/britfeel/

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What are you lads listening to?
As usual I'm listening to Redgum.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5bL62Bx9zuE

Phew.. That thread trasfer was a little too exciting for me. Gonna have to have a rest .

>>34888557
>supposed to do 5 hours a day job search

You're supposed to, but they never hold you to that standard.

Simply say that you did and it's enough - it's then their onus to prove you're lying (nearly impossible and takes took long)

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who else trying to get hunky?
I'm sick of being a flab-bag.
My oneitis only like dudes with six packs. ;_;
I'm tired of chads getting my pussy.
IT'S MINE

who wants to lend me some money then?

>>34888642
me lad. i have a completely different routine though.

got a pretty decent body atm but i feel too skinny, maybe i am just insecure? i dont know. i find it hard to get big with out getting fat.

>>34888607
sad valentines day shit. still not over my feels ;_;
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Fi6zb8luxo

The ramen noodles I bought have no flavour so I thought I'd be a mad man and put another flavouring sachet in the mix and some salt. Tastes awful tbqh lads

Day 4 of 7 on my neet week off.

All i've been doing is watching tv shows and movies. What the fuck am i supposed to do ?

>>34888558
I have no connections and have no interested in venturing outside simply to acquire drugs when i can do it online (albeit at an inflated price)

>>34888578
>if i ruled the country, i would force you to join the army, enter a training scheme, or work voluntary.

Too bad your kind will never rule this country then eh lad? Despite everything Britain is very left leaning. Good luck trying to convince the public to agree to sending someone diagnosed with clinical depression and social anxiety into the fucking army.

This is weird but does anyone remember a channel 4 documentary from years ago where an alcoholic tries to go cold turkey and then starts to almost die on camera. Then the paramedics have to get called and they give him a beer and he just inhales the full pint in 1 second

>>34888666
holy fuck r u the devil?
who cares about getting fat? it's just added resistance and thermal insulation.
I JUST WANT TO GET STRONK.
bulking is supposed to help, rite?

Check out this gem I found while applying to KFC. This is a minimum wage part time job mind with no requirements.

>The Ideal Candidate Are you a bright, spirited person who loves to get stuck in, ask questions and support the people around you? Better still, are you energetic, do you like to smile and have fun together, even when things get tough? Loads of different people make KFC what it is today (the most popular chicken restaurant in Britain!) and they all play a huge part in our success from the Managing Director to our cooks. So how KFC are you? Have a look http://kfccareers.co.uk/how-kfc-are-you

Is someone paid to write this shite?

>>34888642
waste of time considering i'm a 5'4 manlet.

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>>34888649
How much do you want, goy?

>>34888607
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FH7wbYfNL78

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>>34888680
you twat. boil the noodles and fry it in the sachet powder with some veggies and oil n shit. fuck.
don't add salt, use garlic powder, turmeric, or something like that. damn.

>>34888708
it's to discourage the sort of people from here from applying

>>34888708
>do you like to smile and have fun together, even when things get tough?
kek, good find

>>34888642
Exercise bores the ever living shit out of me

>>34888726
I'm living off a diet of instant noodles, do you think I can afford all that shit

>>34888711
grrr, stop chatting shit... go lift some heavy shit RIGHT FUCKING NOW.
Preferably your own bodyweight. Do some pressups and squats. Alternate, rest, repeat.

how the fuck to you talk to girls? I've had some matches on tinder but I have no idea what to say.

>>34888714
I need 2000

>>34888704
>who cares about getting fat? i

it looks shit though. i do it to get strong and look good, bit of both. if i done it solely to beat up people, i would take up mma instead

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>>34888693
are you in the countryside or what?
would you like some pointers on acquiring dank goods?

>>34888523
I mainly wear undersized novelty t shirts from 10 years ago and one pair of jeans. Also only have one pear of shoes, they're New Balance. Play to my strengths? guess i could go for the shrek look if i get a bit bigger.

>>34888762
2000? Who do you want 1000 for? I can't believe you want 500. Oy vey, 100, it's too much!

>>34888773
I'm in a shitty town of a population of 75,000

But go on, if i can get some cheap cheese i'd be willing to catch a bus

>>34888760
The trick is to talk to them like you do your mates

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>>34888748
you dumbass, veggies are like 1 pund for a bag of them. That's comparable to instant noodles.
get thee to a market.

>>34888642
I'm coming at it from a different angle: spending a month-ish on doing 20 mins on the threadmill, 8x3x15, bit of everything (typically 3x upper body, 3xlower) Then a cooldown on the elliptical. I'm doing 15 to reintroduce exercise. I prefer lifting heavier but spending a month on conditioning first. Then I'll probably do split days again too. It's going to take about until the end of March to get my body fat down. Not too long really.

>>34888795
>"there was no romance there at all. We just didn't click. We're better off as friends"

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>>34888760
start with "hey sexy, what you upto?"

>>34888770
yeah, tru dat. but srsly, do cardio or something if you want RIPPLAN MUSSELS

>order chinese last night because fuck it, its valentines day
>have the shits really bad today
Now I remember why I don't get takeaways often

>>34888813
Then it wasn't meant to happen tbqh, you'll be cuckzoned either way. You just move on to someone else, if you're getting tinder matches it shouldn't be hard

>>34888795
Oh cool. Didn't know this. Can't wait to know who they main in melee and who their favourite pony is

>>34888795
but I don't have any mates

>>34888833
what was the name of your takeaway place anon?

>>34888808
Can you send us a couple of woolly hats when you're done mate? All that threadmill time is bound to produce more than you need.

alright lads. im the lad who got chucked out of his house by his mum, and then ended up on the streets when my gran chucked me out too.

got some good news. the council have found a nice little studio flat for me. and it looks like im going to get some generous bennies too because they said that the reason i got chucked out is enough to qualify me.

really good news. looking forward to just chilling for the rest of my days.

>>34888740
I felt this way too, but a good way to keep you going is watch something on TV/Youtube/Whatever to keep your mind occupied.

