/britfeel/

>>34741573
Shipman free edition. You scouse bastards.

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>>34741573
>tfw you live NEET hours but exist as a wageslave

>>34741993
I'm sure he'll be back, the meme has staying power.

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what's for breakfast lads deudesu

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>>34742535
Porridge with golden syrup.

>>34741573
With false OP image edition
Where the fuck is Brady and graffiti man?

>>34742535
azulads boipucci

>>34744250
haha jun please

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>>34742535
tescos value shredded wheat

>>34742535
dust

selected all the cars

First time awake this early after a full nights sleep since December. The sleepers worked lads.

What's your objective today lads?

Mine's to begin the accounting for my company. Quite a dull day then but i refuse to pay an accountant 1000's for a fucking balance sheet.

>>34744786
i fucking loved spreadsheeting at my old job

off to town today, volunteering at a charity shop
>tfw manager lets you buy cool shit dirt cheap before it even goes out in the shop

>>34744786
Try to not think about how depressing it is that I'm gonna have to work for the next 50 years and ultimately achieve nothing. Oops

I'm going into work I suppose. Six hours sleep again. Every time I walk in I hope I'm hit by a car.

>>34744952
Mine transitions. First I hope the car I'm in crashes. Then I get hit by one. Now I'm in work so I would like if the building collapsed

>>34742535
can of cheap cider

>>34744934
I'm just doing lots of different college courses to avoid work for as long as possible.

>>34744786

To call British Gas

>>34745032
Don't have to go in after all. On the downside I obviously won't get paid (zero hours contract) and I'm short of sleep. On the other I can play Nioh all day.

>>34745295
Could be worse I guess. May aswell enjoy ir

>>34742535
Fuck all. I'm trying 18/6 intermittent fasting.

Probation group thing today. And nobody else has turned up yet. Strange

>>34745628
>Probation group
>group
nonce lad?

>>34744786
Got an interview today for a job that amounts to being a secretary arranging meetings. But because the people who attend the meetings are bigwigs it pays 35k a year and had a 2 page job advert.

Why can't they just come out and say the job is "arrange meetings, get the CEO's coffee right"?

>>34744952
Slept 10-1 then 6ish till 8:30
Wonder if I'll make it through the day

>>34745670
Good luck, gonna be tough up against any woman for the job

>>34744786
Get my shopping done and try not to go over a budget, easier said than done but when they advertise sales like chocolate digestives for 2 for 1 you can't help but get drawn in.

>>34744786
Practice Japanese and guitar, don't eat too much and maybe learn some music production stuff.

>>34745672
When I was hammering the booze (t-total now) I'd often not sleep a wink on Sunday night. Imagine a nine hour day in a fucking office with no sleep. It was fucking hell on Earth. Anyway if I can do that I'm sure you will manage on a cumulative five and half hours mate.

>>34745685
Do you think? Surely women want to do less stereotypical rolls nowadays?

Kettle Crisps. San Pellegrino. Waitrose finest biscuits.

Just some of the things you get to enjoy while working at a high class call centre.

>>34745771
Hahahahahaha oh anon.... no they just want to be paid more.
The only roles they're fighting for are cushy management roles in tech companies.

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>>34745808
>work at warehouse
>lunch is rustlers burger and 35p energy drinks
Living the dream...

>>34745808
Don't forget club sandwiches that make you feel like you're in an exclusive club.

>>34745808
>fish and chips or a beef and brie sandwich prepared by nigerians on minimum wage

ah yes

>>34745853
>rustlers burger

I'm sorry anon, no one should have to eat food with that kind of calories/enjoyment ratio.

>tfw finally truly disastisfied with my life
>sick of having no friends
>sick of being unable to discuss anything i like
>sick of being NEET and when i do get employed being given a short 3 month or less contract on menial minimum wage labour
>sick of having no education past GCSEs
>sick of not having a normie life and being able to enjoy things like pubs, clubs and other dumb normie things

i wish i wasnt autistic and socially retarded to boot or id go out and meet people but how the fuck do you even meet anyone

i think im leaving this to fate lads, i'm going to apply for an access course at college to finally get myself to uni, if i get in thats my life line

if im turned down then its probably time to end it, im too tired to keep going like this

>>34745890
I often had a Rustler's at the end of a night's binge drinking in order to soak up some of the alcohol to reduce the hangover. Would often feel markedly sicker for it though.

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Morning lads. How 'bout you post your waifus, gents.

The new Rainbow update finally updated. Played a few rounds throughout the night, and realized a few things; I'm terrifyingly afraid of IQ now, Mira is good but the players playing her are trash, and that I cannot recognize targets when I'm tired.

On another note, none waifu-posters, what do you think of waifu posting? A lot of people seem to hate it, but maybe it's just a vocal minority.

Running a severe calorie deficit per day (1000+), according to my Fitbit. I do wonder whether it will make a difference. It says I should be looking good in seven weeks. If that happens, I'll be very impressed. Of course I won't be buff yet but apparently I won't be a fat fuck anymore. It would make me a lot happier, I think.

>>34745900
How old are you?

I hope smug neets will learn a lesson from your post

>>34745826
Maybe, I'm not expecting much from this interview anyway, I panic under pressure. Feels kind of nice to not care if you get it to some extent, when I used t go to interview whwre I really wanted the job I'd be super nervous and crash hard afterwards when I didn't get it. This is just half a day off wok and some interview practise for the future.

>>34745931
>On another note, none waifu-posters, what do you think of waifu posting?

Generally indifferent towards it, but I think it's a bit silly.

>>34745890
The worst thing about them is how wet they are

Full day of excel advance course today lads.

