>tfw 27 >tfw all of your happy, innocent memories of wandering

>>34576713
I still have nightmares where I show up to class on the day that a big project was due without having done any of it. Then I wake up anxious

>>34576713

Life seems to be a black and white silent movie about nothing, flickering silently on film superimposed onto the retinas of my eyes.

The movie is almost over.


Suicide note found in Aokigahara Suicide Forest

>26
>Still horribly emotionally immature, severe aversion to affection and intimacy
>Not a woman, so no male to come and "protect and fix" me
>Over the age of 20, so no women are willing to deal with yet-another-soft-mind, they all want their future husbands and granite-like minds

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Anyone else clocking out with 50+ hours this week?

No? Just me? Swell.

27, by the by.

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>28
>High School Reunion coming up
>I'm still a loser at a dead end job
>Oneitis has become a bodybuilder and looks better than ever
>She will never stomp on my balls and call me a sissy

Skate or die

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>>34576713
>all of your happy, innocent memories of wandering through the halls of middle school and high school

>happy

>high school


404 error for me

high school was wall-to-wall shit between getting bullied in school and then having a violent autistic father & violent autistic cokehead old brother to shit up my life when I got home as well.

I was a numetal mallgoth faggot, but not even an edgy failed normie one who was into Korn and Slipknot, I was into Linkin Park and Rob Zombie and Marilyn Manson and also secretly pop-punk like Sum 41 and Blink 182


but yes, I do replay those memories and add my little director's commentary like "oh I should have kicked that guy in the dick"

I'm 31, no degree other than high school and have been a NEET for almost three years now.

but at least I'm sick of the NEET ride and want to get off of it FINALLY know what I want to do with my life, after wasting pretty much half of it.

>>34576713
>25
>starting a 16$/hr job on the 7th
>not a KHV, but the social environment of 25+ is a different ball game, so I haven't fucked any new girls.
>looking forward to being able to pay off student loans and move out

>>34576899
I still dress like I'm constantly on my way to the 2002 warped tour

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ut8PEP4XKI

I find it hard to believe that any robot enjoyed high school. It was like a living Hell. Literally prison only with more work.

>>34576965
thats so cute OP that used to be me in

>8th grade

I'm turning 25 in a few months is this how my empty life ends

>29
>made a facebook because i got into a car accident everyone at work was like i was looking for you on faceboook at my birthday party at the hospital someone gave me a facial so i had deleted it
>i looked for my friends everyone is married

>>34577182
>i got into a car accident everyone at work was like i was looking for you on faceboook at my birthday party at the hospital someone gave me a facial so i had deleted it


what?

>>34577233
this. what are u saying anon?

>>34577008
I didn't enjoy high school, college was mostly a blast.

>fresh start
>no one knows how much of an autist I am
>can finally wear punk rock clothes and have gay meme punk rock hair
>do all sorts of drugs
>can skip class and drop courses

but now as a 30 year old I would kill to be back in high school. You have no responsibilities other than to learn things, and your body isn't all shitty yet.

>>34576713
>25

>Never had a GF, family have given up asking "when are we going to see grandkids" only ask my sister now, who's a Stacy

>8th year into a 4 year degree, maybe I'll finish this time

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>>34576713
>be out of highschool longer than i went to high school (6 years since i graduated, 4 years of going)
>still have dreams every 3 months of being in a school

>>34577286
Very similar experience, first year was likely the best of my life

>>34577289
what degree anon?

>>34576815
save up like 2 grand or something and then at the end of the night just ask her if she'll take 2 grand to call you a little bitch and kick you in the nuts till you cum or something

she might be into it and who gives a shit you won't see her again after that probably

>>34577233
>>34577261
>i went to a friend house he asked me to sleep over
>i said sure
>i was asleep to waking up he gave me a facial
>he took a picture of it
>i deleted my facebook so he wouldn't upload or something
>at my party at the hospital everyone was like we were looking for you on facebook

>28
>NEET
>Collecting autism bux
>Dropped out of school, GED pleb
>Overweight
>Alcoholic
>Balding
>No drivers license
>Stuck in a small town
>KHV gay

I didn't stand a chance.

>>34577352
i wouldve stomped on your friends face until he got brain damage.

26 here, virgin, wagecuck

Every morning on my way to work I pray to god I get t boned at an intersection. I want to die but don't have the balls to end it for real on my own. My entire life revolves around my job (which i dislike, its not a bad job just not rewarding or high paying). When I'm home on my days off I don't do anything, don't have friends, no gf ever, no hobbies. Sometimes I drink, sometimes I cry.

I'm 25. I moved out of the house when I was 18 so I can't look forward to that. I however don't feel life feels different nor do I play movies in my head. Actually, instead I think I about how I might live my entire life as of the present another 2-3 times easily and think that's a long ass fucking time. I make my own fun bitches.

>>34577326
17-12 were the peak years of my life.

It was all a bell curve before and after though.

>>34577416
>17-12

21

fuck

I never had numbers dyslexia before, must be old age.

>>34576741
Fug I have dreams like this all the time but from college. Missing assignments and whatnot, same deal. Makes me wake up feeling anxious as fuck and always a bad start to the day.

