NEET and robot /recovery/ thread

I try to leave the house at least twice a week. Otherwise I will at least sit near the window or on the balcony. Just getting that little bit of sunlight is progress for me, sad as it is its better than I was a few months ago.

Tomorrow I'm going to go out and eat something on my own and then walk around town a bit or go to the library.

>>34888221
Even opening the window is refreshing from being a shutin NEET all day. good luck anon.

>>34888181
I leave the house when I need to (doctor appointment, buy medication, soap, toothpaste or stuff like that). I also go to the shopping mall from time to time to not fall into social isolation.

>>34888181
I leave for necessities, groceries and liquor. I also step outside if I need to have a smoke.

watching eggman's motivation streaming fucking 12 hours a day is making me want to start a youtube channel.

i could make shitty counter strike gaming videos and vlogs and shit that nobody would care about or watch but it would at least feel like i'm being productive right?

>>34889297
Don't do that anon. You'll look back on it in a few years and feel so cringy about yourself

Ontop of that there's a chance that someone has saved your videos so you could never get rid of them
>>34888181
I personaly leave the house whenever it's needed. I also go out of boredom. I'll usually go hang out in Wal-mart for a few minutes then buy something small like egg whites or bread before heading home. I like to drive because it's quiet and relaxing

Mfw just triggered my wagecuck narc alcoholic mom with some YLYL material from /wsg/, she literally jumped out of the seat and acted all pissed off KEK

Fucking boomers have no fucking sense of humor at all

>>34889351
>I also go out of boredom. I'll usually go hang out in Wal-mart for a few minutes then buy something small like egg whites or bread before heading home.

Same. I do that to have a small social interaction with the cashier

Two days ago I socialized with someone outside of my family for the first time in 7 years. I became manic afterwards and I was kept up all night obsessing about all the social mistakes I made, but it felt right. I was full of energy, my brain felt clearer than it has in years and I experienced a bunch of emotions that I don't think I've ever felt before. I'd definitely do it again

>>34889439
I experienced this recently. It felt so good and then the next day I cried so hard all day I gave myself a migraine, because such a small experience for other people is something so rare and difficult for me.

I've started writing down things to say and talk about

>>34889637
How long do you go between interactions, anon?

>>34889719
A few years

>>34888181
Why rejoin society? Realistically, all that would happen is that I'd be just as depressed, but also have to deal with the pressure and drudgery of having a job and paying for myself

>>34889863
You acquire the skills necessary to make yourself employable so that you don't have to live in constant of what will happen once you lose your neetbux

>>34889940
Oh luckily I'm supported by parents. I don't feel good about it, but they don't want me to kill myself and I can't support myself so this is the best I can do

I've been working out a lot for the past few weeks, can do 50+ pushups in a row. I also have some 25lb dumbbels that I lift, hoping to get a job as a stocker in some store.

I got an app on my phone where I time every minute of my life whether it's showering, eatings, sleepings, w/e. Using it to be more productive with my time

>How many times do you leave the house per week? Is it not driving you apeshit?

3-4 times a week, usually to get groceries or food

>>34889959
Then you're one of the lucky ones who can neet it up at your parents house until your parents die and then inherit their stuff

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been neet 7 years actually 8 in march. given up near entirely on trying to improve, I've tried countless times and it always ends up in failure. I have nothing left to give.

>>34890142
have any stories to share? you must do

I leave the house every day. I need to buy food and get fresh air or I'll go crazier than I already am.

I have hope one day I'll recover and join society. But I have failed many times also. It is a hard existence.

OP I meet plenty of people and can make friends. But I always have to hide parts of myself eg 24 year old virgin. It never lasts and I eventually lose track of all the lies I told which makes me anxious I will say something that will blow my cover.

>>34890346
fucking disgusting incel normie

WHAT HAPPENED TO VULPES

>>34890287
of my failures? plenty. hell the most recent one was the past weekend, it was sort of a last ditch effort too as I really really went out of my way for it.
but it's almost 6am and I am lying in bed mostly drunk phone posting. I'd need a keyboard sorry.

>>34890356

My autism is not so severe so I can pretend to function and talk to normies, but never be one.

But I can never be a robot. You people do not know true loneliness.

>>34890389
What's stopping you from making progress? Where does your ability to fake it come short?

