/depression/ general

I feel you OP. Same happened to me since i started u. I once wrote a story full of dumb stuff in which the protagonist dies in the most stupid way possible just when his adventure was about to begin. Long ago i tried to do a story as much as stupid as the last one, but it wasn't good enough...i don't think the deterioration of my imagination has to do with depression, i don't think i have depression anyways.

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>>34925939
I've become completely complacent in my depression. I accept that things will never improve; I find comfort in the hopelessness, because it is such a familiar feeling. I'm not even angry or sad anymore, just numb and bored. I do weird things to try to make life more interesting. One of my favorites is that I will eat very little for as long as I can, and then I'll finally cave to the hunger and be able to enjoy the food I decide to eat. I always get mad at myself because I end up eating way too much, and feel the need to go hungry for an extended period again. It's a viscous cycle. Despite this, eating tasty food after being really hungry is a very comfy feel, the only one I have left.

>>34925939
I pretty much live my life almost solely in escapist fantasies. I don't want to think about my life, I don't want to be in it. In the fantasies I make up entire worlds, cultures, histories etc, and just either watch the imagined people live there lives, or pretend I'm there. That I life in a world much better then this one. I hardly even know how to live among people in this world anymore, I've become this way though isolation, and deep distain for what our world has become.

>>34927511
Same dude. This exact same feel. Except I abuse Adderall in order to not be hungry. Also abuse other drugs in order to feel fucking something at least for a couple hours.

>On Discord with friends
>Havin fun and playing Siege
>Can't stop thinking about killing myself and how 8 years is too long to wait

>5th year uni student
>realized that i should do something that will get me a job
>do acct
>still 1 year to go
>gonna have to push it out further so i can do an internship and be guaranteed a job
>will become cubical slave for at least 5 years
>just wanna play guitar
>absolutely suck at it
suffering

I'd like to read some of what you faggots write. attach it as a pdf or something.

>>34927511
>>34928022
ffs, kek'd and this exact feel.

>>34928428
jager and mute are /our
guys/

>tfw nobody wants to talk to you
>bored of talking to myself