Even my teen years sucked, honestly I don't think I've ever really enjoyed my life ever. I can
t remember being happy, maybe as a child but for sure not as a teen or adult. It just went from shitty to really shitty. I have a feeling my 30's will be even worse, and yet again I will be too scared to kill myself.

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2 weeks ago I was near suicidal about money.

This week i blew over $120 on board games.

Doom and Raptor.

Got a regular gaming group going and we're a few sessions into a DnD campaign. Very fun.

>>34577416
>>34577433
To be fair, you got four good years. That's more than many can say. Who knows? Maybe those good times will return.

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>tfw 27 in less than a month.
>tfw an entire class has come and gone since you graduated college
>tfw still wage cucking and feel like a child
>tfw I just want it to be 1999 so I can run home and watch DBZ after school and play age of empires
>tfw will never go back to middle school and play WC3 or Halo 2
>tfw existential terror
>tfw no gf

>tfw 29 and paralyzed by anxiety
I have no job and still live with my parents

>dad and autismbux support me
>have job that's like 4 hours a week
>feel great getting up for that one day of a week, then the depression sets in

at least I have those anime fanfiction stories I'm writ-
oh fuck, I gave up and watch anime all day now. Improvement? I guess?
>get awesome couch
>it kills my lower back
fuck everything. I spend all day trying to chase after fun and the only time I have fun is after I feel like I've earned it.
What the hell is my life?

>>34577526
You could run home from work and play Age of Empires and watch DBZ. I do the equivalent. Frivolity knows no age.

>>34577476
hopefully time is cyclical and the good years do come back.

then again 27-now were the worst years of my life BUT at least now they've gotten better since this last year and literally cannot get any worse.

>>34577587
Go on then, let's hear the tale

For myself I'm resigned to a year of ardor to provide hope for the future.

>25

Finally got my license earlier this week.

How the shit do I buy a car? I know you have to handle titles & tags & insurance but I'm not sure where to start

>27
>never went to university
>back in my day only the particularly smart kids went but now literally everyone does
>tried taking a couple classes but just couldn't get my tired old mind into it

not sure what's worse, having an arts degree or no degree at all... on the plus side I have zero debt

>>34577333
Software Engy

I really thought I was going to get it done last year, but I always buckle under financial stress, passed 2/6 topics and failed my year long project.

>>34577671
start on google and buy used car or motorcycle

>>34577671
Do you have the money? If not, go to the bank and get a loan. If you don't have the credit, you need a co-signer with good credit such as a family member or good friend. It's really easy to buy a car, it is hard to finance a car. Consider if your state has lemon laws, don't buy an expensive model that has 150,000 miles already on it or some shit.

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>>34577719
>just couldn't get my tired old mind into it
>in his late 20s

That shit doesn't happen until you're in your late 40s or 50s.

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>>34576713
25 here. My life has taken a turn for the worse. My life is objectively better than it ever has been, yet I feel worse than ever. Gonna shoot up test soon and see if that's the cause. Good luck to all robots and godspeed.

>26
>own a nice house
>have a high paying engineering job with lots of growth potential

Yet somehow i cant find happiness in anything and waste my days away doing nothing and hope that i die in my sleep every day

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Who /backpain/ here?

I don't even know anymore, I don't know what I want to say or what I want to hear. It seems like I'm just messing around and never getting into the point, at everything I do.

I don't know if I'm a whinny faggot or a autistic fuck up and honestly, it doesn't even seem to make a difference now. I keep going to these kinda of places to get my 'social interaction' fix and telling myself that I don't need anyone in my life but it's all a lie. I really don't know what I should do or what I want to do.

And time continues to move on, friends having children and I don't know how to even speak properly at 27 years old.

>25.75
>lost girlfriend of three years in May
>hang out with many girls of all ages
>18-year-olds, 20-year-olds, 22-year-olds, 24-year-olds
>have many girls wanting to model for my photography (a hobby I take very seriously)
>but, I don't have a job.
>I also don't have a car.
>I also live at home with parents.
>I also drink every night.
>I can't quit smoking ever since I started back up when my ex dumped me
>Think of her almost every day.
>Every day my values slowly corrode more and more.
>Feel like a failure.
>Have spent the past 45 days looking for the right car to buy.
>They're all scams. Overpriced this. Rebuilt title that. Been sitting for two years and hat rodents living in it.
>Dad went in for biopsy, might have cancer.
>Sister on other side of country might not be able to afford rent.
>Other sister's marriage is suffering more everyday.
>I miss my car. I miss my ex girlfriend. I miss my dog. I miss being a good guy.
>Had sex for the first time in a long, long time the other day and I did not enjoy it.

Be conscientious of your every move, youngbots. The ground shifts beneath you.

>>34577771
ok broski, you try going to university after your brain is used to the same mundane tasks for the past 7 years... university which is mostly kids much younger than you, and classes with shit like writing 10 pages on what an author meant by the curtains in the room being green (had to upgrade a communications class to start)

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>go to a 25+ thread
>people bragging about their engineering jobs
this shit is the fucking worst
>I was born with raw intelligence but I'm not happy and want to die
>I make a lot of money and want to die
>doesn't mention suicide
>just goes to these threads to brag about their salary or houses
every fucking time

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Any other old bots get legitimately angry when they see 18-23 year olds having fun or being in relationships? You realize just how much you fucked up and missed out on a normal youth.

