Story time

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>>35525098
>be me
>go back from uni
>change into comfy clothes
>make some tea
>open /r9k/
>see op being an unoriginal faggot again

>>35525227
England?

If yes, let me have your boipussi pls

>>35525098
>be op
>go on /r9k/
>ask for greentexts
>thats it
>procede to suck cock

I'll greentext a recent great day I had

>Wake up at 1 PM
>Buy the Sly Cooper collection on PS3
>Finish Sly 1
>Roommate asks me if I want to take shrooms
>Think for a second
>Realize I have nothing better to do
>Take shrooms for the first time ever
>Stomach started hurting
>Go upstairs to my room alone
>Shit starts looking real weird
>All of the wires from my game consoles look like spiders
>Spatial perception is gone, get light-headed
>Turn off the lights to try and sleep it off
>Feels like the darkness is coming to swallow me
>Closing my eyes makes me just see nightmarish visions
>Decide to make the journey to go downstairs to be with him
>Melt into the couch
>Lose consciousness for a few hours with a few random hiccups where I would interject nonsense
>Saw the most beautiful visions I had ever imagined
>Ambient music in the background was nothing short of fucking bliss
>Came down from the high and realized I couldn't explain what I saw
>Get sad about that but came out with a better outlook on life

7/10

tl;dr woke up at 1 pm, beat Cooper 1, took shrooms for the first time, tripped sack, went to sleep

>>35525098
>be me
>havent has sex since dec 2015
>in class with 8/10 guy
>he asks for my number
>i give it to him
>hang out at his house
>have two drinks too many
>told him i didnt want to fuck
>fucked anyway
>should of showered and shaved b4 fuck
>lmfao........ahhhhhhh
>just finished period day before
>TOLD HIM I DIDNT COME OVER TO FUCK
>he wanted to anyway.....
>now we get to see each other again and it sucks bc I know im capable of good sex
>sex in 2015 was 10/10 the best ever
>so even though he has smaller dick I can still make it good
>am really sad because I dont think he will give me another shot
why the fuck am i telling any of you this ?????

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>>35525098
>be in the shelter
>mon-fri at 8 am they expect u to leave bed/rooms and not return till 4 unless special pass
>pass for old banged up people or overtime wagies
>they come twice to check rooms between 9am and 2 pm
>finally find out way to trick the pod people
>be a smol goy, but clevr
>enter a flat guru mummy meditative state under a thick comfortr
>place has never known orcaught me yet