>>34888780
WUT.
What style are you aiming for, exactly?
Get some nice cheap clothes from china off ebay, or go to some cheapie trash clothes shop in the mall and get some
1) black trousers or ambiguous pants.
2) shirt-y things. should have collar/buttons.
3) some shoes/boots/smart footwear or nice flat trainers. should be dark.
4) other stuff

You need smarter clothes. Not formal, but just smart-ER.

>>34888872
Nice one lad.

Was in same situation, it's nice to have your own place to be a lazy neet in.

Just make sure to keep up on benie requirements

>>34888820
>do cardio

probs will in the future when i have strengthened my legs. if i done cardio now my legs would be too sore and i want to get strong legs

>>34888883
Cheap clothes just look cheap.

You need to buy expensive clothes to look good.

If you can't afford to buy expensive things then your life is a fucking mess, sort it out.

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>>34888808
yah man, go for it! hardcore, keep it up.
Pushing heavy weights naturally increases your breath capacity and stuff too. We'll get there in the end :p

>>34888883
Thanks for the tips. I'll look into getting some better clothes eventually. Just poor as shit atm. Basically just making do with what I have. I do want to start dressing like an adult. atm i look like a fat teenager with a bad dadhead

>>34888913
Tk Maxx is your friend there. Also mail order stuff like Charles Tyrwhitt for shirts etc. Or just wait for the sales and buy everything in one go. I tend to do a mixture of both, I absolutely hate clothes shopping.

Laddios, let me tug on your coat about something.

I've been on with the abstinence for 45 days. I was aiming for Easter. However, I'd got a caveat at the back of my mind: if my gf was away for two nights in a row or longer, I would drink again for that time. There was no reasonable expectation that it would happen and certainly not so soon. However, in about a month's time exactly such a scenario will come to pass.

I'm not made up as to whether I'm going to do it or not.

Plusses:
- It's what I had in mind to do albeit not when I inteded to do it
- I'll feel good for a while, I'll experience catharsis and for a rare span I might actually feel happy
- No one need know
- It won't harm my diet particularly

Minuses:
- I would know that I'd done it
- It would likely reset the dependency cravings
-It doesn't fit into my self-improvement plans and could possibly trigger a relapse

>>34888913
>>34888928
Any suit looks better tailored. A cheap suit that's been tailored looks better than an expensive suit that hasn't.

>>34888913
You are a fucking dumbass and extremely fucking wrong. (source: t. me)
You just need to shop around, and pay attention to the fabric, stitiching, and pairing/complementing different parts of your outfit so as to take attention away from lacking areas. Just like life really.
If you see enough variety you will eventually find something that looks good and is cheap.
You probably wants something like 5 to 20 pounds per article of clothing. A lot is luck in shopping desu but ebay makes things easier. Try looking for jeans around a tenner.
Also, keep up to date on online deals. You can get good shit when its on sale. You just need to shop around. With home delivery, it's easier than you think.

>>34888949
>Tk Maxx

All the lines that no one wanted to buy because they look awful.

>>34888979
>5 to 20 pounds per article of clothing

Pfffffff! You must look like absolute shit.

>>34888979
i want to put my willy in your bum

Anyone else find it difficult to finish games?
I'm o my fifth playthrough of LA Noire and I still haven't finished it

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Any other white lads got hairy hands and fingers?

not sure if i should shave them desu

>>34888913
Cheap clothes are fine as long as you shop around. My tip is to not buy cheap black jeans, they will fade in about 2 washes

Just got a tech support call to ask if I could help the accountants kid crop his fuckin meme picture.

And on the way back I stepped in fuckin gum. Why was that shit in the middle of the office.

>>34888979
Buying jeans for a tenner is a mistake. Almost all of the jeans i've bought which cost less than 20 gbp looked like shit, were thin as hell and ripped within a year. Invest in a pair for at least 30gbp but ideally more. You don't need that many pair of jeans and the expensive ones will look better and last longer.

>>34888920
Well you know, what I've found is that doing cardio drops off in a big hurry but increases the same way. Last time I did a consistent three months training my personal best was 11k over the course of 70 minutes. I'm back up to 3k now, and it'll get back up there. Already at the point where muscle fatigue is becoming more of an issue than being out of breath so it's looking good.

>>34889011
I have easily spent thousands of hours on GSG's and not once have I ever played a campaign to the end.

>>34888702
hahahah what the fuck that sounds hilarious

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>tfw buying clothes from charity shop like a pleb

I'm not gonna make it lads

>>34889038
Decent jeans are 150 quid minimum.

>>34888905
SQUATS

>>34888853
Yes, you have us. Practice. You WILL improve.

>>34888846
fucken kek

>>34888963
don't fucken touch me m8.
If you want to know what I think, I think you should work out or something, maybe do some creative writing or go for a walk in nature.
NATURAL HIGH BRAH

>>34888869
my sides :p

>>34889024
I disagree tbqh lad, I only buy NEXT jeans for 20-30 quid and i've had the same pairs for almost 2 years now

>>34889063
It's smart lad, barnados near me does 2 quid per item. Shit's great.

>>34889063
Charity shops are all the rage now, no joke

>>34888642
I'm doing couch to 5k, mostly for therapeutic reasons, but it'd be nice to lose some weight as well (I'm 6ft, 200 pounds). Though I'm not sure how much weight can be lost through just jogging/running and avoiding snacking outside of meals.

>>34889068
I am already working out. Diet and exercise in tandem when I'm not working.

>>34889089
As if some fucking nobody neet in the middle of nowhere would know what is "all the rage".

>>34889100
>Though I'm not sure how much weight can be lost through just jogging/running and avoiding snacking outside of meals.

Burn more calories than you take in.

Weight loss is simply that.

nutrition and being healthy on the other hand is much more complicated

I just wear band shirts and jeans like 99% of the time I'm not in work. Gets the job done.

>>34888760
if you don't know what to say its cos theyre boring.