Not too bad. It's Kinda chill

>>34745957
20, i'm not a smug NEET i do my best to stay employed but its really hard living rural with no transport links

>>34745946
Losing weight does indeed make you feel enormously happy.

>>34745981
Are you medically recognised as autistic?

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>>34745900
I feel the same, I can't even go out and attempt to meet people because lack of money and i'm not on bennies/JSA because they turned me down.

>>34745957
>I hope smug neets will learn a lesson from your post

Whatever. Go out into the world to work, interact and partake in various activities and see how quickly you get sick of it and go back NEETing it up. It's fucking bullshit out there. Enjoy your gibberish.

>>34745981
Move to a city anon

>>34746004
>turned down for JSA

How can that even happen?

>>34745991
The timeframe just sounds too good to be true. Two months is no time at all. Nevertheless, it is nice to focus on fitness. It's a good distraction from other worries, and it makes you feel as though you have a clear purpose and a well-defined timeframe. If it goes well I may even persevere in order to try and get my body fat percentage beyond normie tier to actually appealing territory.

>>34746024
Having loads of savings or being JF

>>34746010
I like it. I enjoy having money, friends, a girlfriend, something to do during the day, a purpose in life.

>>34746010
Good job > NEET > Wageslaving

>>34746032
JF?

>>34746003
Yes

>>34746004
I cant even travel to a job centre ;_;

>>34746017
Need money to do so and a car or something, I have neither and no employment is available here since theres really nothing that can employ unskilled people here

>>34746047
You should try to get on ESA and then use the money to learn to drive.

>>34746047
>Need money to do so and a car or something

Move to a city on bennies and housing.

If you're autistic you must have a relative who'd be willing to drive you to Manchester or whatever

>>34746071
Somehow there really is no one in my immediate family can drive, I really dont understand how its the case

>>34746071
Yeah or he could find someone who is going to drive down to Manny to say something to Nigii's face.

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im swamped in with work, lads.

>pinched my finger in the window handle
>internally bleeding
>really hurts

Why are we such fragile creatures?

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>>34746158
People who die from trapping their finger in things are evolutionary dead ends. Fragility weeds out the weak

>>34746158
>Why are we such fragile creatures?

we chose to use our brains rather than our physical strength to rule this planet.

>>34746183
>trying to outmuscle a tiger rather than outsmart it

youd last a long time lad

>>34746183
One visit to the ghetto or a warzone would make it abundantly clear that humans are dangerous, and I doubt anyone would be naive enough to think otherwise.

>>34746175
>Fragility weeds out the weak
Not anymore, we have mummys and the NHS to care for us.

>>34746183
Is that what guns and missiles are? Weaponized brain power?

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>>34746043
Where do I find a good job? What even would qualify as a good job?

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>>34741573

Can you think of any doctor in history with worse fashion sense than Shipman?

>>34746243
What's happening in this picture originally?

Got to go JOB CENTRE today.

I am scare.

I did read if they need you to go appointment they must pay you to get there. I don't know if it true.

>>34746217
i never said we are not dangerous but its our ability to make weapons and strategist that makes use dangerous. we are physically weak compared to a lot of other animals

>>34746242
>Is that what guns and missiles are? Weaponized brain power?

yes.

>>34746274
It is not true, unless they make you go to one further away than your assigned centre

>>34746284
Agreed. My comment was in reference to your picture.

>>34745853

Why not just bring some baguettes, anon?

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>>34745931
>developing a habit of kissing fig goodbye before going to work in the morning

I-it's ironic, I swear

>>34746284
Is that why brits are so passive against the government yet like having drunken fist fights among each other because the government has all the real power with their armed forces?

>>34746243
What defines a good job is up to you. Maybe something you enjoy doing, maybe something you don't enjoy but pays well enough to be worth your time.

I fucking hate everything, so I'm a NEET.

>>34746243
>Where do I find a good job?

You need to develop a skill that is in demand with employers. Then you need to work out how to show employers that you have that skill.

>What even would qualify as a good job?

Either a job that pays you enough to do the things you want to do, a job that is enjoyable in its own right, or, if you're really lucky, both.

>>34744786
go to the doctors and register with them and then make an appointment
then come home and reward myself with a wank.

>>34746386
What's the matter, lad?

0

>>34746017
how are you supposed to move to a city when you have less than 1000 in the bank and you're on benefits?

>>34746420
Bennies still get paid in the city, and housing bennies increase along with rents

>>34746438
>housing bennies increase along with rents

Not necessarily at all.

How does a 4chan pass work? How does it know it's me? Can I pay with bitcoin anonymously?

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>tfw missed out on blackcurrant tango

https://youtu.be/fGjizZCXetk

>>34746438
yeah but how do you get that? you get a train into the city then what.

>>34746480
It gives you a password with the pass. You type it in and it types that pas to your IP address until you log it out

You can pay with bitcoin, doubt it's anonymous

>>34746480
You login and browser sets a cookie. You can pay with Bitcoin but it doesn't grant you an anonymous privileges. If you get b& the pass is disabled and you are cucked out of your money.

>>34746523
Which is why you have 2 passes

>>34746495
Tango adverts have always been pretty good. I remember the slapping one got banned cos kids were slapping each other in playgrounds.

>>34745853
Why does anyone eat Rustlers?

They're always at least a quid and for like 1.50 you can get a fairly large portion of chips from any takeaway.

>>34746532
>double cucking yourself

Where should I go to lunch lads?

>>34746347
Yes, Government or more specificaly the laws it creates are backed up by a silent threat of violence.