Well I'm being forced to work 4hours 3days a week to keep my full welfare but I think after the 3month period is over I will be back to neeting.

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Hahaha kill yourselves you beta cucks. Its so nice being able to go outside and have a job and most of all, talk to qt3.14 girls

>>34890755

If you fake it people know on an instinctive level. You know when you're hanging out with normies and they bond over the dumbest fucking things?

That is them being them, they are not being intellectual or trying to fake it. That is legitimately the things they do. No man can fake that. Mostly sexual subjects distance me from other men which is a struggle as I hate having to lie constantly to fit in but telling the truth is unthinkable at the same time.

On the women front I make little progress or when I make progress because girls often legitimately like me I have crippling anxiety and ED.

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>>34890810
>GM fangirls are THIS delusional
Truly a sad thing to see

>>34890810
>mfw falling for the bait
if you had a job and game, you wouldn't be on /r9k/, cuck

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>>34888181
This many times: once a day, sometimes more. It's not driving me apeshit.

>>34890857
I just come in here to sniff the fumes of robotic exhaust while I masturbate to pictures of Ferra Fawcett dress up as the grinch

>>34888181
I have given up drinking stupid amounts every day, eating loads of junk food, and have actually started going to the gym on a daily basis while controlling my diet. I realised that I hate being a fat peice of shit with no life so am trying to better myself.

Still haven't gotten round to properly hunting for jobs, that still scares me

>>34890832
but engine temperature and coolant temperature are two different things?

>>34890356
that's asparagus for you, anon.

>>34889767
How did it end up like this? Don't you go crazy?

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>apply to fast food gig
>get interview
>"what makes you panda material?"
>"where do you see yourself at panda?"
>tfw wasn't panda material
>apply to winco for a night stock position
>tfw get email
>I'm not WINCO certified but thank you for applying
>Wut teh fuck?
>turns out someone else got that job through nepotism
>applied to Safeway for bread and produce clerk
>get email that I'm not qualified to put lettuce on the shelf
>26 years old
>my old HS freind I used to play Gears of war with is a probation officer making 70k per year
>the other one is a lawyer who graduated from a top 10 law school, we grew up together but the years split us apart
>tfw I didn't even party or kiss a woman or do something crazy with friends
>Just in a coma state in and out of Community college since 09
>tfw rheumatoid arthritis and it gets harder to walk every year

>>34891659
I don't really go that crazy for as long as I take my anti psychotics but my social skills have deteriorated to the point where it's impossible for me to answer simple questions or hold a simple conversation. Another thing that people might notice about me is that I no longer use any facial expressions or body language at all. It's like I'm an alien. I speak in a weird monotone voice and I have difficulties projecting my voice. When they stand close I talk to loudly and when they stand far away I talk too silently

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>>34891892
That's sort of starting to happen to me too, anon... trying to recover before it's too late

Finally left the house yesterday after one week. I usually go on walks around town but haven't felt like it for a while, so I forced myself to go outside.
I hate being a NEET. Fuck this fuck this fuck this.

>>34892177
I went out for a long walk after a week of being in my room. Feels so refreshing. I want to quit the NEET life at the next opportunity I have.

I still can't look at myself in the mirror, let alone go outside and be seen by others.

how do you even find out what you want to do for a living?

was gonna go into cyber security (tons of apprenticeships/gov't funding rn), but i dont want my whole life to revolve around computers, and im not even that good at programming... desu i dont know how much actual programming is involved, all these apprenticeships forms are very vague as to what you're actually going to do, moreso just 'like technology? sign up now!'

i dont know what i want, but i want to do something. I'm honestly up to consider anything. is there like a chart/graph that lists potential career paths, and i can start off by ticking off the ones that i know i wouldnt want to do?

>>34893050
Same situation, anon... every moment I spend away from the screen is a blessing

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I'm beginning with something small: I want to fix/change my handwriting and come up with a signature but I'm still looking for a font that is both (somewhat) fancy and actually usable in daily life (so no calligraphy stuff).

Pic related is how I was taught to write, it looks childish IMO.

>>34893428
Isn't that how everybody is taught to write? Then it changes as time goes by

>>34893455

>Isn't that how everybody is taught to write?
Americans don't learn/bother to use cursive from what I've read on 4chan.

>Then it changes as time goes by
Mine only became smaller and uglier.