>>34889052
Would also like to see that. Makes sense I guess, withdrawals can literally kill you

>>34889106
Charity shops have been hot ever since macklemore chap

>>34889127
5'5 14 stone. Overweight to be sure

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>>34889009
>Pfffffff! You must look like absolute shit.
not really.

>>34889010
I am sure that will work out for you.

>>34889011
Who gives a fuck. Grow up and make your own games. It's way more fun.

>>34889024
seconded. Unless you like that kind of thing (I do :p)

>>34889038
I will post pics to prove you wrong if you want to argue. I literally have, like, 5 pairs of jeans I got for a tenner or less. 3 of them from shopping centre, 3 of them off ebay, I think from china or sum shit

>>34889044
for real, impressive, but lift weights or your muscles will shrink. Just saying. Don't be skelly.
I can't do much cardio, certainly not as much as you. I wish I could tho.

>>34889063
post pics? might be okay if you use it correctly

>>34889023
I've got proper hairy feet and toes. They look like hobbit feet. Seriously the worst feet going.

>>34889139
Post a photo of your outfit right now, timestamped.

I guarantee you look like shit and you are just too autistic to realise.

>>34889136
>5'5 14 stone. Overweight to be sure
Yeah, you are overweight. Probably closer to obese. I am 6'2 and just under 15 stone, and I am definitely overweight

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>mfw I forgot LA Noire was limited to 30 fps

>>34889136
Which was fucking years ago.

The charity shop fad is long dead.

>>34889146
I shave my feet because of the hobbit meme.

Just unsure on the hands, part of me thinks it's manly, but it also can make you seem like a knuckledragger neanderthal also

>>34889100
drink water and eat raw veggies every day. Carrots, cucumbers and tomatoes, with skin (washed ofc)
Tomatoes are good for yer heart.
Cucumbers are watery as fuck.
Carrots got carotene and shit. N U T R I T I O N
Water = increase metabolism

>>34889106
hey, fuck you buddy

>>34889023
my body's covered in hair lad

>>34889166
I remember a time when it was frowned upon to be buying clothes from charity shops

>>34889120
How many calories does an adult male burn off passively each day anyway?

>>34889136
definatly overweight m8 im 6'2"@11.8 stone, the perfect weight for the height
>>34889157
you fat fucker where do you put the 3 extra stone

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>>34889154
Nothin personal kid. I bet you feel embarrassed now.

>>34889154
I put some pants on because of this post.
I was lying in bed in boxers/vest
Then I realised I don't need to prove it to you.
GOT BARE STYLEZ SENPAI U DON'T KNOW ME

>>34889208
http://www.calculator.net/calorie-calculator.html

>>34889208
Google TDEE. That will give you how many calories you need to stay the way you are. For weight loss, subtract 500 from that number and stick to that amount of calories.

The concept is very straightforward, but sticking to it is hard. Alcohol for example is full of calories and fuckes up diets.

>>34889139
Never gotten the motivational picture meme. Never really done anything for me.

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>>34889023
Nope, I'd hate to have hairy hands.

>>34889208
M E T A B O L I S M
How does it work?
(hint: you can activate and inhibit metabolic processes via activity/nutrition)

>>34889213
I know man. Mostly round the middle, go to the gym every day now and count my calories so hopefully I will be back to normal soon.

>>34889214
>he didn't change his clothes once in months of weight loss

>>34889250
F E M I N I N E H A N D S

You gonna tug me off lad?

>>34889245
more like self-hypnosis desu.
You create a mind in the image of your thoughts, a life in the image of your actions.
You just need the right angle. There are many different memes.

>>34889245
It doesn't do anything for anyone really. Just makes people feel like they're working towards productivity without actually having to do anything real. If you really want results, you make a plan and you follow that plan day in day out. Discipline is the only meme worth anything.

>>34889250
Those ladies need a bit of nail polish, sweetheart.

>>34889250
I have the choice lad, can simply shave them if i feel like it.

You however are stuck with those dainty elastic bands for life

Didn't think I'd make it this far
I only need to remain awake for another 60 minutes

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LOL this is totally you guys. Clean your shit up. If you don't want to be fat, or fucked up, DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT
I'm tired of shouting at you cunts.
PUSH SOME FUCKEN IRON RITE NOW.
NO EXCUSES. DO STAR JUMPS AND KNEE HIGHS. SALAD AND FRUIT FOR BREAKFAST ERRYDAY

>>34889319
You trying to reset your sleep pattern? Why not stay awake until like 10 if so? It'll be well worth it but feel like hell.

>>34889233
>>34889243
Thank you lads.
I don't drink alcohol, so I should be good on that front.

>>34889354
No, I have a doctors appointment at 4:15

>>34888686
smoke weed

aoerfmao[eifaepofkapwofkwpfokwerpfoiwepfoewrfpokmowefpom

>>34889363
Want to increase metabolism? Don't spend all day on your arse. It makes your body sedentary/hibernative.

>>34889353
All of this helps to an extent. Exercising and eating healthy healthy provides a base for your life. I mean, you're in your body 24 hours a day, surely spending an hour maintaining it is well worth it. But don't be fooled and think that this alone will fix you. If you're autistic or a social mess it won't help. It might draw people in if you look good enough but once they talk to you they'll think you're just overcompensating for your lack of personality. Focus on your brain as well kids.

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>>34889250
>no hair
>perfect nails

No scars also, never been in a good punch up? you must be a right bender

>>34889408
You've got weird hobbit hands mate.

bet they smell funny

cup of tea time lads. still a bit hung over desu

>>34889353
>posts an exercise regime for women

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FuX5_OWObA0

Want this to play at my funeral lads

>>34889459
Well fuck you.

>>34889455
concur

>>34889435
you're just jealous of his masculine hands. when women see them hands they think "i want that hairy finger inside me".

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>>34889408
better than being a fat fuck

>>34889435
>bet they smell funny
Wouldn't be wrong there lad

>>34889475
This anon gets it

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>>34888629
Can't decide if I'm insane or you guys are.