>>34746574
Worth it desu. Shame my oldest one got banned so now I look like a newfag

>>34746337
Kiss me instead, i'm better

>>34746560
Fuck the politically correct state of advertising these days.

>>34746594
>these days

This was in like 2001, and some kid got tango slapped and went deaf or something so it was fairly justified

>>34746567
Mum buys them so I just eat them. I don't enjoy them much but they're the only hot food that is conveniently available. I always end up leaving the crust because they get so hard and chewy near the end.

>>34746567

rustlers is working class chavshit.

somehow manages to be worse than a savers burger from mcdonalds yet costs twice the price.

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>>34746567
Where I work is in the middle of nowhere and takes a long time to get there, the closest thing I have to a place to get food is a burger king which is always closed by the time I get there because nights.

>>34746567
Same reason people eat pot noodles

>>34746582
Mohammad's kebab with special sauce

>>34746594
I work in advertising and this is pretty annoying, you're right. I don't mind, for example, having a gay couple in an advert. The annoying part is people saying "Hey, we've got a gay couple in there!" as if they are being really creative and using it as an excuse not to have to come up with a good idea.

Those Tango adverts were written by an agency called Howell Henry. They were the top place in London at the time but have since gone out of business. The guy who wrote them is a black afro-carribean guy.

>>34746632
>Same reason people eat pot noodles

Something to say about Pot Noodles senpai? It had better not be anything other than "because they are fucking delicious" you jumped up little shit

>>34746672
I was watching the Halifax one and they just had to put a white man and pregnant white woman in there buying a mortgage.

I don't see any really epic ones anymore. I take it this ad is shown in advertising training.

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>>34746705
Lloyds TSB have a gay couple proposing as a centrepiece. It's pretty cringey

>>34746720
That's because only immigrants and faggots banks with Lloyds these days.

>tfw you saw a weebposter's cock four months ago but only just realised

>>34746705
Yeah there aren't many good ones getting made these days. The industry is obsessed with youth and almost anyone over 45 gets laid off. But it's not glamorous enough anymore to get the best of the best people in - they are all going to tech start-ups now. So the level of talent is dropping.
>>34746720
I know someone who worked at the agency who made that, and the boss (a guy called Damon Collins) would get huffy with people if he saw them having a fag, because he "hates smoking". When you've got that kind of cunt running the show, obviously the work is going to be insipid.

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>tfw put myself on grindr cause I want attention
>get shitloads of greetings, complements, sex/bj offers, unsolicited pics and accommodation offers

Lads should I just use this chance to get some nice free dinners every saturday and sunday?

I'm a real tightwad and the thought of having a free 60-80quid meal on those restaurants in the good parts of manchester seems awesome.

its not like I gotta put out or anything on the first(and last) date.

could also make them pay for my chinese takeaway/dominos pick ups for dick pics, that way they wouldn't know my address.

>>34746758
>I know someone who worked at the agency who made that, and the boss (a guy called Damon Collins) would get huffy with people if he saw them having a fag, because he "hates smoking". When you've got that kind of cunt running the show, obviously the work is going to be insipid.

huh, cool.

>>34746792
>its not like I gotta put out or anything on the first(and last) date.

Coz this works out so well for women on tinder

Enjoy getting raped

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>people are still paying for this corporation to exist

Don't worry about the staff discount

>>34746792

>1 week later
>lads I need advice, I let some grindr man poz up my neg hole for half a domino's, should I meet him again?

>>34746806

there are professional golddiggers on tinder who get a free 4-5 star dinner 3 times a week and prolly never even kissed a guy.

>>34746806
It doesn't work for women on Tinder?

>>34746807
It bothers me that taxpayer money funds those fuckers.

>>34746792
>tfw straight but only old guys on grindr want me

:(

>>34746831
>Straight
>On grindr

>>34746807
>trans girl 11
>>11

what has come of this world

>>34746826

http://thefinancialdiet.com/honest-qa-girl-goes-tinder-dates-free-dinners/

you don't let them drive you home or tell them where you live, and you don't date people who are clearly creepers(or pakis, you'd be surprised how many fucking pakis I see hitting on me, thought those cunts were 100% straight wife beaters)

you look for a white/oriental guy who looks like a beta provider.

>>34746807
The beeb normally don't bother me that much but that's some shitty journalism

>>34746827
They have boyfriends waiting to smash the guy if he tries anything

My fucking laptops falling apart lads.

3 and a half years with no major problems and now the keyboards starting to fuck up. Certain letters don't work unless I push really hard and the down arrow key is fucked. Oh well, I only paid 250 quid for it I guess it's served me well.

>>34746807
Don't get me fucking started on those cunts.

>living on my own so don't have a tv
>apply to tell them I do not need a tv license, don't wanna pay for something i don't even use
>they actually send someone out to search my flat for a tv
>refuse to accept it because i have a laptop and tablet that can be used to stream

>>34746858
this is why i would never go for dinners on the first date.

>>34746872

>implying I couldn't smash some fat/lanky skeleton/manlet beta provider who has to pay 100quid dates on okcupid/grindr

strange how taking so much steroids didn't affect my face at all.

>>34746890
Get a good refurbished thinkpad on ebay. They're cheap and solid machines from businesses that upgrade to newer models.

>>34746894
>apply to tell them I do not need a tv license

Moron. Just ignore everything, a letter addressed to "The Legal Occupier" is worthless

>>34746905
Is this a /g/ meme or is it true? I see it mentioned a lot

>>34746872
but police. if some retard threatens you, and you know their name, number, face book, tinder etc, its not going to be hard for the police to arrest them, plus, the bfs are probably faggots.