>>34893050
the thing is i dont even want anything, i just want the bare minimum so I can get a peace of mind. A private apartment or even a trailer would suffice, then I would spend the rest of my life reading and post on r9k

instead i have to live with me crazy ass parents well into my thirties and be thrown into their life problems. I also have to deal idiots in my neighborhood who are hellbent making my life difficult.

>>34893428
>18
>tfw realised I still haven't come up with a signature
thanks for the wake up call anon

>>34893519
not him but I'm a britcuck and after primary school, no one ever remembered how to do cursive

>>34893677

Get to it right now anon. I'm 25 and I just write my name normally as a signature.

It's not like it's illegal or anything but it looks retarded.

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I want to be employed by the end of the year but I don't see much hope. My parents are expecting me to get a job in my degree but that's pretty much impossible now since I have no experience or references and I graduated 2 years ago. My mom is a little more accepting of me working somewhere else "for now" but I'll still feel like a failure knowing I blew all their money and yet probably can't even get a job at the grocery store at this point.

>>34893849
What's stopping you from getting a job at a grocery store or an ethnic place?

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>>34888181

I'm kind've scared robros. I realized I want more value and direction with my life beyond being this older NEET, and I did a lot of critical and reflective thinking on what I should be doing. I came to terms with as well that my family permits my failures and shortcomings, and that in turn needs to be fixed by going out on my own.

I'm currently looking for part time employment in a comfy and quiet small town I completed high school at, and made good habits living at. I enrolled to continue college in the summer at a CC nearby there, and am looking for places to rent out with room-mates so I can afford and develop my independence and minimize my expenses to get by. My family also refuses to help me get started with any of this so its a pure self voyage . . .

This is a bigger leap than I'd want to take in at once, but at the same token I'll be stuck if I don't do something now.

On a more happier tone, I've been walking three miles every night now for the past three weeks through ice and rain. I'm trying to reclaim my health and get /fit/, so I'm starting out by dropping weight first. I don't eat junk food anymore, and I no longer drink my calories. Lost 10 pounds so far. Eating healthier is harder than expected in this environment so I'm restoring to eating less in general. On top of that I've been trying to learn to draw again, been drawing every night for the past four days now. Pic related.

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Bumping because this is the only productive thread in r9k history

>>34893653
Are you living off neetbux or your parents?

I'm hoping I can make some money online via content creation. I never asked for the NEET life, and there is nothing I enjoy about it.

>>34890825
My entire life is a huge lie and no one has even gotten close to finding out about it, you just gotta get good at it.

>>34896270
Parents, and they're broke as well. I doubt I can get neetbux, they're going to be asking questions and making things difficult as usual I'd rather not go through that. They only give out measly amounts as well, just isn't worth it.

>>34888181
I make a point to leave home daily even if I've no important business to attent, in fact I do split my plans to avoid having an excuse to stay in bed.

I tried doing it the normie way. I've enrolled in college two times and dropped out both times. I tried working a wagecuck job - these are hard to get where I live and a lot of employers turn out to be scammers, I don't want this shit anymore.

I plan to use my meager savings to fund my business plans. They are in a rather grey areas but fuck it, I'd rather be a crook than a NEET.

This weekend I'm going to meetup for members of autistic political board (not /pol/) I'm active on. I'm terrified, this will be the first time in years when I'm gonna socialize with strangers.

I gave up on a relationship. Let's face it - maybe I can get rich, maybe I can blend in with the normies, but no woman would ever want me.

It all probably won't amount to shit, it isn't the first time I've tried.

>>34896615
just cry about your autism on the application form. works for most of r9k.

have a couple friends but they're failures to two of them have had the shit kicked out of them in my area so I don't go out as often anymore
(desu everyone we met hated us anyway so it's not much of a loss)

>>34888181
bump because you fucks all need this

>>34896615
something is more than nothing, right? bipolar, autism, depression, you have literally the world of excuses

>>34888221
>go to the library.

Cyborg here. This is honestly the best thing you robots can do. It's the most useful way of slowly assimilating back into normal society, feeling good about yourself and self-improving.

They usually have newspapers you can read so you can find out about current affairs, there are interesting history books, you'll be surrounded by other people who you don't have to necessarily talk to (and are usually discouraged from doing so).