>>34889459
Exercising like a woman will be the better choice for you long-term. Its nice to get big and strong and ripped but over time it'll affect your joints and have a negative impact on your body. Human bodies aren't made to bear weight. They're suppose to be flexible, fast, able to endure long repetitive actions.

>>34889250
Bad mix desu, not masculine but not fem either. Numale level.

>>34889502
>fast, able to endure long repetitive actions
which requires muscle, retard

>>34889517
obviously, but not muscle to the extent which bodybuilders gain. A lean body is the idea body.

>>34889537
who is talking about pumping themselves full of roids so they can roll a 2 tonne stone ball up a hill?

>>34889537
>A lean body is the idea body.

that is what a women would say

it seems we have a spy in here

im watching you. i bet you're from tumblr, come to check how privileged men are. GET OUT

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quit arguin and start working out motherfuckers
that body aint gunna move itself

>>34889549
sisyphus leave

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>tfw started to rain
>tfw wanted to go for a walk
>tfw stuck in East Devon

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>parents expect me to get over my anxiety and depression that I've held for years, just two weeks after my suicide attempt
>they expect me to write up a CV and start applying for jobs again, with their help
I've JUST gotten a prescription for anti-depressants, I'm not exactly in the right mind to be talking positively about myself in my CV, or talk in a pressurized situation like an interview, am I?

>Trying to write a CV
>Almost finished writing down everything that is both a) true and b) necessary for an employer to know.

And it's barely half a page long. How the fuck is this supposed to fill out two sides of A4?

>>34889606
just let it go
you're not a special snowflake

>>34889613
pad it with waffle

>>34889613
>two sides of A4
That is where you fail, anon. A CV should only be 1 page (not including your personal statement).

do you guys always bitch at EACH OTHER?
"you're fat fuck"
"you're gay"
"you're feminine"
FFS work together or be destroyed by feels.
Also, dress nicely, work out, and model your life as a hero in your own story.
Stop fighting each other, fight your ego, look after yourself, eat properly and move your body like the sexy beast you were made to be, like your ancestors were, like you know you can, and do it better, yeah, do it better than. DO EET.

ITT: too many britfeels, nothing productive. make something of your life you can be proud of.

>>34889625
>personal statement
What's this?

Why do I need to write a manifesto to mop floors?

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>>34889482
>fat fuck

Maybe, would still put you on your arse though you gassed fanny.

bulldog breed > effeminate lanky cuck

>>34889606
it's okay. tell them you "just need a little time"

>>34889636
>muh feels

This isn't reddit you wallowing piece of shit.

>>34889606

> So anon, tell us about a time you experienced difficulty in life and how did you respond to it?

You're gonna have a great time in the interview.

>>34889636
>like your ancestors were
I'm pretty sure my ancestors were emaciated serfs.

>Last Jobs Coach was a massive cunt
>New Jobs Coach is thick as a brick

Things are looking up I suppose

>>34889640
>would still put you on your arse
I already am.

With laughter.

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>been to the toilet more than any other day in my life
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RJRR3Ltm_sw
Post waifus.

>>34889655
who's wallowing? GROW THE FUCK UP.
This isn't babbys first thread. This is supposed to be something meaningful. If not, britfeel will no longer continue.
Also, ad hominem makes you look like a dork. And it's unwitty. Just say what you want to say, I'm not judging you bro
p.s. I'm assuming ur all dudes, cus only guys could make this much of a nothing-shit-fuck-up out of something

thinking about writing some edgy some stuff for my essay but worried that the person who makes it will think i am a nazi and purposefully fail me

>>34889665
I should become a Job Coach and just give robots mad bennies.

What do I put in the skills section of my CV?

>>34889698
Proficiency in languages, coding, professional software, machinery, vehicles, tools etc.

>>34889673
enjoy it chap, still doesn't change anything.

I'm going to assume you're middle class coddled trust fund babby with hands like those?

>>34889606
What does your current day to day routine look like? They probably can't sympathize with you because they've been through your specific type of problems. To them depression is something caused by the external, so they're trying to give you the same steps they themselves would follow. If its caused by something internal though, the source of the problems are a lot harder to figure out and overcome. It sounds like they're looking out for you though, maybe just talk with them and explain you appreciate them trying to help but you aren't in the right state of mind at the moment.

Overall though, if you're a NEET at the moment, doing anything will probably help you deal with your issues better. I know that I was more confident, happy etc, when i had a job. Now that i'm not doing anything i'm depressed as hell. One thing that has helped is going the gym everyday, the exercise meme as it turns out, is actually real. It provides a kind of snowball effect in mood and productivity. It teaches discipline without thought, since its such a simple process. Would recommend.

I'm probably just talking shit though, projecting, have nothing to go off and am basically just discussing my own personal issues but pretending i'm discussing yours. Good luck

>>34889698
Professional self pleasurer

Accidentaly just quoted using
>
in a normie chat. I don't think they noticed though.

>>34889724
You're... you're a fucking idiot.
It's a standard in quotation online, every email uses it.

>>34889728
Not in 2017 they don't.

>>34889698
What kind of jobs do you want to apply for?
What can you do?
What have you done in the past? (not professional, can be for fun or whatever)
What are your hobbies/interests?
What are you like as a person, what do you prefer to do, and what do you not like?

>>34889714
I'm a different guy.

I'm just LMAOing @ ur life. Your fists are literally spherical, the only digs you're giving are into all the pies.

>>34889728
I've never seen anyone use it outside of here and occasionally reddit. And if they do it gets formatted. It just came out as > in this.

Also "this is how most people quote now"

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alright guys, here's a first draft for me cv

let me know what you think

>>34889732
it is, even plebbit uses > to add a quote box to a sentence.

>>34889747
>sarcasm quotes

errrr

>>34889747
*looks in your direction without moving her head*
sheesh... awks...

>>34889748
Half of your page literally doesn't matter to the shitty part-time jobs you're applying to.

