I hate myself for being a 26 year old virgin. I honestly feel

Just get a prostitue

>>35115353
This.

Hookers exist for a reason.

>>35115353
That wouldn't change anything, I don't think. I'd still be a virgin, just one who had sex. As weird as that sounds.

Think of it like buying a trophy from a pawn shop, I guess? That sounds really misogynistic I suppose, sorry.

>>35115295
Either get a prostitute or stop complaining

>>35115389
No, I get what you mean.
But maybe it'll take some of the pressure away. It could help you realise sex isn't this big thing you've built it up to be.

>>35115389
>Think of it like buying a trophy from a pawn shop, I guess?
You get a trophy with money instead of effort... I don't see the problem here.

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>waiting that long to kill yourself
>probably will put it off another 5 years anyay

theres a window of suicide that you have to hit, anon. theres the 16 - 24 window and the 36 - 44 window. why wait?
you're 26 now and haven't had what most men experienced when they were 15/16. you're probably not normal. you're pre-disposed to depression and your genetics are shit. you're 26 and still don't have a decent job and career path, while many anons are younger than you and already have career paths, hobbies, gfs, etc.all that aside, you just can't acquire a gf and call it a day. you have no sexual experience, so any woman you do end up with, will know this instantly and be turned off. you've never been in love, you've never had a girl cry for you, you've never had a girl moan in ecstasy and shout your name to the heavens. you're a KHV, anon. so again, I pose the question, why wait?

>>35115408
Honestly, if I had sex with a prostitute, I'd just end up feeling much, much worse about it than I do now. I don't have anything against sex workers at all but paying to lose my virginity would just make me feel even more depressed and unlovable than I do already. It'd basically be admitting to myself that I'll be (romantically) alone forever, wouldn't it?

>>35115426
Come on, you know what I meant.

>>35115450
No, not really.
I consider it as ripping off the band-aid and getting something over with that's been a long time coming.
Whether or not you feel shit about it is up to you, it;s all about perspective. If you see it as you giving up, well then yeah you will get more depressed, but if you see it in a more positive light it'll make you feel better.
Just think of it as GF practice, or just getting it over and done with to see what the fuss is all about. It's entirely up to you whether or not it'll be a good or bad experience.

hey man, at least youre not in danger of stis. i envy you, frankly.

>>35115492
To add onto this how often do you do things that are outside of your comfort zone?
If you do this it'll add life experience and perhaps even give you a funny story to tell. It may also build character and help you overcome some of your other fears.

>>35115295
>The fact that no matter how many more friends I make
Virgins dont make friends.

I think eventually you have to accept that you are a person who can't adapt to the circumstances of modern society. Im sure it seems so depressing that you've failed in what ways you have but hopefully yoj find the strength someday to just stop playing this torturous game. I certainly wish I could do it.

>>35115295
literally what difference would sex make to your life? you have sex and what then

ill probably remain a virgin for life by choice

>>35115536
I feel like I regularly try to do things that are outside of my comfort zone over the past year. Like today, I went dancing with friends at a bar for the first time ever, and I *NEVER* dance.

It's just the fact that I keep being exposed to the normie world that makes me realize just truly how much of my life I've missed and how I'll never be able to achieve even the minor things I want.

>>35115550
I'm pretty good at making friends which makes this suck even more.

>>35115572
I can't decide what would be more painful; Finally admitting defeat and giving up, or continuing to flounder with (false?) hope that one day, I'll be able to find a woman who would actually be attracted to me and want to have sex with me.

>>35115295
1. If you're complaining about it on 4chan, you're not increasing your odds of getting laid.
2. The fact that you're bitching like that and looming suicide in the distance tells me you're a fucking coward. Either do it now or don't do it at all. Quit wasting everyone's time.
3. Fuckin get over sex. It's not the end all be all.
4. Work on yourself until people want to be around you and want to have sex with you. It's not that difficult to find a similar person with a similar level of your autism and breaks the scale just as much as you.

This is coming from a successful marriedfag.