>>34889439
It's because it's a challenge, and you haven't had a real challenge in years. Do you honestly think normies don't feel like talking to people is somewhat difficult? Working out what is socially acceptable to say, what the other person is thinking and how to compose yourself without looking like a fool doesn't come naturally to most people, despite what people on here think. It is stimulating though, which is half the reason people do it. It's half of the reason loneliness and isolation further cripple someone and trap them in a way that means they're then unable to 'get' what basic conversation is supposed to be like, then they get terrified of having to experience it.

I'm glad you went out of your comfort zone and felt good about it. It's half the reason why a lot of people bother to get up in the morning and go outside.

>>34888181
>Discuss recovery plans
none
>Question of the day:
none
>Is it not driving you apeshit?
somewhat

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>>34891794
>what makes you panda material

I hope they don't ask that

>>34899340
This is what they do to weed out the cyborgs and robots. These bullshit quizes they make you do which you apparrently "can't answer incorrectly" always fuck me over.

>>34899371
It's because they expect you to have thoroughly researched them and have rehearsed an answer.

>>34891794
thats the thing
people like to pretend real life starts after highschool
but if you didnt make it in middleschool you start highschool with a minor disadvantage
and if you didnt make it in highschool you start college with a major disadvantage
and if you dont make it in college (wich you probably wont) you may aswell kill yourself
life is all about how people label you, once you get labeled something bad thats it

>>34899559
But how do you define making it? genuinely curious

>>34899808
making friends and being seen in a positive light
i already said it, its all about labels. It doesnt even matter if you are smart or handsome or very sociable (it helps a lot tho) if people see you as being that then you are set
because people know people and those people know people who know people
and if you know nobody or are known as a fuck up then you dun goofed

>>34899879
>and if you know nobody or are known as a fuck up then you dun goofed
I'm from a shit hole working class town and I can't name more than 5 people from school who have't fucked up their life. meanwhile, I can name 20 who now reduced their lives to being degenerates, living off benefits, accidentally becoming a father, having no job, being depressed and drinking themselves to death, and so on.

actually a quality post, seeing it made me put things into perspective here. for the most part, no one thinks particularly highly or lowly of me. I guess I still have uni to make it.

>>34888181
>How many times do you leave the house per week? Is it not driving you apeshit?
I usually only leave the house about once a month to get my NEETbux. It doesn't bother me since I've been mostly NEET for 14 years now.

That is changing in the next couple weeks though as I'm being forced to work 2 days a week for 6 months to get my NEETbux.
Having to work isn't so bad, it's just the complete inability to talk to anyone. I did the same thing last year for 6 months and ended up being the outcast. Surprisingly people are friendlier than I imagined but will distance themselves once they realize I can't hold a conversation.
The biggest hurdle I found was that normies generally just share stories constantly, and that I couldn't give my own input because people who have been shut-ins for over a decade don't have any stories or experience to tell.

>>34900629
>The biggest hurdle I found was that normies generally just share stories constantly, and that I couldn't give my own input because people who have been shut-ins for over a decade don't have any stories or experience to tell.
I can totally relate here anon. Most conversations I have with normies usually ends in me running out of ways to add to the conversation and just asking about them instead.

>>34900995
>just asking about them instead.

But Anon this is key. People really love talking about themselves, and not because everyone is self-absorbed, but because even normies don't actually have much of a chance to vent about their shitty week or some issue they're having. People like being asked how things are going.

>>34888221
I'm considering doing voluntary work at a charity shop so that people stop complaining about me not working

Also for qotd I leave the house 3 times a week, all three are for college. I don't go out of the house for anything other than education and the bare necessities the simple bare necessities

I have a decent GPA (3.5) at a good enough CS program, I just need ONE internship before I graduate. If I can do that, I can graduate with at least an adequate job, one that pays enough for rent and bills and a reasonably comfy life. I've sat around for the last six months avoiding this and most are gone but if I can just find ANYTHING this summer I might be okay.

>>34900995
This is what I did to start with and it worked well at first but then people seemed to start getting annoyed that I would never share anything about myself and always divert the conversation back to them.
Often felt like I was interviewing them when they just wanted to hear a funny story

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How do you make friends in university?

Started this semester after taking the fall semester off?

>>34901573
>Often felt like I was interviewing them when they just wanted to hear a funny story
Couldn't have summed it up better than this. I don't even know if it's possible to say I spent all my week on the internet without sounding extremely autistic so I just don't go there. Everything just goes to shit when they ask what I do for fun.