Whenever I go back to my college town I have anxiety attack and fly into depressive rages when I see people partying. I am so fucked up.

>>34577671
If you don't know what you're doing, you should just go to a dealer. You're probably more likely to be fucked over on craigslist.

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>>34577618
>let's hear the tale

of these last few years?

It's not very interesting but it's nice to have someone ask

>worked the same wagecuck job since I was like 19

>new owners take over

>they change everything and get mad at me for not knowing how to do things that I was never told how to do

>barely get along with them

>finally they fire me after I missed one shift

>too depresed and no self-esteem to look for new job

>around the same time I had enrolled at a web design program at community college

>things were manageable for the first few months, I wanted to kill myself and didn't understand shit once we got into the back end of coding

>dropped out of that

>even more depression and lack of self esteem from understanding the simplest forms of coding.

>full NEET

>had a filling that popped out of my mouth years ago but was too anxious to have it fixed

>one day I hear a *pop* in my skull and I experience the worst physical pain of my life

>can't sleep, just having my mouth closed sends waves of pain through my brain

>get infected tooth, and wisdom teeth pulled

>get tested for funny sex diseases around the same time because I dicked around years ago and felt shitty since

>There was something, coupled with the infection in my tooth, but nothing serious

>finally my fucking dog dies over the summer, my best friend and really only friend of 12 years. I was always telling myself that the reason why I didn't get a job and move out was because I wanted to spend as much time with him as possible.

>start taking walks without him

>walks turn into bike rides and jogging, days turn into weeks into months

>rediscover my love of music and how it was the only thing that kept me going through the years since I was like 10 years old.

>want to give that joy of music back to other people who need it as much as I did.

>>34577988
My sympathy, anon. Nice Hitler dubs though at least

>>34577943

Yes. Seeing high school kids in relationships used to trigger me but now they just look like children to me so it doesn't hurt, but the 18 to like 22ish demographic....that fucking hurts. Could not imagine what its like to have your life together at that age. I'm super jealous of younger people getting what they want out of life.

26 here.

I tried to see an escort to lose my virginity for the second time. The first time I couldn't get hard and felt weird about the whole thing. This time I tried booking 2 of them at the same time because I figured it would more easily let me escape into a purely sexual state of mind.

While I did feel more comfortable during the meeting, I still wasn't able to fuck them. In fact, I don't really know what went wrong. When they were giving me head it felt really uncomfortable, almost painful at times. When one of them tried to put my dick in them it felt like my dick was getting crushed. I would get hard, then lose my erection quite often. I also had to stop twice because I got a strong urge to piss both times. I'm actually quite worried something is wrong with my penis, but I'm able to get hard and come on my own.

I have to say even though I was a nervous wreck and for some reason my dick was just a mess, it was nice just to be with some women who at least didn't seem outwardly repulsed to be talking to me. Cuddling and just being able to kiss them was such a serene experience. Just being able to feel comfortable being next to someone naked and caress their soft body while they lie next to you and smile is idyllic if you forget about why you're really there. It really made me yearn for the real thing.

The tone really changed at the end of the session though, and I could tell they were not enjoying my company. It felt like a rejection, even though that's totally irrational response since the entire situation is a fabricated pretense, and obviously they wouldn't actually like me in real life anyway.

I sent one of them an email thanking them for the session. Now I'm out a bunch of money and I've felt like shit for the last couple of days.

I don't think things will ever get better for me at this point. It is such an existential disappointment to have to cope with the idea that I'm so flawed that i'll have to remain alone for the rest of my life.

nebody else in college?

>>34578172
I'm in college right now, fellow college anon.

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>>34578041
Thanks senpai. After hitting bottom, you can only get back up.

>>34578191
what are u studying?
Originalego

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When i was 24 I got the taste of the normie life for one day.
>go to cousin's house
>they're playing beer pong
>i'm sitting on a chair
>they said I could join
>join
>I'm a natural because I have a dart board that I play with all the time at the house
>wipe out the table and people are cheering
>qt girl hugs me
>get drunk for the first time
>we are all laughing and talking
>we ate some mcdonalds later
>feeling loose, feeling like I belong for the first time
>time stood still, I felt truly happy for the first time in my life, my brain was realizing all kinds of feel good chemicals
>I inhaled a deep breath and soaked it all in knowing that this moment will be one of the happiest times of my life, I got a slice of that normie life
>tfw it was only a one night thing
>had to go home across the country
>will never feel that feel again
>now back to voluntary solitude
>27 years old Virgin
>will never go back to that one day where I was a normie
>will never get another sip from the normie cup
>tfw there are people who spend their weekends like that
>there are people who spend their college years like that
But I'm thankful for that one time when I was a normie for a day. It is something i will cherish for my entire life and I'm grateful for that opportunity

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>>34576713
>32
Tired of all the kids here

>>34578231
rhyme

>>34578220
I'm not in university, just community. I'm doing an associate in science for a transfer program to a university.

>>34577371
>28
>NEET
>No drivers license
>Stuck in a small town
>KHV gay
Fuck, me too. I thought I was the only one. Not having a license is the biggest indignity of all, I'm trying to get mine now so at least I can go be sad and alone at the park or something and drive to the liquor store (not an alcoholic yet I don't think, just drink a lot).