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>>34889687

This finger-in-mouth kind of picture gives me funny feelings in my pee-pee

>>34889748
>that politics section

If you actually want a job you should get rid of that or at least cut it down. You're just giving people a reason to dislike you which you shouldn't do. Most people who interview you aren't gonna be reading /pol/

>>34889748
It's fucking shit. You need to lose about 1/3 of the words. Also, you don't need help, judging by your qualifications, you're just lazy as fuck, you toad.
Learn how to make phrases instead of full sentences. Also your writing style is lackluster and unimpressive. Could be worse tho. I would hire you based on your skills alone, leave alone the shitty CV lol

>>34889741
Those aren't skills. I already did that part.

I just some ideas for generic shit to pad out my CV.

can i have a plant as a waifu?

also, you're a piece of trash. UKIP, really?
c'mon guy. no wonder you're inarticulate.
LRN2CULTURE WHITEY

>>34889825
a-are you lost?

>>34889823
Depends what type of plant. If it's a plant girl sure. If it's an actual plant then no.

>>34889748

This has got to be a fucking troll

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>>34889815
you twit, that's what I'm trying to do. Post the answers and I'll show you how to do it for fucking nothing. Geez.

>>34889748
Take off gaming as an interest. you also have a year+ gap of doing nothing from 2015 when you ended uni.

That's the first thing they'll notice.

put some lie like 2015-ongoing; online tradesman, involving writing custom listings for products, handling customer queries and shipping out the items.

all that is a fancy way of saying you sold some shit on ebay

>>34889823
sure if it's something like Lillymon

>>34889779
I want to stick my black cock in her mouth

>>34889847
>We'd just like to review your feedback, write your username here please

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>tfw no will to do anything

>>34889832
I thought, "Hey, I wonder how those guys in Britfeel are doing, I bet they're sad cus they don't have any revolution, better take some radicalism to them OH WAIT THEY'RE ALL A BUNCH OF FUCKING LOSERS NOTHING TO SEE HERE BYE"

>>34889748
>Only one job, being a paperboy like 10 years ago
>Gaming as an interest
And worst of all
>that politics section

You better realize that even though the education section is pretty tight that's going straight into the trash.

>>34889874
cya later then

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i've only got 40 quid to last me the rest of the month and all i wanna do is buy shit rrreeeeeeeEE

Do any of you lads have experience getting nudes off interpals qts?

I'm speaking to a few, especially one from Taiwan. We like chatting but idk how the fuck I can progress to a more romantic phase

>>34889748
remove any mention of exactly which way you lean politically but keep the parts about you gwtting off your arse and doing stuff.

imagine if your boss is gonna be a paki or a libtard and sees you support fucking UKIP

>>34889890
not likely i only apply to civil service these days

>>34889881
No you twit, you just won't see me, and you'll be stuck here doing the same stupid shit you've always done.

>>34889869
>sure thing
>write in someone elses account name

Not fucking hard lad.

>>34889874
I mean I know it's probably bait but if it's not calm down mate. I'm far left but you gotta understand that this is largely a far right site. If you want to try and get a point across thats not how you're gonna do it.

>>34889907
*attacks you viciously from behind biting at your ear*
REEEEEEEEEEE

>>34889888
be forward.
"You look sexy... can I see your XYZ?"
"You have a great figure. Do you dancing" etc.
"You have such a beautiful XYZ, can I see more"

>>34889859
Post pics pls
bbcbloc

>>34889922
>Indian pick up lines

>>34889921
Ow. Thats not very nice is it.

>>34889922
>you have a great figure do you dancing?

this is why you never ask britfeel for advice

>>34889922
de ye like dancin, come here luvy, ave a chip

>>34889922
Sounds like something Rasheed writes on pornhub vids

>>34889922
We're more friendly than that honestly, it sounds a bit creepy when most of the time we just talk about our respective days

She sent some really cute face pics, I said she looked cute and she said I looked nice back, but that's the extent of it. She's a fucking virgin and everything, I just don't want to creep her out

>>34889907
fair enough m8, I'm not trying to rile anyone, genuinely came here to help you lot out, and all I get is "post pics" and contradictions.
I don't need that shit. I just want to make you lot NOT PATHETIC. Is it impossible? I am trying, but this is only like my *counts* 10th or so time in britfeel. I must say, I was not impressed, and am still not. Still, I would like to see you guys succeed in life, so I keep coming back (for some reason)

Do any of you lads get an intense burning/stinging senstation all over your upper body when you get slightly hot or move too much/too quickly?

It's fucking up my life, I can't lift or run any more. I can't even fucking walk fast without sperging out due to the pain.

I can't get motivated lads. My plans to join the army were obliterated and now I'm fucked. The only work experience I have is being a teaching assistant in a primary school for a week (which was hell on earth) and a residential I did for the army, where I went out into the hills for a week and did uncomfortable army stuff.

No-one wants to hire a twat with this experience. All I can do is apply for jobs online and sit around the house waiting to hear that I've been rejected again.

>>34889922
You've never seen a girls Tinder inbox have you?
they LITERALLY (as in literally, not figuratively) have hundreds of matches saying that shit to them.

>>34889978
It means you're getting close. You need to try and hold that pain when you get it, for at least a good minute. Then when the time is right and the pain is almost unbearable release it. Then you will turn super saiyan.

>>34889978
Yeah, that doesn't sound right. Go see a doctor mate.

>>34889978
See the fucking doctor mate.

>>34889925
Lol, I'm Punjabi (Indian to you), London born and raised.
Prolly get more play than you, cunt.
>>34889936
FFS all girls do dancing, even the fat ugly ones, BECAUSE THEY LOVE SHOWING OFF.
You probably never get laid. You really DON'T know how to please a woman. Damn.
>>34889942
Hey fuck you, if she has a nice body, nearly 100% she does something sexy with it.
Also, fuck you.
NOTE HOW IT IS AN EXAMPLE. IF YOU WRITE SHOW ME YOUR XYZ THAT WON'T WORK YOU TWAT. YOU MUST USE YOUR OWN WORDS. I'M NOT TRYING TO MAKE YOU UNDRESS, JUST GIVING IDEAS, YOU UNCREATIVE, NOT-GETTING-LAID FUCKS

>>34889985
>matches
>I can't even get one match

>>34890018
Getting a little defensive there Pajeet.