>>34746914
Yea I just ignore them now. At the time I thought it was a big deal, still pisses me off how crooked they are though.

>>34746894
You need a tv licence by law to watch live tv or iPlayer on any device. Every day you are breaking the law resulting in those comfy overpaid journalists not getting to lounge around making clickbait liberal news stories from their oversized newsroom.

>>34746927

you really think a woman/someone pretending to be gay would have any difficulty having the police side with them and have the beta provider arrested in an instant?

>>34746894
Next time they knock on your door start filming them with your phone. They won't come back again.

>>34746854
No girl wants me. So I go there as I am desperate for some love. I don't enjoy it but I like making other guys feel good because of me.

>>34746947
Good idea lad

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TnGG8SEYDoQ

>>34746894
Do you need one just for owning a TV? I own one but never watch it.

>>34746918
It's true. Compared to that cheap consumer hp shit you see in Argos and Currys, these things outperform and are more durable. They work good with Linux too. Laptop technology hasn't really advanced much in the past few years either.

>>34746945
how would they get the police to side with them? they wouldent take the risk if it meant going to jail, people talk big until you threaten them with the law, i have seen it plenty of times.

>>34746973
no, you only need one to watch television live as it being broadcast

>>34746986
The police always side with women. Always.

If you phone the police when a woman assaults you, the police come and arrest you.

>>34746947
Kek. Fear and intimidation still works great on baby boomers.

>>34746986

cry rape/abuse.

Remember once the guy already paid up and you're telling him goodbye anything he tries afterward will count as rape/stalking/harassment if you tell him to back off and he pushes on.

>>34746980
I was thinking of picking up a laptop just to have for to and from work and stuff might pick one up

>>34746991
I have a tv but never watch anything live. Just streams and torrents. Are they gonna believe me or just assume

>>34747016
They can't get into your house unless you invite them in.

>>34747039
You're inviting them in by answering the door.

>>34747016
Apparently they can tell if you're watching live broadcasts on a computer but I'm not sure if that's just something they say to scare people.

>>34747043
That is not the case.

>>34747039
they're not vampires m8, they will push their way in

>mum still pays for tv licence
>complains about being poor

She just won't believe me when I say you actually can get away without paying this.

>>34747072
If you say no, they can't push their way in.

>>34747091
i'd like to see you stop me

>>34747072

that's an act of aggression mate, you're legally allowed to defend yourself.

>>34747072
Not without police presence and a warrant

>>34747091
Once they got one foot in the door they have the right to get access. They send beefy guys round. They can go in open windows too. Even if you call the police they just stand there and allow it citing it is against the law to not have a tv licence.

>>34747111
they can get this in 5 minutes on the phone, then they'll be coming into your house

hope you haven't got any screens in there

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>>34747100
psssh.. i'd like to see you try..

>>34746996
yeah but her bf is obviously going to be done for assault, and her for aiding if he does anything. he might get arrested too for questioning but not much they can arrest him for if he just has a go at the girl. he could easily show the police the tinder messages etc and explain how he has been manipulated, she might get done for assult too for causing mental injury.

>>34747010
>cry rape/abuse.
unless they have fucked, he wont get charged with rape, and i doubt some random tinder slag would be willing to batter her self to not put up with getting shouted at.

only like 10% of rape cases even get found guilty

>>34747102
They can let themselves in when you're not around.

>>34747122
They can't and they don't. If this ever happens to you then just record it on your phone and the whole thing will be thrown out of court.
>>34747125
You're either stupid as fuck or you need to get better at trolling.

>>34747138
No, no they cannot.

>>34747137

are you seriously saying you can't get any help from police if after the date the beta provider tries to get physical on you IN THE FUCKING CITY CENTRE FULL OF POSH RESTAURANTS?!

the fucking bouncers alone would take care of that cunt, they're always looking for an excuse to get physical.

>>34746968
This gives me an idea. A very autistic idea.

When the dude comes to the door, weird him out by going on a tangent and start talking about anime. Every time he tries to bring it back to the TV license go on another anime tangent.

>>34747160
They literally can. All they need to do is pop by your landlord's, pick up the keys and then come over.

>>34747173
Better idea: come to the door in your boxers, having smeared yourself in pigs blood and holding a knife. Just stare at him.

>>34747177
Even your landlord can't let himself in legally without giving 24 hours notice.

>>34747170
where did i say get physical? i said have a go. bloody ell. obviously if he hits the girl then he is going to get done.

>>34747191
What? That's not what he told me.

>>34747210
Well he's fucking you in the arse then. Look it up.

>>34747170
Is that how you think betas behave?
>I've paid for your dinner so you're going to have sex with me RIGHT HERE AND NOW

>>34747206

just having him grab your arm when you're trying to leave counts as being physical.

When he's paid up and you give him a pity hug and kiss on the cheek he's a stalker if he follows you and if he tries to grab you and make you stay or something then that's already physical harassment.

>>34747185
Is it legal to answer the door while holding a knife?

>>34747223

He can think that way, but he's not gonna get any, and he sure as fuck won't do any actions, being a beta that he is.

What actually happens

>thanks beta fuck, thats really great, lets do this again sometime ill call you, maybe give a pity hug and kiss
>bye
>he gets ignored permanently or if hes kinda cool/super passive then 1-2 more dates then ignore

Then the guy goes to the forums and cries about bitches and fags.

>>34747226
Of course. You can't say "I'm going to stab you" or anything.

>>34747226
Yeah so long as you don't point it at them.

>>34747225
right, but i didnt say that, you are just projecting now. having a go means shouting at her, telling her off etc. tbf, if a guy is willing to take a girl to a fancy restaurant , he probably isnt a beta at all if he has that kinda of money, if he is rich enough, he could fuck up th girls life in other ways.

