/britfeel/ NEET flatshare edition

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First for waifus, probably. Post 'em lads.

>tfw you're perpetually worried about being internet stalked by GCHQ because you've googled "white phosphorus" 3 times over the past week.

Heh. It's probably fine though, right?

>>35522919
>tfw Tom Hardy is a manlet and not really a big guy

>>35522915
It is fine. Unless you googled "buying white phosphorus to make a bomb to kill Theresa May when she's visiting the <place she will actually be on Thursday> which I'll plant because Special Branch Sergeant <name> has been bribed etc. etc. etc."

Unless you're an actual terrorist or you literally escaped from prison, nobody cares

>>35522948
Let's hope eh lad? Still, it rubs me up the wrong way that they even could.

>>35522948
I can't believe anyone would actually want to hurt mummy May.

Unless they were a Scot, I guess.

Tipoffanon to fight Dealeranon in a pub carpark scrap?

>>35523037
People here like Mother May too senpai

>it's another "anon remembers the time he made a rape joke in high school and instantly went from 'the quiet guy' to 'the creepy rapist dude'" episode

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>>35523150
>high school
Leave us be!

>>35522866

After the last thread, decided to report someone to crimestoppers. I know they are a charity and I don't need the money, so told them I didn't want to claim the reward

>>35523146
People here tolerate May as the least worst of the only two viable options within our voting system

>>35523162

is Operation GANGES back on?

>>35523150
I went to a "popular kids" secondary school party once, when I got there a drunk popular girl put her hands down my pants, anyway she jerked me off and went elsewhere. When I got to school everyone said I raped her and I was the creepy rapey kid

I enjoyed the name

>>35523195
I thought they only paid out if they resulted in a conviction

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>>35522915
>tfw she'll never tie me up and violate me

who here /have significant mental problems but is also British so you don't talk about it and instead tell everyone you're fine and resort to ironic shitposting on a anonymous Mongolian image board/?

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>>35522866
Who /offworktomorrowsogettingshitfacedaloneinhisroomplayingvidyaallnight/ here?

>>35523219
Not really sure why non-Brits detest our threads so much, must be the envy of Kettle chips, we feel it too lads.

>>35523254
Seems like some of us a doomed to be a scapegoat for more successful people's troubles.

>>35523267
That's almost a prerequisite to being here.

>>35522395
Ive made a habit of robbing a creme egg every time I go to sainsbos

I'm a right edgelord, me

What is the point of these threads? They seem like a lot of effort went into them >>35522814

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>>35523259

It pays out if the person is charged

Captcha: 'Neighbourhood Crime Watch'

Top fucking kek

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>>35523302

>That captcha

>>35523299
To make posters here more insecure.

>>35523294
You'll soon amass an empire on your ill-gotten goods anon. Make habits of shit like that and the loot adds up rather quickly.

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Been hallucinating when Im tired lads, not sure what its all about. I get weird visuals and if I close my eyes they intensify like a tv screen into a giant picture. As if my conciousness is shifting elsewhere to some other place and I'm physically seeing it.

Not sure if going crazy or gaining superpowers.

>>35523302
>Captcha: 'Neighbourhood Crime Watch'

kek views highly of crimestoppers

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>>35523150
>tfw was the edgy guy at school around year 10
People already hated me for not talking that much, so I just gave them a reason to. It just made things worse for those 2 years, but when I left for college I moved about half way down the country so I didn't have to deal with them ever again. 7 years of peace from those twats since moving.

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>>35523207
Which is ridiculous.

JEREMY "STATE ISSUED GIRLFRIENDS" CORBYN FOR PM

why do my posts go to archive ?

I just wrote 3 relatively aggressive pages to appeal a bullshit sanction

>Did I waste my time?

>>35523294
Seen lads just eat them in the store

Sister caught me watching porn, lads.

At least it was fat asians and not the trannies I normally jerk off to.

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>>35523294
>not stealing gum right in front of the fag counter when buying fags

step it up lad and get on my patrician level

How much money can i get in housing benefits as a single man? I live in a shared house if that makes sense and i've no inclination to work any longer.

>>35523459

if you're under 35 you only get a rate for a room in a shared house. basically you need social housing to make it viable

Absolute state of my arsehole lads.

>troll a thread
>no one gives me any (you)s
Wasting my time lads.

how do you make friends as a neet i'm so ronery

>>35523484
my room costs 320 a month will the guberment pay that? i see no reason to work

Can we have the crimestoppers number in the next OP image?

>>35523509
Take a class in something. Art or a sport.

>>35523509
you dont unless you have good social skills and are okay talking on voip, however you will never really be treated as a friend, more an aquaintance and thus treated as such you wont be a priority and may often be ignored as such

What's for dinner? I've got some mince meat in the fridge, dunno what to make with it though

>>35523395
Does Jezza have to power or will to bring gfs back to the people?

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>>35523273
Spot fucking on, same here lad, cheers!

>>35523523

you need to look up Local Housing Allowance on your council website. for my area they'll pay 276.11

>>35523541
Normies don't want NEET friends. They get kind of weird about it. Ideally NEETs would befriend other NEETs.