>>34578277
coolio schoolio

>>34576713
>Ctrl-F 25+
>0 results

Use the title field next time bros

>>34578343
jc jc

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>>34576713
>gonna be 21 soon
>just joined the military
>am miserable
>am going to spend the next 4 years being miserable and forced to do things I never do
>will end up being 25 and posting here about how life never gets better

Future planning here

i'm tryna skip my welding class 2nite

>>34577943
>it's just 18 - 23 yr olds
Anon, literal middle schoolers are getting their fuck on right now

>>34578390
good, I hope u die

>>34578390

nah man you're doing it right, just try to use the military to start a career if you can.

>>34578456
wrongo, both of u should kill urselves

>>34578475
o.e.o., idrgaf

>>34578390

honestly kid, barring some engineering degree, the military is the best thing thats going on in the economy right now.

Just do one enlistment and then use the TA and GI bill to get a legit degree for free. At least you won't be a complete bitch when you're done

>>34577771
Depression does a number on the brain man. I've only been out of school 5 years but I know I can't concentrate to the degree I once could. Not good since my wagecuckery depends on being able to do so for extended periods.

>>34578535
the best thing in the economy?!
What the fuck does the MILITARY PRODUCE?
ALL IT DOES IS DESTROY AND WASTE TAXPAYER MONEY, people in the military are fucking gaping endless pits

>>34577943
>>34578058
That kills me inside.

>>34576815
Is this her? Jesus!

>>34578554
Same here. i can't concentrate for shit. My mind feels fucked and I can't learn anything only on the happy days where I feel like superman. But mostly I feel like shit.

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>>34578390
Anyone ever feel like they're five years behind everyone else? I used to have trouble talking to people I wasn't familiar with. I didn't know what to say, or how to say it. Having to go do anything relating to other people was an embarrassment waiting to happen.

Now I've figured it all out. I can talk to basically anyone no problem. If I had been like this five years ago, like everyone else, life would have been great.

>>34578299
What are you studying mysterious college anon?

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>>34576741
>it's another "frantically wandering the halls looking for your classroom but you can't find it" dream

>>34578567
its a FUCKING JOB ASSHOLE. Thats what the fuck matters. Any non-private sector job is equally worthless. fucking shitbag.

did you notice i also hinted at a STEM degree

>>34578637
i'm takig two welding classes
industrial, commercial wiring
physical geology
calculus
physics

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>>34576815
>the old cuck in the background "working out" in a fucking wool sweater looking on forlornly

Gas that fuck. His body language gave me cancer just now.

>>34578700
In the end, the welding classes will get you the farthest. Watch it happen.

>>34578690
no it's not even a job, it's a bunch of mental retards going on fucking skirmishes that no1 who ever created anything believes in, but guess what would happen if the military shut down- the same scumbags we were paying to "PROTECT US" would kick in our doors

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>>34578700
that's too many classes anon. How the fuck are you supposed to learn all that shit?

>>34578740
idk but i'm learning it

Hey, to the fag who wants to join the army

Everyone I know who joined came back married
Take that however you will

>>34578740
I know some universities offer free courses after a certain number of hours. I'd take a fuck ton of courses if it meant bringing down a tuition.

>>34578749
how old are you anon? are you in your early 20s?

Old fag here.. TFW lost 6 friends in Iraq and 1 in Afg, were 17 through 19 then not sure what im even getting at

>>34578783
25
originz

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>>34578456
>>34578535
I just want to play video games.

>>34578535
I'm thinking of doing that but I just feel so demotivated. Wish I could have been able to choose infantry. Man I was in college before but things were supposed to be different. I hate everything man, why are normies allowed to torment us and get away with it

>>34578625
At least you're not like me. Every day of my life I had this cunt single mother who never shut the fuck up. Told her life story and every detail of my life to everyone else. So I had people asking ne unsolicited questions and always threw out vague responses so they'd leave me alone.
Never got the chance to explain myself or think of a valid response. So while I'm sitting in front of military personnel who now want specific as fuck responses I can hardly express myself or make a clear response. Ended up going with the flow and saying yes. God fucking dammit.

At least you can start now.

>>34578625
yeah somewhere between 5 or 10 years.

I'm 31 and only just now figured out what I want to do with my life.

When I was in college I was hanging out with people several years younger than me and had more in common with them than anyone my age.


I remember when dubstep was a big meme like 5 years ago and everyone my age was like "haha wow kids these days don't know real music!" but I was loving it.

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>severe cystic acne


Don't talk to me about having fun in hs

>>34578625
This exactly, but maybe more like eight or ten years behind. I finally have social charm perfected, but I'm so behind that it seems impossible to catch up to everyone else. I missed that window when it would have mattered most, I'll never be in those same situations to make the social and business connections I should have. People being super weirded out by me instead of charmed or even neutral towards me fucked up the course of my entire life.

>>34578767
I believe the moving to another country thing does it. Like, I use to laugh at people saying they are going to move to Asia and get a g/f... until my not so attractive family member with little social skills moved to South Korea. Dude got a girlfriend, like... actually got to stay at her apartment and everything. Now family member is in Europe, they now have a new girlfriend from Slovakia. They seem very happy these days. Trust me, this person was somewhat pudgy and awkward. Now they are somewhat pudgy and beam with an awe inspiring light. I think there's some real truth now. I've been convinced.