>>34747256
>tfw only ever get pity sex
>never get to cuddle

>>34747225
It's not harassment. Harassment has a very specific definition involving repeat incidents.

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>>34747271
I'd kill for pity sex

>>34747269
>if a guy is willing to take a girl to a fancy restaurant , he probably isnt a beta at all if he has that kinda of money

Fuck off mate, betas take girls to fancy restaurants all the time and then just live on beans and toast for the rest of the month.

>go to a prossie for the first time to lose my virginity.
>break down crying and spend the time just cuddling her.

why can't I just be normal?

>>34747256
By accepting dinner she's entered a social contract that involves the exchange of sex for dinner.
She's obliged to sleep with him.

>>34747300
Don't worry lad, that probably happens to her a lot.

>>34747293
oh come on, now you are just stereotyping. most guys that take girls to fancy restaurants are people with successful lives, its only one offs guys that do what you describe.

>>34747293
>tfw eating Heinz beans on toasted Tiger bread

top notch cuisine

>>34747085
>ring up TV licencing
>make a no licence needed declaration
>"I do no watch live TV, please stop sending me letters"
Bob's your uncle

>>34747313
Depends what you regard as a successful life. A lot of betas could easily afford to take someone out to a fancy restaurant every now and then. You don't have to be rich to afford a meal in a fancy restaurant once or twice a month.

>>34747269

you serious lol? anyone who actually has to go on a date online is a serious beta provider.

Those guys on IT/whatever degrees making like 40k+ but have almost no social skills/below average looks because they spent it all on their work and studies throw money like crazy on women, they're the kind of people who fucking pay girl streamers on twitch 50$ for no reason.

It goes double for fags, forgot the name but this bodybuilder literally bought an unfurbished house and posted his address asking the fags for shit and he got a full set of furniture/appliances.

fags throw away money like crazy if they like you.

>tfw you finally get around to blocking someone who keeps messaging you

>>34747359
>ask gay man for furnishing and interior design
>he uses his gay flamboyence to design the coolest house plan around

good call desu

>>34747384
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=biqIrB6dQW4

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>>34745931
posting
>I cannot recognize targets when I'm tired.
iktf
early hours 1 eye shut, lying to yourself. "i can do this". getting shot to shit by 12 yr old yanks
yeah i've been there
>>34746337
>tfw, no anime fig to kiss, yet.
i do say morning to her as soon as i'm up though. got a pic on my phone that says morning darling.
>I-it's ironic, I swear
nah, you loooooooooove her. same as i loooooooooove my little 1

>>34747300
>tfw too scared to go to a prossie to lose my virginity
I'm ashamed of my dick because it wont peel back as much as i'd like without pains

>>34747384

there are some people on /fit/ (the hardcore steroid users) who make like 50$ for a 10 minute video on a muscle worship site just flexing a bit, not even naked, some even pay extra if you do humiliation shit on them.

Not nearly at that level yet but defo gonna try whoring around when I'm down to 8% bodyfat, but ill go with the twinky route since I'm not a mass monster.

>>34747422
Good afternoon, Sneklad.

does any one play crusader kings 2 here?

went into town today, had to be near 2 proper smelly people. one was brain disabled so i let her off.

>>34747441

I have done in the past, but the relentless DLC Paradox likes to drip feed just started pissing me off too much.

Also it's a HORRENDOUS time sink.

>>34747457
In what way was her brain disabled? Was she all fucked up?

>>34747457
That was Kay and her son Lee. He's not actually officially brain disabled.

>>34747460
i pirated it so im avoiding paying for all the dlc, i just need some help, im trying to get the whole of the british isles under my rule but francia owns a few bits of wales, is there any way at all i can get these off francia without war?

>>34747471
no but she is
ahahaha ha

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>>34742535
coffee and cum.
>>34744250
>>34744338
I guess he has a new bf :(
>>34744786
have a shower and go to the shop, I'm not sure i can manage it all today though lads.
>>34745931
Love waifu, Love waifu posters and i love all you waifu haters out there Just give me a chance and you will love it
>>34746756
did you like it?
>>34747422
haha cute lad.
>>34747471
>>34747485
don't be rude to mummy kay :^(

>>34747469
she was scruffily dressed and spoke really loudly & incomprehensibly. also at random points she would talk to an empty space about what toothpaste she uses.

i made myself a sandwich today

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>>34747511
you'll poo it out tomorrow

Why can't Lee eat cheese?

>>34747528
Who? dairy lee?

Today I let the plumber in to fix the boiler and made him a cup of premium quality organic green tea. Wish he'd go now because I want to have a joint and a wank before my afternoon nap.

>>34747494
>haha cute lad.
th-thanks, lad
>don't be rude to mummy kay :^(
s-sorry.
it was only a joke. i do love mummy kay, and all the videos (You) post. it's you with the 14 hour collection yeah?

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One hour of fasting left.

I'm going to make it, guys.

>>34747593
Why in the fuck are you fasting?

>>34747572
You know i love you really lad :)

I guess most people here must have every Kay video saved and backed up just in case?

>>34747622
18 hours every day in an effort to stop being a fat fuck. There was some other benefits too but I've forgotten them.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZMT1idEOUnY

feelings of feelings of feelings lads...

got to go JC and get haircut.
2 worst things.
im going to be a wreck when I get back.

Gonna go to the shops in a bit lad, what should I get?

>>34747593
Never tell people that you are fasting. They don't get it.

>>34747648
I lost 8 stone just counting calories and not eating so its quite possible no matter what.

