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ITT: Things that make you a robot.

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Thread replies: 52
Thread images: 11

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>manlet 5'9
>skinny
>weird face with asymmetrical bolbous nose
>never had a proper gf
>friendzoned 3+ times
>literally incapable of doing mental arithmetic and in general retarded at math
>weird voice
>facial hair grows in strange spots
>of course, virgin at 21
>kissed a girl once and it was a joke "marriage" when i was 15, was a peck on the lips and that's it
>>
>5'4
>huge belly
>skinny arms
>incomplete hair growth on face
>shit eyesight
>lack of intelligence
>lack of strength
>literally never had a female friend except in childhood
>never had a gf
>all crushes friend-zoned me
>>
>>34956339
>things that makes you a robot
Just one thing
>born in the wrong country
>>
>19
>never tried
>can't be friendzoned
Still happy
>>
>6'0
>Fit
>Have had sex with about 6 or 7 different girls
>Have a fiance
>Have my own place
>Go to uni
>Have friends

But

>No job

This is why I'm a robot...
>>
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>>34956339
>skele build
>deep, sunken grey eyes with raccoon-esque eye bags
>no interest in any regular masculine hobbies
>very little social skills
>prone to outbursts of rage
>schizophrenic
>almost always show no expression, flat effect
>rarely ever leave room
>given up regular hygiene
>have difficulty trusting women
>KHV
>>
>>34956511
You're not a robot you're chad

oregano commento
>>
>>34956563
No I'm not. I'm a robot.
>>
>>34956569
There's an easy way for you to get out, you just have to get a job. You have plenty of social experience and you're attractive enough to have a fiance.

Real robots are trapped in a metaphorical pit of robothood, that would require much more effort to try to escape and live life as normal.
>>
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>5'9" (not really bad but certainly not advantageous)
>skinny, eat 3k calories a day but 120 lbs
>got circumcised at birth and am insecure about my penis because of it
>parents treated me like shit and all of my early childhood memories are of them being drunk
>older sister trained me to be a sissy and now I have sub fetishes
>I bite my nails
>ugly forehead, have to have bangs and long hair to look decent
>asymetrical face, mole on left philtrum
>failed penis inspection and got held back a year in high school
>modern feminism has made 90% of girls vapid sluts who I can't pretend to care about
>never had a gf and girls think that's a red flag maybe they're right but give me a chance ffs

>>34956511
You aren't a robot, I hope you are baiting.
>>
>manlet
>balding
>stopped NEETing for a deadend job
>no prospects
>no irl friends
>KHV
save me
>>
What the fuck? This can't be right. Every single one of your points applies to me except I'm 19.

Tell me your knowledge now future me, and prevent this from happening!
>>
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>>34956339
>poland syndrome
>bacne
>social anxiety
>0 friends
>>
>>34956615
Not baiting. I've been here since the board's original inception.

>>34956609
Finding a job is not that easy. I've applied to over 300. I have experience. Just nothing is hiring. And even though I have friends and go out I'd prefer to sit at home in my computer room with beers or a bottle of wine. I don't even know anyone I can buy weed from.
>>
>>34956615
I'm >>34956802

5'9 is fine.

You're over-estimating your calories or you're very physically active.

Girls don't really care about dick size or looks. Some do. Not all. It's a meme that this board perpetuates to keep everyone in a perpetual state of shared misery of the unknown.

I only had a mother. She was an abusive alcoholic too.

Just like she trained you to be a submissive faggot you can untrain yourself if you want

Ugliness is tough. Start lifting and stop caring.

Girls like weird quirky shit like moles. Really, girls like anything if they like you. The amount of girls who have tried to say "No Anon! Don't do that (get piercings, hair dye, cutting hair, growing beard, etc.) I hate it!" and then ending up loving it because it's on me is absurd. You should have learnt to ignore what women think by now.

Being held back is fine. I dropped out. Now I'm at uni studying law.

Yeah, a lot of women suck. A lot of women don't though. Don't rule them all out. Just work on yourself to make them like you.

Lie about not having had a girlfriend if it keeps getting in your way. Girls are suckers for various lines. Saying you've never cum from getting head almost guarantees you head if the girl likes you. They view it as a challenge. (It's actually true for me. Every girl who tried failed. They really suck at head. Even the sluttiest girl who got gangbanged that I was with)

You can do it.
>>
>>34956900
Wow, that's a pretty well thought out reply. I might not like what I read but I appreciate the effort you put into the post.

>5'9 is fine.
Absolutely, but as I said, not advantageous. Also the only guys I hang out with are 6'1 and 6'3, I can't help but feel a negative cheerleader effect making me seem like a manchild.

>You're over-estimating your calories or you're very physically active.
I don't think I am. My grandpa was 130 lbs most of his life, and he got lost in the woods for a week and dropped to 110 lbs despite bagging and eating a whole elk. Just have some crazy metabolism.

>Girls don't really care about dick size or looks
Nice to hear. Truly I don't believe a worth-while girl would care, but I still feel bad about it for some reason.