>>34578767
We all fucking know about the sluts and whores who try to steal military mens benefits and pay

>>34578289
Good luck, m8. Getting your drivers license really opens up a lot of options. I got my learners permit at 14 and literally haven't got behind the wheel since. Even thinking about it gives me horrible anxiety.

>>34578211
i dont know anon i hit rock bottom a while back and said this exact same thing and i somehow keep finding basements and bomb shelters and udnerground facilities

>>34578767
I don't believe that "roasties want to steal my anime money after they divorce me" MGTOW MRA meme pill bullshit BUT for sure almost all the girls who marry military dudes are doing it solely for the benefits and money in case their practice husband gets blown up while defending Israeli interests in some sandy shithole.

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>>34578231

that story made me sad, anon. i remember days like that as a young kid too, i'd give anything to live those days just one more time.

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>tfw 26 in community college
>talking to 19 year old girls with ease
>don't look 26
>Look 22
I'm not into those girls I'm into women in their 30s with huge mom asses and tits.

>>34578935
well I suppose that yeah while you think you may have hit bottom you're just caught up on a tree branch hanging off a cliffside like a looney tunes cartoon, or resting on some steps before you keep tumbling down.


Or once you hit bottom you can just keep crawling along and dragging ass some more.


but you gotta get back up eventually.

>>34576767
Is it possible for a gayboy to come and fix me? Or at least take advantage of my virginity and JUST mindset?

>>34576713
>31yo khv full on wizard

Maybe i crash landed on earth from someplace else and got reincarnated here.

I realized through my life that things like
>happiness
>joy
>success
>feeling good
>self worth
>love
>any of the stuff i'm missing
are concepts that need to be learned by a human by experiencing it from the early ages of life.

If one can't build on reference from these experiences because one simply didn't have any or nearly enough of them.

That one is simply fucked.

I came to realize that all the good things that I saw were seemingly happening to the people around me time after time after time with ease is what is actually "normal"

I realized that I'm the odd one out.
It's me who hasn't had all of that is the one that abnormal.

Fuck I hate all of this.

>>34578625

I'm more like 12 or 13 years behind and I'm never going to catch up. I've already missed the boat.

>>34576713

>tfw have recoccuring dreams that im still in high school doing random things with people i havent seen or thought about in almost a decade

>wake up and have to think for a second about where i am in time

im 27 jesus why does this keep happening they arn't even happy dreams just disorienting

>>34579058
I have these all the time
>have a dream I'm 17 playing gears of war again in 2007
>keep calling the other team faggots in the lobby
>wake up and realize it was a dream
>feel lost in my bed
>want to go back but can't
>have to continue living life
it's the worst feels because if i stood in that reality I would force myself to do shit

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>>34578963

>tfw 31

>tfw have the facial hair of a 16 year old

>tfw have the hairline of a 45 year old

>tfw have the stomach of a 9 month pregnant woman

>tfw have the penis of a 13 year old

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>31
>just can't adapt to normie life
>a 21 year old with the body of a goddess gives you a chance yet you STILL fuck it up because you can't relate with people
>you know you're too far gone and that you'll just kill yourself in the future or simply die an early death

>>34577352
I've never understood this, I mean I was in the group of kids in highschool that sold you weed but none of my friends would have ever even considered this, and if they did they'd be ridiculed out of town for jacking off to their friends face. Closest thing I can remember is a cum filled oreo being eaten, but it was given to somebody none of us would've called a friend.

>>34578923
Thanks man. Thinking about driving makes me anxious as all fuck too. If the average person this age is going to die it'll be because of a car accident and I can't even be a passenger without freaking out about that. I'm trying to suck it up and deal though, at this point I'd rather risk it than keep living with so little freedom. If your area is rural too, I like to comfort myself with the thought that at least it's way safer than someplace with highways or a lot of traffic. Biggest danger is probably deer desu.

>>34578923
>>34579254
I hate driving too, i would rather walk
I fucking hate the need for driving. Why can't we just ride horses and shit

>>34578828
>I'm 31 and only just now figured out what I want to do with my life.

What's that anon?

oregano

>>34579296
Have you ever rode a horse?

I think it's more scary than riding a motorbike.

just carved out a small crystal to live in, I travel light so getting there won't be a problem

she couldn't have been more ahead of the curve, I mean a fucking Dreamcast? I wish I had more sense, or at least the level I have now

>32

I am content building monuments to their magic, though. I figure an album for each one, I have at least that much in me

>>34576713
Man... can we have a 35+ general? These threads make me feel old. Also, fuck... why am I still on 4chan, holy shit.

>>34579254
>i would rather walk
Same, but unfortunately it's impossible to actually get anywhere like that when you're out in the country. I love to walk in the woods though.

>>34579296
>Why can't we just ride horses and shit
Only rich people can afford those, they smell bad, and they're so dumb they're probably more likely to paralyze or kill you than a car, which is saying a lot.

>>34579312
Being a trap mostly
The sole idea of getting my boipucci raped by a pack of niggers moist the deep innies of my boi-poochie

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>26
>still spend all my free time playing videogames

>>34576713
I hardly remember High School and Middle School. I'm 30, but those years just weren't that great and I didn't bond much with my students are participate in school. It is all a vague fog.