Got CBT at 3:30 cba to have a shower its fucking freezing

>>34747666
Sausages, bacon, eggs, a baguette and 16 cans of lager.

>tfw the powers gone off and the landlord is refusing to fix it despite it not being an issue with the fusebox

>>34747635
yaaay somebody loves me
>I guess most people here must have every Kay video saved and backed up just in case?
errrrrrr.
yeah.
definitely done that. i'm not relying on others to have done it,
but you have got yours safe and secure right?, just incase anything happens to "mine"

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I can hear high schoolers walking past my house, having fun.

It fills me with regret.

>>34747648
What are your height and weight?

>>34747729
im sure you can report them to someone.

>>34747714
what a horrible time to have to go out.
mines 10am Monday morning so im most depressed. but its nice to be back and done by 12. then whole day to myself.

>>34747768
I'm a manlet and I don't know my exact weight, I don't own a scale. I'm visibly fat.

>>34747768
only 5'3 and 19 stone

>>34747714
I was supposed to do CBT with the specialist therapy team's "depression pathway," but I neglected to attend the first session so they referred me back to the care of my GP.

>>34747770
not worth wasting the money, my cousins an electrician so he'll come round later today

>>34747759
My kay vids are safe along with my cooking with jack and joey ones.

>>34747770
I go to lidl to get some shopping its really quiet and pick up a kfc so its not so bad

>>34747782
Its a waste of time tbqh but i do it every fortnight to keep my bennies at higher rate

>sitting at computer waiting on food delivery
>get a text saying the delivery will be early
>two minutes later phone starts buzzing
>i know it's the delivery so I go the door
>there within ten seconds
>phone still going off in my pocket
>the delivery driver is pushing the trolley back towards his van
What a cunt.

>today's google doodle is about some "white" brazilian who looks like robbie rotten in half her pictures.
Why?

>>34747935
>pushing the trolley back towards his van
>trolley
Wtf just how much food did you order?

>>34747898
Careful what you say around these here parts nowadays, senpai. The walls doth have cables leading back to the corridors of power and madness.

>>34747997
Not a trolley trolley, one of those folding trolleys for carrying boxes

>>34747422
It''s the worst. I'll sweep a room, and not notice the guy's leg poking out from under a desk and get shot in the back. I'll peek a corner, and find myself staring into Bandit's calming eyes, and not realize I'm looking at a bad guy until I'm already filled with lead.

It's like I see the fuckers, just don't realize I'm meant to shoot 'em. Like my body's on autopilot.

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kinda strugglin with my work plan this week, lads.
anyone know something good that will pad it out?

>>34746274

Only if you have to go more than once a week to wherever they send you.

I connect with this penguin on a spiritual level

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mnTU_hJoByA

>tfw my poos smell so bad my flatmate moved out because of it
>exposed it on facebook
>everyone knows me as the guy who has smelly poos

jesus fucking christ i thought we were adults theyre like kids

>>34746158
We aren't. We're hard as fucking nails when it comes to recovery from injuries. Moreso than most other animals

help lads
my mate thinks I might be asexual
is it normal to get an erection just from looking at porn? because I don't get that

just walking through the yard on my way into work, and it's fucking snowing. only a bit but hope there's some more to come. only 7 hrs till hometime.

>>34748382
Isn't that more to do with modern medicine and hygiene than anything physical?

>>34748376
>shocked because your poos smell
They are children

>>34748396
unless im really fucking horny, normal porn never causes me to pop a boner

>>34748424
what does cause you to pop a boner then? I have no idea what's normal, grew up in a religious family without questioning anything so I think I've maybe got some repression/suppression issues

>>34748396
I almost always get a erection looking at porn. especially if its something i am 'into'...

>>34748376
>pooing in the loo
There's your problem

>>34748404
Nah lad, we've always been more resistant to physical trauma.

I'm so hungry
But there's nothing in the house


Mummy won't be back until at least half 6, I'll have starved by then

>>34748376
I thought that when I first started working. I though I was immature but it's a whole new level.

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Caught myself wrapped in a blanket sipping hot chocolate earlier, tfw I've become a living stereotype

>>34748623
tfw mommy literally just brought me hot chocolate,
we're all stereotypes now

>>34745639
No. All the girls were over 18 m8

>>34748623
I want a blanked just like pepe's so I can be smug while I'm being snug.

>>34748668
>tfw literally going to eat some tendies later

>>34748677
Ah just a rapist then, fair enough.

5 (97% pork) sausages, 4 Applewood smoked bacon rashers, 2 fried eggs, grilled tomato halves and a slice of fried wholemeal bread.

Nice lunch to soak up all these pint cans of Stella I bought. For a man has not long on this earth to eat, drink and be merry before the worm getteth him!

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-4206906/Nurse-died-snorting-cocaine-mixed-vet-medicine.html

:^)

F-Fuck lads...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M6tyBX1yClc

>>34748894
>this freak has had a girlfriend AND a boyfriend

I am getting on a train to Woking and I am fixing this.

So I have Oblivion, Morrowind, and Witcher 1 in my Steam library and have never played any of them. Which should I play first? Liked Skyrim and Witcher 3, and thats about all the games I have played. I am too pleb for /v/

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>>34745931
Have you pre-ordered your waifu's hoodie yet?

http://www.amiami.com/top/detail/detail?gcode=GOODS-00139481&page=top%2Fsearch%2Flist%3Fs_keywords%3Dfate%2Fgrand+order%24pagemax%3D40%24getcnt%3D0%24pagecnt%3D1

Joan of Arc one is cuter desu.