>>34890035
a-are you a girl?

pls be in glasgow

>>34890000
Digits of truth. I will no longer resist the urge to scream in pain.

>>34890009
>>34890012
Will do as soon as I'm not in an nocturnal phase. I was just wondering if any robots have experience the same thing.

Alright lads
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uUqcBwQjj4k

Get that weekend feeling on, it starts tonight.

>>34890018
>Punjabi
POO
IN
THE
LOO

You filthy boy.

>>34890018
ooooh, thats lovely luvy, keep twirling that sexy body. oooh thats right, come ere and get some gravy for your chip

>>34889985
It's about styling it out you moron.
If you're so fucking creative, you shouldn't need any advice.

>>34889978
Meditate on the pain lad. It'll make you stronger.

>>34889984
Cheer up mate. You're decent sort. You'll make it yet.

>>34889846
Okay.
>What kind of jobs do you want to apply for?
Part time ones that pay minimum wage. But I've scoped out a few that pay a little more than minimum wage. Most of them are just jockeying a till but there's a few about cooking and cleaning.

>What can you do
Use a computer, calmly deal with dickhead customers, clean floors, cook food, write essays.

>What have you done in the past? (not professional, can be for fun or whatever)
Up until last week I was working at a call centre.

>What are your hobbies/interests?
Reading depressing literature.
Writing poems and stories.
Studying history and philosophy.
Cooking
Trying to play music.
Learning German.

>What are you like as a person, what do you prefer to do, and what do you not like?
I'm a very quiet and sensitive person. I like to spend most of my time doing the above, as well as shitposting on 4chan and having the sesh. I don't like being around large groups of people, being at the centre of attention, or people commenting on my autism. That really hurts my feelings.

>>34890044
I hate to break it to you but its Wednesday.

>>34890044
it's wednesday you berk

>>34890044
But its Wednesday lad. Proper tune that though.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TF0ZIECM7_0

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>>34890067
>>34890069
Wagies need not apply, hahahahaha it's the WEEKEND FOR ME

>>34890061
>I was working at a call centre.
What variety?

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>>34889687
got up at 11.30 and did almost 5 hours of kinda good uni work. Pretty good day so far.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PVpusRc3xjk
>>34889978
i keep getting lightheaded and falling over when i get up quickly now hahah.

>>34890036
For sure. You guys massacred my people, not even 30 years ago.

>>34890049
Ur mum

>>34890050
yep, that's the way to be sexy alright. Just keep doing what you're doing and you'll be fine. Good road you're heading down, MATE.

>>34889984
get on those bennies mate. Learn a trade or try to think of a good business idea and apply to the princes trust for help getting it started in the meantime

>>34890061
>I was working at a call centre
Was it an upper class one though?

>>34889847
>Unironically using the words 'online tradesman' as a fancy way to to describe selling on ebay

Lol.

>Girl tells me ask her out (more or less)
>I don't

F-f-fucking roasties.... right lads?

Im going to kill me

>>34890104
he's got a year+ gap in his CV, he's got to bullshit it somehow.

what would you do then?

welp.
JC advisor wasn't in today
hope he's in tomorrow, I'm rapidly running out of petrol

this is fucking bollocks

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Life becomes so much less stressful when you realise the only thing you have to do is survive.

All that other stuff people pretend is required like a job, a wife, kids, holidays is all bullshit. There's nothing you have to do with your life other than survive, all that shit you're worried about doesn't matter. You don't need to do anything.

>>34890098
Your people shouldn't have been such degenerates.

>>34890086
no, its still wednesday.

>Junlad posts
>Get triggered that I'll never lick his butt while he shitposts

>>34890105
girls are gross and i hate them hahahahahahahahahahaha

>>34890061
HOLY FUCK BATMAN LOOK AT THAT
Write it down in a fancy way, shit you think will be impressive.
Do you want me to help you phrase it nicely?
I think first you should just write first, get feedback after. You seem alright tho.

>>34890088
Inbound calls for an electricity company.

Customers would ring in with problems and we'd sort them out. Or more likely put them on hold and pass the call on to someone else.

>>34890101
I don't understand this meme.

>>34890124
If you're absolutely dying for petrol get a bus. I know it's annoying sitting next to a bunch of old people and children, but it's better than wasting your last few dregs.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T1urq4Vb0XM
THREAD THEME

>>34890137
Thanks you seem kinda okay too.
*shuffles towards you discreetly*

>>34890134
stop this fucking disgusting shit

I just want to post my waifu without being lumped in with degenerates like junlad, is that so much to ask

>>34890124
Can't you get money for gas from them?

>>34890061

Literally a CC of every millennial currently unemployed within the UK right now. Good fucking luck even getting an interview.

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>>34890086
>sad twat dancing alone in a bedroom to his laptop on a wednesday night shouting unintelligible gibberish about wagies and the weekend.

>you will never go back to a time when homofaggotry didn't exist in /britfeel/

fbm

>>34890167
What's your waifu, lad?

>>34890122
Just say worked in a different local shop. Co op or whatever.
He can talk about it because he's done it before. Just changes the labels.

If it was me. I'd say supervisor role in store. Looks like you taken more responsibility in a shit job. Employers love it.
If I wasn't posting from my phone I'd post my cv. Which has fake experience and hobbies.

>>34890178
This. It's fucking ridiculous. Even more so when you get automatically rejected by a fucking robot after doing a questionnaire with the vaguest fucking questions and answers.

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>>34890105
CONGRATULATIONS

>>34890129
They were celebrating their holy procession in their own country and the British opened fire with military hardware (machine guns) without warning or reason.

>>34890178
Exactly the problem, my man.