34 yo, and for the record i'm only suicidal when i think thoughts. I try to do that at little as possible.

>threw away the love of my life
>no driver's license
>2 little bros are wildly successful, building families
>I'm in a filthy one-room appt
>meme degree and no prospects
>smoke 2 packs a day
>dull the emptiness with weed and whiskey
>dirty clothes for the last 3 months
>no motivation to maintain what little friendships i had

I'm actually a reasonably talented musician but i could never work with other people, always something to set me off and quit any project. Never even wrote a decent song. It's all a jumble of top-tier cringe in my head. Shit is completely FUBAR boys.

25
Still live at my parents
Managed to get a good job
Depression kicked in
Haven't do any actual work in over a month
Bosses start to ask questions
Can't even gather my focus to play VG or choose a movie
Parents talk about selling the house, probably to get me out.

>>34577553

fuck same...how do i over come it

>>34579296
I've never had a license and I'm 25. I just walk everywhere or use public transit.
>>34579334
I had a co-worker who loved horses. One day they came into work, I could see that half their body was purple/blue and swollen. Their newest horse got spooked on the trail, panicked, threw them off, and then tripped and fell on them. I'll never ride a horse.

>>34579312
Not that other anon who replied with the boipucci nigger thing, I'm becoming an audio engineer/music producer/musician.

My dream is to immediately sell out and make shitty top 40 radio music and use the money from that to then make music that I want to and most people wouldn't listen to.


Ideally I could change the whole current mainstream musical culture and bring back angsty nu-metal or whiny pop-punk or something, just to change things up.

>>34576965
post outfit pic

>>34579342

most of the lost souls here started out on 4chan when they were relatively young and never left

gotta wait for the millenials to age more, shouldn't be too much longer before we start seeing 30+ threads

>>34579161
this, cannot imagine anyone, not even the most degenerate hated creeps doing this. like, the person who jerked off and raped anothers face would've been bullied to suicide.

>>34579898
>My dream is to immediately sell out and make shitty top 40 radio music and use the money from that to then make music that I want to and most people wouldn't listen to.
This right here is the way to do shit.

>>34579973
I think we'll see a sharp drop off at some point due to suicides.

>>34579414
KEK


original laughter

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>>34576774
>tfw part time
>tfw even working 20 hours becomes exhausting and miserable

I used to work 60 hour weeks as in highschool and loved the paychecks and the feeling of accomplishment. I don't know what happened.

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>depressed at 25
>save up every $$ working a shitty job regardless, it sucks and hurts but I do it
>go backpacking through asia
>gain confidence, have lots of fun, get out of my head
>come back with a plan
>move cities
>get a great paying new job + high job satisfaction
>start a degree at 27
>kick ass
>feel OK and fine and living up to my potential
>have big plans, hope, future

trick: I took it one tiny shitty step at a time and embraced pain, work and fear. I also stopped giving a shit what people thought of me re: status anxiety/how I'm doing vs them. I can't help but feel a lot of the pain/sadness in this thread is because of unhealthy thought patterns of comparison. IT DOESN'T MATTER NOBODY CARES ABOUT YOU


If you are 27 or 28 or 29 or 25 or 24 or whatever.. you are OK. You are super young. You only feel old because you've never been this old before - but you are so so so young. Bollocks to what your peers think - they are young and dumb still too. You are doing just fine. The only way you'll start to see things in your life you want to see ---- is if you stop giving yourself so much grief. That's all you are doing. You are just beating yourself up again and again and you can do this forever until you are old. Plenty of people do. Why not right? Just ride the feelyshitty train to the grave! Sure. OK. Go ahead. Your call.

I'm on another train.

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>>34579898
let me try try reply with lucidity

dont go chasing waterfalls, anon.

music requires insane networking ability. Your gonna be a small fish in the aquarium. I spent half my life in music and I'm toasty toasted. Music is 63% image, 27% social and 10% talent

I only use it now to build by channeling, it helps with the not dwelling, but making a living is unrealistic.

you'd be better off hiring a graphic designer to build an aesthetic empire, then worry about the music part later, it's the least important

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>>34578670
Fuck this. And if you do find it, you realize you forgot your backpack.

>>34579992
Thanks senpai.


I don't know why so many musicians have it backwards where they make edgy or indie music that barely anyone listens to, and then sell out.


and really I can't sell out if I immediately go for the corporate top 40 pop shit, I have to have some indie or punk or metal cred to start with which I won't. That'll come later.

>>34580176
I live in a big city with some major video game studios, and plenty of indie video game developers, plenty of ad & marketing agencies, they're always looking for someone to write a quick tune for their commercial or come up with a score.

I'm not expecting to become the next Max Martin or Dr Luke overnight, and learning audio engineering I can mix and master other people's music as well to help pay the bills.

>>34580167
how old are you anon?

origi

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>>34576922
Would you say more about what you want to do in life?

>>34579723
I wish I knew, I know I have to get a job but it makes me so anxious that I get panic attacks at home. I can't even ride my motorcycle anymore because of stress.

