Marines or other military and they had nothing good to say about the country they fought for. Not the government, at least.

>talking to grill in algebra class
>she asks me what I'm doing after school that same day
>she wants help "studying" at her place
>Say I'm not busy, but I tell her I'm not comfortable going
>she gets visibly upset and asks why
>mfw

>in college 1st year
>grill in math class who liked me from orientation gives lots of hints
>eventually puts her fucking head on my shoulder once
>I tense up and sperg out in silence

>trying to meet people by joining the spic club in my high school
>grill barely knows me and asks for my phone
>puts her number in my phone and starts texting me during the class meeting
>I reply, but push her away by being distant

I blame the years of bullying and isolation that made me tense desu, still an autismo khv

I have several
>2013
>Worked with two girls In psych class
>One was cute and friendly and I only wanted to be friends (she was married)
>Only got a pity friendship

>2012
>Girl shows interest in me in one English class
>Thought she was being straight forward about the class in one of her many inquiries
>Didn't hit me till a year and a half later

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> Tried redpilling my parents about how Hitler was a good leader.

> Tell me he was an awful guy or whatever normalfags say

> Kept insisting his agenda doesn't matter, he led well.

> Get grounded

It's been three years and I think about it almost every night.

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>2011
>in high school
>became a ponyfag
>preached it to everyone I knew
>cute girl decides to approach me
>I start talking to her about it and how its more than a show for little girls
>she makes an excuse to walk away

Luckily I had degenerate friends who didn't mind it but I still hate myself for ruining that chance. Glad I left that autism when I graduated but it still hurts to think about.

>2014
>10th grade
>Go to a combined middle school/high school with sis (8th grader)
>Have to wait an hour after school to be picked up with her
>Stay in math teacher's room
>get a smartphone
>Listen to music on headphones and dance to it
>Did this +10 times
>Too autistic to realize that 20+ people were staring at me every time
>my nickname was "dancing boy"

The only reason I stopped was because my headphones broke.

Didn't realize how autistic I was until a good year later.

>4th grade
>we had to copy some stuff off the board and work it out ourselves
>I couldn't see the board because I didn't wear my glasses because I was self-conscious
>I was looking at the paper of a girl next to me
>she looks over at me( not in a suspicious way or anything she just glances over at me
>it caught me off guard since I was trying to be sneaky so I say unintentionally said
>"I'm not copying off you!"
>she gives me an angry look and moves her paper away from me
>I don't know why I said anything

>>35601242
>2005.
>first year in community college
>print a pic of a photoshop of Avril Lavigne with a dildo
>printer doesn't work.
>tutor comes in, fixes printer and it prints off.
Pretty sure he knew it was me because you can check this shit. Never said anything though.

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alright i remember one

>me in middle school
>funny but autistic as fuck
>didn't know how to talk to girls
>girl approaches me and says she wants to be my gf
>"ooh cool yeah sure"
>we "are gf & bf"
>never hang out with her, like, ever
>some days pass
>"hey anon, aren't you my bf?"
>"yeah i am haha"
>stops talking to me
>mfw i didn't even know what being bf/gf meant and lost my chance of having a middle school romance shit

>>35601611
Well at least the blind kid didn't give you the death stare

>>35601611
Gotta love how retarded the human mind is
>you mean anon didn't know anon is blind
>this is unacceptable
>it doesn't matter that you didn't know this anon, you should have known, therefore you are intentionally trying to hurt this blind kid's feelings
>let us ostracize anon, because he willingly and wittingly targeted a blind kid to make him feel bad
If I could build a machine to show normals how stupid they are, I would not. I am content to let them stew in their own retardation and hope they all get fucked over by it to some capacity.

