What was the last autistic thing you said to a girl?

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>>34686826
>fancy a bum?

Shit i cant remember
Says alot huh?

>>34686826
>Are you ready to Make America Great Again! I think Trump has some pretty good policies.

I said this to a qt American exchange in the UK. She studies Environmental Science. She doesn't talk to me anymore.

I had a nice conversation with a qt from my class and I got so comfortable I started inserting 'dude' between sentences like I talk to most of my mates, she started looking at me weird

Just erase me

>>34686826
>I feel like there's a major age gap between us, so talking just feels weird for me

We were only like a year or two apart, but I meant to imply "maturity" and she understood what I said as "you're old and it's weird for me." She actually has her shit together and I still don't.

>>34686826
I tolled my psychologist that she had a nice voice.. I know she wants to fuck me over and get my NEETBUX taken away

>>34686979
>tolled

Fucking retard.

>>34686826
>when you kill the captain he will drop an elemental cannon that you have to use to destroy the corresponding servitor

Accidentally put on a really deep voice standing next to a qt grill
Also pic related
>for context she thought I was crushing on her and I wanted to say otherwise
>I thought it was normal but apparently it's spergy

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>>34687112
Forgot to upload pic related

>>34686826
I dont remember the last time I even talked to a girl irl, but I assume whatever I said was very autistic

>ight I'm not gonna deal with your shit today talk to you some other time
I sperged out didnt I

>I think I love you because I think about you a lot
She answered 'okay I guess' and I cut contact with her 3 days later. I'm not gonna tell something like that anymore, that was just pathetic

>>34686826
"I'm not interested, you're ugly"

I regret saying that every fucking day

>>34686892
she probably realized you're an idiot

>>34687112
>>34687135
>>I thought it was normal but apparently it's spergy
no no no not at all anon. you did good. fact is, you did so good she might start taking a liking to you.

>>34686826
I don't really talk to girls and if you do you need to gtfo

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>>34686826
I revealed my power level. It's too cringy to repeat here but I'll just say it had nothing to do with politics.

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>>34686867
Next level autism
I approve

>>34687790
Even your mom? You brain dead faggot

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Why did I doubt her

>>34687808
>too cringy to repeat here
You've obviously never been on 4chan lad

I doubt it's as bad as half the things on here

>>34687849
>Why did I doubt her
it wasnt that you doubted her, it was that you mentioned it. she took it as a challenge.

>>34686826
>"Hi, how are you?"
First and last thing I've said to a girl in a few months.

>>34687881
I wanted to see if she would come back. She did before. She didn't that time. I hate being so confrontational and argumentative

MY NAME IS DAN
I HAVE NO EMOTIONS REEEEEEEEEEE

>>34687864
Okay to rephrase, it's too cringey for me to want to remind myself by typing it. The look of disgust on her face is burned into my mind.

>>34686826

>can i get a lap dance

>>34688006
Explain senpai, I may have a similar story

>>34687904
>>34687849
Jfc why are such a needy little bitch? I've told female friends I wanted them, and when they say no, the best thing is to not be such a little bitch and beg them to say yes. You drove her away by being such a beta bitch

>>34686826
"do you have a boyfriend"
"can i be your boyfriend"
it sounded so weak back then, must be why I failed

>>34688045
What should I do instead, great sage? I obviously don't get many opportunities

Is telling a girl at the bar to fuck off autistic or alpha af?

>>34688081
DON'T PRESSURE HER

It's not that hard to understand? Are you just retarded? You think constantly asking her and giving her ultimatums is going to make her fall in love with you?

You lost her the minute you fell into the friend zone. If you want to date/fuck a girl, don't become a close friend

>>34687896
Use a good ice breaker pickup line that's funny.

>>34687849
her pussy is so full of chads dick right now

>>34687841
doesn't count, fuck you fat sack of shit

>>34687098
Destiny is for autists

>>34688126
I wanted to know what she thought, whenever I had asked her she said that she needed more time to think or that she didn't know

>>34688148
Her pussy is being filled by this faggot who talks to plenty of other girls and is only going for her because HE KNOWS her gullible desperate for attention ass will do anything he wants

>>34688220
arguing over who is the most robot instead of watching porn while standing awkwardly in world of warcraft

get a life nerds

>>34686826
I don't want to even remember. My short memory is the only thing keeping me from killing myself.