I'm a 26 year old virgin as well.

We'll get there.

>>35115632
>3. Fuckin get over sex. It's not the end all be all.
>successful marriedfag
fuck off normo. Your advice is literally pointless, it's the same as successful billionaire would say that money isnt everything.

>>35115608
Are you kidding? It would make a huge difference. Not being able to have sex by 26 is failing so many social cues that you can't really expect to be able to bounce back.

>>35115632
People wanting to be around me and wanting to have sex with me are two entirely different things.

I actually have a good amount of friends/acquaintances (I'm closer to a cyborg than a robot) and I'm pretty good at interacting with and meeting people. People regularly tell me how funny and charismatic and etc I am.

None of that really makes any difference though when it comes to women being sexually attracted to me. I hang out with a good mix of men and women, but that makes no difference. I can't really say that I blame women though; they could do so much better than me, so there's really no reason why on Earth they should settle for me.

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>>35115646
Is "there" the buffet line?

>>35115632
>>35115685
Also, it often feels like the people who say things like "get over sex" are almost always regularly having sex. You really can't ever understand how much it tears an adult virgin up inside.

>>35115685
>it's the same as successful billionaire would say that money isn't everything
It's only when you have something that you realise its true value. People naturally want what they can't have then when they have it they no longer care as much.
We live for the hunt.

P.S. Not the guy you replied to.

>>35115730
I'm an adult virgin and it doesn't bother me all that much. It's the least of my numerous other problems.

>>35115710
"They could do so much better than me."

Low self esteem isn't attractive. I bet you say that kind of shit to women all the time.

If women get close to you and then dont seal the deal. you're spending time with the wrong kind of women.

>>35115685
You don't know me. I spent the first 23 years of my life choosing to stay a virgin just because I wanted to play hardmode through highschool (turned out to be easy mode)

I know exactly how the fucking world works because I chose to be wherever I wanted and know both sides of the coin.

Also first time I've ever been called normo. Made me chuckle.

>>35115767
>People naturally want what they can't have then when they have it they no longer care as much.
That might be true but not for a guy who's on verge of dehydration in the middle of desert.

>>35115767
Well, why doesn't it bother you that much then, if you don't mind me asking? I have a lot of problems too but my virginity and my inability to ever feel lovable is on the front of my mind regularly. It's not uncommon for me to get depressed for 10-30 minutes daily about being a virgin.

I think maybe part of the reason it bothers me so much is because it's such a hard "pass/fail" thing rather than "Do I have any career prospects?" or whatever.

>>35115793
Sex isn't fucking water idiot. You don't need it to live.

>>35115815
>You don't need it to live.
Yes and mental health isnt important. We dont live in post-apocalyptic world where only basic needs has the biggest priority.

>>35115833
You can be mentally healthy and not have sex. fire off a wrister and get back to business.

>>35115815
>not needed to live
But needed to continue life

>>35115793
That's life or death though.
Whether or not your weewee gets wet isn't life or death.

>>35115814
I have intimacy and trust issues, and almost nothing going on in life. I know that I would be a shitty BF at this time in my life so I don't see the point in getting sad over something that would inevitably fail and make me uncomfortable.
Instead I focus on myself and how I can better myself as an individual.
I'd rather love myself than have someone else love me.

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>>35115854
>You can be mentally healthy and not have sex
>mentally healthy
>unfulfilled basic sex need

>>35115859
There are 7 billion other people on this planet. You think getting your rocks off is that important in the grand scheme of things, you're deluding yourself.

>>35115785
I don't say those kinds of things to women. If anything, I'm really good about putting the "best me" out there when I'm with women and always presenting as really funny and likable.

I only ever talk to my male friends and random online strangers about my (admittedly very truthful) "she can do so much better than me" thoughts, and even then, I don't really talk about them to IRL friends, just online friends.

