>Anon this is police, we have a search warrant for your house

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>>34812343
I'm very overweight with a lot of ass-fat, so when I go toilet I find it hard to detect the hole in the toilet, so the shit sometimes misses the hole and ends up on the floor. I can't clean it up easily so I leave it for about two weeks before doing a clean.

That would be the most embarrassing thing they would find.

>>34812410
what the fuck

Can't you feel if your asshole isn't centered on the seat? I mean, you can feel the rim of the toilet touching your ass on the left and the right, so you know in the center of that is the hole.

My internet browser history is a lot of legal but weird porn like feet and traps

Also I guess they could find my semem covered bed

>>34812475
My toilet is one of those modern small ones, I find it very uncomfortable to sit on. To make things worse it's too close to the wall. I can feel normally, but it's very hard to position myself. I'm not saying all the shit goes on the floor, but a fair bit ends up running down the side of the bowl to form small shit puddles on the floor. I have special bathroom shoes I wear only in the toilet to stop it getting onto my feet and spreading around the rest of the house. I have the problem all under control though.

>>34812343
My anime collection and weeb drumset...

>>34812343
I have the family sized bottle of hand lotion next to my bed ...that's about it...am I boring?

>computer
well I'm fucked. I hope I get the death penalty instead of life.

I'm good as long as they don't consider 2d traps to be cp.

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>>34812691
This is now a dance thread

>>34812410
I wonder if girls like Kim Kardashian and Alexis Texas have this problem

>>34812343
most embarrassing thing about my house is filth, particularly dust and mold, and clutter. I live with my mother and she is a disgusting pig

My shitposts
Lots of SFW pony pictures
Torrented movies and anime
Ton of brony music, some torrented non-brony music
Games

>>34812509
>semem covered bed
post a pic, anon

Unless they managed to get everything from my private browsing history on my phone they ain't finding shit.

>>34812691
>"Anon, before we look into your files, do you want to tell us what we might find there? You are sweating."

What would you say?

>>34812343
they will find a few onaholes and fleshlights but thats it

>>34812810
I got nudes from your daughter, cuck

>>34812812
...and once again this advertisement brought to you by the people at onahole....

>>34812343
>he wouldn't kill himself before they were done

>hundreds of drawings of adam lanza

i wouldn't know how to explain that one

Nothing...I'm not embarrassed by anything I have/own.


Oh, yeah.

I truecrypt all my hentai and only go to the /r9k/ via tor

>>34812594
>have the problem under control
>literally spray shit all over the floor on regular basis with liquid/diarrhea spray-a-thons fueled by an overweight fat fucks diet of chips and soda

You're not in control at all you fat monster.

Kill yourself.

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in house
>a bondage toy called "the humbler", pic related. prevents a man from standing by pulling his balls downwards, also makes them super easy and fun targets

on computer
>10 year collection of ballbusting and castration porn

on phone
>not much, probably footage of myself receiving a bj from a fat chick

>>34812905
>4chan
>TOR
I thought they banned acces here through TOR.

>>34813122
They ban posting, not access

>>34812343
Hmm I should be ok I don't carry anything illegal in my home but then if they go through my folders in my compu-

>Pictures
>yugiohebay
>Wall
>Eliza

ohfuck.jpeg

>>34813145
What's the point of going to r9k through TOR without ability to post?

> you are not on TOR right now, you little shit