>>34688126
different anon here, but I always imagined romance as two people growing gradually closer and doing fun shit together until they realise they're better than best friends... insert fug here

Apparently the cruel world has it that love is an angry overcompensating manlet flexing in front of a pair of labia, before rapidly jumping up and fucking.

Man, fuck books. If I was illiterate I'd at least never get invested into this fantasy. I want my fucking fairy tale

>>34688291
i hope that's vanilla you're playing

>>34688325
Poster of the text here, and this. That's how it was, we hung out all the time, got close, talked openly about sex and everything. Next thing you know, I'm cucked watching her text Chad about how good he looked today.

>>34688126

FRIEND ZONE ISNT A REAL THING

GIRL EITHER FINDS YOU ATTRACTIVE OR DOES NOT

YOU CALL IT FRIENDZONE BECAUSE YOU CANT ACCEPT GIRL SIMPLY DOESNT FIND YOU ATTRACTIVE

>>34688325
That kind of stuff does still happen, but I think people become more jaded and pragmatic as they age, and generally people who haven't paired off by a certain age have something wrong with them.

>>34686826
Is this fucking asmr darling omg

>>34688402
fuck off no it doesn't

two lonely people desperately trying to fill a void meet, think each other is hot, like each other, and think the other will like them back and then awkwardly hang around with each other trying to force a fake superficial love until they do nothing but argue and then one of them fucks someone else

thats dating

>>34686826
I asked a girl if she had Munchhausen syndrome at a party a couple of years ago. I've probably only talked to one or two girls since then.

probably nothing at all

i was shoveling snow and i almost bumped into a girl walking on the sidewalk. she stops and says " sorry! .... good morning!" while i stand there waiting. it felt like a year passed before she started walking again.

>>34688589
Whatever helps you sleep at night anon. Or keeps you up.

>>34688778
you'll learn when you're old enough to date

>>34686898
Lol'd
>>34687736
Soon you Will become a normie

>>34687005
Yeah she drove past his toll booth, and when she handed him the quarter he lifted the gate and said "you have a nice voice," nothing retarded about it

>>34686826
"I was just trying to get your number in a cute way, no need to be so fucking mean"

I tried to be aloof and cool, so when a girl started talking about herself I literally said "I don't care." She stopped talking and walked away.

>>34689244
Where do you live that tolls are a quarter?

Told my boss at work that she smells nice.

Don't know what I was thinking desu. Sometimes you just get in that comfortable zone and your autism filter goes away. Lucky I didn't get fired.

>>34688844
>resorts to straw-manning and ad hominem in one sentence
Looks like I win, not surprising considering your position is a simplistic blanket statement.

>>34689445
what's wrong with that?

your work place must suck

I told a co-worker she was very bendy once and nobody thought anything of it

>>34689528
You literally did those exact things with nothing else in the response to my original post lol

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"Say nigger!"

>>34689585
You clearly don't know the definition of straw manning or ad hominem then

Said it to a friend of mine but around a girl I had a crush on. Was after a music performance, we're all musicians. I'm a senior and so is she my friend is a junior I think. It's winter formal that night but the district honor band was doing itsome performance that night. We were some of the only people from our school there. And we were talking about how Noone showed up to watch the performance

Girl- says something along the lines of I tried to advertise it to people/ there not cool enough to be here. (I don't quite remember)

Me- well remember there are people who aren't going to formal or the performance andata are just sitting at home because there nother cool enough to go to either.

(Get this lads, I follow it with)

Me: "why would you go to formal or here if you could stay home and get some of that sweet hand action."

I said it a little louder than I should have and because I was nervous even being around her I laughed really loud and doubled over, it was probably the most faked thing I've ever done.

>>34686826

"Yeah you're alright. We don't click honestly. You stay in your corner and I will stay in mine"

followed immediately: fuck off

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>>34688285
>beta maximus

>>34686898
I have to catch myself from doing exactly that when talking to girls

>>34689974
The worst part is it isn't even that bad, you just made the situation so much worse

>>34688285
>>34687849
>being so aggressive.