That's why I need you guys to help me out.

>>34890192
what happens when they inevitably want a reference?

>>34890203
I fail to see the problem there friend.

>>34890155
I don't know how buses work
and it's too late to learn

>>34890219
You direct them to me. I've helped out several anons as a reference.

>>34890209
you do realise where you are right? we're all in the same boat if not worse off.

get down to the CAB

>>34890165
okay. Well you seem like a cool dude too.

>>34890185
Move forward, not backwards. We can't change the past, only the future. We can't control the result, only our effort. Just try your best and you'll be alright.

>>34890219
Give them your mate's number and tell him that in a few days he's going to get a call from your new boss so pretend you're also a boss.

>>34890209

Work on that poker face think up some good lies and let the bennies extremely slowly and painfully roll in until you eventually get something.

But seriously, I'd say I put more effort into keeping my jobs coach happy than I do looking for jobs because I know what's going t be more helpful in the long run

>>34890219
If they want a reference. Which I've only had checked once in seven jobs I have had.
Give family or friends or anybody who knows phone number and they can fake it.
Mate. I would give any robot a fake reference for a fiver.

>>34890219
>References

Please refer to 4chan.org/r9k/britfeel/. They will vouch that I am a friendly individual with a prime waifu.

>>34890239

>Alright mate, who's this?
>
>Yes, this is anonboss, anonchans former employer

Flawless

>>34890220
I'm going to pretend like you don't exist, because frankly, you are EXTREMELY annoying.

>>34890239
>neet anon picks up phone
>hiring manager of business answers
>"is this so and so of x business, i'm calling to inquire about anon"
>short silence, then a stuttering voice says "YES, I AM BOSS"

>>34890229
It's easy, you google which buses will get you where you need to go (usually the bus company will have a journey planner). If it's more than two buses to get there, get a day ticket. Where I live they're around 4 pound, or 1.60 for a single.

>>34890236
I was hoping with all the experience many lifetime NEETs here must have from deliberately bombing job applications they might have some insights.

>>34890264
I can vouch for you but I need to know who your waifu is first.

>>34890134
loads of nice guys out there lad, i'm sure you can pretend its me :^)
>>34890167
don't blame me for other peoples posts and desires, though I guess i do encourage degenerate posting.
>>34890203
top banter
>>34890185
homophobe baka

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n9GhMNESgAI

>>34890272
I love you too Pajeet.

>>34888607
fuck yeah, this is sick. fuckin straya. cheers m8

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Hey look you guys, I know you hate me, or don't care, or whatever, but if you post your problem in a concise way, maybe one of us (me) will try to help you. In any case, a problem shared is a problem halved, and just talking about it is therapeutic and helps you to concentrate on the issues, and being able to phrase it clearly really REALLY helps.
Anyhoo, just putting it out there for you lot :p

>>34890280
I have a lifetime experience of doing as little work as possible and scamming as many government institutions, individuals and business out of enough money and good for me to live comfortably.

I'm not the right person to be asking about doing shit in the normie way, and I doubt anyone else here is either.

>>34890315
I'm having trouble feeling any pleasure when I stick a finger up my bum, can you help?

>>34890292
o-okay. love you too whitey (I assume) scum

>>34890289
BRITFEELS - REVENGE OF PAJEET

was just about to make my tea but there's a voice downstairs I don't recognise

this sucks

>>34890315

I fucking hate my niece, wat do?

>>34890331
make sure to hit the prostate, simply rubbing your anal cavity like a mong isn't going to get you anywhere.

There's a few medical vids on youtube (trying to feel for prostate cancer) to show you proper technique.

>>34890331
no, you are beyond help. perhaps seriously defective. consider being destroyed.
what did you want exactly?

>>34890336
I sexually identify as Indian on account of my inability to use the toilet you cishet heteronormative scum.

>>34890337
Go out the front door and enter through the back to get to the kitchen

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>>34890347
joocy deets?
1. make peace with yourself
2. make peace with her
3. ????
4. profit

>>34890357
If you're offering, a lot of money. Then I could hire a professional to try and stimulate my anus.

>>34890331
Maybe you're just not as gay as you think you are?

>>34890347
How old is she? If she's between 8-13 then it's understandable since thats the shitty little kid phase.

Need a poo but its cold and raining outside

>>34890359
don't live your life by labels. just be the disgusting perverted degenerate you always were, but without judging yourself so harshly. It's beyond words.

The advice anon is in, tell your problems.

>>34890378
Northern Ireland?

I'll give it a root around for 50 quid and potentially travel expenses.

>>34890372

>Joocy deets

She's a baby
I hate babies for some unknown reason
I hate my sister because she's a cunt
That mixture is pure hate

>wat do

>>34890365
my window is an emergency exit
but I don't fancy decending the drain pipe

>>34890380
Impossible, if been called a faggot too many times for there not to be a glimmer of truth.

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>>34889748
>people seriously responding to this

How new

Here's my totally legit CV

>>34890398
I need to go for a poo but it's cold and raining outside.

>>34890378
want me to rim you? are you a sexy chick? might have to stick to finger stuff otherwise, or possibly a robot of some kind (an actual robot, not a chantard)
Why spend it on a professional each time, when you can spend it on a robotics set just once?

>>34890420
The worst thing about this is that it's written in third person.

>>34890404
Edinburgh, so unless you're willing to risk getting stabbed on your way through Glasgow.

>>34889748
p. sure this is the guy who works in the tesco bakery
now we know why

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Oi. Stop this bloody nonsense at once, you lot.

>>34890432
Because I'd feel to autistic ordering a sex toy to be delivered to my place. I feel like the postman would somehow know and judge me.

>>34890416
babies are cute?
give your sister a hug.
I'm not sure how you're getting all this, but if you have serious issues, you should talk it over with the involved parties.
Make a list of things you hate/love about her.
Think of mitigating factors and stuff like that.
If it is irreconcilable, just stay away.

>>34890444
If you're paying I'd chance it.