>>34901636
I feel like with that meme you should just go the solo route

>>34901636
see >>34901771
you're simply too autistic, anon. sorry.

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>>34888181
I only go outside 4x a week and it's only for two reasons: gym and groceries. My backup plan consisted of killing myself or joining the military(and that's only if I failed at everything else). The latter is probably my only logical choice besides sudoku. 22 years old and I still haven't figured my shit out.

>>34901636
Join clubs

>>34901771
>>34901829
>Reddit mad about the 6 trillion

>>34901880
What's with /r9k/ being triggered about the Holocaust lately?

>>34901880
Not triggered by the meme, it's just that if he makes friends with someone at university with THAT sense of humor, it's only going to be bad (most of the time).

>>34901906
Reddit has been taking over /r9k/ for the past few months, along with /tv/ /pol/ and /k/
>>34901929
>THAT sense of humor, it's only going to be bad (most of the time).
>you might fuck up because of a post on a website filled with similar jokes
Proof reddit normalfags are invading

>>34901996
>normalfags
>he's in the recovery thread complaining about normies

>>34893519
I am an American and most people I knew in high school still knew cursive but I think it is being taught less and less now

>>34902032
>robot ask for advice
>Reddit normalfag response over an edgy joke

>>34888181
>Unemployed for 7 months since graduating university, basically live as a shut-in off my mom's kindness
>Just received an offer for my dream job
Felt like I was reaching the point of no return, thank fuck I don't have to live like this any longer.

>>34902486
good with with it all anon

>>34890825
are you taking anything for the ED, i took a cycle of steroids and my dick has never been the same like it still gets hard but nothing like before

>>34901906
get your >>>/pol/ levels of autism out of here

A hundred posts, anons!

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>no job expierience
>never worked
>dont attend college
>INTP
>khhv

what are my chances

>>34903488
well how old are you and how did you become a NEET?

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I'm not NEET anymore, but when I was NEET. I'd say I left the house once a month at best. I was pretty much secluded in my room. The NEET life lasted for 2 years like that.

Nowadays, I leave the house once a day. Just to go to work and come back home. The weekends are great since I can comfortably be home all day.
It doesn't feel too bad. I like being alone, and I hate going outside anyway. The interactions with co-workers is probably the most stressful thing ever. So I'm usually exhausted once I get home.

I still have no friends, and definitely no gf (khv to be exact). But I did buy a car recently, got a better job, and I got /fit/ due to my job being so physically demanding. I'm improving my life in every way, but not socially.

>>34903711
You're self-sustaining, which is better than most people in this thread. Keep it up, anon.

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>even chris chan has a degree
>I don't

>>34903525
22, im lazy and almsot failed school

>>34903977
I'm 20 and I've been skipping since the first day of the semester.

This shit is a slippery slope and I might not make it. You never really just miss 1 or 2 lectures.

>>34896416
What sort of a life do you lead Roboto?

been working for a whole year now after 7 neet years
never stopped missing the halcyon days

>>34904296
I live the life of someone whom lies to get anywhere, I've lied my way into and out of every situation I've ever experienced. Humans are just like clockwork, if you push the right buttons, you can get anywhere.

i'm gonna make a tinder today. i'm almost a normie, i just need a little more practice talking to female strangers and i'll be able to get a gf

>>34900629
Hahahaha this is great, now neetcucks have to work for their scraps.

Ahahahahaha

I only leave the house to walk to my dog, and to get haircuts.

>>34905918

Im also working 4hours for 3 days a week to keep my full % of neetbux, they are trying to integrate us back in to society with these things but once the contract period is over ill be back in my house only leaving for groceries.

Who /doesn't want to grow up/ here?

I just want to remain as a bachelor in my apartment playing all the vidya I can.

>tfw first day at my job today

Feels so god damn good that I'm no longer a NEET anymore.

>>34906176

Kek you'll want to kill yourself within a month. Rememeber to do unpaid overtime to please mr, shekelstein maybe he will gibe you a raise; ^)

>>34891794
Do you live in Bellingham anon?

