Who here failed at suicide?

There are easier ways than risking injury and a non lethal takedown.

>>34585016
I'm brown all I need to do is take apart a digital clock put the circuits and led screen around a metal case, connect a faux detonator walk into a federal police department building, start walking around yell I have a bomb and scream Allah akber. Seems ez.

>>34584989
Don't do it, you have us fellow robots who have equally shit lives.
Instead become, like us, someone who hates the world, has dead eyes and is cynical.
You can chose to keep your hatred and realize the world is shit or give up and enjoy your melancholy. Both good choices.

I decide to kill myself every week or so but i always change my mind halfway through the plan

>>34584989
>Death by cop
Jesus christ you sad fuck making someone else take you out because you're too pussy to do it yourself. Just dont be a fuckup for once next time if you are really serious

>>34585086
Not OP but in the moments my sadness and depression turn to rage I can actually function a bit and get things done. Same for anyone else?

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>no friends
>all girls hate me
>parents disappointed in me
>finally breakdown at work one day
>go to bridge
>prepare to jump off
>look down
>"oh fuck that's high up, I could die"
>realize I'm an idiot
>go home alive

That was an interesting moment in my life. I realized that life really isn't that important and all the small stuff can be overshadowed my wonderful pleasures like food or vidya. I also realized that if life truly gets awful, suicide will always be an option, which is comforting.

>>34585103
I am too pussy to hang myself. Plus pretty sure at least /pol/ would find it funny that another Muslim was killed in Sydney by a cop.

>>34584989
Join <pupper pals>

I kind of see suicide as the only solution to my problems. Whatever I do, learn, become, it won't matter. I'll still be me and unable to make genuine human connections. I know that if I do ever attempt suicide I will 100% succeed. I won't leave room for failure. I'm not going to be that guy who "tried to kill himself" and then tells everyone about it for sympathy. I don't want to make the people in my life lives harder than they need to be. At least if I die my parents and family can glorify the best parts of me and forget the day to day reality. I'm sure they'd get over it in a few years.

>skipping the tl;dr
>went "night hiking"
>had a shotgun in my backpack
>loaded only one bullet, its a shotgun, why would i need more
>climb to the top and look at my hometown
>time to an hero
>the shotty somehow jams
>not my first time with guns
>but it just doesnt wanna work
>eventually it unjams and fires off into the sky

Like i said i had only one shell. It also wasnt my first time trying to suicide. Like all things in my life, im even a failure trying to kill myself. Ive reached the point where ive accepting i literally can not die. I will spend my immortally shit posting on an australian frog catching forum

>>34585143
>depression and life continue for years.
>few years spent away from everyone after high school
>suicide looks better every day
>one guy I know urges me to apply as a councilor for a group of teenagers camping in the mountains for a week
>lol I can't even take care of myself
>decide to do it anyway for some reason
>Get there and try my best to do my job
>be friendly and act responsible, who knew I could do this
>the kids like me, my heart feels joy it hadn't for years
>go hiking one day to a cliffside, we tell the kids to stay on the path
>I stand on the edge once we reach the top
>I stare for a long time, I could actually die a little happy right now if I just took one more step.
>Little girl camper yells at me from the path "mister anon what are you doing?"
>I look back, her eyes are worried
"NNothing, just checking out the view"
>iI fake smile and walk back to the main group, hope she didn't know.

Tfw

>>34584989

If you're in Amerifat land you CANNOT fail at suicide. Buy a shotgun and shoot yourself in the head, if you do anything else which isn't ridiculouslyr reliable you didn't seriously attempt it.

>>34585453
From gaystralia where guns are illegal.

>>34585542
are tall buildings illegal too?

>>34584989
I can be your friend if you want anon.
Well, not your friend since I'm not talkative and I don't believe you can make friends that easily, but you can rant and whatever to me while I listen or something.

>>34585016
Stick with the prod.

>>34585453
headshot isn't 100% reliable either and you might just wind up paralyzed in a hospital with half a brin for 80 years

>>34585236
you I like

I hope you dont need to
but if you do I hope you succeed

>30yo autistic manchild
>Spend my days playing vidya, getting pissed off at said vidya, watching anime and wallowing in depression
>Can barely look after myself
>Want to be normal and outgoing but despise being around people
>Takes me a good while to work up the courage just to go to the shops
>Feel completely useless most of the time
>Not sure if I really want to die but I feel like suicide/death is the only way out of this. I feel tired of this and want out
>Attempted to throw myself off a cliff multiple times but couldn't get myself to go near the edge
>Thought about jumping off motorway bridges a few times but doubt I could get my arse over the railing
>Took a bunch of anti-depressants once but it just turned my shit to water.

That's my failures so far. With my bennies being cut soon, I'm gonna have to force myself to end it somehow because there's no chance of me being able to work.I can't even look after myself or my home properly. Getting hit by a train seems the best option for me.