>Start lifting and stop caring.
I'm kinda afraid to lift, my dad got a hernia when he was young and only 140 lbs. Doc warned me to be careful because I would probably be at high risk for them too. At the end of the day I have a pretty good lean body, I don't think bulking up would suit me.

>Being held back is fine
That was a joke

>Don't rule them all out
Yeah, I'm trying not to do this. My sister's pretty cool now so I know that good girls do exist.

>Saying you've never cum from getting head almost guarantees you head
Kek, I'm writing that one down. I guess I could also lie about having a gf but I'm really not used to lying, also seems like something that could blow up cause my friends know I haven't had a gf before.
>>
>>34956339
>kissed a girl once
REEEEEEEEEE GET OUT
>>
>>34957126
>I don't think I am. My grandpa was 130 lbs most of his life, and he got lost in the woods for a week and dropped to 110 lbs despite bagging and eating a whole elk. Just have some crazy metabolism.
You may be healthy but if you are indeed estimating your calorie intake appropriately you may have a thyroid issue. If you're sure you're right please look into it. It can kill you.

>I'm kinda afraid to lift, my dad got a hernia when he was young and only 140 lbs. Doc warned me to be careful because I would probably be at high risk for them too. At the end of the day I have a pretty good lean body, I don't think bulking up would suit me.
Don't do deadlifts. That's the only movement I can think of that is common and that may cause spinal herniation.

>Being held back is fine
>That was a joke
Sorry. I thought the reasoning was the joke.

>Kek, I'm writing that one down. I guess I could also lie about having a gf but I'm really not used to lying, also seems like something that could blow up cause my friends know I haven't had a gf before.
I hate lying too but sometimes it's a necessary evil. I know that when I had got with a new girl (I had long periods between girls sometimes) I'd just say that it had been awhile to pre-empt the potential quick load blow. I once took weed and pills with a girl and couldn't stay hard for more than a minute. It was the second time we'd hung out. I explained it and she was cool. She was also the slut that I was talking about earlier. Girls are surprisingly really chill if you're just open and honest with them. I thought we were done and I'd be made fun of with all her friends. It surprised me. I bet it'd be the same for you too, anon.
>>
>>34956339
>kissed a girl once
Reee, normie go to facebook
>>
>>34956739
OP here, it'll go by in an instant. Make sure you lift.
>>
>abusive neglectful childhood in a literally condemned house with raccoons running around indoors, raised by psychopaths
>constantly bullied in every single grade of school because I looked and smelled homeless because of aforementioned childhood/parents

>saved up money, moved out, cut off contact with psychopathic parents, now have a house, a boyfriend, friends, a job, and everything I could ever want

I guess I'm a cyborg. From the outside, I look like one of those emotional success stories that gets told in books by celebrities about how they grew up in an unfathomable situation and turned out fine.
But I think everyone here knows that you can't have a ruined childhood and ever really be "normal" again.
For one thing, I'm always learning basic household tasks and how to do them, because we never had things like a washing machine, etc.
And I'm always socially out of my depth because I think everyone should be mad at me all the time, because my parents were definitely mad at me when I did x. X being literally anything.
Sucks being broken.
>>
>>34957227
>you may have a thyroid issue
Huh, thyroid issue makes sense. My dog had one (although he was overweight) and once he got meds his weight was perfect. I'm actually going to ask my doctor about that, thanks man.

>Don't do deadlifts
I guess I fell for the fit memes, I completely forgot people could bulk up with other methods. I'll do some research but I'm still hesitant to go for a muscly look, I kinda like my lean aesthetic.

I usually am very upfront with girls but it's hard to say whether or not that's had a positive effect. I know I've scared some away with it, also had a few talk shit behind my back. I guess if they like you they wouldn't do that, them doing that just proved they didn't like me and got them out of the way sooner rather than later.
>>
>>34957126
Not previous anon, but

You do realise the height "problem" is just a matter of different metrics? There's no shit thing in europe.

Either you miscount your calories in/calories out or you're violating the laws of thermodynamics.

If you lift with free weights and learn the form, there's nothing to worry about.
>>
>>34957372
>Huh, thyroid issue makes sense. My dog had one (although he was overweight) and once he got meds his weight was perfect. I'm actually going to ask my doctor about that, thanks man.
No problem man.

>I guess I fell for the fit memes, I completely forgot people could bulk up with other methods. I'll do some research but I'm still hesitant to go for a muscly look, I kinda like my lean aesthetic.
It takes years to get "bulky." Google 'otter mode' in pictures. It'd probably what you'd want. Or don't lift at all. Whichever makes you happier with yourself.