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>>35523571
Jezza's got it all

@35523500
need to work on ur b8 m80, no (You) for you

>>35523523

Allowance for a shared house for most areas is around 53 britbongs per week.

>>35523273
what vidya laddo

>>35523541
I unironically took a class in latin and everyone just leaves after the session and does their own thing. i'm pretty sure the only girl my age started a forced conversation with an OAP after the lesson was concluded so she could avoid talking to me.

>>35523577
you're such a qt lad, would buy you a drink and try to stick it in your bum later/10

>>35523395
Which is worse, a UK governed by pedantic incel nationalist authoritarians or by socialist Chads

I'm willing to accept a *few* immigrants if it means I get to jeep my bennies

Who /can'tbebotheredtocooksoyou'rejustfillinguponbreadsticks/ here?

haven't posted in /britfeel/ in over a year

hows everyone doing? i'm now a 24 year old virgin, hate life and most people

>>35523500
go to /adv/ if you want to troll. i have made troll threads on there and they gave me about 100 (you)s

>>35523532
What crimes are most people reporting anyway

If it's people phoning in complaining about the local kids playing their music 5 decebils over the legal limit then I am sorely disappointed in now normal you've all become

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>>35523756
>/adv/ is just "pls help my gf is x" problems
What the fuck happened to this site?

>>35523577
Cheers, lad. Two bottles of Mateus here which should get me nicely fucked, but not so fucked that I'm horrendously sick tomorrow.

>>35523608
Dark Souls 3, mate. Finally making a proper NG+ run instead of getting instantly bored and making another character.

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>>35523747
meh, have my good days and bad days. I suffer from extremely bad paranoia almost every day of my life, but I seem to be on the mend. Missing the girl I used to love, who I last saw visiting in the psychiatric ward. I'm thinking of writing a book about my relationship with her with funny little doodles in it and stuff. And you?

By the way lads, despite having bought myself a nice overcoat, I'm still consistently getting 4's and 5's in /soc/ rate threads. Someone commented that I dress like a faggot, and that I need to dress more "age appropriately". I'm just not that into streetwear to be honest. Any suggestions on how to get a better look going? Or is it my face?

>>35523812
same old mayn, weekly suicidal thoughts etc. working the same shit job, in the last year of my apprenticeship now. sick of getting paid an apprentice wage m8

>>35523747
full of despair, anger and fear. fucking hate my life desu.

>>35523788
i dont know why but its mostly normies on /adv/ or girls. yes, legitament girls. i used to on there quite but got fed up of the constant relationship threads.

>>35522866
Quintessentially British telly

Oh, it's great being black in a white neighborhood

>White boys wont DARE start a fight with you

"intimidates whites guy*

>You get to fuck EVERY white girl whitin a one mile radius with your beautiful black...

*cuts to interracial sex scene*

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tyhmlS-CMsQ

>>35523922
No pic this time, lad? Its just not the same

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>>35523653
Cheers, Just enjoy the odd drink lad.

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What do you think he thinks about lads?

>>35523604
Jesus Christ

You can't get anywhere on that

Pretty bored lads, we should watch a movie or something

>>35523273
i'm off tomorrow but got doctors. told myself i wouldn't drink. but fuck it i'm not in the mood to sit here sober. will just put up with the negative thoughts and drink myself to sleep.

>>35523944
these crack me the fugg up

just fucking depressed and alone lads

>>35524032
Can't wait for /Goodfellas/. My white gf is so hyped about it

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>>35524032
I'm down (original original original)

>>35524032
you got a movie to stream. i know a cytu room we can watch it in.but i know fuck all about streaming them

I'm getting noticably fatter lads. Kinda panicing. I can't stop eating like a fat cunt.

>>35524051
same. if we get a film going come watch. better than nowt eh lad

>>35524098
When you approach 30, you'll start to see your hair thinning, your eyes deteriorating and getting fatter

Fun stuff

>>35524098
*panicking

Spelling gets shitty after 30 hours of being awake.

>>35524112
Sounds like a great time to kill myself.

>>35524102
No sites that involve downloading dodgy scripts this time

Absolutely haram

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Good evening, /britfeel/!
How are you all doing today?
What have you been up to?
Who would win in a fight, bilbo or frodo baggins?

Hope you've all had a great day whatever you've got up to and are feeling well!
Frodo would obviously win.

>>35524032
might as well. what film?

>>35524078
I don't really have anything decent downloaded, a few series etc but nothing spectacular.

Currently downloaded I have the harry potter movies, the south park movie, some random episodes of south park, sausage party and the lego movie... slim pickings desu and I have no idea how to stream etc

>gotten addicted to burning things

I just spend all day at my desk burning paper and various things. This is going to end badly lads, I can tell

>>35522866
Just won a fiver on a scratch card lads, I'm living it up tonight

>>35524198
I thought most people went through that phase at 12

might get a wii u this weekend lads

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>>35522915
wagwan QT, love to see the other QT lads about.
>>35524126
starting on the political theory essay and trying not to down the bleach.