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>>34585366
>>Little girl camper yells at me from the path "mister anon what are you doing?"
What a beautiful moment.Hope the view was good!
Just imagine this situation felt weird.

>>34585078
Kek, makes me wonder how many of you guys actually tried to commit suicide this way and ISIS claimed responsibility.

Took a lit of pills that I got when I was involuntarily hospitalized. The whole night I had spasms my body felt like it was dying I was itchy all over and I just had the super strong feeling of impending doom. It was a traumatic experience. If only I had died now I can't even try again cause of that fear.

>>34586517
lmao

underrated tall building comment

> Realize people are dumb long ago
> Realize people are shit long ago
> Realize that 2017 means more migrants
> Realize nothing is going for the better
> Why live?
> Why am I such a pussy?
> Why am I not like Katya? Gifted, pretty, won the genetic lottery.
> I have a GF and I don't wanna ruin her life.

-sigh-

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>be depressed autistic edge teenager (15) who listening death metal
>my mommy take a mp3 player full of my favorite musiks (actually it was hide) she thinks music makes me not having friends
>argue with mommy and had a big fight
>lost
>it's so unfair and angry
>tried to jump on the apartment.
>ohhh shieet it;s high
>mommy surprised and take me off

mommy you was wrong you was wrong

>be autistic
end me

>>34589366
Stop roleplaying as a frog child

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>>34584989
but do u look like this?

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>>34585366
>"NNothing, just checking out the view"
god damn

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>>34589430
i'm not even joking
nobody can't imagine how autistic i was at that time srsly fucking ADHD was worst at that time

>>34589430
make me you dopey autistic cuntface nigger

>>34589494
FUCK YOU CRAB FACED KEK. GET SOMEONE TO HOLD A BOOT OUT THE SIDE OF THEIR CAR WINDOW SO THEY CAN KICK YOU IN THE HEAD AT 70 MILES AN HOUR

>wanted to jump in front of a train
>they fucking saw me on the tracks at the station and stopped the train

>>34589447
This is not an argument.
>inb4bait

>did a /bunch/ of ket to od
>just khole'd due to apparent natural tolerance
>sobered up and just laid there for a bit, crying

>kicked out of house when 17
>addicted to heroin
>sister who got me into rehab dies
>depressed beyond belief
>drive up north to woods
>walk into woods with bottle of whisky and bottle of pills
>start drinking and popping
>wake up the next morning covered in my own puke
>drive home crying
>get my shit together and leave a "normal" life

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>>34584989
>death by cop.

Instead of putting those who actually contribute to society in harms way and traumatizing some police officers, just wander into the woods and shoot yourself.

Assuming you don't also fuck that up, it should be the end of your pitiful existence.

Why isn't cyanide legal...

>>34584989
Wew, dude, do your parents think you tried to kill yourself because you didnt get a videogame?

>>34584989
If you were really considering paying people to be unbanned from a chatroom you really do kill yourself. Jesus christ, i don't even care if you have a bunch of other bad shit precipitating this, that's a low too low to sink to and keep on living.

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>>34585103
Cops are less likely to shoot whites than blacks. But if he does it will be a non-lethal shot to the foot or something. Unless he is black or something then the cop wont kill him simply for being white.

>>34585143
>all girls hate me

Fucking this. I don't understand. Giirls i've never even noticed before show that they hate me when Im walking through halls. A lot of times when I pass a chick I can see her turn her head to look back at me through the corner of my eye when we pass eachother. Im too scared to see what disgusting face they are making at me.

>>34584989
Gun. (Originally)

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Attempted suicide after a rough breakup with my first girlfriend. I attempted to slit my wrists with a double edge razor blade (I had an array of sharp objects hidden in my room due to self harming in the previous months, however a fresh blade seemed like the best way to inflict the damage required to exsanguinate oneself)

Well turns out slitting your wrists is not as easy as pop culture would make it out to be. I eventually gave up after carving up my arm over the period of several hours.

I came clean to my parents (who promptly freaked the fuck out regarding what had just occurred) and I was taken to the nearest hospital by them. Stayed overnight and was fortunate enough to receive a competent and well informed psychiatrist who assessed my situation. We had spoken about 2 times over the course of my overnight stay where I was finally able to speak freely regarding my breakup and family issues (which I will not go into detail about, would require a post of its own).

After being released I barely graduated high school (All this occurred in late April, school ended mid-June), and became your typical 17 year old NEET. The extent of my hobbies would be browsing /r9k/ and /b/ and playing TF2 10-12 hours a day. I did that for about a year.

However, since turning 18 I have been making an attempt to crawl my way out of the hole I've dug myself into. I recently got an entry level sales job after my cousin introduced me to the hiring manager. I finally have health insurance and dental plus a retirement savings account and free gym membership (which I began using).

I know it might seem like its impossible to dig yourself out of the hole you've dug yourself into but you can and you will, little by little. I still have a long way to go.

Wherever you are in life, start now. It's either that or just roll over and die.