>>35115854
The sex ultimately is not the real problem, it's just the mile marker. The thing that really hurts me is knowing how completely unworthy of love that I am. I'd infinitely rather be in a loving relationship where I also never have sex with my girlfriend than have hot casual sex with strangers. Especially since I often feel that because my sexual prime is long since over so it's probably better if I just never had sex anyway. That way, at least I won't know what I'm missing.

>>35115572
I know it sounds stupid, but to adapt to the circumstances of modern society, you've got to take the initiative and be willing to feel pain over a long period of time. I was and still am a robot but using exposure therapy and meditation has shifted my life considerably. It's hard to really explain to online people, but you don't need to accept circumstances. You can adapt to them. But what the fuck ever, friendo. Your choices are your choices. This is just what has worked for me. I might be completely wrong and die in a gutter.

>>35115892
>not wanting to continue your line
the fuck is wrong with you? Would you rather have rednecks to have one kid than having one yourself?

>>35115899
>loving relationship where I also never have sex with my girlfriend
relationship without sex is a mere friendship.

>>35115886
See way down there at the bottom? sex. That's busting a nut. doesn't need to be with someone else. Around the middle mark. Love. Ever gotten a hug before? That's caring from an individual. mashing fleshy bits together means literally nothing without emotional attachment. you don't want sex. you want someone to connect with on a deeper level. Thats never gonna happen if you have your head up your ass and are constantly telling yourself about how much of a loser you are.

>>35115892
>you think getting your rocks off
Didn't say anything about "me". My statement was as depersonalized possible. You're taking this very serious, you should calm down.

>>35115934
Sex isnt the same as masturbating.

>>35115833
>>35115854
Having a good sex life can contribute to your mental health.

Depending on who you are though, if you don't consider prostitutes like "really" losing your virginity, then I think you should just work on being patient, keep making friends, and be more upfront when you like someone. You'll feel much better about the sex and what you took away from the experience.

By upfront I don't mean telling them face to face right off the bat, but if a girl you're friends with is really appealing to you, try to let her know, and if you fuck up play it off as a joke. Find humor in your failure, modesty, not everybody bats a thousand.

I'd also suggest if you're even a little bit bicurious being open to men as well, it'll be just as "valid" as with a girl even though people don't think it is, however if not then obviously don't bother with it.

These sorts of things aren't _entirely_ in your control, only partially cause life's a fucking bitch. Keep that in mind and good luck.

>>35115914
I'd actually rather that we have to go through an application process to weed out idiots and generational diseases to ensure that humanity was better off, even if it meant I couldn't have a kid.

>>35115913
I honestly just feel like all I do is suffer more and more new kinds of pain. I'm almost numb to it in a weird way. Or at least used to it and expecting it. It's another part of why I want to kill myself at 30 even though I don't want to - if this is all my life will ever be, I don't know how many more years of pain and being unloved that I could possibly take.

>>35115926
I know, I was just making an exaggeration to get my point across.

>>35115934
Yeah, and what do you see on the same tier? Sexual intimacy. Aka romantic love as opposed to platonic or familial love as it also lists on that same tier.

>>35115969
Each tier has multiple examples of things you need. Meaning they are interchangeable as long as they are in the same tier.

>>35115989
You cant change sex with something else because it requires 2 people while you can do other things by yourself.

>>35116002
The pyramid is saying you should have as many of these as possible from each but if you're missing some, that's fine because these other ones will help your mental health in the same manner.

>>35115295
Should probably look into the first 3 words of your paragraph. That will literally tell you why women wont sleep with you.

>>35116059
Tsk, if you're attractive then you can hate yourself as much as you want and women write that off as a cute quirk.

>>35115959
I just feel like I project this aura of never being able to be loved by a woman. I know it sounds really dumb, but that's the best way I can explain it right now.

And I'm 26. I've been making tons of new friends and going out to bars and doing my best to appear as a normie for well over a year now. How much longer do I have to "keep being patient"? It just... feels like there's no reason why any woman would ever love me when she could do so much better than me. That I make so many friends because the bar of entry for "friendship" is so much lower than a relationship.

