>match with a solid 7.2 on Tinder >open up the message

i think you shouldn't overthink it so much. she might even not answer at all anyway

>>35053826
You have to be strictly outgoing
Don't spill your spaghetti from the beginning with the "hi beautiful :)" bullshit, instead send a, "Aye hottie," or "What's going on babe" confidence, whores (girls) love to be treated like shit

>>35053826
"wanna smash"
It's the most popular opener apparently according to that one article I can't be arsed to look for

>>35053910
Lol, fuck that, jus b ursekf.

>>35053826
how about "hey" or anything non autistic and non cringe

>>35053826
r/tinder

File: Screenshot_2017-02-22-14-48-45.png (313KB, 1440x2560px) Image search: [Google]

313KB, 1440x2560px

oh god

what do i say next

>>35054221
like how did she not get the joke

>>35054221
"sorry, my autism flared up. i bet your hair smells nice and not burnt"

>>35054221
"cuz its lit af senpai "

>>35054221
"You're like a calcium flame: red and hot but not very bright"

>>35054221

Cuz it's hawt af.

>>35054221
What the fuck retard???

File: Screenshot_2017-02-22-14-55-16.png (330KB, 1440x2560px) Image search: [Google]

330KB, 1440x2560px

Where do I go from here? Seems like I'm dealing with a real genius

>>35054221
cause it's red
lmao

just be like whats up

Post tabbed and autoed, waiting for autistic fail.

>>35054348
Simply ask for her contact information

>>35053826
i request nudes to add to my 1tb+ amateur nude collection so that it will get lost somewhere in the jungle of trash data, however if you get lucky i may end up jacking my 2 inch cut cock to a photo of your tiddies.

>>35053826
" so how does this work? Are we dating now"

File: Ariana-Grande-Hot-2.jpg (282KB, 1800x2700px) Image search: [Google]

282KB, 1800x2700px

I made you laugh. Are you my gf now?


Send that with a winky face

>>35054348
Attractive and nice, but can she make finger snacks?

>>35054590
>>35054611
I just said "So how's life treatin ya". Still awaiting a reply. It's been 12 minutes.

Fuck, I wish I had said one of these, that's good shit anons.

File: dyudrk.jpg (50KB, 640x360px) Image search: [Google]

50KB, 640x360px

>>35053826
practice at omegle chat, usually you talk about things you like also watch this a few times:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vU-ibdHkz4Y

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_16yB7gxzeQ

File: bravo.jpg (29KB, 1024x536px) Image search: [Google]

29KB, 1024x536px

>>35054348
I'm pretty, you're pretty, let's go to my place and stare at each other.

>>35054685
Shoulda said this one OP.

12 minutes and she hasn't responded means it's over.

>>35054710
I couldn't have said that, because
i dont have my own place

>>35054667
i'm a virgin but i'm sure that self deprecating shit doesn't work

File: bravo2.png (62KB, 339x400px) Image search: [Google]

62KB, 339x400px

>>35053826
>>35054738
Are your legs tired?
>no why??
Because you've been running through my mind for over 20 minutes.

>>35054685
>>35054872
This anon has the right idea. Be sure to attatch a picture of bravo too

>>35054941
You can't send pics in tinder.

>>35055311
also make a note of how you would send her a picture of johnny bravo but you can send pics over tinder so a phone number/contact info would be helpful (so you can send her johnny bravo pics, of course)

I cringed

I've been talking to girls on kik, tinder, snapchat etc a lot and get nudes a lot and this is pure autism

>>35055372
we are autists, give tips please

File: mvdtn8N.jpg (210KB, 1888x1320px) Image search: [Google]

210KB, 1888x1320px

>message window open for 20 minutes
>He doesn't know it notifies his match when he's at the message window

>>35053910
That is fuckingterrible and autistic advice

>>35053874
Fpbp

why are u spending so much time thinking? Just send something

File: Screenshot_2017-02-22-16-21-07.png (404KB, 1440x2560px) Image search: [Google]

404KB, 1440x2560px

She finally responded boys

>>35055953
Tell her it was treating you fine right up until the way she text gave you cancer.