>tfw halfway done shaving off bodyhair

This is more effort than I thought lads, only the legs to go now though.

>>35524270
>shaving when epilators exist

>>35524232
wait til christmas lad

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>>35522915
postin

takeaway tonight trying to decide between chinese or thai

>>35524270
Sorry to break this to you but you'll fucking regret this within 48 hours.

Should have waxed

>>35524295
I've looked at getting one but I need money for drugs.

Tonight's my last chance to get pissed up for acouple of months at least. Got the anime on. Drinking some JD.

>>35524225
Trying to lose weight lads, it's not that hard since I only really eat 2 meals a day usually but giving up pop is the hardest, I drink 1-2 litres a day and I'm suffering major withdrawals

>>35524270
You'll quickly get bored and tired of that shit and stop bothering

Not worth the effort

>>35524126

getting drunk, getting high, writing software to control rc cars.

And yeah, of course Frodo would win. Bilbo is 1000 year old.
Unless it's vs. Young Bilbo. YB would use dirty tactics to win.

Anyone else love Heroes and Generals?

anon who took viagra earlier here. 2 wanks since and both with harder benis than usual. only took just over half the smallest dose. no side effects as yet

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>>35524418
Clunky shooters

Best shooters

>>35524386
>Bilbo is 1000 year old
nope

>>35524124
obviously. and no film that has to be watvhed in parts. had a shit night in a room a few week back
>>35524193
how about southpark movie. if others agree

>parents getting divorced
>will have to live with my mum every other week
i'm seriously considering suicide over it lads, please help

>>35524434
It's called hyperbole

>>35524140
i think a film is easier. but what series you got.

>>35524437
What's stopping you from living with your father?

>>35524446
it's called damage control

>>35524437
Two christmas's lad

Is there a feeling for the dread I feel that I might be retarded but I'm so retarded that I'm completely oblivious to it/no one's ever told me and they're just pretending I'm normal?

>>35524437
>have to

are you 10 years old mate?

>>35524476
If you're self aware enough to ask this question, you're not retarded.

>>35524302
kung pao chicken lad

>>35524300
b-but it's only march anon

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>>35522866
Somebody asked if I would be interested in Studding Mr Cuddles today, lads. He said he'd pay around 300 and offer me pick of the litter.

Apparently, he has a Cane Corso bitch. I'm not too keen

>>35524470
>>35524485
No, but there's no reasonable way to turn it down
>>35524474
>implying I won't kill myself before then

i have forgot to have a wank today. i guess its time to chock the chicken. motherless it is

>>35524471
That's what you're doing right now, yes

Nice to see you have some self-awareness

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NHS here, hope you lads are staying safe during your 'meet-ups'

>>35524565
>(poo)
heh

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>>35524565
My meetups just consist of benis rubbing

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>Pinocchio, lied, and that's what kept him from it
>I tell the truth, and I keep running
>It's like I'm lookin for something out there, tryna find something
>I turn on the TV, and see me, and see nothing
>What does it feel like, to live real life, to be real
>Not some facade on TV that no one can really feel
>Do you really have the stamina?
>For everybody that sees you that say, "Where's my camera?"
>For everybody that sees you, to say sign a autograph
>For everybody that sees you cryin, say you oughta laugh

>>35524565
That face says it all regarding the state of gays

>lenlad will never cook pasta for me

>>35524126
>Who would win in a fight, bilbo or frodo baggins?
who has the ring. are they both the same age. is this before or after they have taken on their quests?
it's a toughy this, lad.you bugger.
if they're both the same age i go with bilbo, he can be ruthless when needed
>the other questions.
been a bit shit this week, but off tomorrow to go to doctors.
how about you, lad has your day been fun.

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>going to go out for a few drinks with the lads on st paddys day
Whats the plan for the weekend, lads?

you lads were talking about a film before. i was thinking abcs of death. i can't do it right now but how about at ten

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>>35524613
>Len will never push me off a balcony

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>>35524609
is kanye the official rapper of /r9k/

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>>35524609
>Nigga don't miss, better not miss
>Better not miss... Better not miss
>Better not miss...
>Don't miss, don't miss...
>The camera's on, you gotta do it like, this...
>And move your other leg like, this...
>And uh, don't get nobody pissed
>AYE NIGGA, AYE NIGGA DON'T MISS!
>Everyday's the super bowl...
>You better not miss!
>Everyday is the playoffs, or the championship,
>NIGGA DON'T MISS!
>If you miss one step we gon', we gon' treat you like this...
>We gon' talk shit about you like this
>We gon' beat you up like this
>We gon' say that people don't like you
>We gon' try to make the whole world hate you...

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>>35524600
That's fine, as long as you check each other's equipment and are happy with it

>>35524650
Visiting family on thursday until sunday. Going to visit my grandparents on sunday.