>>34580371
yer talkin bout sales

and just like any other sales job, these people have contacts and leads. If you got the contacts, god bless

I really hope you make it, but music is the worlds biggest cool kids table and theres an army of twenty-somethings who have been composing and mixing for a decade

>>34576713
>tfw 28
>Have a masters degree in molecular biology
>mexican from mexico
>have no social skills, son never had a gf
>khv
>had to leave the gym because I had to save money, so my gains ran away
>fat anyways, the gym only made my arms bigger and ass asser, but didn't lost weight
>currently no job
there is no saving me. I know it gets better for others, but I feel my time to meet a cute girl to spend the rest of my life with has been lost, and even if I had the chance, it is very minimal since I don't have a job

>>34576713
Dude, I'm 27 and high school is all a blur to me. Wasn't that bad but it was just so uneventful and dull- school, procrastinate, homework, procrastinate, repeat. Life before internet was boring as fuck.

> happy memories
> middle school and high school

NORMIES GET OUT REEEEEEEEEEEE

>>34580599
I already replied, but to another post I guess

>>34579898

^writing, composing, producing, mixing and mastering music. Both my own and other people's. Whether it's black metal or a quick song for a TV ad or radio-friendly pop or a video game soundtrack. I actually played several instruments up until the last few years of high school. Some of it is coming back to me now.

I never had access to a DAW (the computer program that people use to make and record music) as a kid, and I'm not great with computer, so that technical aspect will be the biggest challenge rather than musical theory.

>>34580719
Thanks senpai, it's really like any other job too whether it's becoming a youtuber or getting hired at Starbucks or becoming a uh business guy who does business things and goes to business meetings at the business office building. Knowing people is at least more than half of it. I'll be going to a audio engineering school where they hook you up with an internship.

I just snuck out the back door of the welding shop with all my stuff

>>34580974
post toons

selling out so u can make good music is a terrible idea. you'll quit

T.I. puts it eloquently: "on your way to the top youd do anything, but how do u get your life back once u get there?" u can't, not really

>>34577385
What would make you happier?

>>34581065
I'd rather post pictures of my balls with my full name and address and phone number, as that would be less embarrassing.

I'll upload stuff on r9k for some real tough love and honest criticism, just not in this thread. Anons gotta stay anon.

>>34581096
The opposite is worse in my mind.

I don't want to be a starving artist that is totally mad and bitter at the fact that no one understands the genius that he pours into an obscure music genre that most people don't listen to and shakes his fist at the fact that people who make pop songs are millionaires and they don't know real music and rah rah rah

I don't give a fuck, I'll write the next big Katy Perry feat. Pitbull hit single that is annoying as shit and talks about partying in the club. I'll suck Justin Bieber's dick. Give me money so then I don't have to worry about people torrenting my shitty bandcamp songs that I only sold a dozen copies of

>>34581214
you're probably not a genius
soundcloud.com/Robert-soley-1
is mine

>>34581214
it's obvious you already sold out
if you'r worried about embarrassment u'll never be anything
not anything that will not rot

>>34581260
and rotton things stink up the world

>>34576713
never once wandered happily through high school halls

>>34581214
u hold a malevolent universe premise
incidentally you misunderstand geniuses, they don't give a fuck because they understand the way things are

>>34581214
btw, your personality is annoying as shit

>>34581238
>you're probably not a genius

I never said I was, but almost everyone who sticks to a niche genre and unsurprisingly don't become Grammy-nominated artists always have that resentment towards pop music and people who listen to pop music like those billions of people are the ones who are wrong and they don't know music at all, they just want to dance and have a good time like idiots.

and it's like yeah, that's usually what music is for. Most people don't want sad music or angry music or "tfw to inligant" music. Some do, but the overwhelming majority just want to dance. I like a little bit of everything. Sometimes I want to dance to mindless music, sometimes I want grim black metal, sometimes I want an emotional ballad, etc.

Anyways.

>https://soundcloud.com/Robert-soley-1

That's pretty good desu. I didn't go through all 200+ songs but I got some real Jeff Rosenstock-ish vibes from those tracks.

>>34581410
Good. I'll blend in perfectly with the top 40 crowd then.

>>34581441
again, not all top 40 music is terrible, once in a while a good song makes it up there

>>34581441
if u sell out
I mean actually sell out, you'll never make that record u always intended.
mark my words

>>34581467
oh no I was saying that most top 40 artists have annoying or shitty personalities, which you were saying about me.

Bieber, Kanye, almost all of them have to be self-obsessed pieces of shit to make it that far and then not break down and cry and hide in the woods once they're in the spotlight.

Just because I find a lot of top 40 songs annoying (they're EXTREMELY repetitive and simple, but that's what makes it work) that doesn't mean that it's objectively terrible.

Objectively: millions and millions and millions of people love those songs.

>>34581571
that's not true, all people can RECOGNIZE genius, but only genius can tolerate genius because non-geniuses HATE geniuses

>>34581517
I'm more interested in writing songs for other people and helping them figure out the sound that they're looking for, rather than start my own band and make it all about me.

>>34581603
i'm sorry dude, it's too late. it's the ego that wins, it's the independence and selfishness of spirit that can triumph and only that.

>>34581602
Justin Bieber is not a genius.