2 issues:
1) You're not a robot. Just a failed normie.
2) when a grill is attracted to you, you literally don't have to do anything. she will come to you.

>>34690355
I say "dude" and "man" all the time talking to girls. Never got a negative reaction

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>>34690772
The friend of minexpensive is the only guy I ever see her hang out with, but he's like 5'6" with a studder and I heard from a friend of the girls that he's friendzoned but It seems alot of the time that she goes up to him, and it has me paranoid.

Just feels bad

>>34690823
>implying that I want to be normie

In response to her saying that she took a semester abroad to do a school centered on backpacking. "Did you learn much about backpacking or school?"

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Just a few minutes ago

>>34686826
Girl I'm orbiting despite not really wanting to fuck her anymore has to give her dog away, so me in my infinite autistic wisdom decided to message her with "Selling the doggo?"

That was earlier today.

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I honestly can't remember

The only people I talk to of the opposite sex are my mom and my grandma

I haven't talked to someone not my family in several months

Is this a problem

"kek"

not original but true

>>34686826
oh wow! your pussy doesn't stink at all! oh, wait. i mean it stinks worse than anything.

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i think she liked it though

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This was a few months ago

Stacy: Hey anon, do you have a significant other?

Anon: haha, no I never had a girlfriend.

Stacy: Haha okay

They all looked at me oddly after that.

>>34688068
Would it be pathetic if chad said it?

>>34688399
When I was younger, I believed in the friend zone.
As I got older, I made this realization.

It became very clear to me when I made female friends I found attractive but I didn't want to fuck or couldn't fuck.

>at a fastfood place
>qt at the counter hands me my food
>says "Have a nice meal!"
"Y-You too!"
>she starts giggling

True story

>>34687774
>autists teaching autists to be autists

Autists

>>34693234
How does that emoji look so fucking uncomfortable

>>34693280
yeah keep tellin yourself that buddy

>>34686826
i havent spoken to a girl in about 2 years

most is those brief interactions with female cashiers. i dont even look them in the eye just hand them the money and leave

>my dog did a poop hol up

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>>34686826
>'when's your next class?'
>'one (pm)'
>sounded like she said 'what''
>'i said, when's your next class'
>rinse and repeat
>third time i finally realize shes saying '1' and not 'what'
>'oh nice, me too. okay i gotta go eat bye'

>>34686826
We fucked and as she was leaving my place that morning I threw up the deuces and yelled "Peace!" as my front door closed.

>>34693333
Are you telling me that woman can find you attractive and then due to lack of immediate action, think you are ugly?

That's fucking retarded. I've seen long time friends hook up.

>girl is alone at a disco while her friends are making out
>approach her
>"hey, you were left alone, he he"
>"what?"
>"nothing"
>leave the club

I was very drunk and then I realized she was ugly.

>>34693327
because she wants my D so bad

I can't remember the last thing I said to a girl.

>>34693333
those quads tho

>>34686892
Just tell her that you only wanted to start a.conversation with her and that was the only American you could think of
"" origano

>>34686826
>Asked what i like to do for fun.
"All i do is go to bed late ALRIGHT? I am not a very interesting person"

>>34693385
>I've seen long time friends hook up.
Unrelated but these kinds of hookups are fucking god-tier and drain your balls until you have negative cum from the force of the heavens milking your cock into your long time female friend.

>>34687849
You fucked up. Should've just said ok bye lol instead of all that extra. With bitches less is more.

>be pizza delivery driver
>pull up to house
>bitch doesn't answer the door
>call the number on the ticket, she answers and says she'll be right out
>comes, pays for her pizza, and I hand it to her
>she says mmmm smells good
>"th-thanks you too"

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>>34686826
Wew lads you're gonna love this one

>restocking drinks for store I work
>mug root beer is low with some others
>write on paper "fug root beer :DD - need 5 bottles"
>"okay anon you can go on break" -my female coworker right after I write it
>"okay cool, I already wrote down the drinks we need restocked"
>"oh good!" She takes the list and heads to the back
>I go to the break room
>sit down
>stare at wall
>realization.jpg

>>34694765
kekekek
origs

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"THE POWER OF STRAWBERRY AND BASILICOOO" on the melody of Hasseloff's "True Survivor" playing in the background, while playing air guitar.
GF giggled.