>I usually am very upfront with girls but it's hard to say whether or not that's had a positive effect. I know I've scared some away with it, also had a few talk shit behind my back. I guess if they like you they wouldn't do that, them doing that just proved they didn't like me and got them out of the way sooner rather than later.
That's the right attitude to have. Every guy hears no no matter what he looks like or his personality. I've never understood why the dudes on here were always so scared of rejection. But in hindsight when I was younger, I was the same exact way and suffered for it.
>>
>>34956339

>6'1
>Fit
>9/10 facial genetics
>had two proper gfs
>friendzoned 7 girls currently
>above average at math
>monotone voice
>fully functioning facial hair
>slept with 20ish girls in the past 18 months
>have arranged to hookup with a girl I don't know tonight but she hasn't replied since saying good morning
>>
>>34956339
Receding hairline weird fetish and popular people don't like me but that's okay because all the girls are really used up and fake looking. Starting to think I like not being a part of the party scene.
>>
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5'4 asian guy with a ugly face and a small penis born in scandinvia.

I was litterally destined from birth to become a robot.

Also 60-80 % of asian girls here are dating white guys including my cousins
>>
>>34957452
>tfw you've always wanted to try sucking off a small uncut asian but you've never told anyone and still consider yourself completely straight or at worst slightly bisexual
>>
>>34957472
Sorry bro when i finish uni i'll move to vietnam.... if i stay here i will certainly be klv for life.
>>
>>34957452
This guy is picking those mushrooms like a fucking autist. If you run them up from the ground like that, it can damage next year's harvest. You have to go down to the roots and gently twist them off or cut them out
>>
>balding
>KHV
>almost 25
>talk to females maybe once every few months outside of my mother

This is not what makes me a robot though, that'd be
>no friends
>high school friends moved away, one psycopath remains who is similar to me but super autistic
>barely even see him
>this would be okay but even my ONLINE FRIENDS started to give me the cold shoulder last year
I can deal with RL disappointment, but I always am reliving the memories of in HS when "friends" would ditch or bail on me. I just can't handle rejection and there's no way of escaping it with my tremendous failure of a life.
>>
>>34957496
Not too far from me. But it'll never happen :(
>>
>>34957735
Where are you from?

comment original 1234124
>>
>>34958545
Australia

origamioriginali
>>
>>34956339
>Manlet 5'9
>Chubby
>No gf
>Asymmetrical eyes
>Friendzoned 4+ times
>Pretty good at math
>girl voice
>girl hips
>Transgender
>Incapable of getting a gf
>Had sex tho

>tfw Android 18; a stacey in the body of a robot.
>>
>6'4
>Decent looking

>Severe schizophrenia
>Can't hold down job
>Can't trust people
>Bouts of psychosis randomly
>Too paranoid to even get on neetbux
>Too crazy for anyone to want to be in my life in any station
>>
>KHHS Virgin
>170 cm
>40 kg overweight
>Small penis
>500 hours in unmodded Fallout NV

Actually pretty comfy, senpai, althougt it gets lonely very quickly
>>
>>34959075
How small?

basil
>>
>5'7", 145lbs
>Balding
>Wristlet, voicelet
>Shitty dead end retail job at almost 30
>Depressed constantly
>Severe anxiety all the time which keeps me up at night
>Awful at math
>Asymmetrical ears
>Soft, yellow teeth; so constant cavities

But:
>Been in a relationship with a smart qt for seven years, and married for two.
>>
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>work as a male nurse (beta as fuck)
>fat
>get drunknevery day
>only play vidya, and only autism vidya like dorf fortress and victoria 2
>few friends who hate me
>>
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>>34959332
Depends, I think my benis would be normal sized if I wouldn't have all this fat on top of it, atm it is probably 3-4 inches

Also:
>ENTP/SCUAI
What can you deduct about me based on what I've tell you?
>>
>>34959396
That you need your little penis sucked and that I want to do it.
>>
>26 in 3 months and still on here
>have 3 best friends, 0 friends
>if I get the same opportunity and same start as others, always the last one to "get" it
>had 4 bfs, all betas
>everybody close to me in my life has told me that I have a certain sterility to me, and think I have some fundamental piece of humanity missing in me
>but I have a tight pussy, DD's and love good films and good games, so whatever

Being a robot is what you make it anons!
>>
>>34959430
Nobody cares cunt
>>
>>34959416
I would suck you off if I could too, although not in a repugnant faggotish way, like, a way two friends suck each other off...

Where are you from?
>>
>>34959498
Well of course. What other way is there? Australia.
>>
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27 6'2 159 lanklet. Assymetrical face, bad teeth, shitty eye area. Asocial, fail to interact with normies. Probably mildly autistic.


Don't care about anything anymore senpai. Too incompatible with normiekind, might aswell live like an animal.
>>
just left the house as 5 ft 7 n every woman i saw was taller than me

im fucking done
>>
>>34959548
Dafuck? GTFO Chad! That's almost Ryan Gosling tier.
>>
>>34959492
Yeah, but isn't that like, all posts here?
>>
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>>34959522
Fuck, I'm from Costa Rica... Do you have Steam?
>>
>>34959597
>Heh, but aren't I just like all of you? Do I fit in yet?
No. Fuck off.
Thread posts: 52
Thread images: 11


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