>mom found the semen swimsuit My life is over

this is quite possibly the most vile sight to have visited mine eyes.

did you buy it or steal it from some girl?

>>35133280
>being this much of a newfag

OUT OUT OUT

>>35133302
just because I'm a newfag doesn't mean I don't have brain problems

Disgusting fags. This is why you guys can't get gfs (not that I should be talking but still...)

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>>35133241
Your existence is a crime against humanity.

>>35133374
Literally fucking kill yourself, you stupid faggot

>>35133280
>>35133404
>>35133418
N E W F A G G O T S D E T E C T E D

>>35133241
If this was in an RPG what stats would it have?

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>>35133241
>sukumizu
good taste anon

>>35133241
it's a jacksoff pollock

but more heartfelt

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>>35133241
>Uncle found the anus a l'Anglaise

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>>35133241
>Not using tissues/wipes
>not even bothering to clean the damn thing
You brought this on yourself moron

>>35133241
Dude holly shit........

>>35133458
Probably shit tier defenses
But it prevents any enemy from hitting you with a physical attack

>>35133458
It would be the greatest item the last boss drops

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>>35133241
Greatest Sememsuit ever.

>>35133241
>>35133554
>>35133645
Oh hell naw I was eating sardines bro

>>35133554
Cant u just fap to porn on internet?

>>35133241
I am fascinated, how much work was put into this
whats the size of the swimsuit, looks chil size
how old are you

details, dont leaving hanging, your life is already over

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>>35133675
I'll save you from your appetite

>>35133374
>doesn't mean I don't have brain problems
you obviously do because you cant keep your bitch mouth shut and annoy everyone

this is an excellent thread. r9k has really been hopping lately

>>35133241

What does it smell like?

How did you manage to hide the smell?

>>35133554
This is actually a good idea.
How well does the paper dry?

>>35133374
Wow

You don't belong
DON'T BELONG

>>35133889
>>35133554
Why are you pretending to be the OP of this thread?
>>35132687

>>35133822

I had an old fuck sleeve I used for like two years straight and never rinsed or anything. I kept it wrapped in a sock and stuffed in a lifesaves candy roll tin. It's quite strong and has a bit of an ammonia quality.I threw it out once the thing finally split. I guess I'm just too much for her to handle. I wish I'd taken a photograph because the material was warped and the color had actually changed towards the back where the cum seeped into the whatever material it is. Between the sock and candy tin it was tight as fuck. I loved that thing.

>>35133902
I guess I never had the makings of a varsity athlete anon.

>>35133554
This is actually a good idea.
Does the paper dry well?

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>nibling found the natiform nectarines

>>35133241
How did
>mom
React to this?

>>35133374
lurk more, there is lots to learn

>>35134222
Nothing of WORTH that is.
He's better off at reddit.

Oh so it was semen. I always thought it was vomit or something, but now I realize how stupid I was.
Reminds me of those days where I'd steal a boy's underwear for the same purpose.
I'd just use them like that twice then started wearing them myself though

>>35133374
muh brain problems!
im so depressed!
im a real robot!

You are NOTHING but a FAILED NORMIE. GET THE FUCK OUT =)

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I hope this isn't live right now.

>>35133241
No one will ever find me desirable enough to cum on a piece of my clothing for years.

America needs more female school shooters.

...what turned it yellow?

>>35133374
>being so new you admit to being a newfag

Absolutely digusting. Lurk more, you piece of shit, this only fucking standard we have here.

>>35133374
It's faggots like this that make the world a shitty place. I normally don't give pieces of shit like you advice, but I'll make an exception just this once.

>Never ask questions
>Lurk moar

>>35133241
Looks like potato salad my nigga

>mom found the cummie cubby

oopsie!!

>>35135694
now this on the other hand, this is actually appalling. I can't fathom any advice to give this man, any way to soothe his pain. That is darkness in its most primal form and I have no salve for the suffering and pain caused by this man

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>had a party at my house
>cute girl, among other people crashed at my place
>cleaning up the next day, find a sock
>its hers, pocket it
>use it to jack off
>it smells like shit

is it even possible to sink lower?

>>35133241
>>35133241
First time coming to r2k and my eyes see this. Fucking love it

>>35133241
>>35133645
>>35133742
Uhh I don't think semen is supposed to be that color...mine's always clear

>>35133241
You know, sometimes you corrupt a symbol of innocence and purity so hard that it becomes a work of art

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>>35135694
I see /b/ is still /b/ sometimes

>>35135371
Faggot
originini

>>35133280
Yeah, the MOST disgusting thing I've ever encountered on this forum. Is this person retarded? Or making some kind of art?

Talking about art, did you see this one already. It's another masterpiece by "Tyger", Elliot Rodger's worst internet enemy:

https://youtu.be/JFGpEV129Eo

>>35133241
Is that a bad sign when your cum starts to turn yellow? I usually cum on my closets doors and I do it a lot so now I'm getting little streaks of yellow where you can clearly see dried up cum. Should I clean it or is it okay and just an appearance thing?