>>34686979
Wow, looks like the therapy is working, you're still completely paranoid and cannot take anything at face value, even a compliment that you YOURSELF give to somebody else.

I dont remember the last time i said anything to a grill that wasnt a part of my family

>>34686826
the last autistic thing I did was use
>meme arrows
in a text message reply

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>>34687849
>nah thats you adios

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i forgot that textless posts on /r9k/ were not allowed to be posted

>>34694967
wow you sound like a faggot

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>>34695422
Gee, that didn't really happen to you right?

>>34695721
found it in another /r9k/ thread, hence the 4chan filename

>>34686826
ASMRDarling is a goddess.

>>34695422
People really do over think shit when trying to talk to girls they like.

>>34696234
She is overrated and looks like she will age badly.

>>34693293
If it was a playful giggle, she took it as a joke and you're in the clear. If she was actually laughing at you, it's autism.

>>34686826
>"Why haven't we fucked yet "
Thanks /b/

>girl I've known since childhood sits down next to me
>continue looking straight ahead

>>34686826
hello


originale

>>34686826
A girl asked me what I was doing after I graduated ( I'm a senior) and I told her I was gonna try to get a job building "The Wall"

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>grill "i want to suck ur dick anon"
>me "na idk haha bye"

I apologized to a hooker for not being able to stay hard enough to have sex with her.

>what's your blood type?

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>>34697570
In a similar vein
>"We should get into bed ,anon. I'm really feeling you"
>She leans in for kissing
>"I-is thought this was just to smoke the weed!, I'm worried I'll catch something off you!"
>"I'm clean, really! I've been celibate for months now anyways!"
>"All the same, no thanks... Are you going to pass that bong, or let it burn out?"

Needless to say I ruined a perfectly good weeds hook up, but I still think it was worth. I may like weed but I don't need my life ruined over it.

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I tripped acid in my bedroom alone last month. I started to freak out so I messaged a girl on Facebook (for a small sense of security) and I ranted to her about how I relate to her because we're both NEET and haven't done shit with our lives at all approaching 21. Then I told her how brave she was because she had a condition where she basically can't do any serious work (physical or mental) halfway through the day because of brain issues and how she was going to die by 30-35 because of it. When the trip was done I contemplated deleting her but she told me it was cool.

Pic related is me reading what I sent her the following morning.

>>34686826
>meet qt at party
>we drink, have fun, cuddle a bit while sitting next to each other
>she hints that she'll have trouble getting home
>invite her to stay at my hotel room (I was on vacation, she was a local)
>she accepts, we go to my room
>she undresses
>"Hey, uh just in advance, sorry if I get a boner while laying next to you"
I really thought I was ultra friendzoned

>>34697738
so what the fuck did you tell her exactly, homo? show us

>>34697648
followed by her saying "I don't think you need to know that"

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>>34697786
There's no way I'm showing what I actually said because even now I get red and had to close my eyes scrolling past it to screencap this (which i sent her afterwards)

I made a qt drop spaghetti at work, but only because I gave her something weird to answer to

There's this big black thing you have to put trash bags in when you're changing them, and I borrow mine from the bakery department. So I go to return it, and it's close to the bakery's dishwashing sinks, which she's working (it's closing time)

I run into her as I'm mopping later while she's stocking bread and I'm like "yeah I was returning the elephant and you were there, doing dishes. I wanted to say something" and she said "oh yeah, I was there, in the.. dish area". There was a beat. Then I complimented her glasses

>>34697821
>dat politeness

i bet money that you upset her somehow. that much fucking ceremony over a bad acid trip is usually a giveaway.

definitely not as autistic as this

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQG41-gizy4

>>34697738

>do mdma for first time
>tell girl all about how I have no empathy and am nice to everybody just because I can
>had to not talk to her for several months to gain some semblance of social power