>>35524668
how the fuck do you even get arrested in newcastle, unless you punch a horse it's pretty much anything goes

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>>35524672
Do the NHS seriously have to issue leaflets that let employees know to check their tools. That doesn't instil much confidence

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>>35524701
>Pictured, the Brixtonites when they heard too much was baked

eating better and exercise bike for at least 30 minutes for the past 3 days lads

down 4 pounds

>>35524668
no that goes to Kid Cudi but Cudi is the prodigy of Kanye

>On Christmas time, my mom Christmas grind
>Got me most of what I wanted, how'd you do it mom
>She copped the toys I would play with in my room by myself
>"Why he by himself?"

gonna go along to a group meditation session with the local Hare Krishnas who give out free food outside my student halls. Hope it's not a pyramid scheme, just going for the company desu as I struggle to fit in at uni.

>>35524701
As someone that works for the NHS, absolutely. Some plonker sent an email to every single NHS email account by accident. It caused my browser to crash when it loaded.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-37979456

>someone sent an email to everyone explaining what happened and advising us not to reply
>requested a fucking read receipt
>from every email in the world's fifth largest employer

Yes. Yes we need guidance on everything.

>>35524512
Smelly knackers OUT

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>>35522866

I wish Harold Shipman posted in britfeel

>>35524437
>>35524524
You don't have to do shit. If you're the age you should be, then they no longer have custody. Custody shouldn't even be a question.

Unless... was their deal that neither of them should be saddled with the full burden of looking after you? It's not that they fought for visitation rights, it's that they fought each other to make sure neither of them had to be stuck with you alone.

>>35524565
hmm this must affect grills that do atm then also.

didn't Pamela Anderson get that.

>>35524512
do it, free money

>>35524773
>sad sack rapper
>also made a terrible rock album about depression and self-harm which featured Beavis and Butthead skits

/ourguy/ no doubt

>>35524822
I actually attended a pyramid scheme lecture/ trying to get you to join thing. I was looking for a job at the time and a friends friend was too and got invited along and invited me to go to.

The were trying to sell cooking wear that you didnt need to greese but they didnt out right say you have to buy this then sell it.

at the time I had just finished watching welcome to the NHK and was feeling quite uncomfortable about the situation. I hung around till the end for the food, gave fake contact info and left, didnt see the guy I went with after that, my friend said he got in debt

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is Viagra man still about?
did it go down yet?

>>35524907
Man on the Moon and Man on the Moon 2 are amazing albums though, I just he kept rapping instead of making trash like Speeding Bullet 2 Heaven. Passion, Pain and Demon Slayin is also pretty good, definitely a step in the right direction

whats your favourtie game and why is it snake eater?

https://youtu.be/z4BKKJuI5bE

>>35524658
i'm not really a big horror fan desu. is it a scary 1.
but i'd be up for it

>>35524977
its not horror, its a bunch of short grindhouse films made by different directors.

>>35524907
is kid cudi worth getting into? i like some of his hits but i have never properly listened to him. his albums have pretty mediocre ratings

>>35524658
preferably nothing horrorish but desu I'm so bored I'll go with whatever someone wants to stream

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>>35524650
Out with the housemates and next door for St Paddys day, then off to watch football on Saturday. Should be a good one, looking forward to it so knowing my luck i'll get hit by a truck on thursday or something.

how did I end up as EVERYTHING I hated as a kid

well except an addict, thank god

>>35525033
>except an addict, thank god

Drugs are great mate; nothing like forcing your brain to feel good like a bit of drugs.

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>there are normies in this thread who are going to go out drinking on St Patrick's Day

>>35524851
Watch it, mush, I am considered an "ethnic minority" now. The police will not take kindly to your blatant racism.

>>35524877
Worried that he will sell the puppies to niggers and chavs. I want them to go to good homes.

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>>35524867
but he an heroed lad

>>35524997
Man on the Moon and Man on the Moon 2 were critically acclaimed i believe, very good relatable albums

>google chrome doesn't recognize relatable as a word

>>35525066
I'm going to a gig on my own. Will probably have a few beers.

>>35525014
who you watching lad

>>35525066
Makes a change from drinking alone. Go out, get so wankered you can't remember what happens, get a kebab and go home snug in bed.

>>35524966
Can already tell this is a guy wanting to fuck the left one and she brought her drab friend along

>>35525064
maybe for normies, if youve got any kind of anxiety disorder drugs are literal hell

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>>35525099
Palace at home to Watford, if we can win I'll be hopefully we can avoid getting relegated, if not we're going down like the titanic.

>>35524996
>>35525000
just watched a clip. looks ok. not scarey, looks fun, i'm up for that

>>35525082
i might give them a listen then

>>35525135
well if someone links to where it's being streamed, I'll join

>>35525070
>want them to go to good homes

You're a fucking smelly gypo, they can't go to any worse homes than yours.

>>35525151
i'll post the link in about an hour, i cant stream it right now.

>>35525122
>my anxiety prevents me from enjoying drugs in the safety of my quiet room alone browsing 4chan at the weekends

whatever you say pal

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>ex gf hasn't changed her netflix password a year after we broke up

>>35525188
ok cool, will touch my willy for a bit

>>35525191
i'm scared of taking any drugs incase I OD or just die from them or something

also they're degenerate

>>35525220
Wont she notice movies in her history she didnt watch?