>got a data entry job after 5 years of neetdom
>employer super impressed by my 150wpm on an advanced typing test
>maintain 120-130wpm for hours on end
>SOME FUCKING ROASITE THAT TYPES AT <40WPM GETS PAID MORE THAN MEN

I did it r9k
I got a cute gf
And its a 15 yo loli
I really cannot believe it
It feels so different now
I no longer feel an intense hatred of chads and stacies
Its truly wonderful

>spend 2 weeks trying to control myself and fix my sleep schedule so I go to sleep at a normal time
>2 nights ago I finally got it set
>got a call from temp agency I havent paid attention to in nearly 6 months
>want me to work at some hsitty factory
>Its the night shift
>need money so I accept and start today
>just desperately trying to stay up all night so I can be rested for my first job in 2 years

>>34906730
Im just so happy I had to share it
Sorry if it doesnt fit the thread

>>34904446
Sound advice my friend.

Will be sure to make use of it in the future.

>>34906730
>>34906759
YOU MOTHERFUCKER

WE DO NOT HAVE A QT 15 YEAR OLD LOLI GF LIKE YOU
FUCKING CHAD PIECE OF SHIT

>>34906852
Shes even more insecure than me that's the only reason I got her
Some people mock me about her being flat and petite but I couldn't care less

>>34906749
Ok its 3am and I am already tired as fuck this is shit.

I have to work from 10pm to 6am, what time should I go to sleep for optimum rest

NEET here. Used to work but had a nervous breakdown due to depression, anxiety so I quit. That was about a year and half ago and I've done fuck all since then.

I started volunteering at a nearby op store last month.
Now I'm voluntarily leaving the house up to three times a week instead of only leaving when I have absolutely no other option.
I'm having to talk to people but because the shop is so small, I can handle it for the most part. I have very little responsibility there and only simple tasks that don't require lots of knowledge so it's not going to make me have a nervous breakdown like the last two jobs i gad

I've also started writing again which is the biggest thing I'm doing. I can actually finish small projects now without deleting them out of shame. I've done a fair few scripts, only two of which I'm not happy with and think need a complete rewrite.
There's a really amateur improv group that's starting next week in my area as well so I'll be forcing myself to go to that, despite wanting to shit myself.

I'm hoping that the past two months has been me genuinely beginning to move on from/deal with my depression in a healthy manner but I'm scared that it's just a seasonal reprieve and I'll go back to my normal baseline soon.
I can feel these black tendrils worming their way up my spine every now and again and I get another taste of what it was like before this current upswing. I really don't want to go back.

I managed to get a job after being NEET for two years. I startef 2 weeks ago and it's going good so far.

It also made me want to improve in other areas. I'm still adapting to this big lifestyle change so it's gonna take some time.
Thing I wanna do:

>get in shape
I gained a shitton of weight when I was a NEET thanks to constantly drinking alcohol, smoking weed and eating junk food.
I already cut back alcohol significantly, it was much easier than I expected, I was afraid of withdrawals and shit.
There is a gym near my workplace so I'm going to buy membership and work out every other day before work.
I have decent cooking skills so healthy diet shouldn't be a problem, I already cut out all soda, drinking just water and tea now. I also bought supplements like zinc, fish oil and vitamine D to become healthier.

>fix my face and teeth
I bought benzoyl peroxide cream and a an anntibacterial face soap and use them daily cause I have a ton of acne. I also made an appointment with a dermatologist so they can perscribe me some medication.
My teeth are yellowish probably because I smoke so much. I made a dentist appointment to ask ror advice and am looking into some whotening treatments

Cont.

>>34907177
Use the website sleepyti.me

File: ont.jpg (432KB, 1271x850px) Image search: [Google]

432KB, 1271x850px

>quit my job
>4 months later wonder what I'll tell potential interviewers I've been doing unemployed that long
>it's now been 3 years

>>34906028
Lmao why not get a real job man? Listen to yourself. You'd rather work for scraps and barely survive because you wanna hide in the house. The US will be cutting a lot of these programs, especially to people like you. These were meant for people down on their luck, something to help them get by. When they see your single with no wife or children and have been leeching for 5+ years you guys will be the first to go. Especially now that trump introduced his new tax plan to basically erase taxes for the lower bracket.

>>34907177
I cant hold on

How can I stay awake for 8 more hours when I am passing out just sitting here

>>34907700
Kek not in the US I can be cashing out 1k $ a month until I off myself.

No point working when you can live for free. I even have money for stupid unesessary crap like computers phones , videogames.