>>34748918
I'd go for morrowind cause it's the oldest

>>34748932
No, I haven't come out as a weeb yet lad.

Plus, I'm fine with my military jackets. Got my watchmen and peace symbol pins in, and I don't like hoodies.

>>34748932
POO UMI

fwb keeps sending me pictures of his boipucci but i just want to play total war and relax.

ECH.

>>34749123
Poopoo? d

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>>34747122
lol you need to brush up on your law my son. Bailiffs/any other kind of hired thug is just a private citizen like you, they have absolutely no powers over you or your property unless backed by a warrant and if that's the case they will almost always be accompanied by the police.
Seriously how can you be so much of a cuck to believe that because someone wears a fluorescent jacket and carry an id card they have any kind of legal power?

One of my favourite quotes - "The poorest man may in his cottage may bid defiance to all the forces of the crown. It may be frail - its roof might shake, the wind may blow through it, the storm may enter, the rain may enter - but the King of England cannot enter, and all his forces dare not cross the threshold of the ruined tenement"

There's a lot wrong with our country but we have probably the best legal system in the world, feels good.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-york-north-yorkshire-38917557

>be lousy in bed
>get accused of rape

All these false rape claims.Why would anyone bother with women?

>>34749001
Shame, you could've been the coolest kid in the street with that draped over you.

>>34748677
>All the girls were over 18 m8

Nonce is not term used solely for kiddy smashers mate. You're a nonce by default if you are a convicted sex fiend.

>>34746495
Is that why the sandniggers are trying to get into the country? Because of the great taste of Tango?

>>34749267
>Bartholomeo Joly de Lotbiniere
he did it. deport now.

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>>34745931
I woke up after ~11 hours of sleep and I'm very tired
Waifuposting is gay, lol

waited in the hospital for five hours last night because one of my housemates tried to OD on paracetamol and had tons of self inflicted bite marks and scratches on her

>tfw you get bored of waiting two hours in

I'm a bit hyperactive today lads.

>>34749390
>waiting 5 hours for an attention seeking roastie

lad...

>>34749390
>tried to OD on paracetamol
Why waste you time? People who want to die don't bloody grab the paracetamol.

>>34749390
>he thinks waiting on her hand and foot will endear her towards him

You're being played for a sucker by an attention seeker. You are genuinely a cuck for getting her an ambulance.

>>34749390
>>34749390
>waited in the hospital for five hours last night because one of my housemates tried to OD on paracetamol and had tons of self inflicted bite marks and scratches on her

She might let you eat chads creampie now.

>>34749407
she's not a roastie shes a got a touch of the autism and shes a 2/10 lesbian

had to stay with her to keep an eye on her because our other housemates weren't in town

>>34746968
Are these people even legally allowed to stay on your property?

>>34749437
>lesbian AND self harms
wew that's some next level need for attention
She should consider herself lucky to have orbiters such as yourself who still pander to her

>>34749437
I hope this is just you trolling.

>>34749443
Voilating the NAP real hard

>>34749267
I was gonna post this

Apparently she texted him afterwards grilling him about how uncomfortable she felt asking for an apology. What a bitch, I would have told her to fuck off, it's her fault too if I can't get it up.

>>34749510
I think if he kept the texts he should be ok.
I can't think of any situation in which a raped girl would be chasing after her rapist before going to the police.

>>34749390
I'll probably get bullied for saying this, but as long as you did this out of the kindness of you heart, rather than as an attempt to get laid, you did the right thing.

>>34749494
The what m8? Imagine if they did that shit in burgerland, these licensing nazis would be getting legally shot every week.

>>34749541
Fucking as if. When was the last time he went out to help the homeless?

Any /lads/ estranged from their parents? Just wondered like.

>>34749390
there's another number to add to the statistics showimh women """attempt""" suicide more than men

>>34749553
Its a libertarian,specifically ancap, principle that basically means if someone is coming on to your property theyre being agressive to you and you can use self defence against them. At least in basic terms. Its a bit of a meme desu

>check the BBC to see if there's any cool local news
It's not exactly cool, but it might be an interesting read
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-derbyshire-38827361

can I come live with one of you lads in liverpool? I'm sick of living with my parents.

>>34746980
>Laptop technology hasn't really advanced much in the past few years either.

Is that because of low sales or just the architecture hitting its limits on what they can shrink it to?

lads im a fat shit and im gonna start swimming to lose weight

how do i get past the massive embarrassment of showing my disgusting body to strangers

>>34749668
Most interesting to happen in my county is some one nicked some accordions
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-berkshire-38919379

>>34749708
no one cares about you, just go

>>34749708
Most people are disgusting and have no shame. If you're lucky enough to have a 24 hour pool you can go at 3am or some shit.

Swimming is great for losing weight, I'd do the same but the chlorine in the water would fuck up my glorious hair.

>moved to a new place
>want to get a chinese
>worried about the portion sizes

The inner jew in me coming out, 4 quid seems too cheap for a chinese

>>34749708
>look at that fat fuck making an effort to improve himself, I'll be sure to think about him and his fat body for the rest of my life.

>>34749762
4 quid for what? One dish or a few?
I thought those little plastic boxes were the standard portion size dictated by chinese govt.

>>34749708
I work as a lifeguard in a swimming pool. Always hilarious to see whales like you coming in and "swimming" in god knows what, I'll be sure to snap a sly picture of you to put in the staff room so we can have a good laugh about it.

Drunk again, had terrible shits last night. Thinking it was from the drink I drunk but oi vey such is life

>>34749743
does chlorine really make your hair worse? mine is amazing and girls are always jelly of it

>>34749794
It dries the shit out of it and makes it a frizzy nightmare that's harder to detangle and breaks more often. It can also give your hair a green hue if you're blonde.