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>tfw been binging on visual novels lately

fuck m8s this is a great way to pass time.

just finished steins gate after puttin it off so long and just got the bad ending on symphonic rain, itching to play it again but i got fucking work blocking the way. also have 4 more VNs in my backlog.

fuck wagecucks.

>>35525249
thats a yummy looking pizzar lad

>>35525255

yeah, shame i moved from cheetham hill to old trafford and ill never get to that amazing paki(well, its half polish) store again.

every other pakistore here and the city centre is pure shit, so ive never had pizza in over a year.

>>35525188
good stuff
>>35525230
i was planning on playing with mine desu lad
wank,tea, spliff then film

>>35525249
I 100% completed katawa shoujo last year. i haven't felt the same since.

>>35525249
I recommend Swan Song, senpai

>>35524263
Aaa keep away from the bleach, just think of the treats you're in for when you finish your essay!

Hope you finish it quick bud!

>>35524386
Writing software for rc cars? please tell me more!

I was thinking prime bilbo vs prime frodo, I could see bilbo seemingly get the upper hand at first due to his trickery but I think frodo would just bash his shit in.

>>35524634
I was thinking the prime versions of both!
I guess they'd both have to have sting too hmm
this gets more complicated, would they each have a gandalf?
one on one though I think frodo would wreck him for sure, frodo went through some shit.

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>>35525242
she had a bunch of profiles for her family she shared with and let me make one. There was 4 profiles at one point so I think she removed her dads who never used it thinking it was mine, hopefully she never goes onto the one I use and see I'm still watching stuff on it

>>35525152
That was quite rude, desu.

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>dad going for an outpatient consultation at the cardiology department after his heart palpitations have been getting worse
>he's very overweight and has a terrible diet

if he has a heart attack and passes away - be it sudden or prolonged - I am killing myself 100%

can't foresee any reason why I would want to stick around after he's gone

>>35525131
think you guys will be alright, sunderland will probably pull off their usual last ditch escape too

>>35525376
I hope sunderland stay up so newcastle can thrash them next season

give it to me straight lads, how weird am i?

i get sexual pleasure from being afraid.
i am a massive pussy when it comes to games and tv, i get scared extremely easily. like i'll be playing fatal frame at night with the lights off or something and be completely petrified, but also have a massive boner and a smile on my face.

>>35525375
Fuck lad hope things improve, idea of it happening scares the shit out of me.

Was hoping my dad would look after himself better after his cancer run in but really he's only made marginal changes.

>>35525394
GHOST BLOWJOB!

WOOOOWOOOOWOOOOO!

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>granddad has dementia
>getting worse
>can't even remember my nan most of the time and they have been married for 60 years

It's fucking heartbreaking to watch. Going to make sure i kill myself before i reach an advanced age because this is awful.

>>35525389
yeah the tyne-wear derbies are usually pretty decent

>>35525469
memory loss is my worst fear, hope im able to kill myself in a moment of clarity if i ever suffer from alzheimers or something

>>35525394
Honestly that sounds more like a coping mechnaism and some wires have gotten crossed along the way.

like those dudes who get off sexually from adrenaline rushes or really going for it at the gym

whats a good conception to conceptualise?

>>35525394
whatever floats your boat anon, it's not hurting anyone

>>35525596
your own

lads, I know this is normie shit but I've got nowhere else for this. gf hasn't read whatsapp message over 2 hours after I sent it asking if she wants to do something tomorrow night. I think there's a way on iphone to make it look like you haven't read a message so I think that's what she's done. relationship was doomed anyway because we're really different (she's a turbonormie borderline Stacy and I'm posting on r9k) but I do love her despite all that. probably better it happens earlier but still feels awful

>>35525469
>>35525556
I'd like to think I would kill myself in the later phrases but I can't decided what would hurt my family more

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alright lads here a link to the stream. please come join

>>35525469
I know how you feel. My Granddad hasn't forgotten my Nan yet but he gets my mum and aunt mixed up and doesn't remember me or my siblings

>>35525311
this is defo a complicated 1 lad, i'm sat here trying to remember what each went through. i might have to read the books again desu. they both went through character forming situations.
don't forget bilbo went through his fare share of shit i still think bilbo though. you can't underestimate him. 1 slip and he'll be behind frodo slicing his throat.
i don't think they should have a gandalf each. this should be a fair 1 on 1 fight to the death
hobbit thunderdome. 2 bagginses enter1 baggins leaves

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>>35525469
I'm praying to every single deity, even the bad ones, that my mum doesn't get dementia or altzheimer's.

>>35522866
Pakis beat up white woman and her boyfriend in racist attack, lads. I wish I lived in an ethnically diverse area :(

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-4312204/Woman-seen-staggering-racist-thugs-break-nose.html#newcomment

>>35525628
it's been 2 hours, calm the fuck down you complete sperglord

>>35525679
is shipman still the password.