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>be me, 13
>i was really into the lonely island
>my fav song was the 3way one mostly because of the helicopter dick part
>out of the shower one night
>get back into my room with the song stuck in my head
>fav part comes along
>helicopter my dick while mouthing the words
>didn't notice my mom sitting on my bed a foot away from me
>she's speechless, giggling
>"a-anon?"
>ohfuck.jpg
>"m-mom i didn't see you!"
>she's still laughing
>"you can never tell anyone"
>"ok honey" she says still giggling
>weird looks from family after that
>I knew she would tell since she's a huge gossip
>haven't listened to the song since

>Watching a documentary cartoon on slavery in 5th grade
>laugh whenever the slaves got whipped
I'm not even white

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just today I was about to lose my virginity
I was fingering a girl i only kinda knew, and she was gonna let me hit it but I couldn't get hard for some fucking reason. I wasn't eve nervous or anything.
I told her my mom was coming home and that she needs to leave
>"o-ok, anon. s-see ya"

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Not nearly as bad as some others but I feel physically ill every time I remember it.
>high school
>in orchestra, cellist
>at final concert lots of students there from the school and other schools
>I could probably say in the triple digits
>see a friend of mine in the audience
>sit back and prep my music while soloists get up and ready
>suddenly hear, "I love you, Liam!"
>assume it's my friend, not gay shit just more of a supportive audience type gesture
>look up grinning and my retarded mouth blurts out, "I love me, too!"
>silence, except for shocked friend chucklegasping
>look around
>soloist named LIA, staring at me
>wasn't my friend calling out my name, an audience member congratulating Lia.
>can hear my other orchestra members whispering, "what the fuck was that" and looking at me
>see director from offstage giving me a death stare and shaking his head very slowly
>managed to humiliate myself and orchestra in front of over a hundred people I saw every day before the concert even fuckin started
Don't love myself anymore, that's for sure

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>be 11
>6th grade
>first quarter
>be told that we have a test where we name countries
>k
>week later
>"Alright class im gonna hand out the tests"
> ohshit.
>didnt study
>sit there staring at test
>start crying
>everyone staring
>teacher comes up and takes me outside
>get told I can take the test tomorrow
>become beta fag for rest of mid school and known for tears
>still repress

>>35607218
Only used my name because it's hard to explain how similar me and the soloist's names are. Don't cyberape me, robots

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>"confessed" my love for a girl in 10th grade
>she says she likes another guy
>she streams corpse party (i believe)
>one of her friends talks about fucking her, wrecking that ass
>get emotional because I think she chose this douche over me
>this is just one of her girl friends she's joking around with
>she takes it very personally and we don't talk for a few weeks

I've probably got much worse but eh

If I could list all of the terribly mortifying public experiences I've had in the past 10 years now ITT, this thread would go over the post limit.

My life is like an extremely long blooper reel with the benny hill theme playing in the background, yet the more you watch it the more sadder and cringeworthy it gets.

>>35607218
As a Liam, can confirm that this is a common phenomena and it's annoying whenever it happens.

>Soph year of HS
>Moving to a different state
>Girl at church liked me as a rebound because of her breakup
>Didn't care, I liked the cuddles
>Decided to kiss her cheek on the last night I went there
>Went in for a quick peck
>Didn't even touch her cheek
>She pulled away, not knowing what happened
It looked like I just leaned in or something, but it was , and felt, fucking embarrassing.

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>be ages 15-16
>unironically wore a fedora, cargo shorts, button up shirts every day
>Told a girl that I wanted her to break my dick in half and other weird shit
>held door open, acted like a "gentleman", wouldn't shut up about anime
>stopped talking with me after that

>>35601407
Lmao this makes me feel better about my cringey memories

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>>35606703
>haha! look at this retard!
Anon's insult and the kids blindness are mutually exclusive. You also imply that anon unintentionally hurts the kids feelings, which is far from true if you actually read the given context you mong

>>35601848
Maybe it's the overuse of alcohol, but some of your antics bear an uncanny resemblance to those of my own. It's genuinely unnerving.