>>35136449
rotting semen turns yellow

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>>35133645
that looks like the radioactive pools in the glowing sea

>>35136894
How the h*ll can you live with your home decorated by your own dried excretion?

>>35136449
you've never had a cumrag, i see

>>35133241
>>35133645
I'm pretty sure that thing moves at night when you are sleeping.
Probably has severe depression becouse of the unatural and sick ways it was created
Pretty impressed it hasn't burned itself yet OP.

>>35133241
Thank you for the reminder to throw out my semen shirt, it's not too late for me yet.

>>35133241
>No fungus growing yet

Keep going faggot

>>35133241

Lol, I have a sock that was white but is now dark orange

>>35138106
post it anon

orignal komment

>>35133241
this is really ghorrble

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>>35133241
I must ask: How often do you wash it? If never, why haven't you?

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>About 9 years at the time
Not mine

I involuntarily grimaced

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it's good for cummy lummy

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>>35139816
Even the worst Senran doesn't deserve this. Shame on you anon.

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Is this a cum collecting thread?
It's unfortunate that isn't a loli swimsuit

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this raibu

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Got semen on her face

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>>35139465
>not knowing this is an old post

It's spring break so soon?

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>>35133482
>Being a newfag
>Thinks he has the right to smugpost

>>35133374
Look at all the yous you got. Master troll right here

>>35136521

What? That's r9k

>>35133645
Not a drop on the pussy liner, ya dun goofed...

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>trump found the taco tunnel

>>35136303
You underestimate yourself - joke aside anon , thrown it away pls

>>35133458
1/2


Slated Swimsuit
Small construct, lawful evil

Armor Class 14 (encrusted semen armor)
Hit Points 33 (6d10)
Speed 5 ft.

STR 12 DEX 15 CON 10 INT 1 WIS 3 CHA 1

Damage immunities poison, psychic
Condition immunities blinded, charmed, deafened, frightened, paralyzed, petrified, poisoned
Senses blindsight 60 ft. (blind beyond this radius)
Passive perception 6
Languages Japanese
Challenge 2 (450XP)

False Appearance. While the swimsuit remains motionless, it is indistinguishable from a "normal" swimsuit.

>>35141571
2/2


ACTIONS

Thoughts of waifu. Each robot creature within 60 feet of the swimsuit that can see or smell it must succeed on a DC 10 Wisdom saving throw. On a failed save, the creature is paralyzed and becomes aroused. The creature then begins to jerk off with the aim to shoot more ejaculate on the swimsuit. At the end of the creature's next two turns it can only repeat the save to try and free itself from the charm. It also uses its full speed and dash action to reach the swimsuit. Once reached, the save throw DC becomes 17.
-if one of these saves succeeds, the creature is free from the spell but suffers from "what would society think".
-if both saves fail and the creature has reached the swimsuit, the creature ejaculates on the swimsuit, healing it for 4d8. This results in two things:
First, roll a d20. If the result is 15 or higher, the swimsuit's armor class permanently increases by 1. This effect does not happen if the target failed to reach the swimsuit before ejaculating.
Second, the target must succeed on an intelligence saving throw. On a failed save, it is charmed for 1 minute or until it is hit again by the swimsuit. The target wants to stay as close to the swimsuit as possible and will defend it from possible dangers while taking 1d8 of psychic damage each turn. It can try to repeat the save at the end of each turn.

What would society think. Each creature within 60 feet of the swimsuit that is either not a robot or passed one of the follow-up saves explained above and can see or smell it must succeed on a DC 13 strength saving throw. The creature becomes aroused and then throws up, taking 3d6 psychic damage on a failed save and no damage apart from a feeling of immense guilt on a successful one. If the target is a robot, it can still be targeted by "Thoughts of waifu" afterwards. If not, it is immune to any of the swimsuit's attacks for 24 hours.

>>35133241
nice, that has to be a few hundred cummies at least.
is this for sale?

>>35141571
>>35141584
Oops, should have been linked to that one
>>35133458

>>35141632
Oh it is, never mind. I'm retarded. Natural 1, I guess it's time to jerk off.

>>35136449
mommy had to change wallpaper when I moved out because I left the cum tissues between the wall and the desk. The tissues stained the wallpaper to yellow. Of course mommy knew what it was because she had cleaned the tissues so many times when I was a school.

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>mom found the cum shirt
Feels batman

>>35133241
Good job fucktard
You should have Hidden it under the floor boards

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>>35141707
>Of course mommy knew what it was because she had cleaned the tissues so many times when I was a school.
>when I was a school.

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>>35141801
Why haven't we nuked Finland yet?

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>>35139763
>>35141801
So he wore that abomination in 2012 and still had it 3 years later... sheesh be he stil has it now

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>>35141979
He posts it on ylilauta occasionally.
Here's the original picture from kuvalauta

OP, please wear the cum swimsuit.

This thread is pure fucked. Dow Chemical couldn't whip up something thorough enough to burn that swimsuit off of God's green Earth.