>>35525754
yes, but i got rid of the password so you shouldn't need it.

got that feeling in the nose and throat when you are about to get a cold

fucks SAKE

>>35525786
I had that feeling for a week
I never got a cold

>>35525749

thanks, lad. appreciate the sentiment but I think I'm right here

>>35525220
Hacked netflix accounts are $0.25 on the darknet.

>>35525746
The white scum obviously said something to get that reaction. Besides, Karma is a bitch. You shouldn't have gone around the world raping and killing people

>>35525849
fuck off p-boo desu, racist piece of shit.

>>35525807
it's fine to be out of touch for a few hours, just chill out

Just did the maths on how many more days I will have to go to work before retirement.

Now I'm depressed.

wew, girls are pretty disgusting lads

no wonder people like to drink before they fuck

Really crushing hard on this girl at work but dunno what to do desu

>>35525951
Do I dare ask how many?

>waiting for delivery
>wearing skirt
>don't want to get changed
>don't want deliveryman to judge me for being a degenerate

what do lads

>>35525962
how are they disgusting? they make my dick hard

>>35526043
beg for attention elsewhere

>>35526043
put some trousers on you silly trap
(post boipucci)

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what do with hair? been called "old man-ish" on /soc/, I thought the coat suited me.

>>35526177
not sure why but you look dutch

>>35526177
Is that a combover?

>>35526177
Is that you Mitchell?

>>35526177
You could probably style it to look like Conan O'Brien

>>35526177
>i'll try wearing old man clothes and oversized headphoens in public to attract attention
>let me just take a selfie - but not before I pull a quirky wink

what a faggot

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>>35526043
>tfw obsessed with a UK cosplayer on instagram

>>35526177
better than looking like a 14 year old even though your 19 like i do.

>>35526177
You look like martin clunes mate, stop posting pics

>>35526177
if I saw you in the street I'd probably want to beat you up tbchwy

>>35526232
post some pics lad, don't forgot your boibutt

>>35526177
grow it longer
wear womens clothing
take hormones
become my sex slave

>>35526177
i've triangulated your position using flight paths and i'm coming to steal your headphones

Lads should I buy Nier when I get paid next week or wait for Persona 5 to be released

>>35526341
whatever you do just b.e yourself

>>35526210
still not clear as to why everyone thinks a generic grey overcoat and a generic burgundy jumper is "old man's clothes"

>>35526365
Never mind looking 14, in that pic you look like a FtM tranny

Great. Now the thread is becoming /soc/

>>35526387
fuck you lad i'm 100% male. i would grow a beard if i could.

>>35526422
>i'm 100% male
>i would grow a beard if i could

ok """lad"""

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Cadbury are at it again, who is the culinary genius behind these?

>>35526365
looks like simongamer987

>>35525867

I know, but I can't stop. and I still think I'm right. it's just that if I am right I'd rather know now.

this shit is exactly why I'm not cut out for the normie world. I have a decent job, my own place and I can get gfs, but behind the facade I'm a terrible robotic wreck

>>35526457
>mint
>oreos

the abosulte madmen

> who is the culinary genius behind these?
kraft i think nowadays which is sad desu

too many meanies in brit feel. this is why i would never post a pic of myself.

>>35526488
>think you're shitting me
>you're right

when the fuck did this travesty happen

>>35526526
Like four years ago I think, it wasn't great. Bit of an uproar about it tbqhwyfamalam

yo, who wants a scrap? i wrestle with jehovah like joeseph

>>35526572
Thought it was just a random angel Joeseph wrestled with and not Jehovah, I'm probably wrong though lad

>>35526603
not even sure tbqhwy. dont know what is going on half the time in the old testament.

>>35526572
ill wrestle you lad, greco roman style, naked, olive oiled up, no homo of course

>>35526603
it says that he seen god face to face and he wrestled with a man. so im not even sure.

>Crimestoppers code comes through after filling in the online form
wew lad, now we wait

I need to pick up a shitty cash sink F2P game NOW, do I choose to waste money like a retard on Faeria or Duelyst? Considering I've NEVER played either

>>35526030

10,428 working days left.

I can't face another 1.

>>35526721
Save more, invest, retire early lad

>>35526667
It's Jacob I'm talking about anyway, the Bible is fucking weird. Jacob wrestling the Angel has too many alien/ufo connections to make sense of.

>>35526341
A couple of nier must be cheap as fuck these days as a snubbed old game.

>>35526213
Who's this skank?

>>35526762
Think he means Automata, the new one

Does britfeel have any pets?

Im thinking of getting one, not sure on what animal though

>>35526855
get a creep tier one like a ferret or something, it's only fitting

>>35526744
its all dodgy. i dont know if its a metaphor or what. i read a book called gods of eden a good few years ago that talks about angels being aliens that are minipulating humans.

https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=genesis%2032:22-31

this is the verse i was on about anyway.

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Rate my original dinner lads

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>>35526786
I wanna fuck Toobie

>>35526897
What the fuck is that brown thing?