He barely writes his own songs, for every song that he has some writing credit on there's a laundry list of other people who did all the work for him. Like a class assignment where everyone signs off on it but only one or two kids did all the work. He's just a pretty boy dancing and singing to other people's music

Kanye West is the exception to the rule.

People like Max Martin, the ones who actually write and compose those pop hits and are never on stage, they're the real geniuses.

>>34581626
That's what a recording artist does, but not what a music producer does.

Someone like Rick Rubin didn't get where he is today by being a one-trick pony egomaniac.

>>34579334
I have. Loved every bit of it.

>>34579397
>>34579725
You know you can wear safety gear like you do when you ride a bike right? It's not as dangerous as the millions of people who don't drive properly. I have been on public transit and gotten into vehicle accidents. You've got 60 year olds allowed to leave their homes unsupervised and psychotic chinese people behind the wheel.
Horse aren't nearly as bad as the pandemonium and chaos today

I used to be steadfast in my aspirations and wondered how anyone could let go of their dream.

Now I've become the butt of a joke at work and put in twice as much effort to do things others have no trouble with only to fuck up only a little less than I would have otherwise.

>>34578786

You must only befriend lower iq people that were only willing to become infantry

>>34582074
I still have no interest in riding one.

>>34580740
>arms bigger and ass asser
If it makes you feel any better this is the best phrase I've read all day.

You'll find a job eventually with a master's, though, and most relationships that start when people are young fail, because young people are fucking stupid with terrible judgement. Someone you meet in your 30s is someone you're much more likely to end up with forever.

>>34582074
Well, I still can't afford one. You got any spares lying around?

I'll be 27 this year.

All I've done since getting my degree in 2009 is play videogames at home.

How long do I keep this up before killing myself. The thing is I even managed to clear my depression but I still can't find a reason to put much effort into life.

I know I could get married and have kids easily because of my gender, but despite that I don't know if I'll ever feel fulfilled. I think of killing myself every day. I'm 25 and I've never had a job. I haven't had a close friend in years. I'm so fucking lonely and bored.

>>34576741
My school dreams always involve running away or skipping class.

>>34583016
Come on man. Trolling like this is just too low level. Put some effort into it, please. I wanna see you challenge yourself next time.

>>34583114
I'm not trolling. I'm a relatively attractive girl, I'm just scared shitless of the outside world and it feels hopeless for me out there. I'm mentally ill, if that's not clear. I think mental illness may be the only thing that turns women into shut ins.

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>its a "you keep trying to walk home and forget your car at misc. location" dream
>its a "you're back in grade school as a 27 year old" dream
>its a "your teeth are falling apart and your hair is falling out rapidly" dream
>its a "a cute girl finally rescues you from your own self-sabotaging isolation" dream

>>34581626
How many bands make it big, though? No, no. You want to control the band members, not be one of them. Helping others doesn't mean you're not selfish or independent; it just means you're using others to reach your goals instead of being blunt and ''in your face'' about the ego thing.

I actually know jack shit about the music industry so feel free to disregard my opinion lol

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>>34576713

Anyone else experienced nerve damage? I sit all day and my leg/ass/chest/face are numb 24/7 now.

>>34583167
>I'm a relatively attractive girl
>25yo
times running out for you

the one good thing about being male is that >we age much better. its just an evolutionary thing

>college grad
>weekly nightmares about failing chemistry / maths in HS and having to repeat the year

>>34584190
Nice meme, but it's just a meme.

>>34584190
That's not actually true. Old men are gross. You wrinkle, you bald, you get erectile dysfunction. Men are in their prime between 18 and 22.

>>34579625
holy shit famalam

was the transition from 24 to 34 fast? like faster than the transition from 14 to 24?

>>34584302

>you bald
Only if you don't treat it.
>erectile dysfunction
Only if you're a miserable American cutfag

>>34584389
I'm not that guy but I assume it is, everyone goes on about how time seems to speed up as you age.

Personally I don't really feel it that much, shit can feel pretty slow regardless to me.

>>34584302
It's completely true, and you're missing the point entirely

Physically speaking you are correct, men age the same way as women. The main difference is that physical appearance for a man (within reason) is of secondary importance. Wealth and employment is much more relevant.

Whereas for womyn physical appearance is the be all end all

>>34584895
You've been reading too many redpill blogs, son. It's time to go to bed.

>>34584940
Actually that information is from the peer reviewed scientific literature. That someone /r9k/ doesn't believe me is utterly immaterial. What I stated is an evolutionary and empirical fact and there are very good adaptive reasons why that is the case.

Frankly I can't be fucked explaining those to you but if you're interested look it up.

>>34584568

When you're 10, 1 year is 10% of your life so that 1 year has a much bigger impact on you and feels longer. When you're 50, 1 year is 2% of your life and it doesn't seem like much.

>>34579129
Are you me? Uncanningly close. Stay strong, robot.

>>34576815
I didn't even go to my high school reunion.

>>34580167
tfw you remind me of my mother...

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>>34580167
>Just ride the feelyshitty train to the grave! Sure. OK. Go ahead. Your call.
>I'm on another train.

fuck it, I'm getting a ticket to this train. Fuck feeling sorry for myself all day,got me nowhere.

What am I supposed to do with my free time that doesn't involve drugs or internet ?

>>34577842
your fault for not being a manlet