And incidentally, I am kinda LGBTish but sex with a guy wouldn't be "valid" to me for losing my virginity anyway.

>>35115989
They are certainly not interchangeable. For example, you couldn't swap food with sleep and be equally satisfied with only one.

>>35116059
I'm pretty sure the dark brooding bad boy is one of the more popular archetypes that women are attracted to.

But I hide away all my depressive/etc aspects so your point is kinda moot anyway, really.

Honestly, my upsetness (not a word, I know) over being a virgin gets so intense at times that I've been thrown into depressive moods because I happened to see a sex scene in a TV show and I was reminded that it's something I'll never have.

Which sounds really bad when I type it out like that.

>>35116083
So, what does that have to do with you? Why does it matter if someone else has it better than you? Someone will always have it better than you. Hating yourself does nothing for you. Enough people in the world are going to hate you (including me). There is literally only one person in the world you can make for 100% sure love you and that's you. It takes a lot of work but its possible for anyone. Because if you don't do that. Why would you expect anyone else to?

>>35116158
>I've been thrown into depressive moods because I happened to see a sex scene in a TV show and I was reminded that it's something I'll never have.
I kind of understand this. I get upset over a game in which you can have sex easily but then you remember that you live in the real world. I'd like to avoid sex and emotional scenes in whole, atleast i wouldnt feel that bad about having bad luck in not being at right place in right time when it comes to sex. Uglier and more awkward guys had sex because it was their destiny or good situation.

>>35116115
If you're hiding aspects of yourself. Then they wont be loving you anyways.
Dark brooding bad boy may gain attraction but it doesn't make women want to marry them. You think that they want to be with someone who's depressed 24/7? Does that sound appealing to you?

>>35116173
>It takes a lot of work but its possible for anyone.
It's not possible - i have zero redeeming qualities. I'm an abomination which shouldnt be on this world in the first place. I'm like a cruel joke.

>>35116115
I know I can't convince you but sex with a guy YOU LIKED would be "valid", it's in an entirely different league. The only thing that matters for you to stop feeling like such a virgin is that you connected with someone on such an intimate level it involved genital contact. Some people would say penetration, but I think someone like you should just take it easy and slowly after you finally get a foot in (this obviously goes for girls too).

It's not that hard to make friends, but it is harder to make good friends. People that are more than just those you hang out with, those you trust. I don't mean people that you can blurt out your oddities at, but people you can lean your shoulder on when shit hits the fan.

And it works both ways, that you're there for them too, but don't get taken advantage (being nice isn't being taken advantage of though, I just mean both parties are putting out as much for each other).

There are men that do get sex and still feel like they're "not good enough" for women. That part is all on you, hell it's possible you might get laid, feel more confident in some ways, but still have that bit of doubt. It's just a bunch of bullshit you gotta not worry about. Easier said than done I know but things should change over time.

>>35116242
Did you yourself not say you're funny and charismatic?

If you have no redeeming qualities then shouldn't you start building some? I mean. You're apparently literate. Assuming you're human you have arms, hands, feet, legs, eyes... ect. Start working with that. Maybe start working on your physical fitness. You can control that. You can work on becoming funnier. You can learn to become a doctor or a rocket scientist.

>>35116227
I'm hiding the *negative* aspects of myself. That's what you're supposed to do. "Just be yourself" really just means "be the best version of yourself that you can be".

>>35116248
I just... wouldn't count it as valid to myself. I'd still think of myself as being a virgin with women, and since I *greatly* prefer them, that wouldn't help anything anyway.

I'm sorry I sound so pathetic right now, ugh.

>>35116286
He didn't say that; he's not the OP, I am.

I'm funny and charismatic, yes, but none of that ever crosses over to dating. Everyone I meet likes me instantly, but nobody ever loves me. Again, in large part because the barriers for entry with "friendship" vs "relationship" are so different.

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>you missed out on love in your youth

This feel gets me most upset.

Future school shooters: the thread

>>35116286
I wasnt OP. It's too late to build something meaningful. I'm here just to observe my downfall and eventual death.