>>35607548
You're the one who can't read
let us look at the factors of the greentext I am talking about
>anon makes fun of a kid for the social faux pas of having their eyes closed during a photo
>anon does not know they kid is blind
>the other kids get mad at anon for making for of a blind kid for being blind
>anon was making fun of the kid blinking during the picture
>anon did not know the kid was blind
>the kids ostracize anon for unwittingly making fun of someone blind
Does it make more sense now "mong"?

>>35606530
In high school my history class watched a documentary about Emmitt Till. He was the black kid who was beaten, wrapped in barbed wire, and drowned with a cotton gin tired around his neck for whistling at a white woman. The narrator tries to underscore the racism around the trial by saying that a common joke was "ain't it like a nigger to go swimming with a cotton gin around his neck?"
I couldn't stop laughing and everyone including the teacher was staring at me.

>7th grade
>friend asks me who I like
>I'm a naive idiot and tell him
>the very next day it somehow got leaked to the biggest piece of shit sociopath fuck in the grade
>of course he proceeds to tell everyone about it very publicly while making sure I'm there to maximize my suffering

but it gets worse

>had never really even talked to this girl, I don't even know why I was into her
>you all know how that goes
>everyone rides my ass constantly about how I need to ask her out
>some other bastard somehow has her number
>gives it to me
>I autistically text her completely out of the blue and say who I am
>then even more autistically ask her out by text
>predictably rejected
>then everyone finds out about it

oh god I want to fucking die when I remember it

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>16 years old
>My cousin (female) called us.
>I have a secret crush on her.
>Calls for about 20 minutes
>Says she's about to leave
>I told her "I love you"
>Family fell quiet
>I told her "Sis told me to tell it to you"
>End call
>Everyone gave me the weird look.

I still cringe about it ti this day. I don't know why.

Happy Ending
She also got a crush on me

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>>35607732
I always laughed at things like that in history class and everyone was always staring at me for it.
The funny part is that I'm black, and most of the people I went to school with were white.
It always made them uncomfortable when I made racist joke and said "nigger" to them.

>>35607686
Haha! Look at this retard trying argue like an autist!

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>>35606530
Iktf

>middle school
>girl likes me
>everyone finds out
>mutual friend pressures me into asking her out
>do it and she says yes
>don't talk to her until I get a letter after school
>it reads something along the lines of "We should talk more :)"
>ok
>spend lunch together and try to get to know eachother
>breaks up with me the next day

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I told my mom I knew what dick tasted like from the man who abused me because I recognized the taste from sucking my own.

>>35601242
>that time I made incessant your mom jokes to kid whose mom died and I didn't know
>that time I pooped my pants in high school
>that time I made "this is sparta" joke and the english teacher said he appreciated my energy but I had to go outside for a bit
>that time everyone yelling nonsense to drown out a substitute teacher and they stop and I yell DONG just as they stop
>that time my teacher saw me write KFC on a map of Africa

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>>35601444
Nice digits anon.
Gonna go ahead and check those for you.

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>>35603384
The government's run by Jews. Why would they be proud to fight for those faggots?

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>be me
>19
>playing hide n seek tag
>pretend to have a seizure to cheat
>start getting kicked and snow kicked in my face
>crying
>say i had a seizure to make them feel bad
>tfw i faked a seizure and got the shit kicked out of me

im still in pain thinking about it

>>35601407
lol youre a dick

>>35601407
man my chest hurrts to much to laugh, but it was worth it

>>35609265
>19
>still playing hide and seek
cmon, m8

>>35601278
I called my teacher "Dad" once. Fucking hell. Lucky one of my friends in the class was the only one who heard me and he'd called a teacher "mom" in the past so he took it easy on me.

Was almost 10 years ago and I still get the cringies.

>homeless man on street corner
>Puts out 2 hands asking for money
>Instead, I high five both of his hands
>After 5 days, realize what I had done
>Badfeelsman

>>35601297
haha pedo scum

>>35601848
are you sure you're heterosexual? you sound like a gay or bisex in denial

The first time I asked a girl out always makes me cringe. What makes it worse is after not seeing her since high school graduation she now works with me. Now I get to live that humiliation five days a week

>>35603529
these would cause me a panic attack... that's why I'm still a landwhale, to protect myself

>>35607263
what the fuck is a cyber ape?