>>35055953
both of you are a lost cause

>>35055953
tell her you recently inherited 22 million dollars

>>35055953
You're done might as well start baneposting for the keks

>>35055953
say "marry one, fuck one, kill one: me, hitler, me again"
ur basic shit is boring, she gonna leave u on seen in a day

>>35053826

Tell her your dick got mashed up in a factory accident, but it still works. She will be turned on my the novelty and she will likely ask to see it right away.

Now just mangle your dick with a hammer a little so it looks like you where not lying and get pounding that sliz

File: image.jpg (125KB, 1106x952px) Image search: [Google]

125KB, 1106x952px

>matched with qt while drunk
>be witty
>she says this
>panic
>delete account

File: hzerehgre.jpg (176KB, 750x1000px) Image search: [Google]

176KB, 750x1000px

Told this girl that I wasn't looking for something serious, she then said to me that was into anal, take note, most girls are on tinder to fuck.

>>35055953
Dubs and a succubus disembowels me tonight

>>35055953
I'm ok I just found my monster condom I thought I lost for my magnum dong.

>>35056178
sorry anon i dont speak terrorist

>>35056163
I hope one day me and you can fistfight and that way I can hit your ribs a lot

If that happens my only advice to you is to try to shoot me to the ground I can't grapple for shit

>>35056178
Please translate from barbarian Hun to English please.

>>35056203
this
demonstrate your value op

File: 1474925615832.jpg (12KB, 251x242px) Image search: [Google]

12KB, 251x242px

>>35056178
that image is stolen from one of the /deutsch/ threads over at >>>/int/

don't you have ANY shame joscher?

>>35056362
>sounds good :) I like 69, especially if you take a shower together beforehand :smirk:
>whats the craziest thing you have done in bed?

>nothing "crazy" yet, but I'm circumcized so I I'm going to claim that I last longer than the average. Kinda want to do some light bondage

>That sounds kinda nice, alright, wonna text me on whatsapp?

File: Screenshot_2017-02-22-16-53-42.png (437KB, 1440x2560px) Image search: [Google]

437KB, 1440x2560px

Seriously, how am I supposed to hold a conversation with this person

>>35056573
Shes just not that into you dad

File: 1486257161079.jpg (170KB, 652x720px)

170KB, 652x720px

>>35056573
she sounds very disinterested..... say something or try and ask something interesting

>>35056573
UR CONVERSATION IS BORING AS WELL. say something funny, and give her someone to reply on.

>>35056573
By not talking like you're trying to make small talk with someone you're not allowed to talk adult things like a church group or children.

Say "or you could come over and I could get pussy wasted"

>>35056573
bribe her with an offer of kit kats for some fuck

>>35056573
Why do you have a fucking bag of kit-kats? Are you some sort of insane chocolate bandit?

>>35054221

because you're retarded that's why

>>35056624
What should I ask that isn't cringey or weird

>>35056573
Ask her

"what do u know about being chocolate wasted?"

>>35056790
ask if she wants to suck your kitkat

>>35053826
sup ranga, come suck dick

my dick

>>35056573

"That wasn't a very confident answer." sounds like the most aut response to a question

>>35055628
Fuck off roastie, you know you'll react positively to it if Chad sent it

You guys give terrible advice

>>35056178
ISIS pls go

>original memein'

File: 1487622522309.jpg (63KB, 778x512px) Image search: [Google]

63KB, 778x512px

Are these constant tinder threads just stealth marketing for Tinder?

If no, you guys do realize virtually no one actually gets laid from Tinder and it's mostly just used by women to feed their ego... right?

Ask her to rate your fedora.

>>35056573
Just ask for her number given that you've had an ok conversation. Just keep it straightforward.

Say "Hi".

Bring up a topic that you matched for "Did you see the newest episode of X?" or whatever as an example.

>>35056634

Holy shit this. Funny and out of nowhere

>>35056573
desu if you can't hold a conversation with her without spilling your spaghetti, how are you gonna talk to her irl?

>>35056573
you just made her think you're a fat fuck

>>35056573
When girls give those short responses, they aren't really interested. You should see the Chad tinder threads, where the girls would respond in paragraphs sometimes.
Even if fake Chad asked something simple like "how are you?"

I'd say just move on, but you probably won't anyway.