/self improvement general/

>>34867844
0 replies. How fitting.

>>34867884
>0 replies. How fitting.
posted it 4 minutes ago, give this thread some time.

>>34867844
why are pua sites considered scam?

Fake it till you make it, I found, is the best advice ever known to man.

Feelings and attitudes affect behavior, but behavior also affects feelings and attitudes.

You have to make it a bit of a habit to monitor your behavior so you don't fuck up though.

>>34867844
I watch Aaron Clarey on YouTube when looking for motivation. He's not an faggot and will give it to you straight.

>>34867980
>why are pua sites considered scam?
because they are, they make you pay for scam guides or seminaries that teach obvious things like "look her in the eyes, stand like a man..."
>>34867982
>Feelings and attitudes affect behavior, but behavior also affects feelings and attitudes.
that's exetremely true, i made a lot of improvements changing my behavior, we are just slaves to our habits, so we need to change them.
>>34867986
thank you anon, i'm gonna see it.

>>34868078
Are you one of these losers who actually paid for the guides?

>>34868156
no, obviously. but i was one of those losers that spent their time watching pua videos and being exetremely disappointed.

>>34867844
Best advice you'll ever get: start lifting for mental and physical health, get a good job, live your life and forget about sluts.

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What is everyone else doing to self-improve?

>started lifting
I've taken up going to the gym, and have made a habit out of it being a month in now. I've never lifted before so I started low weight. I'm about to finish my first cycle before I increase my weights. Since I've begun working out, my baseline mood has been a lot more jolly lately.

>I've become much better at rationalizing my emotions + ordering my thinking
Being able to not let myself get worked up over irrational and insecure feelings has been wonderful. Being more orderly in my thinking has been good in not allowing me to overthink things that cause me anxiety and detachment from life.

>Not as anxious anymore socially
Thanks to some lectures, some literature, and getting over the fear of embarrassment, my social anxiety has been curbed completely for the most part. It's been a while, but I'm actually feeling good for once.

Hope you're doing well /r9k/.

>>34867844
I'm trying to learn to draw to follow my dreams as a character concept artist but it doesn't seem like theres a basic structure/normal path to learning to draw? I tried looking up /ic/'s sticky but I feel retarded and unsure about it. I've looked up external tutorials too and they all seem to jump around.

It feels like the first thing I should be doing is learning how to make my mind see things in shapes? Is this accurate? I've been doing this in order to draw up basic things like utensils and stuff around the house and it seems to be helping. I practice drawing basic shapes a lot too, easily fill up pages of them. I've also taught myself to sketch rather than going off rigid hard lines like most people would, granted my sketches always come out nicer than the outlines.

I also enrolled to start doing art classes in the fall so I find my time limited to pick up up the fundamentals.

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>>34868428
I've started running and teaching myself Spanish. I'm doing pretty well at the moment and I've finally got a set of hobbies I can be proud of. Running really helps when I'm feeling sad as I wear myself out emotionally as well as physically, especially when I'm listening to music.
Still a khv with fucked social skills, but one step at a time right?

>>34868428
i wish you good in luck in the path of improving yourself, i don't lift but i also improved my control over my emotions and mi anxiety. It is really important to exit from your comfort zone for that, but what most people don't understand is that you have to make it an habit, nobody is going to defeat anxiety going out of his comfort zone just once or twice, you have to make you brain used to it.
>>34868544
i'm not good at drawing, so my tip could be utter shit, but i think that to get really good at drawing you have focalise on how to draw just one thing until you have reached a point where you have totally grasped it, for exemple the human body. Also you shoul probably perfect you observations skills and observ more details as you can. hope i've been useful.

>>34869270
just a tip on how to learn a language faster: use flashcards, you won't imagine how fucking useful is that.

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>>34867844
A couple of self improvement related things I have realized recently

1) You have to figure out how to be happy with yourself and who you are right now, before you self-improve. Somehow you have to learn to see yourself as perfect and fine with who you are right now and not as a defective person who needs to fix himself. Otherwise your progress will be slow and little if anything you achieve will truly make you happy. This is a hard redpill to swallow.

2) If you don't believe you deserve to get your goals you will never get them. How do you know if you are in that "I deserve it" mindset? If you can talk about what you want openly and shamelessly.

>>34869659
>1) You have to figure out how to be happy with yourself and who you are right now, before you self-improve. Somehow you have to learn to see yourself as perfect and fine with who you are right now and not as a defective person who needs to fix himself. Otherwise your progress will be slow and little if anything you achieve will truly make you happy. This is a hard redpill to swallow.
this is a personal philosphy problem, although i generally tend to agree with you, you have to be a little discontent with your life to being pushed to make it better. Within limits, there is nothing wrong about it.

>>34869732
I see it as: You have to see yourself as you are already perfect, you are already fine in every way and happy. You just want to have a different experience in life than you currently have: more money, women, travel, etc. Not to be better, not to make you feel good about yourself or fill a hole in you, but just to have fun and experience this world we are in.

>>34869779
i think that's just lying to yourself, but if it is useful to reach your goals, god bless it.

>>34867844
How could I stop being a creep with social anxiety?

I'm at the uni and literally didn't talk to anyone since the beginning of the year. I'm almost the only loner over there. I want so much to drop out.
It feels like I have no occasion to be out of my comfort zone at all but I'm in fucking uni and everyone is socially acceptable besides me.

>>34869779
I think this is kind of like: I have one skin, may as well be comfortable in it.

I like that you put it in terms of wanting a new experience, I never saw it that way.

I said I wanted to clean my room a little today but I have hoarding tendencies and I'm lazy on top of it. Help

>>34869981
you need to exit from you comfort zone, but you can't. You should take it step by step, if you have no social skill and you put yourself in difficult social situation you will make a fool out of yourself and end up being demoralized and closing yourself even more. I don't have good social skill, but for what i know you wont find friends at uni just aking them, try to have human contact for studying puroposes and try to transofrm it in a friendship and if you can do that well you will be introduced soon or late to the social circle of your friend. Ask people about what you're studying, try to enter in some whatsapp group of one of your classes and communicate daily with those people, but not about other topics than study in the beginning, so you wont appear weird and needy of friendshiop.

>>34870321
>I said I wanted to clean my room a little today but I have hoarding tendencies and I'm lazy on top of it. Help
organize your time, don't say " i want to clean my room today", say "at this time i want to clean my room".

>>34870471
Thanks. Basically, what you tell me is that I absolutely need to hide my needs to not be a creep?

Tutorial classes will start very soon for me, I may have occasions. If what you said is true, I will try my best to not put myself in a bad situation until that.

>>34870910
>Thanks. Basically, what you tell me is that I absolutely need to hide my needs to not be a creep?
yes, but not be too afraid to seem a creep, awkward situations are normal, they happen, what is bad is making them more awkward by fearing them.
>I will try my best to not put myself in a bad situation until that.
you have to put yourself in uncomfy situations, but not too much. Start with something simple, when you see that you can handle more increase the difficulty, see it as a game.
good luck anon

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>get more money so roasties can fall in love with your wallet and social status after being plowed countless times by Chad/Jamal FOR FREE

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>>34871693
>current year
>still falling for the 3D meme