>>35526897
serious question, are you lee lad?

>>35526914
Thats my friend Poleaboo

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>tfw your wife says "What's britfeel"

>>35526897
Did you fry a block of fucking mince?

>>35526855
Used to have a cat but it was too much effort looking after

>>35526897

Are you the guy who occasionaly posts that 1 image of his desk with a full ashtray on it?

You'd be over 30 I think, or at least 29

>>35526914
>>35526942
It's just a burger (I already started eating it)

>>35526933
>mum opens my door to say goodnight
>asks me why I'm always on this site
>'just coding mum'
>she leaves

success

>>35526990
She probably watched the 4chan documentary, she knows all anon, delete everything

>>35526855
Always wanted a dog, parents would never let me, ended up with a hamster but the only thing it even did that was interesting was kill my brother's hamster.

I move to uni and all of a sudden 'hurr durr we're getting a dog now'.

It is a nice small doggo. Only ever see it when I visit home from uni. Doesn't need much looking after, house training is a pain in the arse but we had all wood/tile floors so no biggie.

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How exactly are 'we' meant to get on the property ladder?

The price of houses on my street have quadrupled - 100,000 5 years ago, now close to 350,000.
Even if I miraculously work my arse off for the next 10 years, the houses will probably cost a million.

This is bullshit. I'm sick of being a rentcuck. On a zero-hour contact too. Life is suffering.

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>>35525131
>another palace fan robot

you best not be normie scum

>>35527088
renting is the only way these days lad

>>35527098
Trying to escape the robot life but sadly stuck with it. Reckon we're can avoid the drop?

>>35527155
>*we can
can't do anything right, kill me.

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>>35526897
LEE DETECTED

>>35527088

Worse part is some middle-class cunt who owns 6 houses will buy your childhood home and make you pay rent to live in it, like a good kuck.

It's amazing how wealth grows exponentially once you've made it past a certain threshold.

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>>35527088
You not seen the advert?
You're supposed to put your parents savings up on collateral and MAKE SURE YOU KEEP UP THE PAYMENTS

>>35527270
I hate that fucking advert, with the pooinloo at the end. anything with guarantors or collateral involved is shady as fuck

>>35527155
honestly dont know
>almost put 50 quid on us to go down at halftime losing to swansea at home
>playing consistently terrible for so long

with swansea and leicester back on form and even fucking hull getting points, who fucking knows. real worried if for any sake, just so we dont have to deal with swapping places with fucking brighton

im a horrible pessimist so id been resigned to fate for a while but those last two result got me hopeful

I can't stop drinking lads. I'm scared I'm going to become a fatbot again for the third time

>>35527088

I moved to the north, lad. the flat I rent is worth about 105k and I think the housing association will sell me it if I want it

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large doner and chips
extra chilli and garlic
one can of irn bru

>>35527307
Seems so shady how they slip in
"As long as you keep up the payments"
"I will!"

Like the people writing the advert know how shitty the deal is and had to put it in there

>>35527333
i'd kill for a nice greasy kebab right now

>>35527333
>Not getting diet irn bru
it's like you want to get fat or something

>>35527088

I bought a complete piece of shit 2 bed terrace for 85k. Scraping together the deposit was tough.

>>35527310

I've thought I've cracked it and fallen back many times, m8. running helps for me because it gets me out of the house and it makes me feel like I'd be wasting my progress if I had a drink

>>35527362
I can't run as well since I broke my knee, I mostly do lots of sit ups now but I'm still scared I'm gonna fuck it up again. even though I'm only 10 stone 2

>>35527356
can only order in haiku

>>35527344
I haven't actually looked into that mortgage but I wonder what happens if you miss a certain amount of payments. Do they then draw it out of the savings?

>>35527088
>>35527270

>realistically wageslave until my 50's
>finally become a homeowner
>have 10 years of 'life' left before i become a decrepit old man
>just remembered i'm a robot
>find a 'gf'... whaddya know, ladies love a homeowner
>die from heart attack at 70
>wifes son gets my house, that i worked my entire life for

Lol
You know its not an implausible scenario.

Have to admit, I'd be pissed to pass on my lifes work to a biological son/daughter, it's just $$$ to them.

My uncle bought a house recently, and the previous owner was an old lady who passed away - the grandkids who sold it asap for 240,000. Easiest money of their life.

>>35527215
lee reminds me of myself quite a lot

we probably have similar dna

>>35527458

They will take all the savings, repossess the house and kick you out.

>>35527433
but wheres your kireji though lad?

I've decided to make a list of games I want for the switch
If it gets fulfilled I'll buy one
If not they can shove it

>>35527215
I unironically enjoy his vlogs. Also, I seasoned my food.

>>35527361

Whereabouts lad? I could probably aim to buy a house at this price.

I live in London so it really distorts my perception of house prices.