>>35607890
>censored
did you two fuck? kek

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>>35601242
>be me
>9
>in maths
>complete worksheet
>scribble on worksheet "2 esay"
>got all the questions wrong
>couldn't spell easy
>teacher showed everyone in the class

>go to foreign country to meet internet friends
>huge beta of course
>theres a girl there with zero romantic interest in me
>go after her in the most autistic of ways
I can't really pinpoint one moment since that entire trip was a cringefest.

>>35609241
it was the Rothschilds who stepped in to have our new Russian nuclear power plant (Paks 2) greenlighted by the EU... fuck them all, I don't want to become part of some nuclear wasteland...

>>35601242
can't remember off the top of my head but I bet you anything it'll all come flooding back at about 1am

When I hit puberty I have always felt like I can't show anybody my true self because I liked to watch anime. I never told anybody about it, I'm 25 now. Not a single person in my life knows about it.

I stopped caring for anime like 4 or 5 years ago. But I kept myself shut in. Now I can't show anybody how I truly feel about things. My family knows I never had a girlfriend. I told them when I ways like 17 it would never happen and they didn't take me seriously.

Because of my fucked up pride and fear of other people I ended up in this hopeless situation. I have a few friends who I call occasionally to hang out. They never asked me about girls, I guess they assume I had one or two girlfriends but currently don't. Truth is I never tried. I never talked to girls.

I crave a normal life with friends and a girlfriend now. But it is too late. My therapist hits me with the usual meme "it's never to late". But it is too late, I can never open myself up to people becasue nobody would want to deal with a guy who did insane shit like me. I would have to make up stories but thats now how you truly open up to people.

>>35601407
Wtf? You were 6 when he told you and 8 when you did it. Kids are easily influenced, wasn't really your fault, you didn't know any better.

>>35601242
>small child
>dad gave me wine gums
>had a few and acted super drunk
>"anon they don't actually have wine in them"
>"o-oh."

any attempt i ever made with the opposite sex

>>35610564
You sound just like me, except my family constantly asks if im gay

>>35606248
that sounds funny it probably wasnt that bad

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>>35603529
I wasn't ready
I'm never ready
No rest for the socially retarded

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Too many, man

>finally hook up with friend that happens to be oneitis
>tell her I've been in love with her since the moment I saw her immediately after
>things get weird and we never do anything ever again

>get crazy drunk at party
>everyone takes showers after pool
>end up going full lonely and depressed mode
>girl that isnt on my drunk level comes in
>oh hey anon, I gotta go to the bathroom I won't look
>peek my head out of the door
>hey uh... You wanna join me? I'm feelin kinda lonely
>haha, what? No thanks anon
>she leaves
>we share a bed and cuddle while I practically go on and on about how much I hate myself
>she teases me about being a softie all morning

>wake up after a different crazy night
>stumble into kitchen
>cute girl I was chatting up the night before is making breakfast
>oh my god anon are you okay?
>y-yeah I just need to get to the bathroom
>shoot her a smile and fingerguns
>check mirror in bathroom
>vomit all in my beard and shirt

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>>35601407
I laughing my ass off and would have done the same in such moment

>>35601242
>went to a party with friends brought back girl to his place
>sperged out and insisted on sleeping head to toe on couch

i dont want to know this feel

>>35608982
That escalated quickly kek

>>35607334
please share the highlight reel

>>35609190
Poop story please anon

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>>35611261
>fingerguns

My fucking sides

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>>35607218
>Don't love myself anymore, that's for sure

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>>35609190
>>that time I made "this is sparta" joke and the english teacher said he appreciated my energy but I had to go outside for a bit
>>that time everyone yelling nonsense to drown out a substitute teacher and they stop and I yell DONG just as they stop
>>that time my teacher saw me write KFC on a map of Africa