I Don't Want To Be A Chad. And Neither Should You

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I have come to accept that I will never be "normal" or a normie and I feel much better.

>Love will never come easily to me, as I am not super attractive and much suffering in adolescence has robbed of the ability of connecting with women (I don't hate women, I just... can't relate to them easily).

>I am a vain, but not heartless. My own suffering with pornography addiction has made me very passionate about the topic, and I wish to help in the fight against these (((dark forces))) trying to push sex obsession on our society.

>Being involved in my local church has helped me feel connected to something bigger than myself, and it is through this that I have found some peace for the darkness in my heart.

>I have slept with prostitutes as a way of understanding sex but also stopping my mind from obsessing over sex 24/7. It has worked and helped me concentrate in school without obsessing over "lulz Stacy is banging Chad, why am I not having as much sex as Chad?".

>I am not nihilistic, I legitimately believe there is much beauty in this world, but as someone who will never be a normie, beauty will have to be more than "Lulz XD Me and Stacy in the grand Canyon, can I get some normie likes? XD

>I see my damage as a blessing, it has damaged me to the point that I don't see the "Chad" lifestyle as a goal, rather as something to overcome by finding meaning in other meaning in life, like internal-peace, no debt, spirituality, financial independence.