Whenever I am confronted, I bitch out and giggle pretending that I took it as the other guy was just joking. For some I can't push myself to react to things aggressively, I can only pretend. I tried to desensitize myself to violence by watching disturbing/gorey videos online. I've watched the basic ISIS videos, cartel torture, rape, crush porn on dark web, even DD couldn't phase me enough to be more violent.
>I walk like a bitch.
>I have the voice tone of a bitch.
>I don't ever talk because I know whatever I say will just be immediately ignored.
>I don't bother trying to approach girls because I know that even if I get a gf, she will cuck me for someone manlier.
>I have taken martial arts and shooting courses.
>I lift weights everyday but people see passed my muscles.
>I am a coward.
>Been in a few fights but the other person had to hit first.
>I do nothing but workout, play video games, watch gore and jack off to porn.
In order for me to get mad at someone I have to imagine them skinning my family alive and watching scream and cry or fucking my oneitis and making her cum while I lay there tied up covered in blood, spit and piss.
When I am pissed off I hold it in until I get to the gym or watch someone getting murdered online. I can't keep living like a fucking pussy, I am the definition of a loser, I've never played a sport or achieved a fucking thing, I am nothing more than awkward fuck. I am /fit/ so I am planning on enlisting in the Marines which would hopefully allow me to release built up rage and be a more confident person and actually have something to be proud of. Help
Also I am only 5'9 which makes shit way worse.
>>35410256
>watching gore would make you more violent
why? it's the opposite. It's desensitization, do you know what that means? Did you honestly think watching gore would make you want to recreate the content of the videos? Do you watch a wild-life documentary and become a fucking biologist? You just get bored of gore is all it does.
>trying to force yourself to be a yelling baboon
being a pissy little shit is not cool. If you want to be cool, be indifferent to whatever confrontational shit happens to you
>>35410256
>Whenever I am confronted, I bitch out and giggle pretending that I took it as the other guy was just joking
What are you talking about. The other guy is probably being a gigantic pussy if he is acting like he's going to do something and doesn't want to go throw down somewhere discreet. After the confrontation, what I generally do is calmly invite him out somewhere to discuss things like gentlemen in private.