>>35116288
Do you know what an intimate relationship is? Its showing who you truly are, flaws and all. Getting depressed, scared, angry is part of being human. If you can't trust and share those things with someone then you aren't being yourself. (To clarify that does not mean directing those things towards others but being able to express and share those feelings.)

>>35115389
>sorry.
You should be for implying a prostitute is a trophy.

>>35116349
How old are you? You know humans live to be in their 80's right? if you didn't do something in the first 30 years, you likely have another 30 in you to do it anyways. Don't care if you're OP. It applies to humans.

>>35116367
I'm not the person you're replying to but i cannot have intimate relationship because to me it means surrendering myself into submissive position to other person. I cannot let that happen where i'm not the one in control.

>>35116409
You know there's chicks who are into that right?

>>35115295
Being unattractive isn't your fault, and you aren't unattractive because of your actions or behavior so quit blaming yourself and move on. Women are inferior beings created to serve and please men. They are servants and helpers to us, they aren't worth much. So quit obsessing over them and find happiness without them. Obtain higher goals than wanting to insert your genitalia in the slimy dirty cave of a woman with a self inflated ego because she was born female.

>>35116429
>You know there's chicks who are into that right?
That's the catch - i dont like being dominant in general as a daddy figure but i cannot surrender myself in the intimacy.

>>35116367
I understand that completely. But nobody ever, EVER, began a relationship by displaying their full self, warts and all. You open up to someone afterwards about your flaws, you don't openly display them.

>>35116404
Let's be honest: It's very hard to make huge, sweeping changes in your life once you reach your 30s. That's not to say that it can't ever be done, but that it becomes infinitely harder to accomplish.

>>35116468
Why can't you surrender yourself?
You don't have to be a "daddy" to be the dominant figure in an intimate relationship.

>>35116494
>Why can't you surrender yourself?
I just cant, i fucking cant. I'm a complete loser who has no control in every other area besides this one and surrendering would mean mental death to me. I've never been in relationship but i'm afraid that i'd be abuser there because i have this deep hatred for women in general (madonna/whore complex). And, yes i'm going to therapy.

I should honestly try to get some sleep soon, and when I wake up, the thread will likely be purged. But please continue to make posts, because even if I might not be able to respond to all of them, I will continue to read them tomorrow when I get up. Thank you.

>>35116493
Its hard to do something so the better alternative is to hate yourself and complain about it?

Its not sweeping changes. Its 30 more years of slowly building into something. Start small. Even if its just learning how to schedule things. Literally just start out by planning things for a year. Then once that is a habit ingrained into your brain you change what you plan. Plan workouts, plan reading sessions, plan night school. Then create other small attainable goals. Do some pushups, do some more pushups. Learn to balance on one foot. Stupid small shit. Eventually you'll be doing better shit. Walk on your hands. Build a robot. Whatever. Just make sure its something you enjoy.

>>35116527
Well. At least you're going to therapy for it. Best way to handle shit is starting small then working up to bigger things.
Being afraid of being an abuser means you actually care about not hurting other people. Which means you're less likely to actually be abusive in a relationship. Key is communication , trust, and honesty. In fact allowing yourself to get close to someone would probably help you get over those fears and develop less of a hatred towards all women.

>>35116628
>In fact allowing yourself to get close to someone would probably help you get over those fears and develop less of a hatred towards all women.
It doesnt help that i'm 24. It's not possible to find someone close who would be willing to take all those "punches" from me.
>you actually care about not hurting other people
I'm actually afraid of myself because i know that deep down in my unconsciousness lies a monster or a beast who wants to be released and unleash all that anger and sadness that i've accumulated throughout all those years. I'm afraid that i might do something unimaginable like letting "true" me out for whole world to see and be punished for it. I'd say that now i just exist - adapt and show "different side of myself" to each different person. However i cant shake the feeling that i'm a hollow person who doesnt know what his real character is.
Sorry for blogpost