if you are so miserable why are you still alive?

SHE'S A CUTE! CUTE!!!! ^_____^

thankx for the lookies! :Dwas listening to the beatles and blinking at farewell to frogs when op unintentionally help me with current outing makeup look! thank you ~

https://open.spotify.com/track/0ESIjVxnDnCDaTPo6sStHm

>>35201790
My parents are the sole reason I'm still alive. Honestly, I don't want to let them down any more than I already have. Putting myself in their shoes, it would probably seem like the ultimate failure to have their child commit suicide. I don't want them to think they're bad parents.

>>35202158
This nails my answer to a t, they're the only reason I'm still living.

>>35201790
Killing myself will hurt my parents more than my failures already hurt them.

>>35201790
I love my Mom and my Dad and don't want that their last couple of years are filled with depressions and thinking about "What did we wrong?".

my life is pretty good, my parents are good people. i dont feel good thinking about how my parents would feel if i killed myself, i also dont think killing yourself is very dignified. im trying to come up with a way to die without anyone finding out what happened to me, like a missing person type of situation.

"But he that shall endure unto the end, the same shall be saved."
Matthew 24:13

I don't want to hurt the few people that care about me.
I don't want to be alive, but I don't want to be dead more

>>35202377
Fly to some random country, burn your papers and die over there

>>35202782
fraid i dont have enough money for that

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I wrote a novel where a character kills himself. It's the only way the main character can fill a spot to tame the black dragon. He does so successfully, but he ends up getting captured and taken to a circus where the clowns are literally growing marijuana underneath the tent.

Long story short, fuck you.

>>35202377
join the military on the front lines. Honorable death, get in shape, free board and food

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>>35203076
Published? Hosted online?

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>>35203111
You might even find purpose

>>35201790
either this girl is a striking look a like or I went to highschool with her.

>>35203125
Not published. The first arc is so shitty compared to the rest and I'd need to rewrite it first. I hosted it online.

I'm so scared to share because if I give an inch, I'm going to end up with 300 pizzas at my door and I'll end up in bankrupcy.

Not to worry, I'll be gone soon. Probably gonna drive to some parking lot and take a bunch of pills so it isn't my parents that find me

>>35202158
>I don't want them to think they're bad parents.
Too late.

>od'd on tylenol yesterday

>went to the hospital because I'm a bitch

>whole time there's a cop next to me

>had to spend the night in a mental hospital and completely faked that I was feeling better and not going to try it again

>now back to shit posting on r9k about to do it again

>>35203473
they just let you go? Seems kinda irresponsible.

Why did you fail? Just bitched out and got your stomach pumped? Asking because I might kms this way

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Just to suffer. Mostly.

>>35203555
nah right when I took it I realized I did it off impluse, on account of finding out my gf cheated on me, so I drove to the hospital. I just had to take a anecdote.

yeah I acted completely normal so they let me out.

>>35201790
because of pretty ladies.

Honestly... I don't know. I'm going to be dead soon anyways. My entire life was a lie and I'm nothing more than a tool to be used by some secret world organization bullshit.

Life got weird really quickly.

I want to die just to piss my parents off.

I just don't know a way to die fast and painlessly.

>>35201790
Too much of a coward to try again

It would destroy my mother, and I wouldn't want to do that to her

>>35203417
Obviously, jackass. But don't you think they'd be further disappointed if I were to kill myself? Its like you don't have common sense.

Because what if I kill myself and it's like that movie Jacob's Ladder. Fuck that shit.

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Basically because I'm a coward. Not even because I'd make my parents feel bad. Why the fuck would I care about that, I'd be fucking dead.

Because there are still things that make me slightly, fleetingly happy. And I have hope that things could get better. It seems to diminish every year though.

several reasons
1. i adopted a dog to ensure that id force myself t stay alive for at least 10
years. i dont want him to be taken to another kill shelter and have the same
thing happen to him. he deserves happiness and a home rather than dying in
a concrete building scared
2. too much of a coward. "friend"/acquaintance killed himself back in october
and im jealous that he had the courage to tap out
3. afraid that id miss out on something good but it feels like nothing good will happen

but at least i have a dog that loves me

>>35201790
too miserable to die

>>35203040
Walk to a random country then.

luma goethe is an angel! ah she walked in my friends runway and probably knows him !! (he did an earlier season) so cool :)

>>35201790
scared of what comes next

>>35202158
>I don't want them to think they're bad parents
my moms a hoarder and my dad doesnt do anything to help her fix herself. they had my siblings removed from home in 2014 by DFACS. i'm a depressed shut in with no friends whos only social contact is the weekly therapy appointments. we're beyond bad parents