>>34890398
I feel trapped and isolated. I want to kill myself.

>>34890416
The baby is different to your sister. You have to understand this. Be nice to your niece and try to influence her as she grows up, maybe she won't be a cunt like your sister.

>>34890466
chop off your anus. problem solved.
Or, you know, just try not sticking shit up your ass.
Cover your ass or lose it, buddy.

>>34890489
I can't afford a "professional" locally but I can afford the services and travel expenses of an Irishman. Makes sense to me.

>>34890498
If you chop off your anus you just make a bigger, messier anus.

>>34890490
Where you at? What you do?
What do you want to do? How do you vent?
What escape mechanism? What focus?
Hobbies? Enjoyment? Hates?

>>34890512
Good point, this might help. Brb.

>>34889748
>gaming
>politics
delete this

>>34890512
if you try to keep it, you will lose it.
if you are content to lose it, you will find it.
lose it to attain it.

>>34890428
Get an indoor toilet, for the time being use a plastic bag, then double bag the first and tie it to make sure no smell escapes. Dispose later in bin when can be arsed.

>>34890490
Find someone close to help you, family or friends. If at a critical point, there's plenty of free-to-call suicide hotlines out there that will help. 18002738255

>>34890511
50 quid for an hour of bum plundering is a bargain, mate. And flights from Belfast to Edinburgh are pretty cheap.

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>>34889606
Tell them they're fucking retards. Parents who don't know how to handle their kids are the worst.

>tfw stuck in East Devon

>>34889636
Get the fuck out you filthy infiltrator. It's called bantz m8

>cousin who is younger than me has his own flat, a car and a job
>meanwhile I'm a NEET who lives with his dad and I can't even drive

ah yes very impressive

>>34890569
What is the job and did he get fucking spoiled by his parents?

What flavour is irn bru lads

Anyone else need some advice?

>>34890517
I'm from Scotland I honestly don't know what I want to do. I play guitar and I'm good with computers but when I think about doing one of those for the rest of my life it just depresses me further. Mostly I just take care of my disabled dad and I don't really have time for anything else.
>>34890533
I don't really have any friends. The only family I really have is my dad who's mentally disabled so I can't really dump anything on him.

>>34890582
Literally indescribable. It is incredibly unique and I feel bad for any country that doesn't have it.

>>34890582
Iron and brew

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>mfw just got told i'm the least favourite of mummys children

>>34890582
Scottish flavour.

>>34890582
Girders
>>34890588
Speak to your GP and he should refer you on to the help you need anon, use the hotline if you get any bad feelings before your appointment

>>34890588
Well, taking care of your dad, while no doubt soul crushing, is very a good thing. You're a good guy anon, I'm telling you now. If you tell any employer about this shit their opinion of you will fucking skyrocket.

>>34890582
>girders

>>34890580
well it started out as an IT apprenticeship and now he earns ~27 thousands per year, and he didn't even do a levels he just went straight into an apprenticeship after secondary

meanwhile I have a 2:2 degree in history and I can't get any job

>>34890569
I failed my driving test because I was "too quiet" wtf is that supposed to mean.

>>34890638
Silly Anon, you were meant to call the bastard who cut you off a cunt!

>>34890584
I know a girl who is legit schizophrenic and in a relationship with a guy she claims to be in love with. She also wants me and her to go to Amsterdam together for a drug taking weekend. Should I try to fuck he or what?

>>34890623
how many sources should i use for a 2000 word essay?

>>34890633
>history
I feel for you man, you job choice is limited as fuck.

>>34890665
absolutely, but know that you are sticking your dick in crazy. i give this my blessing

>>34890584
every woman I've ever talked to has ghosted me. what am i doing wrong?

>>34890665
No. Don't be a twat.

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>>34890613
>mfw just got told i'm the least favourite of mummys children
Please be true

>>34890665
p.s. try the truffles. seriously.

>>34890698
>>34890685
Well now I dont know who to believe.

>>34890309
Redgum and Men at Work are the best bands to come out of the land of plenty. Proper top bands.

>>34890665
Have fun with her schizophrenia. Say things to her and pretend you didn't, make strange noises and deny it, change plans at the last second and act like it was that way all along.

>>34890665
Yeah boiiii

oregano

>>34890712
Do you really want to destroy the other guy and cuck him? If so, try and fuck her. But if you want to be a cool guy, go on the trip and tell him if she tries to fuck you.

>>34890728
Sounds like a fun way to get stabbed.

>>34890712
Really depends. Are you certain she only claims to love him. Don't want to spend the whole time in Amsterdam expecting to have sex but be cucked the whole time.

>>34890623
I probably will use the hotline if I feel the need to vent. Thank you for the advice.
>>34890624
Thanks man, it's just hard as fuck coping with it all the time.

>>34890740
>and tell him if she tries to fuck you.
Don't do that.

Whatever you do, don't do that. Trying to do people favour's in that way never works out. If she tries to fuck you, and you decide not to just ignore it forever.

>>34890638
Polite way of saying not assertive enough.

They're worried you're to passive when driving and will cause a hazard to others and jams

>>34890665
Go if you want to, it's not your responsibility if she wants to fuck you - she's her own person, just don't push the issue - make sure it's what she wants.

Just keep in mind the potential consequences and ask yourself is it worth it.

>>34890674
Depends on context, if a certain assertion or key bit of info is the crux of your essay make sure it's sourced.

>>34890689
going forward, document each encounter as soon as after they happen so you can pinpoint exactly where it goes wrong.

I wonder how many anons in this thread have an hero'd over the years

>>34890740
I dont know the guy, I dont owe him shit.
>>34890747
Yeah this is my main concern. I dont care about getting rejected, but ruining a special friend holiday because of muh dick would be pretty shitty for everyone involved.

>>34890776
I've done it at least twice.

File: 1482258738070.jpg (129KB, 768x768px) Image search: [Google]

129KB, 768x768px

>>34890774
>document each encounter as soon as after they happen so you can pinpoint exactly where it goes wrong.