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>>35527309
Past 2 games i've been sticking a fiver on the oppostion to win or a draw and so far my shit luck with gambling has outdone Wayne Hennessey being pic related. Every must win game we've got from now I'm going to do the same, every other games its gonna be a fiver on them winning. Will be me ideally 70 quid out of pocket by the end of the season, happy to pay that price as I'll be living nowhere near anyone I know next year and probably won't be able to make most championship games so streaming Palace will keep me sane. Guess I'd be alright with us going down as long as Brighton bottle it too and Millivojevic doesn't leave.

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>>35527490
too stupid for anything like that

>>35527521
what you mean like conceptually games you would like to see made?
whats on the list?

>>35527521
F-Zero GX 2 better be on that list

>>35527489
that's rough. all the savings seems a bit extreme especially if the parents have a large amount of savings.

>>35527409

How about a swim, lad? The bonus with that is that all the changing and shit takes up even more time and keeps you away from the drink for longer

>>35527530

In sunny New York!

New York, North Shields.

>>35527559
I actually tried swimming about a week ago and it hurt for longer but not immediately after, it took almost 2 days to reach peak pain and it still hasn't went away as of typing this. I'm getting physiotherapy soon though so that might help in the long run but I doubt it's going to be the same as it was.

>>35527538
It's a list of games I want to see on the system
A monster hunter game
A DQ game
A decent racing game that isn't mario kart

It's a work in progress

>>35527535
>wayne hennessey
most hit and miss keeper ive seen. legit looked good at times early on, but turned to dogshit along with everyone else

i miss speroni

Lotto or euromillions?

Will set up a direct debit

>go to bed
>wake up 3 hours later covered in sweat
This is surely a good sign

do you gaylords really have enemas everytime you bum?

>>35527736
>final stages of alcoholism sweats

>>35527749
Yeah we use camomile or malt vinegar.

>>35527736
Slept in your clothes right?

>>35527749
Unless you want to risk shit on dick, then it's almost mandatory

>>35527756
I havent drunk in awhile
>>35527777
Nope. In pants, window open and everything

>Never ever go out socialising
>One of my work colleagues invites me out
>He's an old guy (55) but he gets on well with people my age at work it seems
>Invites me to a club for a drink
>It's l i t e r a l l y phoenix fucking nights everyone is over 50 and playing bingo or dominoes
>Leave after 45 minutes

I'm never going out "socialising" again

>>35527656
Yeah absolutely love Jules. Thought Steeeeeeeeeve was quality before the injury, not a huge guy but a great shot stopper, reminded me of jules before he got replaced and subsequently turned a bit poor, but don't think Big Sam likes him so can't imagine we'll be seeing too much more of him. If we stay up summer has to be spent on getting Sakho permanent and a new GK that isn't shit if steeeeve leeeeeaves.

>>35527782
What about all the dirty bummers on nights out? Do they do it at home before they hit the club?

>>35527801
>>He's an old guy (55) but he gets on well with people my age at work it seems
hello fellow young people lets take some cannabis tablets and listen to the arctic kaiser chiefs

I'm going to Amsterdam next week. Should I shag a prozzie?

Last time I has sex was 8 years ago.

anon whose gf hasn't read whatsapp message suggesting we do something tomorrow in 4 hours here again

> no confirmation of whatsapp delivery

m-maybe she really hasn't read it

> active on facebook messenger 37 minutes ago

fuck, it's over

>>35527782
WTF! i'm thinking twice about being a huge faggot now

>>35527731

Postcode lottery

>>35527809
Most of them do yea, unless they're a dirty bastard. It'll last if you don't eat anything

>>35527801
Dont go out with a fecking 55 year old then you tosser. What did you expect to happen? Only time you should go out with someone that old to 'socialise' is if you're actually mates with them, you're going to the pub for a few drinks or it's your dad.

>>35527804
>sahko
what a legendary 2 performances. him and mili really showed up the rest of the squad. good stuff

>>35527833
i'm sorry, my dude.

although i've honestly got a lot out of being single. no responsibility, can nap whenever I want, can humorously comiserate with my best friend with a few beers and watch red dwarf together.

>>35527834
You're sticking your dick into something that regularly contains shit. Unless you have some sort of super diet that cleans you out, then what are you expecting to happen?

It's how you can tell LARPers when you see them talking about spontaneous anal sex, because you know they're talking bullshit 99.9% of the time.

>>35527843
ever won on that? done it for almost 2 years now

>>35527894
I'd be the bottom though, I'm just scared over doing an enema tbqh

>>35527827
why would you go to amsterdam and not shag prossies and do drugs? there's nothing else there interesting to do.

>>35527915
>I'm just scared over doing an enema tbqh
But not scared of a dick up the ass?

>>35527868
Absolutely love those two, if we stay up they're gonna become heroes.

https://youtu.be/IyRJZqEGW3Q?t=6s cracks me up

>>35527833
maybe she simply hasnt opened whatsapp and doesent know you have messaged her. sounds like you're worrying a little bit too much

>>35527912

No, but if my postcode won and I wasn't in on it then I would go mental.

>>35527948
i'd make sure they are clean so theres not much risk

if they use a condom what does it matter if theres a bit of poop?