>>34749776
just one dish lad but they're listed under main dishes

>>34749762
>>34749776
Chinese is fucking weird.

They're always the most expensive of the take aways but because all the food they sell is for 2 or more people. So if you're billy no mates like most of us you're either paying an arm and a leg for dinner and too much food or you're buying one thing like 10 chicken balls or shrimp chow mein that doesn't really fill you.

>eating after 8s
>before 4pm

>>34748932
Blacklisted from AmiAmi for missing a preorder payment because I forgot I ordered something like 8 months before.

ONE payment.

I understand that it must be annoying for them so I'm not complaining too much but it does kind of annoy me how people on /a/ talk about getting 2, sometimes even 3 chances with a warning but for me they were just like "Naa these are the rules, we will no longer be fulfilling your orders"

Feels bad man, I could probably just use a different email or something but I can't be fucked, it's probably for the best since I spend too much money on my anime shit.

>>34749668
>>34749719
http://www.shropshirestar.com/news/property/2017/02/09/shrewsbury-flaxmill-regeneration-will-go-ahead-as-project-lands-extra-7-9-million/

Some crumbling old building is getting a 7.9 million in funding for restorations, the place should have been demolished years ago. Its like in that southpark episode when they gentrify Kennys street (the surrounding area to one side is chav land).

The only reason they are doing it is to make it look more visually appealing to the middle class houses on the other side of the railway tracks since it peers over the treetops and they aren't allowed to knock it down.

>>34749876
sounds fairly standard to me then, should be a decent amount of food in the tub
I can usually only eat one meat tub and one rice tub before I feel really full

>>34749904
Far too many building are listed, it's fucking madness. They're not culturally or historically important, and most don't even look worth preserving.

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Slept 12 hours again, days just flowing by without doing anything at all. This is the very definition of hell

>>34749987
>This is the very definition of hell

t. someone who's never had insomnia

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>>34749929
Agreed. Whilst this one does have some minor historical significance it certainly doesn't warrant keeping it around and pumping millions into it. There has been talk of turning it into apartments or as a site for a proposed college campus.

Red line is the dividing train tracks and the blue is a pathway connecting both sides via a tunnel, if they knock the building own then they will probably end up with more undesirables coming over but it they do nothing house prices will suffer because it looks like shit peeking over the trees.

I know people on both sides of the tracks.

Hit a level of bordom at work that I've started to draw the staple remover on my desk

>>34750051
>if they knock the building own
if they knock the building down*

>>34750067
Is this that sense of productivity wageslaves tell me they'd become depressed and kill themselves if they lived without?

>>34750107
Maybe. I don't know what normal people do. I fucking hate it personally and it makes me want to kill myself. Lack of this would probably give me a new lease on life

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>>34750067
>tfw I drew Akari from Yuru Yuri on my desk

Need to use the M6, should I go toll road or normal?

Talking of listed buildings, I really want to buy up a country estate and turn it into a rent-free home for NEETs and shut-ins with neetbux only required for food and living expenses.

I'd be fucking well up for it if I could get a Euromillions win

>>34750156
How would you separate the hoards of freeloading scum from the true robots?

>>34750156
>i want to win the lottery and open up a gypsy camp

your life m8

>>34750167

Hand-pick from around places like the chans and not advertise it. Also require as a residence contract that you not speak about neet sanctuary, not ever discuss neet sanctuary outside of the estate's grounds.

>>34750167
track how often they go outside

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>Game keeps trying to give you a giantess fetish
I just want to fight servants.

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> read through "Sent Mail" from years ago
> from the tone I can tell I was happier, I remember I felt happier

Lads. Seriously, what the fuck happened?

>>34750174

Plus I'm pretty sure there was a lottery winner who did something like that I think. Real scumbag, but he had some great keks.

Brought up a large country house/farm and just turned the land into a private banger racing track to dump shit, smash it up, have private raves, do drugs and set it on fire, fucked all the poshos off the lived around the area.

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>>34750130
Truely a masterpiece

>>34749708
>im a fat shit

How fat is 'fat' lad? (Height also required).

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>>34750051
Some of the concept art for places like this are hilarious, they always show sunshine and very clean looking people.

The readily is this place is located next to one of most run down estates in town, it won't last five minutes without being vandalized or set on fire by local hooligans.

>>34750258
Don't give up the day job lad.

>>34749708
If people look at you it's only from admiration as you're making the right choice to be healthy

>>34750258
Looks like a frog with an artificial leg.

>>34750134
Do you want to get to your destination quicker or not?

>>34750300
>The readily is
reality*

The Dyslexia bandit strikes again.

>>34750306
Cant say I was planning on it

>>34750312
Sounds more exciting that what it really is.

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>>34750258
Pretty good, lad. I thought you meant you drew out onto your desk,though.

>>34750341
Oh yeah it could have been read that way. My bad. People walk behind me at work a lot so sadly I cant

I just arrived in UK, I'm gonna stay for 2 years.

I'm staying in a shitty hotel in Ilford, I feel completely alone and aimless that I cried a bit.

I haven't visited any place at all, just went straight to the hotel watching TV and browsing 4chan, I don't even want to leave my room.
I thought this was gonna be the big change of my life.

What should I do?

>>34747359
>anyone who actually has to go on a date online is a serious beta provider.

not really. online dating is pretty normal now. some people dont have the chance to meet people in real life because they are busy working. yeah, some rich people can be beta but that doesent mean most are.

>>34750366
why did did you come to the uk?

>>34750323
yes

i do

come on robot